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Black roses and Silver tears

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Angel_Bob

:: 2003 31 October :: 3.19pm
:: Mood: calm
:: Music: 30 Minutes Techno Remix by T.A.T.u.

Stephanie and NationStates
"Frankly, I don't see why we need to have elections at all," says your brother, Stephanie Utopia, over a late-night malt whiskey. "You always seem to know what's best. Why not scrap the whole political system? It would make things so much simpler."


Well, I didn't know my brother's name was Stephanie...

And I didn't know that Stephanie could be a guy's name either...

Learn something new everyday.

4 See through my crystal fearsXD | Are you crying?

mudpiegrl

:: 2003 30 October :: 6.32pm
:: Mood: playful
:: Music: perfect cirlce...i shud get a new cd

HALLOWEEN!!!
so am making my halloween costume....ama be a sheepsssss! am soo excited and trix will be a goose...(endless jokes/stories) and jennifer a cherrio, and laura a lady bug...(also joke) and jill a duck! its so exciting! am going to see the mhs play tnt..am hoping is entertaining......ive heard that their theatre sux....but kei is in it and danielle is doing costumes so...yea! um.....jackie wasnt in school today, how appropriate..and la de da....nothing much more to say~!

Are you crying?

Angel_Bob

:: 2003 30 October :: 5.43pm

This is a good music video
I agree. That is the best exploding carousel ever.

Well...out of all the ones I've seen...

T.A.T.u - 30 Minutes [Lyrics: Click + to display]+


I love you all.

2 See through my crystal fearsXD | Are you crying?

Angel_Bob

:: 2003 30 October :: 5.16pm
:: Mood: devious

Watashi wa kirei desu.
I wore my school girl outfit today.

Two guys said I turned them on.

One, after I told him that one of the reasons I wore it was because my boyfriend thinks school girl outfits are hot, said, "Tell him he's my hero" er summat like that.

Yes.

I was creepily flattered to say the least.

I'm wearing it to Kyle's party on Saturday sans (without) the stretch pants.

Booyaka.

Um...what else?

Oh...everyone keeps saying you'll get in trouble for wearing your Halloween costume to school. If they try to yell at me I'll just either bring up my First Amendment rights or bring up the fact that I wore one today and nothing came of it.

I'll try both maybe. Combined.

Heh.

Right. Well. I have nothing to say so I'll shut up.

I love you all.

3 See through my crystal fearsXD | Are you crying?

cradleofilth

:: 2003 30 October :: 7.50am
:: Mood: cranky
:: Music: Leaving Song pt.2 by A.F.I

:yawn: so sleepy....yesterday was hell...all day i was doing soemthing.....first it was school, and guard practice, than right after that i had to go to confirmation class....soemone please kill me now....ugh....im so tired!!!!! i dont wanna go to skool today!!!!

Are you crying?

Angel_Bob

:: 2003 30 October :: 6.17am
:: Mood: calm

Thought it was more than...just making love...
Will aspirins and alcohol
Someway decrease the ache
From knowing that you'll do to him
The same you did to me
That's nice...


Ohayoo gozaimasu!

I am so tired and I feel so sick, it isn't even funny! YAY!

And I'm so stressed out, I think I might cry!

But none of it matters because I don't run away from my problems and there's no way I'm staying home from school this year.

I wrote a note to Ben but I'm not sure if I want to contribute to the box of ashes.

I'll see you all at school!

I love you!!!!

2 See through my crystal fearsXD | Are you crying?

mudpiegrl

:: 2003 29 October :: 11.26pm
:: Mood: PISSED
:: Music: perfect circle

FUCK!
how could anyone be so cruel to ruin someone elses life! she crys and crys and takes her away from the fun to cry some more. and once she believes shes away from the tears, she rips her apart! she is fucking ruining her life i hate her so much before i just disliked the fact and told her so and she hated me big whoop i didnt give a shit but now she is ruining other peopels lives too and she wont even accept it! i want to bitch at her so bad but its ten twenty one and i cant possibly call her now.

