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2005 7 March :: 8.52 am
Disappearing act
well as most of you know i havent updated in quite a while and there is good reason but none of you would understand so i'll just leave it at that. all i've been doing is working or just effing off around my house. i distanced myself from as many people as i could and well it seemed to make me sick....well not like sick physically but i could feel myself withdrawing from the world....i have just been acting stupid and need to stop. no one finds me funny so why do i continue i dont really know... anyways i'll see ya'll later and have fun...bye JOEy
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2005 25 February :: 5.52 pm
well as i was enjoying a nice drive to go up to the school yesterday i went and slid down into the ditch. the bumper of my truck hit a tree and it spun me around in the road. then as i was spinning my truck went up onto the hill on the other side of the road and then flipped onto its side.
well thats my story....so long beautiful truck....:(
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2005 22 February :: 11.50 am
??
I saw abunch of monkey's peeing yesterday at the zoo almost all at once. it was some crazy stuff. then i had a snow eating contest with a chimpanzee. he dropped his so i won. haha stupid chimp. um what else... oh i worked yesterday and had 4 deliveries all night...kinda sucked. talked to gravelle for awhile too. pretty fun night after that. and i am learning the green day american idiot album really fast. i just need gravelle to show me the rythms better.
have fun all
Joseph Andrew
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2005 18 February :: 8.58 am
Yesterday
Okay well i hung out with tony, erica, perry, eddy, jimi, and ally yesterday and it was effin awesome. the first thing we did when we got there was watch some wrestling things on jimi's comp. then tony made jimi pass out and he started to twitch and whatnot. then he woke up and was okay. then i decided hey lets make me pass out and perry and tony had a paper, scissors, rock fight over who would make me and tony won. well then tony made me pass out. it feels really wierd when you pass out because you kinda cant control anything thats happening around you but you know whats happening. then i woke up and almost hit tony because i forgot where i was. well i guess i scared everyone or something because i started to twitch i guess really bad and my eyes rolled back and whatnot. either way i scared them. kinda wierd though when you do wake up because you dont know where you are. well yeah thats my update and well um yeah i have to try to figure out what i'm doing today and this weekend. have fun all bye
Leo
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2005 16 February :: 10.31 am
Ok well i need to clear things up with people. my hair is dyed for reasons that i want to forget everything that happened with the bleach blonde hair. yes i know it may look like crap but thats how i feel on the inside too. i've treated everyone that used to mean alot to me like crap and i'm sorry for it. I just wanted ,like i said before ,to forget everything that happened with the blonde hair and start anew. become friends again with the people who i cared about. i will also close all relationships that rely on me for reasons that arent in the friendship area just for benefits and whatnot. relying on someone for reasons other than being friends, i'm sorry to say this because i know i've done it too, is being a complete and idiotic ass. friendships should never be based on material and other things and i'll be damned if i let that happen to me anymore or anyone else i care about. I am gonna start fresh with everyone. it's just my little way of saying i'm sorry for things i've said and done to upset people and to just piss them off. i'm tired of acting stupid also, i know i'm not and other people know i'm not so why do i continue my act. well to explain it as best i can i acted how i did because i wanted acceptance and to just be the center of attention well i am giving up those ways in search of a new way of life and that is to just not really care anymore. if people still want to be my friends then so be it, if not then whatever. have fun all and enjoy your days.
Leo
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2005 12 February :: 11.36 am
Blah - Something I'm writing
Disappear into oblivion
Never to be found again
These are my thoughts of new
These are my hopes of you
Alone in the darkness
Afraid of the light
Afraid of what's really out there
Afraid of my life
To hide in the shadows
And to fade away
What does it take for me to let you go
How long will it be before I know
Before I realize that there's no hope
After the fact that I told you so
My mind is lost in confusion
And filled with sorrow
Just let me be
Just go away
Just be there for me
How confusing my mind is to me
To condradict itself
To confuse my mind
To hide away from these thoughts of mine
crappy yeah i know but i needed to write something new
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2005 11 February :: 6.50 am
Angry yet happy
Ok well yesterday started off with me being well pretty happy then I just got really pissed and drove off. i was driving down the road wondering where to go and i went to my house...cuz i couldnt think of where else to go. and i kinda drove my truck into a ditch, my ditch, in my front yard. well as i sat there looking down at the ground through my windshield i realized i need to calm down so i did the best possible thing i could do and punched the crap out of my steering wheel. now as i'm sitting there punching the steering wheel i realize my hand is in alot of pain, well what was i supposed to do but keep punching. and to make the rest of the story seem interesting i pulled the truck out with my mom's truck alone and well just havent had a good day so far today either but luckily i have no rage left. yay go me.... oh and i broke my pinky knuckle so typing is really effing hard for me since i use my pinky alot (improper way of typing i know). and i possible broke or fractured my wrist and a bone in my forearm. i'm so happy now. lol... yeah effing right
Leo
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2005 10 February :: 1.34 pm
I so am a dj......email me if you want something i made up on a music maker program....i effing rock
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2005 7 February :: 12.52 pm
bah.....cheery, happy, ecstatic....none of these words describe me....maybe mailicious, lying, decietful, insane....maybe those do....tell me what you think
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2005 6 February :: 9.27 am
what can i update about.... i have nothing new, nothing happy. just all sad. If only I had the courage to say what i always say i'll do but i dont. why cant i just say eff it and be done with shit. whatever i'm done.
