eddy
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::
2007 13 September :: 7.04pm
Fuck you, life.
Fuck you.
4 No way... |
Tell me...
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eddy
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2007 8 September :: 8.05pm
:: Music: John Mayer - Great Indoors
Finally finished harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. It was great, but I'm sad that it's the end. No more waiting anxiously for the next book, wondering what was going to happen in the new addition to the story. *sigh* Time to move on then.
Why am I so unaffected by death? Sure, I cried my eyes out when deaths occurred in the book, but when it happens in real life, I'm strangely detached...
Maybe it's the Celtic side of me....?
Tell me...
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eddy
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2007 8 September :: 2.45am
:: Music: Enigma - Le Roi Est Mort, Vive le Roi!
Welcome to My World
I've come to a strange realization....
I love Johnny Depp's nose.
Yeah....
2 No way... |
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allyson
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2007 6 September :: 12.41pm
:: Mood: crazy
baby
Wow... I can't believe how longs it's been since I actually updated either of my journals. How crazy life has been!
I never talk to anyone anymore and it makes me miss all those sad pathetic days of blink 182 and parties with the group.
I saw james about 4 months ago. He looked healthy. I think. I havn't heard anything from him since then.
I saw Joe yesturday while I was working. He's doing good it seems. Working third shift at family fare and his dad is out of the hospital.
I saw david with his very pretty girlfriend a month ago (yes while I was working). They both seem happy.
Everyone seems good but, you don't talk to anyone like you used to. I have finally been talking to Raych more. The problem was. I am poor and she is altell. I have verizon therefore talking to her takes up my whole 700 minutes that Jared and I share.
I can't believe I am going to have a baby. What is life going to be like? OMG it's so crazy. It isn't going to be just Jared and I. We are going to have a real family, all the time. I mean. Jared has a daughter but... it's different. I try to make it not different. But it is and it always will be. I just can't wait to bring her home and put her in her crib and dress her in all the clothes we got. And of course.. for me to loose all this stupid weight I have gained. A part of me is scared that she will turn out a he. Haha.. knowing my luck I wouldn't be suprised. Anyways.. I don't know what to write. Now that I have internet maybe I will keep this thing updated. doubt it but maybe.
If you want to look at any pictures or anything go to my myspace. You can see how fat I am now. :)
2 No way... |
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rayray
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2007 5 September :: 3.40pm
So it's been awhile since I have had something of some use or interest.
I still work the same shitty job.
Mike and I are doing great. Wonderful as a matter of fact.
I spent a lot of time with my dad, sister and brother (in law) this weekend.
I had a lot of fun.
Mike went to fireworks with my sister, dad and I.
We walked.. Pretty amazing.
Hopefully this time next year, Mike will be a probation officer or whatever he decides to be, and I will be able to not work haha..
I got my first speeding ticket..
I just called to see how much it is going to be..
$86 dollars isn't bad. :)
5 No way... |
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eddy
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2007 2 September :: 1.54am
I've just finally seen Pirates 3. I enjoyed it immensely, but it's left me with a terrible feeling, and kind of a bad mood. It's just left me feeling....weird. Is the only way I can describe it I guess, lol. The ending really bothered me, added with the little bonus clip at the end.
All I can say is, they better make another one and fix it. Or I will be upset. More so than I am now.
Some parts just didn't make sense.
Poor poor Will.
Not to mention they left several things wide open, just asking for a part 4.
I can hope.
5 No way... |
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eddy
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2007 26 August :: 1.54pm
:: Music: Santana/ Josh Groban
And the search continues....
2 No way... |
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rayray
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2007 26 August :: 12.26am
Thursday my friend Katelyn had her baby. I am way excited because I get to see her tomorrow!!
I also went to see Ally and her pregnant belly today.
I cannot wait until she has her baby..
1 No way... |
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box
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2007 23 August :: 12.38pm
Guess who's gettin tickets to see fuckin Megadeth bitches' !!
Yea.. you suck
Tell me...
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kate
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2007 19 August :: 1.35am
:: Music: Regina Spektor
Fotografia, Uniwersytet, Spac.
