sike-a-delic_grasshopper
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2005 21 November :: 9.06pm
:: Music: Allman Brothers
So I've got the itch.....
I think I figured out my problem. I've got the itch. I haven't been on the road in a very long time. So I'm thinking of going on a roadtrip over winter break. Anyone interested? I'm not sure if I can convince my parents but if I tell them it's a preventative measure to keep me from dropping out and taking up hitchhiking or trainhopping they might let me. However if I find it to be an agreeable way of life, moreso than college, it might become permanent.
You can go ahead and call me crazy now. I'm sure I sound insane.....
8 Bites |
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Angel_Bob
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2005 21 November :: 6.09pm
I know I've probably never told anyone this (my mom just heard about it today and laughed) but here's how dorky my siblings and I are:
Hannah, Nathaniel and I were playing some kind of shopkeeping game loosely based around Chrono Cross. I was the shopkeeper, Buddy was some pet and Hannah was the customer(s).
Once, Hannah came in as a "customer," snuck in the back of my shop and I was audited by an IRS agent (played by Hannah).
And apparently, NORMAL children don't do these things.
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KTHPKC
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2005 21 November :: 5.05pm
Yay for naps!
According to the medicine bottle, Vicodin may cause drowsiness and dizziness. So ha to dad! He thinks that I'm on my deathbed, while in reality I'm just feeling the side effects of a drug. Wooo.
Andy's going insane, it's kinda funny. He and I acted out part of Julius Caesar in the kitchen. He was Cassius and I was Brutus. We're such dorks ;p
3 Bites |
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KTHPKC
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2005 21 November :: 12.49pm
Vicodin; friend or foe
I decided, after much thinking (okay, really it was just sleeping) that I would stay at home this week instead of return to school for just two days. Hell, it'd probably take me half an hour just to walk from the bus stop to Rood! (normally a ten minute walk at the most)
But anyways, I've claimed the couch as mine, the end table is laden with cough drops, water, gobstoppers, my cell phone, and the regular phone. I hafta walk to the kitchen table for my drugs ;p
I attempted to take a shower today, so my hair isn't nasty greasy anymore. That was quite a walk, though, so I'm just gonna hang at the couch for the next few hours.
Oh, apparently dad has started up God Squad again. I don't know who all that goes, but I know that Justin Erickson and his sister go (yay for Erickson!). Isn't it sad that right after we graditate, God Squad starts up again? I DEMAND A REFUND!!! <--that might be the drugs talking
Whee, dizzy!
Edit 1:42
I just threw up. It might've been the jello's fault. I wish that someone was home right now ;_;
1 Bite |
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shinigami
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2005 20 November :: 10.00pm
To all smokers
I hate you.
Hm, that's a little broad. I'll clarify.
I don't hate you, I hate the decisions you make. I may not know you as a person, but I do know something about you. You sit at bars or outside on the curve smoking your fifth pack in a week, drinking your beer (or whatever the hell you drink) and itch for another one. You try and ignore the urge to scratch at it but it's always there, always in the back of your mind. And when the itch gets to be too much, you light up. It relaxes you. But it hurts you. The taste buds in your mouth scream at you in rage, for they have nothing to taste anymore. Your lung protest in agony trying to get a breath of fresh air. Mother Earth looks at you, ashamed that you would be hurting her and her people in such a way. You throw your last empty pack on the ground and rummage through your coat for the other pack that you bought with the last of your paycheck. You light up again and the itch is gone. The people next to you glare and cringe at you, you reek of this stuff. The tobacco companies love you for it and put more intoxicating chemicals into their product, telling you it's the better, smoother brand when in fact they just add more rat poison to it in hopes that you keep smoking and pass it on to your children. They don't care about you, you think, them people in their damn mansions, they don't care, but my cigarettes do, they're the only ones...You blow out the last puff of smoke and finish your beer. That's the stuff, you tell yourself, that's just what I needed. I don't need anyone but my itch. But there, behind you, all around you are the people who love you. They love you so much that they'd do anything for you, but you can't do anything for them. They see what you're doing; they see it and try to stop it. But it's useless, you've ignored them. You don't acknowledge their presence. And when you do notice them, it's too late; they've given up on you and gone. But they still love you and would do anything for you. Why would you hurt them? Why would you hurt the ones you love? They cry when they can't be with you, for you prefer something that can calm you and kill you at the same time. Instant gratification, just what the American people want, right? But it doesn't matter how much they love you, because you will only love your one and only itch.