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2005 2 February :: 9.44 am
:: Music: Silverchair - Untitled
Looking at my life
still sick.....i have a major major major headache and it wont stop throbbing...i can hold down food though now, just not alot. i have been holding down the whole regurgitation thing with my food but its tearing the hell out of me....i have work tonight so i'm gonna try to go in but i seriously dont know what'll happen with this whole headache thing. because its to the point where i feel like i need to just pass out but i'm keeping myself awake. damn my being stubborn.
In other news...I've been talking to my old friend michelle...she's friggin awesome. things havent been going well for her and whatnot but maybe with my awesomeness i can make her feel better, and no she's just a platonic friend just like everyone else.
hmm what else.....to those of you out there who want to know more of my views, goals, and outlook on life and what goes on inside my head i shall try to post portions of my thoughts in here it just seems easier for me to do:
My view on life- Well my main view on life is that yes we only have one life to live but that we have no control over what happens...i know you can somewhat change your future by the actions you take but if we are predestined then why make the choices because they are already chosen for us, we may be able to tweak them alittle but not alot. so i choose not to really mess with it at all, if it was meant to happen then it will, if it wasnt it wont.
My goals in life- My goals in life are just what i want to do, nothing really more. I am very family oriented so my main goal in life is to be a great father and husband. what does that mean to me? well to be a great father you have to be supportive, helpful, there for them always in case they need help, and above all else love them. To be a great husband I have to be supportive of my wife in whatever she does, if there are things she needs help on I will be more than happy to help her, and to just love her...that is the reason why i married her.
What I want to do with my life- I know I can do anything I want to. I am fast at learning things and just am naturally smart. yes i may seem like a complete idiot or just not smart but I assure you I can take a test and most of the time pass with flying colors. I'm not cocky its just being smart is the one thing I really know I am. I may play stupid but people really dont know alot of what goes on behind my eyes, and i dont tell people alot of the time because I feel better when I hang around with people who just think I'm there to make them smile and feel better about themselves. I'm not some evil genious or goody tooshoes, all i am is just someone who believes i was put here to help others out. back to the point of what i want to do with my life....i just dont like to be in a repetetive job thats why i dont work in a factory, thats why i dont write the same things in songs, thats why i dont sign my signature or do anything else in a repetetive manner. so all i have to do is find something that isnt repetetive like driving the pizza routes. i never take the same way there.... but i know i can do anything...i just have to put myself to work on it..haha...
well i am gonna head out because of this effing headache...have a great day guys and be safe.
Sincerely,
Leo
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2005 1 February :: 9.28 pm
Hilarious screen shot
check out the homo erotic incest of the mario bros.
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2005 31 January :: 2.12 pm
took a shower. got dressed. talking to joe. getting ready to leave.
wow now thats an update...sweet
JOey
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2005 27 January :: 12.03 pm
:: Music: Silverchair - Untitled
Effing Good Song
Silverchair - Untitled
I'm just another body down
Internal bleeding round and round
And all I can think of are ways to die alone x2
A portrait of my skeletal gain
Left selfish and hungry so feed me the pain
Escape reality with new pain
Then let the cycle start again
And all I can think of are ways to die alone x2
Dream of content
A pain filtered farm
All I can say.....
Dreams are bad
When all they do is leave the truth behind
Dreams are bad
When negativity's a state of mind
Try and listen to that song its good
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2005 26 January :: 12.01 pm
well this is just an update....i have been really sick and cant hold anything down....i havent ate anything in about 43 hours....my knees hurt and so does my shoulder's but eh what the hell can i do....just thought i would tell you all so you wouldnt wonder how come i look like shit....k have fun bye JOey
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