I never realized how uncomfortable this little box is to type in. It's shoved to the bottom left corner and no more than an inch and half high. The white background is pretty depressing too. I guess it's the perfect atmosphere for sappy Internet blogging.
There are a lot of things I want to do with my life. I wonder about if I'm doing them. I feel like I'm trying hard, but not making it very far. Why am I going to Alma College? I have proved that I'm a city person. I'm a street photographer. I'm going to a school with an excellent photography program.. but the school is in the middle of nowhere. In the middle of Michigan, to be exact. Not that Michigan is nothing. I have grown very fond of my state over the last year. But after living a year in Warsaw, I simply won't survive long in a small town.
It's money. It's all about money. If I had money I would drop Alma and go to study at Griffith University in Brisbane, Australia. If I had money I would buy a decent camera and photoshop. I don't have a camera right now. Can you believe that? I have this feeling of hopelessness without it.. this nothingless. When I was in the UP this weekend, my camera broke. I can't afford a new one. I want a nice one though, not just another digital camera every tourist or mom has. Sometimes I wonder who I'm kidding though. I don't know a damn thing about photoshop, about aperature or other camera technicalities. I feel like I know little more than the average photo taker. I guess that's not important though. What's important is that I take photos because I love to do it. I get frustrated, though, when I think my photo could be so much more, but my camera makes it look pixely or ruins the colors. I try to convince myself it will be better when I start college because I can get a job and save up for things like a nice camera, lenses, and I'll be taking classes to learn all of the ins and outs of photography and exercise my ability. But it's difficult to take a photography course with no camera. And it's difficult to get a camera when you owe the school $1,200 before you can even start classes and I've got less than half of that in my bank account. All I can do is rely on my parents once again, even though they can't spare the money. It only adds to the amount that I owe them. Maybe you shouldn't owe your parents, but I know they don't have much more money than I do, so I feel obligated.
I've been thinking about Poland a lot lately. I always think about Poland. Why is it that life works out in almost painfully ironic ways? My best friend is in Hungary. I know a language that will probably never help me in Alma, MI. My camera breaks a week before I start photography classes. Heh. All I can do is laugh about it. I accept that I need to work harder having circumstances like this.. most of the people I love the very most are all around the world. I will probably only see a few of them ever again, and then maybe only once more. And I know that I'm going to meet many more people that I will cherish.. and never see again. It's something I accept in traveling though.
I wish I could study in Australia. I really want that the most. I wish that the school would be more helpful to me and I wish I knew what my plan was for even the next year, let alone the next four years.
Perhaps I'm complaining. But who looks at this anyway?
God I hate money.
Justine.. you take really beautiful photographs. They make me feel everything at once.
Perhaps I should sleep. It has been a long day.
2 No way... |
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rayray
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2007 10 August :: 4.16pm
:: Mood: Enraged.
If you thought your day was bad..
What needs to change:
While you do work hard, it has been observed for some time that instead of being respectful and helpful to your co-workers, you have been a major contributor to a hostile, judgemental and difficult work environment. Belittling, jabbing comments as well as rough handling of equipment and passing of material are just few examples of behavior that must stop. While you may argue about others not going enough, it is not much different than what you were able to do when you first started. You have also exhibited these types of behaviors with people not even in your work cell.
It was hoped that discussing these issues, you would take an honest look at yourself and look for ways to improve the situation. Unfortunately, right after this conversation, the same negative behaviors were displayed.
Why this is a concern
These types of behaviors are contrary to the values of GRC and undermine the teamwork required to achieve the highest of overall results. Your condescending and hostile behavior towards others is consuming several people's times on these issues and making work difficult for others on a daily basis.
What results are expected
Everyone who comes to work should expect to be treated respectfully and professionally. When issues or problems arise, we should be honest and look for ways to solve the problem and find was to achieve the highest overall result. When new people come into GRC, rather than belittling them, you should be making them feel welcomed and help them perform their job better. This may mean doing more than your share initially until they learn how to do the job efficiently.
What happens next
You need to aware that creating a hostile work environment can begrounds for immediate termination. If we do not see a dramatic difference in your behavior, termination of employment will be the immediate consequence for you.
