lets sleep till the sun burns out

You almost always pick the best times to drop the worst lines..

:: 2005 31 October :: 9.22pm
:: Mood: Tired
:: Music: Relient K- Be My Escape

Oh, to be young and worry-free
I feel really stressed out. The stressed out type where I think I don't have enough time to do all the things that I need to do. Could my life get anymore melo-dramatic? Yeah, doubtful. I have my monologue memorized verbatim. Haha just kidding. I need to memorize my two page monologue and also need to memorize my lines for our seminar skit. I also need to write my resume for my modeling stuff and send them out, but I still haven't which pisses me off. I just don't have time to write it and then I also need to get more pictures made for everyone because they keep asking me and well.....I don't have them. Anyways I talked to my counselor about taking the SAT's and ACT's so I need to figure out when I'm taking those and she gave me websites for colleges in California and I need to call them and see if they will accept my credits because I'm probably going to dual enroll next year and then I need to figure out everything for my birthday party too. I could go on about all the wonderful things I need to do but those are the most important things right now.

So tonight I went to play practice and it was pretty fun. H told me tonight that I am going to be a ballerina munchkin so that makes me really happy beacause I'll have a cute costume and half of the other girl munchkins all want to be a ballerina munchkins so when they find out they aren't, then I'm not sure how well that will go. So I need to find a pink tutu lol. I need to find my costume before Monday. After play practice I went to Megan's and we ate dinner and then Luke came over and then later on Lisa, Kourtney, Justin, Matt, Emily, Tj, Cohen and Brittney came over and we watched Amityville Horror which is fine even though I've seen it a million times now but it's still a good movie. I've watched too many scary movies lately and now I'm paranoid to even be in my own house.

I guess thats really all I have to say. I need to go do my homework.

Your still my one in a million <3 ashley

I'm so scared, but I'm also excited in a way :S

P.S.-Chloe's coming up for Christmas!!! Sweeeett!!

1 ..chose the best time | You almost always pick the best times to drop the worst lines..

:: 2005 30 October :: 10.41pm
:: Music: Ben to the Folds

"i wish it was last september where we could lose ourselves in clouds everyday"

no i dont!

" 'If you really loved me,' she said. "I wouldn't have to be so mean.' He likes to remember when. Such a shame to ruin this bright, lazy, sunny day. The cruelest lies are often told without a word. The kindest truths are often spoke and never heard. She said 'You've been pushing me like I was a sore tooth. You can't respect me but I've done so much for you.' And he said 'Well I hate that's it come to this. But baby I was doing fine. How do you think that I survived the other 25 before you?' The end is growing near. And we're treading water now and holding back our tears..."

I am unprepared and I just want a break. I don't know what I can do or how I will do it. I am so scared and worried.

I'm waiting up for you again, though.

TOTALLY UNRELATED: I had a lot of fun with Stef. She has an awesome apartment and a great catch of a guy. I hope they get married soon. I love Ben Folds and I hope that me and Stef hang out again soon because that was fun and we could party.

I want to just go away. But with you.
ABABABABLK Dont you hate when people just stop talking to you online...? :0( I do.
Also, a mullet-lady made me cry at work yesterday. Bitch.

Went to Roman's today. It was a perfect and beautiful sunny day. I love him.

But somebody help me straighten out some things please.
With a little Love ,
Jess

2 ..chose the best times | You almost always pick the best times to drop the worst lines..

:: 2005 30 October :: 8.16pm

Today didn't turn out as bad as I thought it would.
I just have to stay busy.. hah.
Tomorrow I'll be a wreck.
Hopefully I can just be ok again. I'm staying strong and remembering not to miss him, but miss what we used to have. Which was months ago. And I can have it again, it'll just take time.
So much for everything.

I'll be fine.

2 ..chose the best times | You almost always pick the best times to drop the worst lines..

:: 2005 30 October :: 4.34pm

I just love it when people ask me that question....

Not really.

3 ..chose the best times | You almost always pick the best times to drop the worst lines..

