abuse doesn't have to be physical. it can be verbal. so speak up and take care of it you mother fuckin, pussy assed bitches!

that's kinda funny. i read it somewhere.

my nose itches and i look like i'm picken it. so funny.

omfg doug pissed me off last night. he emailed me an apology because i just left, but i didn't write him back and he hasn't gotten on yet, though i've only been on for like...wow, ok almost an hour, anyways...i don't know.

school sucks.

the neighbors (not mine, Jackies) are freakin shooting their guns...it's really kind of disturbing and weird...who shoots a gun at 12 in the morning? or is it 12 at night? either way...

oh fuck i had So much homework tonight. i actually need to go to bed so that i can get up in the morning for wonderful school.

R4ch3l

[edit] - typos make me mad

Straight from Josie's fingertips
"... and you either have to be mean or accept them and the throbbing mancocks that they are ..."

heh, doesn't take a genious to figure out she's talking about men does it?

karl called me. Yay! i love him

well, this is the...what? third day at Jackies. It's everything I thought it would be and less...
The house is just flat out scary. the basement is...well i aint even going to talk about it. all the light switches are around the corner of the walls and im scared somethings going to like grab my arm, psychos live in the surrounding houses, and the dogs...well i just hate them. i've seen WAY to many scary movies to be able to live a happy, normal life. so sad...anyways, the computer SUCKS ASS. omfg it is like so much worse than mine and i thought mine was as bad as they get with out completely dying. I was obviously wrong. it took me almost an hour to get the google page loaded, type in what i wanted and then for That page to load and then for the link thing that i clicked on to load. took me about 3 minutes to write the report.
STUPID COMPUTER!!!

alright...aww i got The sweetest letter from Karl on friday. lol i really don't want to write all what it said, but it was still The sweetest thing. i cried and everything. *sighs*
love is great

ashley and i went home earlier today, at like one, and we just hung out with the family and stuff, it was fun, anyways the main reason we went there was so that dad and i could make a chariot for my english class. we're reading julius caesar and we had to make a project that was related to the play. anyways, it turned out really good. i just have to paint it tomorrow and then im turning it in tuesday. Its like big enough to actually be used. it better get a good grade, dad and i spent almost 6 hours working on it. it was crazy.

ok, i think im going to go watch catwoman. it looks good.

~rach~

omg i hate when guys find it necissary to question me on my virginity, and ask whether or not i've orgasmed. They don't even believe me if i even bother to answer them. they're like "oh yeah, i believe that..." its like omfg. Why the fuck do they think it's any of their business anyways? i mean holy shit stay the fuck out of my personal life. god damnit

omg i have a 3 page report to do for extra credit because i have a freakin B in biology, and then i also have a one page report to write in there about a plant that is used in medicine which i Really don't want to do. ehh i hate biology.

have to have a power point done by tuesday that's eight minutes long. i have about 40 slides, i think that should be enough, i'll have to talk slow though.

tomorrow i am so fuckin sleeping in. i'm sick of school, i wish that the damn building would burn down, but then i would just have to go to exeter and i don't like anyone who goes to that school so i'll just stick with wheaton. gay ass school
Rachel

I'd have to say that my favorite look on a guy is a button down shirt, top two buttons undone and a shirt underneath. It is so hot.

Ehh that's like actually all I have to say. I think I'm going to bed early tonight. I have to study for Biology. Practically the entire class failed the test we had last week, so Mr. Terry's letting us retake it tomorrow, thank the Lord. I had a 79. So horrible. Hopefully I get at least a 95 tomorrow. Then I will be fine. Any lower than that and I'll be pissed.

Well...that's about it sadly.

