London's Calling

:: 2009 17 July :: 3.23pm

1 chasing my dream | discovering the flaws

Upchuck

:: 2009 16 July :: 2.26pm

If I didn't come up as an ass from time to time, I wouldn't be me.

Additionally, I did not have all the facts, but needing to be an ass does not require all the facts either.

Part of me wants to continue, wiht much to say. But I do not have the will power for that (because it would be bunch of unfounded claims that would be nothing more than ficiton).

So instead I will say I am sorry and disappear again.

Upchuck

:: 2009 16 July :: 11.35am

So I feel bad for whacking her with it, but it was just to hard to pass up.

The conversation went like this:

(She) is in need of a web designer to redo her website.

I said: How unfortunate. Don't bite the hand that fed ya.

Her response: Charlie, it's a long story.

Now, I do not wish to further antagonize the situation, but I just couldn't help it.

:: 2009 14 July :: 12.14am
:: Music: LOL@lore

Can you grasp basic concepts?
Source: WoW Forum post: I implore Blizzard to let us lose
I found only a spare few with good solid ideas about how to continue stories and keep folks interested. The spectrum of replies suggests people cannot grasp how to make a story or how to even keep folks interested.

I find that really sad especially when a crap load of all -if not all- stories/shows tell just like this idea implores.

Example 1: Batman
Reason?: Because he always puts the baddies in jail, alive.
Why?: He wont sink to their level
Result: Baddies scheme together and get out.
Result2: Baddies beat Batman down. Defeat feels immanent
Result3: Batman calls on higher powers (i.e. other hero(es))
Finale: Batman & and company wins out and day is saved, at some form of cost. Be it a person(s) life or hero becoming jaded somehow.

Example 2: Every Power Rangers series ever.
Reason?: Look each over all season.
Why?: Heros take on challanges and win each ep almost in the same manner.
Result: Season finale comes with finding some new power they need and having had a crushing defeat they come out on top.

Need I continue?
These ideas are really basic and appeal to human nature. No one wants to see a story where every single time the hero wins. Somewhere, somehow the hero must lose. Even if it means losing something they will end up on top later.

I return to the topic of focus. WoW. Page #8 had a post by Gerthas of Scilla. This was actually a good one too. He touched base with some other posters ideas about falling off the Citadel. Seems like a good way to fail.

I like the idea but the implementation behind the idea makes the whole thing harder. Your last boss cant throw you into the next expansion unless the expansion is ready to release REALLY close to the time someone gets to the point of beating the last boss.
Why you ask? Because it would mean everyone simply bypasses the event and goes on like it didnt matter thus making your story telling wasted.
I do like the idea of a cinematic ending for the expansion fortelling the next expansion though. Mostly 'cuz Blizzard -namely Mike- does good stories.

Anyway back to reading this thread...ill finish this later

:: 2009 6 July :: 2.56pm

GaiKai Make games easy again

Gaikai Technology Demo (JULY 1, 2009) from David Perry on Vimeo.

:: 2009 6 July :: 2.38am

Let it hit you like a ton of Bricks.

Amazing Grace
Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound,
That saved a wretch like me....
I once was lost but now am found,
Was blind, but now, I see.

T'was Grace that taught...
my heart to fear.
And Grace, my fears relieved.
How precious did that Grace appear...
the hour I first believed.

Through many dangers, toils and snares...
we have already come.
T'was Grace that brought us safe thus far...
and Grace will lead us home.

The Lord has promised good to me...
His word my hope secures.
He will my shield and portion be...
as long as life endures.

When we've been here ten thousand years...
bright shining as the sun.
We've no less days to sing God's praise...
then when we've first begun.

Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound,

To those who serve, to those who have served, to those who will continue to step up. I salute you. Thankyou.
Semper Fidelis Friends.

upchuck

:: 2009 15 June :: 11.13am
:: Music: None, listening to NPR

Beautiful Day
So after all the stress of life, and the disappointment of still having to go to a job that I dread, I took a walk this morning.

Sure the economy is horrible. Sure my life could be put together a little bit better. And sure, it would be great to get absolutely zero responses after sending out resumes for more than two months. But nothing can take how beautiful it is today.