:: 2005 30 October :: 12.19pm

Well, I'm single.
He broke up with me, so for once I don't have to feel like the bitch.
It hurts. I'm crying, but I can't let it get to me like last time.
I haven't seen him for a week and I have been fine, it's just hard now that it's official. But, me being fine and having a good week without him shows I don't need him. I just feel like I do now that it's a for sure thing that we're done.
But, whatever. I'm young. I have to meet new people and just live right now. I don't need a guy to be a happy person. I need freedom and no one to answer to. I need to just be independent and not get depressed over this.
We had our good times. He was my first for a lot of things, but our relationship has died. We've both been miserable and it's better to end it now than later. And as hard as I tried I couldn't get over being with someone who cheated on me.
Yes, I'll miss him, but I'll live.
I need to hang out with someone tonight, because as much as I don't want to feel alone right now I do.

1 ..chose the best time | You almost always pick the best times to drop the worst lines..

:: 2005 29 October :: 1.34pm
:: Music: Bright Eyes

Ani Difranco - Fuel
They were digging a new foudation in Manhattan
and they discovered a slave cemetary there.
May their souls rest easy
now that lynching is frowned upon,
and we've moved on to the electric chair.
And I wonder who's gonna be president? Tweedle dumb or tweedle dumber?
And who's gonna have the big blockbuster box office this summer?
How about we put up a wall between houses and the highway
and you can go your way, and I can go my way.

Except all the radios agree with all the tv's,
and the magazines agree with all the radios!
And I keep hearing that same damn song everywhere I go! [hahaha]
Maybe I should put a bucket over my head!
And a marshmallow in each ear!
And stumble around for
another dumb-numb week..
waiting for another hum-drum hit song to appear.

People used to make records,
as in a record of an event.
The event of people.
Playing music. In a room.

Now everything is cross-marketing.
It's about sunglasses and shoes,
or guns and drugs,
you choose.
We got it rehashed.
We got it half-assed.
We're digging up all the graves
and we're spitting on the past.

And you can choose between the colors
of the lipstick on the whores
'cause we know the difference between
the font of 20% more!
And the font of teriakiyi, you tell me..
How does it make you feel?
You tell me what's real.

And they say that alcoholics are always alcoholics
even when they're as dry as my lips, for years.
Even when they're stranded on a small, desert island
with no place within 2,000 miles to buy beer!
And I wonder..
Is he different?-
Is he different?-
Has he changed? What's he about?
Or is he just a liar with nothing to lie about?

Am I headed for the same brick wall?
Is there anything I can do about anything at all?
Except go back to that corner in Manhattan
and dig deeper, dig deeper this time.
Down beneath the impossible pain of our history,
beneath unknown bones,
beneath the bedrock of the mystery.
Beneath the sewage systems and the path drain,
beneath the cobblestones and the water mains!
Beneath the traffic of friendships and street deals,
beneath the screeching of kamikaze cab wheels!
Beneath everything I can think of to think about,
beneath it all, beneath all get out!!
Beneath the good and the kind and the stupid and the cruel..

There's a fire just waiting for fuel.
There's a fire just waiting for fuel.
There's a fire just waiting for fuel.
There's a fire just waiting for fuel.

:: 2005 29 October :: 11.29am

We could not be doing any worse right now.

I feel like this is the end.

2 ..chose the best times | You almost always pick the best times to drop the worst lines..

:: 2005 29 October :: 10.40am

Okay so lately I've been going picture crazy so now I'm going to post tons more. Some of them are from when I was a baby and some are from two days ago lol

Read more..

kellilynn21

:: 2005 28 October :: 10.15pm
:: Mood: excited
:: Music: Break Down Here- JR

*ALMOST HERE*
Who's Birthday Is In 4 Day?!

Yup: *MINE*

Damn Stright Fools: Its Almost Here.

1 ..chose the best time | You almost always pick the best times to drop the worst lines..

4 ..chose the best times | You almost always pick the best times to drop the worst lines..

:: 2005 28 October :: 5.23pm

So today I get one of those calls that I've had before. The ones that you can already tell something is wrong before you even know what's wrong. Yeah, those kind. You proably know what I'm talking about. I had one of those calls when my uncle died during the summer and when my friend Dakota died too and then today I had another one. So I guess my Great Grandma died today which really upsets me because in the past four months she is the third person to die that I've been really close with. Nobody was planning on my uncle dying since he died not even two weeks after I just left him in TN and nobody was expecting this either. I'm really upset about this whole thing and I try not to think about it but people that I love just can't keep dying on me. I can't deal with this for much longer. We aren't sure if we are going to TN for her funeral or not. My dad is taking this really hard and he said he doesn't know if he could handle it, and I don't know if I could either. My dad told me today that he is thinking about going to the funeral but he's not sure so if we end up going we'll most likely fly out on Monday. That's really all I've got.

