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m&ms487

:: 2008 13 March :: 9.31am

The Changing Time

They come FLOODING out of the Buildings: It is time.
I.
I see the small people Scramble
Hating the cold burning the Inside of their Noses,
Hating their own body for turning against them.
I need a tissue, please!
My nose is spurting inappropriate mucus!

II.

There goes one, Huddling inside his hood,
Like a turtle, afraid the air, the atmosphere
Will endanger him.
Perhaps he's right.
With the smoke stack only a few hundred feet away,
And a thousand [probably more, I'm bad at estimations]
Cars; Rolling into the parking lot
Who would want to breathe this air?
It's not a choice.

Maybe gas masks will become
As popular, as fashionable,
As carting around 16 ounces of water
In dispensable plastic bottles.
I firmly believe:
We make our own Destiny.




III.

There, Another,
Her pants are screamingly PINK!
I'm sure I can almost make out a shirt that SHOUTS:
KISS ME I'M IRISH!
When I bet she's more French than anything,
She can't even hold her own beer.

IV.

Now just a few Remain,
Wandering, Aimlessly,
But with Direction in Mind.

V.

Now, all are gone; They've scurried themselves
To their destination: to their destiny.

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pamela

:: 2008 13 March :: 1.44am

BEN BREKKE
I MISS YOU
I CALLED YOU
BUT YOU NO LONGER HAVE A WOOHU

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angel_bob

:: 2008 11 March :: 12.41am

PHOTOBLOG POWERS ACTIVATE.

All thanks go to Andy who helped me with the password that I constantly forget.

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hoshi-ko

:: 2008 11 March :: 12.25am

Andy helped me with my password. Thanks, Andy!
It was sunny outside today and it is getting warmer. I loved it because when I was in the sun, it was warm. It is no longer winter to me when the sun actually produces warmth and you can feel a temperature difference. We got out to the car this morning and it was warm from sitting in the sun since sunrise.

I am pumped for more sunny days like this. I am even more excited for rain and storms.

Which brings me to my first photo in my new photoblog:


I took this out my bedroom window in France. This was the second and last day of rain during our stay. It didn't rain a lot since we were on the leeward side of the Pyrenees. All we got was terrible, horrible wind that would last for days. On this day, I opened my bedroom window and sat on my bed, watching the rain. I love rain.

I love you all.

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m&ms487

:: 2008 10 March :: 9.38am

Class in a few minutes. Then on to filling out scholarship applications. Money.

Why is it that we feel it's necessary to have the largest budget deficit ever to kill people, but we can't spend that same money on, oh, say, education, or converting every single coal plant into using biofuel?

Spring Break was last week. I didn't do much except work forty hours. Cranky people. Why is everyone so cranky?

The sun stays out until eight now. That should help me adjust my sleeping schedule. I was beginning to miss the sun.

Waves of nostalgia.

I had fresh out-of-the-oven brownies with french vanilla ice cream on top last night. It was like heaven.

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angel_bob

:: 2008 9 March :: 9.35pm

Hey, about that last entry? I just needed to get all that off my chest. I'm not apologizing or taking any of it back or anything and you guys are free to hate me or fight me or whatever. I just figured you ought to know where it came from.

I do not want to go back to school tomorrow. I am pretty pumped to see Henry Winkler though.

The movie Rudy made me want to go to Notre Dame. It never happened obviously but that was my dream because of that movie.

I went to the Women's Expo with Nick's mom and sisters early this morning. We popped over to the Wedding Expo too because Nick's little sister is getting married. Strangely this expo did not make me want to get married.

I am pumped for spring.

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angel_bob

:: 2008 9 March :: 3.20am
:: Mood: honest

Bitches, I am sick and tired of putting all this effort into friendships when you guys aren't doing anything in return. I'm done, people. I am so done. And I am completely over you. I have tried, I have called, I have talked. I have loved, I have hated. I am completely done.

Oh, and Andy? I know what you said about me. I know what you have said about Katti. I thought you were an okay person but apparently I was wrong. I never realized you were such an asshole.

Ben, way to leave me hanging like you always do. It's always for another woman too.