4 Bites |
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sike-a-delic_grasshopper
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2005 20 November :: 4.44am
:: Mood: antsy
I'm ready to pick up and leave. I like college and everything, but I don't know if it's what I should be doing. What I really want to do is just live in the woods, or on a commune, or travel around, or something equally outlandish. Because it seems like college is simply preparing me for a future I don't want. A future I never wanted and have been trying to avoid and put off. I guess what it comes down to is I'm sick and tired of being part of the mainstream. Because I certainly don't belong here. I mean, I knew eventually I'd get sick of it and drop out, but I thougt I had a few more years. I thought I'd get thru college at least. But here it is, almost 5 am, and I can't get to sleep cause I'm fuckin wired and wishing I was outside. It's what? like 30 degrees out? And I have the window open because I can't stand breathing stale air. You know what? I was never happier than I was last summer at camp. For all the bullshit I put up with, and the long days, I felt like the luckiest girl in the world. Because how many people get to be around horses all day and live in the woods? Even when I had to wake up at 5:30 in the morning I didn't mind all that much. I saw some amazing sunrises. God, I'm practically counting the days till I go back. But I just don't know how much more I can deal with. I'm sick of TV, the radio, cars, etc, etc.... I really just want to live on my own terms, is that so much to ask? I don't see how college is conduicive to that. There is a problem though. If perchance I drop out and go persue this grand scheme, and it doesn't work out, and I want to go back to school I am fucked. Because I'd have to pay for it myself. Which is probably why I'll stick it out. However I will be pissed if I spend all this time and money on getting a degree and then I never use it. Which I probably won't because to use most degrees you have to get a *shudder* real job. So...if you haven't noticed I really don't know where I'm going with this.
It's quite possible this will all be irrelevant by tomorrow.
Good night, or good morning if you prefer.
3 Bites |
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kthpkc
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2005 19 November :: 12.40pm
Okay, so it ends up that my appendix was fine. But my left ovary was bleeding severely. I'll probably be here at Bronson all day and let out tomorrow...tonight if I'm extremely well.
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kthpkc
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2005 18 November :: 9.08pm
Just as Rachel stated, yes...I am going to be a part of the appendix-less cult in a matter of a few hours. Third one of the family this year. Next will be mom.
Tara and I bonded over stolen latex gloves in a room at Sindacuse Health Center. She is seriously the best roommate in the world. I feel bad about all that I've made her go through today ^^" Tara, you're the best!
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angel_bob
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2005 18 November :: 8.20pm
So Katie is having her appendix removed.
Tonight.
Please pray for her.
She's still down in Kalamazoo at Bronson Hospital. I will probably go down there tomorrow, depending on how she's doing, if she's there and how the weather is faring. So if anyone wants to come along, I'll drive.
Oh, I forgot you're all not around here. Well if you want to come, find your way over here or be ready to pay me gas money to come get you.
I love you all.
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1010101
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2005 18 November :: 5.50pm
:: Mood: lonely
Hmm, so suddenly, I feel very lonely. I'm not sure where that came from, but I am. I've made a decent number of friends in the dorm. They're all nice, a little bit crazy, but still pretty clean (kind of like the old group back home, but two years older). I'm still friends with Rachael, who has been the savior of my weekends (if not for her, I'd have moped my way through every single weekend here not doing anything with anyone). Still though, I feel like I should be somewhere doing something with someone right now, but there's no one.