That is a letter I recieved from the HR Director. Shannon recieved the same letter. So after reading that you'll understand how my day went. As most of you may know I have had a problem with Christine for awhile now. Things have never escalated to the point where she felt the need to tell our supervisor every little detail of every conversation. Im not trying to make myself sound better than her, or be immature and childish about any of this. However, I do not appreciate her jumping down my throat for supposedly copping an attitude. I was simply stating a true fact, and she blew up at me. It is not my fault she misconstrued that situation as well as when Stacy and Shannon hashed it out, after Stacy tried hashing it out with me. I am in no place to point fingers, because I am guilty of being rude, and judgemental. I also do not appreciated Christine telling Shannon when she first started that she better not let me meet her boyfriend because I would try and steal him. Also that I was trying to come between a supposed love affair between Brandon and Angel. I do not know where she got any of that. (For the record, and Im pretty sure all of you realize that I am very at home with Mike. I do not need another man. And I wouldn't be a susie-homewrecker and try to break people up. If people at work are having a love affair, that is their business.) I am not guilty of talking behind their backs because whatever I have to say, I willingly say it to their faces. I have a spine, and Im not going to back down. I don't lay down helpless to be kicked. I may have done that once upon a time, however things have changed.
I do not know where they got that I belittle the new hires, when the only person on the line I have said was slow, was Christine. And thats because she's been there 3 years, and still cannot keep up. When I started working there, I was told the first day by the supervisor that gossip was not tolerated, and if I didn't make rate after a certain amount of time, I would be let go. What happened to those policies?
Also, I am not offended easily, nor disturbed. But when I hear things come from Christines mouth about how her 11 year old daughter wants to get her clit pierced. Or how she found a used condom in her 13 year old daughters backpack. Or how her 17 year old sons girlfriend has a smelly pussy. I am very offended and disturbed. It is uncalled for, true or not, to say those things in the workplace. Especially about your own kids.
And trust me, I have tried telling my supervisor all of this, and it obviously hasn't gotten me anywhere. I am all out of ideas.
Tell me...
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rayray
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::
2007 3 August :: 11.31pm
I haven't posted anything in here for a little while now. Partly because I am completely tapped on anything I want to say. I have done enough communicating lately that I have nothing left to vent. However, the tables have turned. I am frustrated and confused. I feel like I'm being selfish on all that is going on. But its the only thing that feels right. I just wish things were different. I don't even know where to begin.
I dont understand why I can't just forget the fact that she's my mother. I don't understand anything she does. I don't get why I try. I don't get why no matter how hard I try to avoid her, or how many times I say I hate over there, I end up there. I always leave pissed off, or this time, crying because Im so upset. Its because of things I witness, things that are said or things that are done. I don't get why I can't come to terms with the fact that my mother is an alcoholic that smokes pot and prefers men over her children no matter how hard she tries to say otherwise. I have a hard time trying not to care. I do so good for awhile, and then I break because i feel bad. I hate how I can be so cold and act like no one around me exsists, yet Im always worrying about everyone. I always have something big on my mind, and I get stressed out. I honestly, do not understand my mother. At all. I truly do not understand her. And she doesn't understand me. She doesn't realize that she has hurt me.
For instance, tonight I was over there washing my car, and spending time with her, like she has wanted to do for a couple of weeks now, and Joe shows up. Granted I new he was going to come over to get rid of the bat(s) she had. Anyway, she basically ignored the fact that I was there, and made plans for her, Joe and his friend to all go back to his place. After Joe's friend asked if I wanted to come out there, she spoke up and said "oh yeah, you can go if you want". And then rushed me out.
Not to mention the fact that earlier in the week, she invited my brother to go over to my grandma's to pick out what he wanted out of her stuff, but not I. Not the one who she had just spoke with on the phone. She is giving some of my grandmothers things to Joe. She knows that I'd like a few things that belonged to my grandmother and also they were things that she knows I have said I needed for my apartment.. Apparently, I do not rate, but here I go feeling sorry for myself.