Jessa, I think the way that you treat your marriage and your child is ridiculous. You have basically cut that part of your life out and that "horribly rankles me." It happened, you need to deal with it and admit it instead of completely ignoring three years or you might have some issues in the future.

Anyway, I know I'm being a bitch, all judgmental and whatever but I just need to get it all out.

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angel_bob

:: 2008 7 March :: 11.03pm

I am way too hormonal lately. I watched Martian Child the other day with Nick and cried. I've been reading Marian Keyes and crying for no reason. I watched New Amsterdam and cried.

Silly woman-ness.

I'm supposed to pick up the girls tonight. I was all ready to get them at 11:53 but their plane done gone and got delayed and isn't coming in until 1:08 1:13 1:23 1:29 1:22. I best not get sleepy or we're going to have issues.

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angel_bob

:: 2008 6 March :: 11.58pm

I worked from 11-5 then babysat from 6-11.

I am wiped out. I don't want to go to bed though because I feel like I just wasted my day.

I got a new phone. News at 11.

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angel_bob

:: 2008 5 March :: 10.57pm

You know that girl in your math class who knew your professor really well because she babysat his kids?

Yeah, tomorrow I am totally that girl. Just replace math with folk and square dance.

I just hope it goes well. I haven't babysat in about three years. The kids seemed awesome and they will be asleep for half the time I'm there anyway. I'm just nervous for nervous sake I suppose.

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angel_bob

:: 2008 5 March :: 12.35am

I do so enjoy receiving drunk phone calls. Especially when they include stories of mysterious makeouts in the oldest bar in Boston. Next time you're drunk, give me a ring.

I am terribly jealous that my friends are wandering around Boston and getting trashed at ancient bars. I am sitting here trying not to think about how I just indirectly admitted to Nick that sometimes I miss the opportunities I would have if I were single and planning my bus ride to work tomorrow. This adult stuff sucks.

I just want to party like any other college kid during my spring break.

It's nighttime, I'm getting down like I usually do.

Nick mentioned that the reason I might not be yearning for children like I usually am is because we have kitties. I think that he's right but I want to think that I'm over the marriage and children thing. I want to think that I am okay with where I am right now and I don't need any of that other stuff. And I do think that. I am convincing myself so far so who knows if it's true or not.

Blah blah blah.

I need a vacation. But not the kind I keep giving myself. I need a college kid, let it all hang out, party til dawn vacation.

I don't know what else I was going to say. Who wants to pretend we're all getting married and go try on wedding dresses? It'll be like playing dress-up.

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angel_bob

:: 2008 4 March :: 6.17pm

As excited as I am for spring and summer, and as pumped as yesterday made me feel for spring (I sat in bed with my laptop and the bedroom window open, listening to the 40 degree air blowing and birds (!) chirping), I really like that during winter I can throw on a pair of jeans, shove my coat on over the ratty T-shirt I've been sitting in all day, slide on some shoes (sans socks) and pop up my hood to walk up the street and go drop off rent. Winter saves me from having to put real clothes on, take a shower, brush my hair, make sure I don't look like I've been sitting around all day and find shoes to walk in. Luckily, the office was closed so I didn't even have to see anybody and it was warm enough and dry enough that I got to wear shoes instead of boots.

All convenience of the last five minutes aside, yesterday made me really want spring to come. I heard birds chirping. BIRDS! Not ducks, not geese, real live birds. And I opened a window and turned the heat down. And I thought about not wearing a coat. I had options! I wore shoes, like today, shoes!

I am really sick of living in a place with snow. I think this snow and winter crap is hitting me harder because last year I was on the beach and tanning. Or at least thinking about it by now. I don't want to have to deal with it anymore.

This cat needs to learn how to use his claws. He just tries to pull them off instead of sliding his paw forward. I usually just let him sit there a minute trying to figure it out before I help him.

My friends are in Boston this week looking at grad schools. Which is cool except I could be hanging out with them instead of freaking out about what I'm going to do after graduation. And after they leave me.