2 See through my crystal fearsXD | Are you crying?

mudpiegrl

:: 2003 29 October :: 10.42pm
:: Mood: cheerful
:: Music: none right now

you know what i dont care if jackie is reading this...chances are she is in order to knwo why people hate her. yes its confirmed people cannot stand her right now! granted, no one knows for shur, emotionally what is going on in her head but the way she acts toward people. you would think that if one so desperately wantd friends, one would be nice to them and listen to them and at least pretend to be a friend. not her. as far as ive heard, she doesnt give a shit about waht is going on in other peoples lives, as long as she can cry. ~finish later

Are you crying?

mudpiegrl

:: 2003 29 October :: 10.36pm
:: Mood: ecstatic
:: Music: perfect circle

hul broke up with stacey ::applauds:: its about damn time.

Are you crying?

mudpiegrl

:: 2003 29 October :: 10.32pm
:: Mood: amused
:: Music: perfect circle

so i dont even give a shit about who reads this! i know that people i dont want reading it do, and so whatever. jackie and wender are hilarious....i love how jackie blames neil for spreading shit, when he just says what hes heard...not like she would ever clarify anything if he asked. shed tell him it was none of his business, in fact, thats waht she would do to near everyone. so shes acutally encouraging the rumours! and wender...my dear friend wender... i dot know what is wrong with him...i suppose cannot keep himself away from girls. and denying things that are so blatent! oh my dear friends! this life is so entertaining from the outside...and you cry and pout and make yourselves sorry for waht you know you cannot stop because it was your fault in the first place! you cannot make out in a public place and not expect people to talk! o lord....you keep me laughing everyday!

5 See through my crystal fearsXD | Are you crying?

Angel_Bob

:: 2003 29 October :: 9.41pm
:: Mood: calm
:: Music: No Hero by Benton Falls

And I remember the last time...I saw you on heroin...how it made me cry...oh how I cried
Right...

Tomorrow I'm wearing my school girl outfit.

I think the skirt might be too short so I'm going to bring a pair of pants.

I shall wear it to Kyle's party also.

I'm wearing my Yuna wedding cosplay on Friday.

Ya know what? Maybe I'll just wear pants under my skirt.

I know I have stretch pants somewhere.

I'll look for my black ones before I go to bed.

Heh, I couldn't find a black tie so I grabbed my father's Beatles one. Booyaka.

Yes.

I love you all.

1 See through my crystal fears | Are you crying?

Angel_Bob

:: 2003 29 October :: 8.19pm
:: Mood: weirded out
:: Music: All These Things by Benton Falls

Practice random kindness and senseless acts of beauty
I wish I knew what to do
I wish I knew how to help you

All I can say is that I've been down that road before. With Derick and all...

You'll have to ask Kristy or Kelly or Katie or someone about him though. I don't wish to speak of it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I'll take you down the only road I've ever been down...
You know the one that takes you to the places where all the veins meet, yeah
You know I can't change, I can't change, I can't change
But I'm here in my mold, I am here in my mold
And I'm a million different people from one day to the next
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I was writing in my notebook instead of taking notes in Chemistry. After a few minutes, I got to the point where you just write and don't even realize what's coming out.

That's when you write the things you've never thought about before. When you reach what is hidden in the back of your mind. That's when you see what you've missed. You're freaked out a little because you've never noticed some of these thoughts in the back of your mind.

And you smile.

Then you think about it and it makes you sad...

How could I have not noticed? We're two halves of one whole. Two sides of one coin.

And it makes you disappear from what's going on...

You think. You're no longer living your life. You're thinking it.

And it makes you want to cry.

Maybe I'll show you what I mean someday. It's right there in my notebook. All my hopes and all my fears until I reached the point of thoughtlessness...or thoughtfullness...

When Stargirl got slapped by Hillari Kimble, what did she do?

How many of us would do that?

I would.

"Maybe I should hate you for this
Never really did ever quite get that...

I'd never lie to you
Unless I had to
I'll do what I got to
Unless I had to
I'll do what I got to
The truth
Is you could slit my throat
And with my one last gasping breath
I'd apologize for bleeding on your shirt"

I love you all.

3 See through my crystal fearsXD | Are you crying?

Angel_Bob

:: 2003 29 October :: 5.27pm
:: Mood: drained
:: Music: Phenomenon by Thousand Foot Krutch

I'm fine just trying to wake the rest up
I love this song.