4 ..chose the best times | You almost always pick the best times to drop the worst lines..

:: 2005 27 October :: 10.34pm

Aww tonight was fun. I got to meet Lisa's boyfriend. He's pretty hilarious and he wanted to go into my barn and let me add that it was dark out and we were all scared, okay so Lisa and I were, he wasn't. So we went out there and then he wanted to go into the basement part of the barn and I started freaking out. I've been down there like twice my whole life and it's been during the day with my family not just two other people. I was scared lol!!

Then last night I had fun even though the play did suck and Brittani Matthews and I shouldn't ever sit by each other at a restuarnt or at a play because we are too damn loud and then the fog stuff about killed us and then we couldn't stop laughing at how they kept breaking character. It was pretty fun though and then on the way there the truck in front of us kept putting his brakes on and we didn't know that his left brake light was out so we thought he was putting on his right blinker every five seconds and Britt and Dani were swearing. It was hilarious and then Brittani was screaming at Justin L. to stop the car because she had to pee and he wouldn't because we were literally like 2 miles away from the community center and so she opened her door and was like "IM GONNA JUMP" and then we got there and H was like "why was the door open the whole way there" lol it was funny and I still can't learn this little Blood thing that Mishy tired teaching me. Oh well but I will post pictures from it sometime this weekend I gotta go.

LOVE ALWAYS, ASHLEY

You almost always pick the best times to drop the worst lines..

:: 2005 27 October :: 10.16pm

im gonna fucking throw up. i am freaking out so bad. so fucking bad. its not even fucking fair.

(ONE)

4 ..chose the best times | You almost always pick the best times to drop the worst lines..

:: 2005 27 October :: 9.46pm

i totally forgot to mention- i'm going to see the best fucking entertainer tomorrow night.
ben folds here i come

for the THIRD TIME!! woooooo!

2 ..chose the best times | You almost always pick the best times to drop the worst lines..

:: 2005 27 October :: 8.12pm

god i fucking swear i can't wait till i get to move out of here. there's no reason to be here. no fucking point and i can't wait until i'm gone and never see any of you assholes again.

You almost always pick the best times to drop the worst lines..

:: 2005 27 October :: 3.13pm

iugggggggghhhhhh! I hate school and i can't wait to be out of here. people are so ridiculous and i can't deal with them at all anymore. EVER

:: 2005 25 October :: 6.39pm
:: Music: Ani Difranco - Untouchable

Part of the song Untouchable by Ani
so fuck you
and your untouchable face
and fuck you
for existing in the first place
and who am i
that i should be vying for your touch
and who am i
i bet you can't even tell me that much

two-thirty in the morning
and my gas tank will be empty soon
neon sign on the horizon
rubbing elbows with the moon
a safe haven of sleepless
where the deep fryer's always on
radio is counting down
the top 20 country songs
and out on the porch the fly strip is
waving like a flag in the wind
y'know, i don't look forward
to seeing you again soon
you'll look like a photograph of yourself
taken from far far away
and i won't know what to do
and i won't know what to say

except fuck you

6 ..chose the best times | You almost always pick the best times to drop the worst lines..

:: 2005 25 October :: 12.02pm

Ohhh..if I only could say what I really wanted to say....

That would be the day.

2 ..chose the best times | You almost always pick the best times to drop the worst lines..

:: 2005 24 October :: 6.23pm

So I just deleted that whole entry about me being upset because I realized it wasn't something I wanted everyone reading.

For about a year now I've kept everything inside of me and I've never told anyone anything too personal just because I've been waiting for the right person to understand how I feel and today I finally found someone who understands me and it's like we can finish each other's sentances. I'm just tired of keeping things bottled up inside of me. I've done that for a year now and today is when it's going to stop. So it looks like my secrets are out.

If I hurt you I'm sorry. Don't think this was easy.
I love you.

I don't anyone to be sad or mad because I've never told them these things it's just I will when I'm ready to tell everyone else

Thank you so much Mishy.

3 ..chose the best times | You almost always pick the best times to drop the worst lines..