Rachel

I'm on a mission
I made my decision
To lead a path of self destruction
A slow progression
Killing my complexion
And it's rotting out my teeth

I'm on a roll
No self control
I'm blowing off steam with methamphetamine
Don't know what I want
That's all that I've got
And I'm picking scabs off my face

Every hour my blood is turning sour
And my pulse is beating out of time
I found a treasure
filled with sick pleasure
And it sits on a thin white line

I'm on a roll
No self control
I'm blowing off steam with methamphetamine
Don't know what I want
That's all that I've got
And I'm picking scabs off my face

I'm on a mission
I got no decision
Like a cripple running the rat race
Wish in one hand shit in the other
And see which one gets filled first

I'm on a roll
No self control
I'm blowing off steam with methamphetamine
Don't know what I want
That's all that I've got
And I'm picking scabs off my face


Disgusting but I like it anywhores.

I get to go stay with Ashley. We head out Thursday night.
Yay!

Dougs a smart ass fella. I feel incompetant while talking to him, but that's alright, he's good company. lol no, I love the guy. He's great.
*clears my throat*
anyways lol

I just realized I haven't written a poem in Forever. I used to write a lot in one day. I've like given up everything that I used to do because I'm always at the computer. It's really sad.

Anyways, I have to go do Biology, English and Family Living. Fun fun fun...

Rachel

**happiness**
*sits back and admires the new look*

hmm yes, I like it. All done in just over an hour. Yeah, that's a really long time, but that's ok, it's not news that I'm in way over my head when it comes to computers.

I don't know if I'll be able to update for a few weeks. Ashley has to house sit for this old woman for 2 weeks cause she's going to on a cruise and it's a really freakin creepy house so i get to go stay with her!!!...maybe...i really hope so anyways. we've been talking about it, but the only problem is taylor and trevor. dad can get them ready and take them to school though...
anyways, Jackie (old woman with creep house) has a computer but ashley said that it was kind of messed up. so i shall see if it works and pray that it does....if i get to go over there. ehh.

Chris Musick is an asshole and needs to die.
that's all you need to know.

LeChar

well....i feel really gay now.
Rachel

(better)

Good Lil' Girl...4 once
got up at 7:30 to make it to Sunday School, stayed for the sermon and didn't nod off once. yay for me!
made small talk for 30 minutes, and i was nice. yay for me again!
now i'm going to go sleep and study for biology when i wake up. yay!
hopefully i will Not be forced to go to tonights sermon. sad i know...but ehh

Say goodbye to Sunshine
The dog that mom brought home yesterday is now gone. The owners called us and dad took her to them. She killed one of our birds though. We used to have three, but one of them died from old age. The two that we had left were lovers and it was the sweetest thing. But the dog somehow got her snout in the cage and got Sunshine (she was yellow) and got a hold of her and she just died...
Now Vennie is just sitting there like singing this God awful song like thing. It's quite possibly the most depressing thing. He looks like he's about to die himself, and he probably will.
Yet another sad ending.

I have a big Biology test that I'm going to fail Monday.

My aunt Renea and my grampa had to take gramma up to the hospital today because her blood pressure was way to high and she like broke out with something and...I don't know. She got to come home but they're waiting for the test results and everything. Sucks ass

now for some lyrics to a good song...

Silhouettes above the cradle hold me down
they won't let me go the wrong way
my mother taught me all the fables, told me in the end
all sinners have to pay
but...
-I don't wanna live like my mother
I don't wanna let fear rule my life
and I don't wanna live like my father
I don't wanna give up before I die -
He worked so hard his bones are breaking
he wore them down but long ago he lost the feeling
his good intentions leave me shaking, show me how
I don't ever want to end up like he did
and...
-I don't wanna live like my mother
I don't wanna let fear rule me
and I don't wanna live like my father
I don't wanna give up before I die-
When I have kids
I won't put any chains on their wrists, I won't
I'll tell them this
there's nothing in this world that you can't be
if you want it enough
-I don't wanna live like my mother
I don't wanna let fear rule my life
and I don't wanna live like my father
I don't wanna give up before I die-
-I don't wanna live like my mother
I don't wanna let fear rule my life
and I don't wanna live like my father
I don't wanna give up before I die-

Rachel