Nothing new...

I just wanted to say...

I love you all.

1 See through my crystal fears | Are you crying?

Angel_Bob

:: 2003 29 October :: 6.21am
:: Mood: happy

That's falling like ashes slowly from me
Someone posted a comment to one of my not-so-secret journal entries.

It was a nice comment and even though I don't know who posted it, I don't really care. I like not knowing.

It made me happy...knowing that maybe I was doing the right thing. And maybe others might too.

So thanks, whoever you are, that was sweet of you.

I love you all.

Are you crying?

mudpiegrl

:: 2003 29 October :: 11.36pm
:: Mood: bouncy
:: Music: perfect circle

people
::sigh:: i thnk ama supposed to be sleeping now....its eleven twenty nine...i met some new people from danielle. clara and austin...they are her friends from mundelein. austin is quiet and stuff...and clara is really...i dont know she seems nice...and you know me i have an extremely biased opinion...but she seems like she is about to break down into tears and is just smiling to look like she understands herself. well anyway, they werent really important until danielle told me a little about each. well it turns out they went out and that somehow turned sour. so he wants her back, but she refuses...because she was hurt so immensly by him. he feels awful about it and somehow hopes that he can bring her back to spirits by talking to him, which danielle says isnt so much talking...so the interesting story is this...she intends to make him jealous, and so flirts with nearly every guy around. he intends himself to gain pity...and so tells everyone his sob story. i heard the sob story. it was just what i sayd, cept a load more of "it hurt so bad" "i cryed that night" which you would expect me to be like o am sorry but have grown to not sympathize wiht people anymore...only to empathize because what the hell is apologizing going to do? o am sorry your heart is broken...am sorry your love left you....am sorry that you missed out...am sorry you got knocked over in football....i hate when people expect you to say sorry...it doesnt make it any better, especially since sorry has become somewhat of a general phrase, its automatic. it no longer means much...it sort of goes along with "hakuna matata" you cant change the past....and you cant heal hurt with one word. its like putting on a bandaid and immediatly ripping it off...it doesnt do much. am also getting sick of people milking stuff and shit...understandably they have feeelings wehn shit happens but they make it worse...wehn they know the outcome will be awful one way and they pick that way!...ooo dont ask for too much pity.....well anyway wehre was i? ::scrolls::o anyway...i odnt know i think its really fake...like this guy is not a sensitive one, you can tell...its like he wants people to think he cryed so that they will be like, thats awesome hes got emotions...but arg....i forgot where...o yes....well anyway i dont really give a shit about him cuz i dont know him that well but it applys to neil somewhat....because hwen i told him i hate how he is basically emotionless (okie i was softer than that but thereabouts so), he was like if you died i would cry, am crying just thinking about it. i was like grr...you so arent understanding what am talking about ....i hate when guys are emotinless....how do you get shit out of them? all three guys i dated are/were fucking secretive......and i dont think they want to be its just how they were brought up...and they dont know how to put it into words and they think emotion means tears but it doesnt it means describing how you feel okie am tired ama sleep night night night nig htnighitng sweetd reamssssssssssss

Are you crying?

Angel_Bob

:: 2003 28 October :: 11.01pm

I'm thinking....

Are you crying?

cradleofilth

:: 2003 28 October :: 9.57pm
:: Music: scorched earth erotica

so/so
well....im single again....that can be a good thing and a bad thing i guess.....i need to find someone who i can have a lasting relationship with.....and can deal with my problems and accept me for who i am.....is that asking to much? i shall keep looking i guess...i'll eventually find that "special" someone....apparantly i havnt been looking hard enough....well another day of school is ahead...im going to try out my new look and see what happens...

Are you crying?

Angel_Bob

:: 2003 28 October :: 8.23pm

I look like an anorexic tennis player.

I wish I could gain some weight, I look awful.

10 See through my crystal fearsXD | Are you crying?

Angel_Bob

:: 2003 28 October :: 8.12pm
:: Mood: curious
:: Music: Tell Him by Benton Falls

If you wait by the side of the road...then I will pick you up
Well, I have nothing to do.

I suppose I could do my French homework...but what do I get to school at 10 after 7 for if I don't have homework to do?