:: 2005 24 October :: 4.11pm
:: Mood: Scared
:: Music: Avril Lavigne-Why

Yesterday is already over, today sucks, and tomorrow is bound to be just as fucked up.

kellilynn21

:: 2005 23 October :: 12.11pm
:: Mood: blank
:: Music: Since You've Been Gone- KC

i dont mean a thing to you, you've made that perfectly clear.

3 ..chose the best times | You almost always pick the best times to drop the worst lines..

2 ..chose the best times | You almost always pick the best times to drop the worst lines..

:: 2005 22 October :: 7.21pm

I JUST THINK YOUR A FUCKING BITCH AND I HATE YOU!!

Nothing personal.

You almost always pick the best times to drop the worst lines..

:: 2005 22 October :: 2.44pm

UGGGGGGGGH

EVERYTHING'S GOING WRONG TODAY!!

WAKE UP!!!

brokenmentality

:: 2005 21 October :: 1.53pm

i love when nobodys home and i can just relax and take a shower and not worry about whats going on outside my house.

im going to the game and dance tonight with the girls.. then afterwards i think we're gonna watch both ring movies cuz brandis never seen them. im preparing myself for the nightmares.... in case you dont know.. i DONT watch scary movies. these are single 2 scary movies i think i've ever seen. and YES they're scary! lol... maybe other people didnt think so, but to me there are dead people and mirrors... *shivers...

tomorrow is my keegan day. he has to work a double at logans today... mmmm, but its ok. i kind of wish he was comming to the game with me since its the last one... but he's got a car payment due next week, so i understand.. he's so cool. i love that. :)

well.. i guess i dont have much of anything to say. see ya'll at the game i spose.

You almost always pick the best times to drop the worst lines..

11 ..chose the best times | You almost always pick the best times to drop the worst lines..

:: 2005 21 October :: 12.23pm
:: Music: BOB DYLAN

Good day.
Well, I just got back from the dentist. They had to fill my "mini" cavity. Man, I love laughing gas.

I also love days off, especially like this. I've been just walking around taking pictures with my Minolta. It's such a nice camera, I can't wait to get the pictures developed. They're all just nature shots, but it's fall so the trees are perdy.

Here's a couple of shots I got developed from my Canon. My scanner sucks so they came out really grainy and I had to photoshop some what, but they look all right. Just keep in mind the actual photos are good quality.

I want a new scanner!
Read more..

I don't know why the pictures are so small.. *shrug

2 ..chose the best times | You almost always pick the best times to drop the worst lines..

:: 2005 21 October :: 12.12pm

We used to be able to talk about everything but now it's hard to start a decent conversation with you. You can't deny things haven't changed, we've grown apart and you have to face the fact that I will no longer be there every single time you need me. The truth is what it is and that is, I do not have anymore respect for you as an individual now, you're just another face in the crowd.

wierdo

:: 2005 21 October :: 9.25am
:: Music: Wake me up when september ends

Well, i haven't updated this thing in a while.

Hmm......lets see, whats some interesting stuff that has recently happened?

Oh yeah, we had to give my dog tazz away. It was quite sad. I guess my parents came to the conclusion that nobody is ever home to give him attention, so we gave him away. I didn't know he was even gone until 2 days after it. I didn't even know we were giving him away, so that was some bull shit. Besides for my dog, not a whole lot has really happened. We basically rebuilt most of the inside of my house. We took out the kitchen floor, dining room floor, and living room floor, and we put down this wood grained floor. So that was pretty cool. Then we got a leather couch to match our chairs. Then we got a new dining room table, its glass. It has 8 chairs to it and the table sits up like bar counter height. Then we got a bunch of new glass tables in the living room. Then we got a 20" flat screen plasma tv that we put on the wall next to the dining room table so we can watch tv when we eat lol.

So yeah, not like any of that was interesting to any of you, but it is to me cause its where I live, ya know? But anyways, i'm working today, while all of you losers are home because you don't have school. So i think tonight i'm gonna go to the football game. And by the sounds of it i think me and Jessie are hanging out after the game.

Jessie, i haven't seen you or hung out with you since saturday night at my house. So we need to make a point of definately hanging out tonight after the game. We were doing a little bit of joy riding after we left my house lol. You just pulled up to the drive thru at BK, then backed up and left lol. So yeah, we need to hang out cause we haven't in a long time and i miss you and stuff.

But anyways, i gotta go WORK now.

Kevin

2 ..chose the best times | You almost always pick the best times to drop the worst lines..