I find it quite hard to believe that the only thing that keeps me sane, the one and only thing that I didn't ever think I'd have, is the only thing that makes sense in my life day after day. I have found happiness with him. I love him entirely and I honestly would go crazy without him.
In good news, my brother-in-law is going to be a Cop. (I believe that is what my mother said. It was hard to comprehend anything she was saying).
4 No way... |
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chelthesmell
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2007 25 July :: 1.12pm
Some things just make you realize who your real friends are I guess...
2 No way... |
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rayray
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::
2007 21 July :: 9.03pm
This morning about 4 AM, I broke down.
I lost all control. It was probably for the best.
I had been a wreck all week.
I was being an irritable bitch and was hard to be around.
Im glad that I got out what I had to say.
But more importantly, Im happy that I was able to finally talk to him.
He actually seemed to care.
And he held my hand.
That made me feel whole again.
God I love him.
Tell me...
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box
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::
2007 18 July :: 2.49pm
I would really like to have another party like this
"So the party was pretty bad ass if i do say so myself..
Quite a few people showed up..
Aj, Brenton, Jay and I started playing hack in the barn and all of the sudden the whole party migrated into the barn.. It was pretty cool actually..
Things kept pretty civil till the end up the party when rocko started talking shit to aj because we stopped him from trying to mac on my cool-aid, but its alright, ive known him for years since back when my brother was in middle school.. he just had a little too much captain in him...
Other than that it was great.. lots of old friends, had some good times... shared some good stories and some jokes.. and passed around the liquor.. We had more beer than the nearest bar packed in the fridge and sitting by us in the garage.. 2-30 packs, a 24 pack, 2- fifths, and a half gallon of SoCo.. So there was plenty to go around..
Thanks everyone for showing.. now for the credits..
___________________
Party preperation - Box + AJ
Director - Box
Producer - Box + AJ
Cast And Crew
Box - Box
Aj - Drunk
Gfizzle- David
Beer Guy 1 - Mark
Beer Guy 2 - Steve
Jay - Keepin it real.. Finally got his drivers license..
Brenten - Woodnigger
Mindy - Still sleeping on my couch - drives a saturn
Chel-Unit - Hammered
Bonnie - My Coolaid
Smashly - Not appearing in this party
Erica - always wearing a hoodie... *Shrugs* ive got nuthin
Tony - Showing up late.. only one sober.. other than bonnie
Ramerio - Party Slut.. :P
Rocko - Shortest person there
Keith - Was actually cool for once
Steve - 2 Sheets to the wind
Tanya - Not far behind him
Un-named girl with steve and tanya... - Getting mac'd on by ramerio
Kristin - Drank herself retarded...
Chuck Norris - Walker Texas Ranger
KLQ - Playing a badass lineup
DJ - Yours Truly
Crowd Control - Aj, David, and a Winchester Model 120- 12 Gauge
Cleanup Crew - Whoever is still sleeping in my living room
Beer - Bud light, Miller Light, Busch
Liquor - Captain Morgan, Souther Comfort, Absolute Vodka
Bathroom Reading material - Latest Issue of Summit Magazine"
Yea.. those were good times i tell ya'
1 No way... |
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box
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::
2007 18 July :: 2.39pm
Today, I became so bored and desperate to use the internet. I went to the last place in the world anyone would expect to see me.. a library.. Yea thats right.. Scary huh?
Well As of lately, ive been doing a whole lot of nothing, since i dont have a job as of lately ive had way too much time on my hands. so if anyone needs any work done on their car.. or computer.. or anything of the sort.. Let me know.. I may be starting to work again soon, but am not 100% on that.
Auto repair for half the price a shop will quote.. thats my offer. Or if its something simple and stupid.. im sure we can work someting out.
If anyone wants to just hang out, im almost always home so just stop by..
Tell me...
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eddy
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2007 14 July :: 3.17am
:: Mood: discontent
Why must this world always disappoint me so very much?
4 No way... |
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rayray
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2007 13 July :: 9.13pm
Nothing exciting has really happened in my life.
I'm still bitter, and distant.
I doubt that will ever change.
I'm still with Mike.