I cannot decide whether to wear my cosplay or my school girl outfit to Kyle's party.

Drastic decision I know ;p

Oh, I guess I'll go try on Hannah's skirt!

Boredom cured for a few minutes! YAY!

I love you all.

3 See through my crystal fearsXD | Are you crying?

Angel_Bob

:: 2003 28 October :: 6.50pm

NNY BOOTS!

I would KILL for those!

I love Nny's boots. And those just rock.

Nny!

3 See through my crystal fearsXD | Are you crying?

Angel_Bob

:: 2003 28 October :: 6.03pm
:: Music: Make Friends with Time by Last Days of April

It's only you
Cowboy Bebop quotes
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Spike: The music box is broken. Or is it? It starts to play and a haunting tune fills the air. I awake suddenly from my dream. There is no music box yet there it is a tiny one nestled in my hand. And I awake from my dream again, as if I were peeling away an onion. It's a dream no matter how far I go. I can never reach reality, trapped in an endless nightmare.

Julia: This is... a dream...
Spike Spiegel: Yeah... Just a bad dream...

Ed: I think I know. I don’t think I know. I don’t think I think I know. I don’t think I think.

Spike: I’m not going to die, I’m going to see if I was ever alive.

Spike: Whatever happens, happens.

Vicious: You should see yourself. Do you have any idea what you look like right at this moment, Spike?
Spike: What?
Vicious: A ravenous beast. The same blood runs through both of us. The blood of a beast who wanders, hunting for the blood of others.
Spike: I've bled all that kind of blood away.
Vicious: THEN WHY ARE YOU STILL ALIVE?!

Spike: Look at my eyes, Faye. One of them is a fake because I lost it in an accident. Since then, I've been seeing the past in one eye and the present in the other. So, I thought I could only see patches of reality, never the whole picture. I felt like I was watching a dream I could never wake up from. Before I knew it, the dream was over.

Jet: Everything has a beginning and an end. Life is just a cycle of starts and stops. There are ends we don't desire, but they're inevitable, we have to face them. It's what being human is all about.

Faye: Survival of the fittest is the law of nature. We decieve or we are decieved. Thus, we flourish or perish. Nothing good ever happened to me when I trusted others. That is the lesson.

Faye: I tell ya, instead of being alone in a group, it's better to have real solitude all by yourself.

Faye: The past is the past and the future is the future. A man is a man and a woman is a woman. The present is the present. I am who I am and you are who you are. That's all there is to it. Does it really matter? Or do we just think it does?

Vicious: There's nothing in this world to believe in.

Spike: Most things get better if I kick 'em...

Jet: When you and I first met, you told me something. You said that you had died once, that you had seen death. Why can't you just let it go? Forget the past.
Spike: There was a woman, first time I'd found someone who was truly alive. At least, that's what I thought. She was...the part of me I'd lost somewhere along the way, the part that was missing, that I'd been longing for.

Jet: So what kind of woman is she? What's Julia like?
Faye: Ordinary. The kind of beautiful, dangerous ordinary that you just can't leave alone.
Jet: I see.
Faye: Like an angel from the underworld. Or a devil from Paradise.


And the one quote that everyone who has seen Cowboy Bebop remembers with a tear in their eye and a frown on their face...

"Bang."

Are you crying?

Angel_Bob

:: 2003 28 October :: 5.43pm
:: Mood: contemplative
:: Music: Fighting Starlight by Benton Falls

Wait till you find...this ain't the life you want to lead
Benton Falls - Fighting Starlight [Lyrics: Click + to display]+


Ça m'est égal...

I love you all.

Are you crying?

Angel_Bob

:: 2003 28 October :: 5.07pm


HASH(0x841d414)


What guitar are you?
brought to you by Quizilla



That is seriously sweet looking. Hot smurf.

2 See through my crystal fearsXD | Are you crying?

Angel_Bob

:: 2003 28 October :: 4.41pm
:: Mood: calm
:: Music: Phenomenon by Thousand Foot Krutch

Everyone pound your feet to this phenomenon
This song gets stuck in your head very easily.

I posted the lyrics on WoohuLyrics...I love that site.

Yeah, I think that's it.

I love you all.

