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jedibumblebee

:: 2023 1 December :: 8.45pm
:: Music: Olivia rodrigo- all American bitch

And I am built like a mother and a total machine
I am light as a feather, I'm as stiff as a board
I pay attention to things that most people ignore
And I'm alright with the movies
That make jokes 'bout senseless cruelty, that's for sure
And I am built like a mother and a total machine
I feel for your every little issue, I know just what you mean
And I make light of the darkness
I've got sun in my motherfuckin' pocket, best believe
Yeah, you know me, I

Forgive, and I forget
I know my age, and I act like it
Got what you can't resist
I'm a perfect all-American

I am light as a feather, I'm as fresh as the air
Coca-Cola bottles that I only use to curl my hair
I got class and integrity
Just like a goddamn Kennedy, I swear
With love to spare, I

Forgive, and I forget
I know my age, and I act like it
Got what you can't resist
I'm a perfect all-American bitch
With perfect all-American lips
And perfect all-American hips
I know my place
I know my place, and this is it

I don't get angry when I'm pissed
I'm the eternal optimist
I scream inside to deal with it, like, "Ah"
Like, "Ah" (Oh my fucking God)

All the time
I'm grateful all the time
I'm sexy, and I'm kind
I'm pretty when I cry
Oh, all the time
I'm grateful all the time (Grateful all the fucking time)
I'm sexy, and I'm kind
I'm pretty when I cry

Thank You


godessalthena

:: 2023 12 November :: 7.23am

don't want to make any announcements, but some big news is in the works.

just don't want to jinx it.

working at the craft store has been such a fun experience! I love getting to do a bunch of different things, being active at my job, the discount is amazing. my coworkers.... all much younger than me, stoned at work all the time, baby faced complainers. but as long as I just put my head down and stay on task shit just feels right.

I know our how will be cut after the holidays, but I am hopeful that maybe I'm valuable enough to keep around. if not, that's fine too.

1 Kelsey Grammer | Thank You


munkysaurus

:: 2023 25 October :: 11.13pm
:: Music: The National - About Today

A moment in time, grieved, for beauty's sake, loss.
Hey, Mr. Daily,

Whoa, you've changed! Mr. J no more. You've evolved into the DAILY! Dude, you're doing so good for yourself and I'm so glad you're still here with us. How's the wife and kids? Dad-bods are in. You're looking peak though.

Speaking of kids. I have one. I'm so proud of him. He's got a girlfriend and he's really good to her. He's a good kid. I'm proud of him.

That sun was too hot. I like where the river took me. Down stream. Strange means of travel to our destined places. I like where I landed. Thank you, Sun. Warmth comes from more than one source. Lessons learned through treacherous waves.

Daily, you look great, man. Time doesn't have anything on you. Let's have a shot of Woodford and talk about the good 'ol days.

Until next time, you fucking handsome bastard.

Your best.



Thank You


godessalthena

:: 2023 18 October :: 12.52pm



"i love you much (most beautiful darling)

more than anyone on the earth and i
like you better than everything in the sky

—sunlight and singing welcome your coming

although winter may be everywhere
with such a silence and such a darkness
noone can quite begin to guess

(except my life) the true time of year—

and if what calls itself a world should have
the luck to hear such singing (or glimpse such
sunlight as will leap higher than high
through gayer than gayest someone's heart at your each

nearness) everyone certainly would (my
most beautiful darling) believe in nothing but love"

-e.e. cummings

Thank You


jedibumblebee

:: 2023 22 September :: 9.22pm
:: Music: Queen- I want to break free

I want to break free from your lies/ You're so self-satisfied, I don't need you
I want to break free
I want to break free
I want to break free from your lies
You're so self-satisfied, I don't need you
I've got to break free
God knows, God knows I want to break free

I've fallen in love
I've fallen in love for the first time
And this time I know it's for real
I've fallen in love, yeah
God knows, God knows I've fallen in love

It's strange but it's true, yeah
I can't get over the way you love me like you do
But I have to be sure
When I walk out that door
Oh, how I want to be free, baby
Oh, how I want to be free
Oh, how I want to break free

But life still goes on
I can't get used to living without, living without
Living without you by my side
I don't want to live alone, hey
God knows, got to make it on my own
So baby, can't you see?
I've got to break free

I've got to break free
I want to break free, yeah
I want, I want, I want, I want to break free

Thank You


godessalthena

:: 2023 17 September :: 1.41pm

everything is going so well

so why do I feel my soul imploding

my whole life no one ever wanted to listen to me, trust me, have faith in me.

how do I earn those things? I am at the end of my rope.

1 Kelsey Grammer | Thank You


godessalthena

:: 2023 6 September :: 8.11am

my husband and I have been trying to conceive

I've had at least 2 chemical pregnancies. it's been heartbreaking, and difficult not to think there's something wrong with me.

but since I am considered geriatric in terms of womanhood, it will probably be a very difficult journey.

not sure I'm ready, but my husband is the most amazing man in the world and with his support I feel like I can accomplish anything.

1 Kelsey Grammer | Thank You


godessalthena

:: 2023 19 August :: 7.01am

it's all burning down.

and I'm going up in smoke right with it.

I can't express the depths like I can't express these breaths.

I am a fundamentally damaged person, and maybe I'm broken completely?

what good am I, anyway..?