And I'm very happy.
I'm currently looking for a second job.
So if you have any suggestions, please let me know.
Carley: I apologize if you recieve the same text from me a dozen times. Service in Sheridan is crap and doesn't send my texts and then when it does, they send like a dozen times.
I sliced my finger open today.
It bled quite a bit, and has bled since I've been home.
Anyway I think I am going to go get cozy in my bed, or on the couch and watch Shooter.
1 No way... |
Tell me...
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eddy
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::
2007 9 July :: 1.19am
Its been a while
I had one of those wonderful dreams last night. Where you wake up, and just have a wonderful euphoric feeling for the longest time.
And as usual, the shitty reality of life and the rest of the world destroys it.
3 No way... |
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chelthesmell
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2007 3 July :: 3.17pm
Fuck It.
And that is exactly why I get along with guys so much better than girls. They are backstabbing bitches.
I'm done.
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rayray
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2007 28 June :: 3.07pm
Apparently cheeseburgers from wendys are worth getting in a big fuss about.
Shannon and I had quite the experience today.
We went in the side entrance to the wendy's parking lot that clearly states drive thru and has arrows pointing the way, and we pulled up to wait our turn and this bone head in a gaudy white station wagon got out of his vehicle and says "you guys aren't going to cut are you?" and I was like "Maybe" and he replies with "The line starts behind me, I suggest you get in it".
However, we were there before he was. (Douche bag).
I was going to cut just to be an ass, but I decided that if I had, he may run into me.
So I just hung back and let him go, and he rear-ended the truck in front of him.
And the guy in the truck was like "You fucking dumb ass! That is what you get for being a total ass hole".
Unemployment and Peoplelink are trying to jew me.
Bastards can suck my anus.
Because I specifically state on my application at Peoplelink I wouldn't work second shift, or for under $8.00 an hour, I apparently do not meet michigans standards to collect unemployment.
So they are going to try and make me pay back the money I collected on unemployment in may.
But I am protesting and they can kiss my fucking ass.
Tell me...
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kate
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::
2007 28 June :: 5.01pm
Leaving Poland
COMING HOME PARTY (they say to put the important stuff first)
Yes, I'm returning to the mother land.. to the United States of America. I've been in Poland for ten months. Have you forgotten what I look like? If so, then you should come to my party and reacquaint yourself. If not, you should still come because I envy your good memory. Here are the details.
Jessica Schmidt's dad's house (on main street)
July 4th
5:30pm - pretty late because we'll be watching fireworks and celebrating
If you don't know where Jessica lives.. call her. Unfortunately I don't have her phone number. Maybe if she reads this note she will be so kind as to leave a comment with the number at which she can be reached. Orrr.. you can call me after July 1st at 696-9764.
I know it's Independence Day and you're all popular and torn between which party you're going to choose, but I hope you can at least stop by for ten minutes.
Do zobaczenia!
3 No way... |
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rayray
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2007 20 June :: 6.26pm
:: Music: Home: Daughtry
My grandmother is being transfered out of the adult care home she is in now.
I am very thankful for that.
I still don't like that she's going to be in an adult care facility, but I suppose ya gotta do what ya gotta do.
I talked to my Aunt Cheryel quite a bit over the weekend.
For about an hour each time actually, and we talked at least 3 times.
Baseball is almost over.
Thank goodness.
I do not know how much more I can take of having to deal with these kids.
They do not listen at ALL.
But I guess quite a few of them are scared to piss me off.
We have a terrible problem with ants.
They are driving me nuts.
They are the little ones too.
Bastards.
Not sure where the little fuckers are coming from being the apartment is really clean.
Anyway, I believe Im going to go clean my car out..
1 No way... |
Tell me...
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chelthesmell
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::
2007 19 June :: 9.41am
:: Mood: loved
Finally Legal
Sunday is probably up there as one of the best birthdays ever.
I'm very happy.
Everything went well.
Family came over, friends came over, Olive Garden was awesome.
I had a wonderful day.
I gambled and lost everytime. Oh well, what can ya do?
Need to shower and beat some kids...bye!
1 No way... |
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