I have some work to do, an essay and a programming project. I can BS my way through the essay, and the program should be pretty easy once I get started. Still, I just really don't want to work right now. I don't want to sit on my ass either, but unfortunately the prospect of breaking in my chair is a somewhat more desireable prospect than researching some racial scientists of the late 19th century (by the way, the topic of race... ....I'm sick of it, no matter what anyone says, it's total bullshit. The difference is in culture, we are not all the same, because we have different cultures, but we are not all different in that our bodies are ultimately of the same basic design. That's all there is to it.).
I've been trying to write again lately. I can't say I've written much, but with any luck, I'll manage to get some work done in that area. Why am I not writing now since I have nothing better to do? Well because I'm not really in the proper mood, and I don't want to force it.
So yeah, to sum things up, I'm bored and lonely. Pardon this sad little entry in my journal. 'Tis not even dramatic and depressing, or happy, fun and sickeningly cute, just kind of blah, and such a step down after my massive (and apparently generally well received) rant on xanga.
Oh, on a more useful and informative note, I'm coming home this coming wednesday, possibly even this coming tuesday ^_^ (provided my bloody writing prof. cancels class like she should *shakes fist menacingly in general direction of Dr. Fernandez*). So let me know if you want to hang out sometime once I have returned ^_^.
Oh, and a bit of a heads-up. I'm quite seriously considering having a bit of a party on my birthday (the 19th of december in case you forgot). I figure it might be a good opportunity for us all to hang out in a big group like we used to before this dreaded thing called college snatched us all away, erm, and before we all kind of became boring and antisocial over the summer (no offense to anyone, I did it too). Oh yeah, and if I do wind up having a party and any bad blood is stirred up, I will insert a sobe bottle in your rectum, broken or whole (I have about 12 of those on my desk right now, and I figure I could put them to good use). So yeah, everyone here, let me know what you all think about the idea.
Hopefully you are all having an awesome start to your weekend.
Va con Dios mis amigos.
6 Bites |
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KTHPKC
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2005 18 November :: 9.04am
:: Mood: in pain
So I'm not exactly a narcoleptic zombie anymore. I just feel like someone stabbed a knife into my innards and has twirled it around. Yeah, fuck it hurts. It started last night when I was up in bed. Believe me, it was fun trying to get out of bed.
All I want right now is a cuddle buddy to hug me and give me backrubs, and my mommy.
And some medication would be highly appreciated as well ;_;
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alastar
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2005 17 November :: 11.34pm
:: Music: A Perfect Circle
The horns and hooves were dancing in headlight haze and then on the hood.
Dents caught fur and blood while paint was scraped and scratched off. A face full of glass cut bridges of noses and lips of mouths and brows of eyes.
What if..?
I couldn't..
This close..
I wouldn't..
I would never let you go.
The foreshadowing was everywhere, we surely must be blind.
We could have prevented this, if only we'd opened up our eyes.
Deer tied down with faces mortified.
Warnings to be careful.
A joke about running into traffic.
Warnings to be prepared.
Are you willing to make the ultimate sacrifice?
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KTHPKC
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2005 17 November :: 1.29pm
So....I feel like shit.
I want to sleep, even though I've slept for more than 12 hours.
I am a narcoleptic zombie.
3 Bites |
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sike-a-delic_grasshopper
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2005 17 November :: 7.27am
:: Mood: happy!
I just finished my paper for English. With 2 hours to spare! Go me! If I get a bad grade on this I will be extremely pissed being that this is the 2nd night in a row I spent writing till the crack of dawn. But at least I don't have anything else due till after thanksgiving....
That is all.
Are you willing to make the ultimate sacrifice?
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alastar
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2005 14 November :: 6.12am
:: Music: Tool
A plan of attack
These clothes have become rags so I'm tearing the threads apart right at the seams. I'll sow them together again with my faults and frays. I will use my mistakes as armor.
Threadbare to chainlink.
Food has become vile and foul and has lost any source of vitality or fuel. Watch the numbers fall
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