I decided to take a walk this morning. The other day, I think it was on GMA, I heard a lady say to try to get your activity in for about an hour in the morning, then eat breakfast. Seemed okay to me. Since when I have nothing to do on a given day, I do have problems getting going (damn those West Wing re-runs on Bravo), I went for a walk.

The plan was to just walk around the block. Since I live in the city, this shouldn't be that difficult right? Well, my block is huge and I know it. Right down the street is a ravine, and I am not sure where it goes. In my younger days I would have just ploughed through the ravine. However, I am not as young as I used to be and its not like I am back out in the woods in Cedar Springs. I still am in the city. So I took to the streets. I made left hand turns where I could. However, at the end of Carlton, I found a sidewalk the kept going where the road ended. Curiousity got the best of me. I planned on only being gone for about 40 minutes.

I followed the sidewalk and it came out right on Diamond I think. Right at Huff Park. Well, the park looked inviting, a genuine nature walk. So I entered the park, ended up on a boardwalk through a marsh. It was great. Fortunately, it was cool enough this morning to keep the mosquitos away. I saw a few squirrels and rabbits. I came across a duck and her babies. I also saw a small doe who was bedded down right off the trail. She just watched me and never ran off.

I enjoyed letting curiosity take over. It was great. I guess it was my way of allowing myself to be me for awhile. Don't plan, don't think about it, just do it.

Anyway, after such a nice walk, I came to the self-realization of reality. No matter how bad the economy is, no matter how many mistakes all of the corporate executives have made, no matter how corrupt our government, no matter how violent the world is, we still have the beautiful day. And that is a great reason to celebrate.

5 chasing my dreams | discovering the flaws

:: 2009 14 June :: 12.24am
:: Music: New Atlantic -

Update the status.
I seem to have lost my "Plan B!" envelope...anyone seen it? Big label on the front and the words "Property of Kelly Edly" on the back bottom middle. If you've seen this or have any information please contact me A.S.A.P.

Why? Because Im adrift in a sea of loathing in my mind. I cant help but try to stay busy.

I'm home from the Marines. I cannot go back. I will not be a Marine. Ever. -That part hurt me alot- Ive been home for a good month almost 2 now. I made it all the way to Forming day 3 before they said "Im sorry recruit, but unfortunately your trip ends here." Those were the exact words said to my by the Lieutenant who did my eye exam. Her Lieutenant Commander then walked over to me and sat me down in a waiting room to the side. Slap on the shoulder and said "Your trip is over. Just dont let it get you down. Take a moment, I know Id need one."

I arrived on the 14th of April, The 27th I was home and officially no longer in the service of the USMC,

I have Keratoconus in my right eye and very mild case in my left. This eye disease is a permanent disqualification for all service branches.

-Stop for a moment there. Think about that situation. I left with nothing, I expected a lifetime of service. I expected to restart life with this. I walk into it with all the confidence I can muster. I want to be there. Im willing to take a bullet(or worse) in the name of my country and the men/women who would serve around me.-

Ok so, you get told your done. Youre going home. Whats worse? Youre going home or the bonus that you could quite probably go blind in the future? WOooooo...Slap in the face aye? Ya.

I spent 10days in RSP(Recruit Seperation Platoon) during which time you process paper for leaving once your turn comes around. You dont get mail. You dont get to write mail. You work. You clean. You sit. You eat. You sit. You work. You sleep. You work. This is the life of the RSP. Depression was a huge thing in there. Gah. we had on average 35-40 recruits being sent home. Some in for refusing orders, some for depression, some for lies, some for drugs, the occasion assault case, and the broken(medicals) Out of ~35 recruits guess how many truely wanted to be there still How many wanted a second chance. Answer? 5 or less. Me being one.
The day I left the depot I left with 2 others both medical leaves on T-45/49. They were practically Marines. So close. One going home for being allergic to his own sweat the other for asthma. Shit deal.

Im home I cannot serve but God damn would I like to. I love the Marines. Semper Fidelis Devildogs! I stop by the Grand Rapids office here and there to say hello to Sgt Mullins and see if he needs someone to help watch his DEP pool. Fun nights. He's up for promotion and moving to another recruit station where he will be in charge this fall. Grats to him.