2 Kelsey Grammeri | Thank You


mbenznut

:: 2023 26 July :: 7.12pm

Car Throttle
"You can only piss with the dick you've got." -Jack

Thank You


godessalthena

:: 2023 24 July :: 2.45pm

been sitting back and watching the flux of the universe

ebbing and flowing, bringing bounty and ruin

through the chaos, bubbles form in the matter

sparking a sense of organization and meaning once lost on me

despite the constant flood of bad news and terroristic acts, my heart has found a raft in his love

weather beaten and storm torn, I still feel stunning and resolute when his baby blues rest lovingly upon my corpulent frame


I just want to be better every day to make him proud of me, because I want to be proud of me, because I believe in the him that believes in me

we are all living on a spiral, and instead of out, I am lovingly spiraling up

Thank You


godessalthena

:: 2023 7 July :: 2.03pm
:: Mood: ecstatic

I am now a Mrs! we eloped on Tuesday because the small group we invited to the ceremony started getting very... selfish? so we just did our own thing. we had sushi at our favorite restaurant and everyone got along and had a beautiful time.

the fire pit and patio are huge successes!! we have had 4 fires so far, and I just can't get enough toasted marshmallows. our butterfly garden is starting to really take off, but some critter keeps coming in at night trying to fuck shit up!

also finally losing weight. my last day at work is the 14th and I already feel like this huge weight is lifted off my back....

next on the agenda... buy a house so my disabled friend can live in it and get out of the shitty section 8 housing complex she is stuck in. this has been a dream for a very long time, and my partner is completely on board with the idea. having an actual partner who always meets me at least halfway is just... remarkable.

I didn't think life could feel this good. I just hope it's not short lived. I know this marriage will take a lot of work, but he's worth it.

I could just pop, so happy.

3 Kelsey Grammeri | Thank You


jedibumblebee

:: 2023 24 June :: 10.03pm
:: Music: Taylor swift- you need to calm down

Mom, I am a rich man.

Thank You


jedibumblebee

:: 2023 24 June :: 9.59pm
:: Music: Fall out boy- this ain't a scene it's an arms race

At night we're painting your trash gold, while you sleep/ Crashing not like hips or cars/ No, more like p-p-parties

I am an arms dealer
Fitting you with weapons in the form of words
And don't really care which side wins
Long as the room keeps singing
That's just the business I'm in
This ain't a scene, it's a goddamn arms race
This ain't a scene, it's a goddamn arms race
This ain't a scene, it's a goddamn arms race
I'm not a shoulder to cry on, but I digress
I'm a leading man and the lies I weave are oh so intricate
Oh so intricate yeah
I'm a leading man and the lies I weave are oh so intricate
Oh so intricate yeah
I wrote the gospel on giving up (you look pretty sinking)
But the real bombshells have already sunk (prima donnas of the gutter)
At night we're painting your trash gold, while you sleep
Crashing not like hips or cars
No, more like p-p-parties
This ain't a scene, it's a goddamn arms race
This ain't a scene, it's a goddamn arms race
This ain't a scene, it's a goddamn arms race
Bandwagon's full, please catch another
I'm a leading man and the lies I weave are oh so intricate
Oh so intricate yeah
I'm a leading man and the lies I weave are oh so intricate
Oh so intricate yeah, whoa oh oh oh whoa oh
All the boys who the dance floor didn't love
And all the girls whose lips couldn't move fast enough
Sing, until your lungs give out
This ain't a scene, it's a goddamn arms race
This ain't a scene, it's a goddamn arms race (now you)
This ain't a scene, it's a goddamn arms race (wear out the groove)
This ain't a scene, it's a goddamn arms race (sing out loud)
This ain't a scene, it's a goddamn arms race (oh, oh)
This ain't a scene, it's a goddamn arms race
I'm a leading man and the lies I weave are oh so intricate
Oh so intricate yeah
I'm a leading man and the lies I weave are oh so intricate
Oh so intricate

Thank You


jedibumblebee

:: 2023 11 June :: 8.19pm
:: Music: Panic! At the disco/ viva Las vengeance

I don't want to be anonymous/ but I don't want to be you...
hut up and go to bed
She said, "Viva Las Vengeance"
Shut up and go to bed
She said, "Viva Las Vengeance"
Hacking at my feed, act like you are me
No one really cares (really cares)
Nothing's really real, no one really feels
Nothing to declare (to declare)
I don't wanna be anonymous
But, I don't wanna be you
In a city full of promises
Nothing rings true
Shut up and go to bed
She said, "Viva Las Vengeance"
Shut up and go to bed
She said, "Viva Las Vengeance"
Giving up the key to paint a masterpiece
What am I doing here?
Stuck here in the weeds
On a road that leads
To nowhere, to nowhere, to nowhere, to nowhere
To nowhere, to nowhere, to nowhere, to nowhere
Shut up and go to bed
Viva Las Vengeance
Shut up and go to bed
Viva Las Vengeance
Shut up and go to bed
Viva Las Vengeance
Shut up and go to bed
She said, "Viva Las Vengeance"
Shut up and go to bed
She said, "Viva Las Vengeance"
Every moment is a replay
I'm being buried alive
Didn't wanna kill the DJ
But it can't hurt to try

Thank You


godessalthena

:: 2023 26 May :: 10.27pm

life is a rollercoaster ride that you are either too short or too tall for.

my heart is the fullest it's ever been. I finally feel optimistic for the future. I finally see there's a light at the end of the tunnel.

plans for a hummingbird garden and a fire pit are coming together. the big day is set for the end of next month. I can't believe this is real life. I feel stupid for waiting so long to reach out, but I love the whirlwind I'm wrapped up in.

1 Kelsey Grammer | Thank You

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