Are you crying?

cradleofilth

:: 2003 28 October :: 3.54pm
:: Mood: pissed!
:: Music: "dress to depress" by Murderdolls

dentist....urgh
today i got to skip skool to go to the dentist......what fun..........my mouth hurts.....and my sister is like pmsing!!!! so its not a good day for me....

Are you crying?

Angel_Bob

:: 2003 28 October :: 9.02am
:: Mood: anxious

I wish my CD player had batteries because All These Things by Benton Falls is stuck in my head!
Right. I'll need a ride to Kyle's on Saturday. My parents are going to the Michigan vs Michigan State game and they're leaving at 7 am...who knows what time they'll be back...

So yes. If anyone could give me a ride to Kyle's it'd be much appreciated.

Well, my Halloween costume is turning out way better than I thought. Hannah says I can wear her tennis skirt. It's a really short pleated one but not plaid sadly. Hopefully Ben'll forgive me. I get to choose between a couple of white shirts so all I really need are knee high socks and a black tie.

Oh I'll look so sexy...*sarcasm sarcasm*

I guess I need to talk to Ben. I don't want to make him late to class so I will not do it at school. I don't want to talk to him over the phone either. Face to face it needs to be. I could've done it before school but I chickened out.

My nail is still black. Only a little bit but it still is black.

My arm doesn't hurt anymore. It's bruised a little but now it just itches because it's healing. It itches a lot.

Erg. I'm nervous. My stomach hurts.

I should do my U.S. History homework. I'm thinking of switching out of AP and into regular U.S. History. I know I'd have to do stupid busy work and stupid projects but at least I'd pass it.

I'll have to remember to tell my mother about that.

Oh, and I told finally her...sometime...that Ben and I were together. I think it was Sunday night maybe. I don't remember and it doesn't really matter. She just said, "Don't get too attached." Hmm.

I got spam on the Woohu Forums. On the Forums for goodness sake. That's sad.

Okay, now I'll do my History. I'd do my French too but I wrote what we had to do in my planner and I left that at home. I guess I could've asked Kelly but I didn't.

Now I'm just blabbing.

Angel
You are... WAIT! - you're none of the Sins you're
an Angel!
Perfect, or close enough, and annoyingly so! Did
you always
behave so 'just right'. ARGHHH . You can annoy the
hell outta
people with your attitude, but no doubt your church
is real happy
with you. The positive side certainly outweighs the
negative,
after all, you do chores, are smart, are cute, do
charity work.
Least you know what a perfect saint you are. You
just make the rest
of us sinners vomit. Perhaps you could break the
rules once in a while, go wild - Eat an extra
cookie or something.
However - congratulations on being the most pure,
of the entire human race.


?? Which Of The Seven Deadly Sins Are You ??
brought to you by Quizilla

Heh....except I don't go to church...

I love you all.

4 See through my crystal fearsXD | Are you crying?

Angel_Bob

:: 2003 28 October :: 8.59am

Season = Crazy
You're Most Like The Season ... NO wait! Hold it!
You're not like a season at all! You're a
psycho... You need a new season created just
for you.
You either answered wildly to be different, or you
truly are a 'special case'. Independant -
maybe, Intelligent - somewhat. Weird and wacky
- most certainly.
A nut case, a fruit cake, the joker, the insane
lunatic :) However be careful or you may get
locked up.

Well Done... You're not at home in any of the
seasons, you create your own.


?? Which Season Are You ??
brought to you by Quizilla


I'm so weird...CHOP ME UP AND FEED ME TO THE ORPHANS!

Are you crying?

Angel_Bob

:: 2003 28 October :: 6.39am

Thousand Foot Krutch - This is a Call [Lyrics: Click + to display]+

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Benton Falls - All These Things [Lyrics: Click + to display]+

Are you crying?

Angel_Bob

:: 2003 27 October :: 10.03pm
:: Music: Angel on Hiatus by Benton Falls

Lyrics express my emotions in far too many ways
Benton Falls - Angel on Hiatus [Lyrics: Click + to display]+


I love you all.

2 See through my crystal fearsXD | Are you crying?

cradleofilth

:: 2003 27 October :: 9.32pm




i was bored....so i added this lil piccie of dani filth....i love his rings!!!!

1 See through my crystal fears | Are you crying?

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