Im looking for a job. Im not finding much of possible stuff. I keep looking though.
I need a life plan again. I know what I like to do and it doesnt involve jobs really. I have no aspirations of wanting to go to school again.

Im single. I dont mind it. I dont look for a girl really. Mostly because I dont find myself going out. I dont idealize picking girls up a bars. I hardly drink. Sigh. Oh well.

I should be depressed. I manage to not be. Forgive and Forget. Live and let live.

:: 2009 2 May :: 10.40am

We came across a conclusion of bifurcation in his cranial aporia. Scattered cognitive dissonance, unlike contrasting audible syntax, can lead to no beauty.

The collusion of the two works something like bent nails and unplugged television sets. "Two heads are better than one, though." I am sorry, but this binary efficiency motto was not created with situations such as dissociative identity disorder in mind.

And so we stumble upon this desert, this jungle again. Why must we always land here? I step onto a train of thought and I never arrive where I expect. I should start looking at the destinations, or mapping them myself.

:: 2009 30 April :: 2.01am

Propagate these cultures;
bacteria-
hysteria-

and claim the deserved respect. - - - - -. - - - - [it's allegiance, or it's vengeance,
in a honorably sclerotic society - - - - - - .. ---. - with the vengeful somehow justified

where does one turn? - - -- - - - -- - - - - -- - - - .- by the allegiance they forced upon us]

for truth in roots ripped from tooths by soothsayers. deracinate the evidence from gums and fill each cavity with cement. (aw fuck, just flood that entire gaping hole.)

these lies will not be spread;
like butter with tongues as knives.
like the legs of whores for a price.

2 chasing my dreams | discovering the flaws

:: 2009 5 April :: 2.41am

Opticcipital or Optical Apocalypse

The distinct edges and hard lines are blurring. They pulsate and quiver with an unquenchable need to escape their dimensional restraints. To shift, to fluctuate in size and shape. To annoy and drive the eyes insane*.

*Read more..

Their movements are subtly unmistakable.

They are tired of defining only the objects they envelop, and wish to be seen as entities themselves. They are sick of being the outlining structure that holds everything together and inside.

To inundate, and to invade
Messages on optic nerves
To flood them and to persuade
Chemicals to make it worse

Every rod and cone there is
Each retinal layer and lens
Will rot and finally perish
As my acuity descends

:: 2009 2 April :: 10.25pm
:: Music: A Perfect Circle

A fairwell.

6th ESB Embark Specialist. for A Co. Bridge

I dont think Ill be updating this for along time so Im saying it now. Goodbye. Thank you for the friendship.Thank you for the support. I look to not disappoint.

I will be going to Boot Camp then off to MCT(30days) and follow that with MOS(21days) school. After schooling, I will be assigned to the above company. I may find myself shipping out by the end of the year, who knows. We will see. If I am, I expect it to be in Afghanistan as per the MGySgt's notice.

Saturday evening (04042009) if anyone wishes to drop by my house feel free. Im having a few folks over and I really wouldnt mind seeing friendly faces. If you to not have my address Im more than happy to give it out...just not in plain sight. Email me and I will give you it. valoth at gmail dot com

Friends past, present. Thank you for being around.

Time to grow up. Without a doubt this Marine Corps shit will go to my head. Pride motherfuckers....do you have it?

1 chasing my dream | discovering the flaws

:: 2009 26 March :: 6.47pm

FileFront To Shut Down

For those of you that don't hang out in IRC, there was a discussion about this yesterday. A farewell notice has been placed on FileFront, and it looks like as of March 30th, the service will cease to exist. While the message states "indefinitely," the parent of FileFront -- Ziff Davis -- is in financial trouble, so it returning in the future isn't likely. If you have content on the site, make sure to get it downloaded as soon as you can, especially if you don't have backups.

1 chasing my dream | discovering the flaws

:: 2009 22 March :: 1.53pm

Im not happy like I should/could be...Im over thinking. Im freaking out. Im in a bad area at the moment.