I think I'm going to play Zelda. For some reason, Nick HATES me playing the game in the same room he's in. It doesn't even matter that I say he's not watching me play. Apparently he is watching me, just like he's watching TV, even while he's on the computer. Whatever. It just makes me mad that he can complain all he wants when I do stuff on the TV while he's on the computer but when he does anything on the TV and I complain a little, I'm being an asshole. /rant

I want to dress up. I have tons of dresses and nothing to wear them to. We need to have a dressy party or something. I can't wait until it's warm. I'll never wear pants or shoes again. It's shorts, skirts, dresses and short pants from the first warm day on.

There was lightening on Sunday. It was awesome.

The end.

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angel_bob

:: 2008 29 February :: 11.29pm

The end of Stranger Than Fiction is my favorite part. I love that movie.

I am seriously thinking about getting a tattoo. I have zero money so it's not plausible right now (or anytime soon). I also want to wait a few months to make sure I absolutely do want it and it's not just a temporary want. Also, Nick doesn't like tattoos so don't mention it to him. I probably won't be able to get it anyway since we share funds and he thinks tattoos are silly. But I was just thinking about it so I thought I'd put it out there.

I want to participate in a die-in. It sounds like a lot of fun.

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angel_bob

:: 2008 29 February :: 4.51pm
:: Music: Misery

Okay, seriously blogging now
I keep playing Iron Dukes even though I am really, very terrible at it.

Have you watched Drunk History yet? I resisted it for a long time but I just watched the episodes and it is quite hilarious. It's like if you filmed me drunk and I was making up stories like I always do.

I am watching Misery for the first time. I've seen some of it before but never all of it all the way through. I always thought it was so self-centered how Stephen King wrote a book about a writer being held hostage by a crazy fan. I mean, seriously.

I am waiting on one more book. I have all of them except Rachel's Holiday. I finished Watermelon last night. It was great. I am so excited to read the rest of her books and Anybody Out There? again. Oh that book is so good!

I'm debating whether or not to save the rest of Marian Keyes' books for last. I might just plow through them. I have break next week so I can always reread them if I want.

I don't really have anything else to say. I am dirt poor again. I don't even have enough money for rent. We're going to try to borrow some from Nick's parents and I'll ask my parents for a little too. I just don't know what happened. We somehow overdrafted our account again. Ugh. I would like our funds to balance out again. Sorry, you don't really need to know that.

[edit 6:26]
Phil Collins is just not as awesome in other languages. It sounds so weird. I always say that awkward sounding songs sound translated and that's really what it's like. Except it is translated. Okay, if I don't look at the lyrics and only half listen it's okay. His French accent is really harsh. His Spanish is okay, just over-exaggerated. Not like mine is any better and I'm really proud of him for signing the different versions. I'm just nitpicking because I have nothing else to do. I just realized that the one version is French Canadian so that might be why it seems so much weirder to me than the other. I'm sorry I ever said anything bad about you, Phil Collins.

Okay so now I'm watching Disney songs on YouTube. I am really surprised that I remember all the lyrics of these. And the ones in French are awesome. I am officially a dork. (I totally forgot about Strangers Like Me. I'm stuck on Tarzan songs now. I'm moving away from Tarzan by listening to songs from Prince of Egypt. (I know that's not Disney but that darn When You Believe song is awesome. It gets stuck in my head every time I hear it.))

Apparently Phil Collins is better in Italian? That's what the rumors seem to be. I'll check it out. Okay, Italian Phil Collins is awesome. Or maybe just because I don't know Italian it's better for me? I'm just going to put question marks on the ends of all my sentences now?

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angel_bob

:: 2008 27 February :: 4.28pm

I stayed home today. Last night I couldn't sleep and kept waking up and feeling nauseated. Then I woke up this morning feeling the same way. And I still sort of feel queasy. I feel like I'm going to throw up in a couple minutes but that's how it's been all night. Just that almost throwing up feeling.

I'm still blaming the Salt Lake City air. I should probably eat something but we don't have anything that I don't have to make. Which is a bummer.

A building exploded in Eastown last night. Everyone is okay and it wasn't a usual haunt but it was freaky all the same.

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