�~[:.L.u.M.i.N.e.S.c.E.n.T.:]~�

:: 2004 25 April :: 11.25am
:: Music: none of your bussiness

FOO

The Spice Girls Are Love | Get The Code

:: 2004 25 April :: 11.16am
:: Mood: apathetic
:: Music: I'm just a kid - Simple Plan

I never thought about the universe it made me small never thought about the probelms of the world at all. Global warming, radioactive sites, imperialistic wrong adn animal rights! GO!
Someone has something crawling up their butt. Geez, Amanda and Matt were in thier mood yesterday. It might of been because of me and Corine. I'm glad elanna called this morning and told me though that they were in that "mood" all night and it might've not been my fault.
Well, um, ii guess since it's morning, my brain hasn't gotten used to the settings of today. I'll post later today....maybe

i've spilled my heart for you
-Robert

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LoupGarou

:: 2004 25 April :: 10.58pm
:: Mood: exhausted

Adam's 1st communion thingamabob.
Today was mt cousin, Adam's, first communion and conformation. How come he gets to have both at the same time and not have to do all the crap people at our school have to do? Because his pastor isn't psycho.

Adam's head was covered in oil... *ahem* excuse me.... Crisim or however you spell it, and so when dad when up to get communion he patted Adam on the head automatically and got oil all over his hands. Then he went up to get the host and the priest put it right in his oil-soaked hand. Of course, the host soaked up a bunch of the oil, and what was he supposed to do? "uh... Father, could I get a new one?" nope. He had to eat it. lol.
Not only that but a little earlier the soles of his shoes started melting all over the church floor. It was probably some chemical reaction thing between the wax on the floor and the rubber on his soles, but it was funny watching him take all the nasty clumps of stuff off his shoe, while my grandma was cracking up. She always manages to crack up in church. Once, in a church in hawaii, she started laughing so hard that the priest thought she was crying and she had to go outside to stop people from staring at her.
Anna, my little cousin, was so cute. She was all dressed up and had ribbons in her hair. And she's so cute the way she talks.

After the whole church thing, we all drove over to a restaraunt called Trader Vic's for dinner. It took forever ( as in by the time we left, it had been three hours there.) but the food was ghood and I ate like a pig. It was polynesian-themed, and there were Tiki men everywhere. The thing is, my aunt is weird. In Disney World, she got sad when we went to a Hawaiian restaraunt and left because it reminded her of Nick, my cousin that was killed when he was killed by a car. Apparently he loved Hawaii. However, this place was just as tropical and polynesian-themed as that one, and she had been the one who picked out the restaurant.

A priest named priest Tony, who was also Adam's conformation sponser, came to eat as well. He was actually very cool, by a priest. I think he was gay. lol He was cool. When my uncle asked him if we should say grace before we ate, he said "naahh, we had mass...". Then he ordered a gin and tonic.

Michael, my late-cousin's best friend, came too, and he is so awesome. I seriously think he could do stand up comedy. And it isn't crude jokes he makes either; for some reason he is just very good at doing that kind of stuff. I had met him and hung out with him once before, but that was quite a while ago, and I had forgotten how funny he was. I think he's a year older than me, and I have a hunch he goes to Bellarmine, but I never asked him.

When I got bored from waiting for our food, I would go down to the bathroom, which was huge. It was past a giant stone cow and a few tiki men down a flight of stairs. When you entered you saw a few old-fashioned dressers and then the sinks. There was a whole separate changing room with one of those 3-sided mirrors, and outside the bathrooms was a lounge area with a keather couch, dark wooden table and a giant mirror behing the couch. On either side were a few pay phones. There was even an elevator to get back up.

It's late, and my dad is telling me to get off so I can sleep, so I'll say good-bye for now. He's beginning to snore.

:: 2004 24 April :: 2.58pm
:: Music: echoes in my head

pardon my french you stupid bitch
Well. . . haven't updated in a while.. . . ::laughs:: you guys are lame if you are keeping tabs on my life.
Well, nothing much happened. The usual idiocrity in school and despisement of teenage social wasteland.
I went to the movies with Natalie last night. Saw Home on the Range. Shutup, it's a good movie. I cried in the middle for like 3 minutes....good times.
Hmm....i also participated in thr Geography Bee at school. Final 10 contestants out of 70. Good i guess? I won a balloon and a small candy bar. ::giggles::
Well. . . .i also have a homepage now. It's girly, i know. BUT I LOVE IT.

i've spilled my heart for you
-Robert

P.S: i sent in my 2 dollars for Woohu today!

LoupGarou

:: 2004 23 April :: 6.14pm
:: Mood: bouncy
:: Music: Lies - Evanescence

Look who's back!
Well, dudes, it turns out I'm not leaving this place after all. I sent in the money, and just hope it gets there soon.

Today at the end of the day we had a group come in called S.A.D.D which stands for Students Against Dangerous Decisions or something like that. A lot of the advice they gave us made sense I guess, but we had been talked to about that kind of stuff on the retreat so it wasn't anything new and generally made me feel depressed, damn them! First they told us stories, and one girl even began to cry during it, and then we found out it was all a freaking skit! Stupid people. Then they asked us personal questions and had those who agreed with certain choices move to certain corners of the room, which could be embarassing. And for a marijuana question I moved to a certain side of the room when I actually wanted to get to a different corner, and then Rose and all them went in the middle and created their own "none of the above", which pissed me off, because if I had known they were making that up I would have joined them, but did they tell anyone, noooooo!
*ahem* And yeah. It was better than having to sit through spanish, but oh well. My comma button is being a bitch. I have to hit it really hard for a comma to come up.

I should probably do something productive, like read or work on my story or something, but I don't particularly feel like it. IT'S FRIDAY! Yaaa! There's a dance tonight, but I'm not going.
Stephanie wanted me to go, and I called her this afternoon to tell her that I wasn't coming (she seemed really concerned as to whether I went or not) and her dad picks up and says that she's over at a friend's house, getting ready for the dance. I thought she cared if I went! That irks me somewhat.
Yesterday after school she even sat with me and took out the permission slip and said "Now, let's fill this out for you." Urg! Well whatever. If she's going to act like that, I'm glad I'm not going. Actually, i never even wanted to go in the first place, so i'm happy.
i want to see Queen of the Damned. It got bad reviews, but I want to see it anyway.

Dinner time, I gotta go. bye bye and sayonara!

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silversoldier

:: 2004 18 April :: 10.27pm
:: Mood: tired
:: Music: "Y Control" - Yeahyeahyeahs

parents screw me... eww... incest
I was going to say how crappy my inability to locate myself is really a depressing subject. But then my mom came in, and I couldn't update... so this is all I'm saying.......... yay?

Jessika

:: 2004 18 April :: 1.02pm
:: Mood: hungry
:: Music: tv

I had a dream about a tornado hitting our school last night. When we first went there, you could see the wister and it looked like it was RIGHT next to it in the sky...then everything was flooding and we had to leave by floating on busses. For some reason, Gwen did not leave and I was freaking out about Gwen dying. I went to her mom's work (she worked on a cattle plant O_o...) and was freaking...then I woke up. Yup. I was scared.

Edit: I know what part of it means. Yay!

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silversoldier

:: 2004 16 April :: 8.39pm
:: Mood: tired-ish
:: Music: "Rich" - YeahYeahYeahs

so... I'm back...
Thank you much, Michelli0!
Let's see... I've got 'til May with this brace... Oh.. I got one with even larger hinges, so as I walk around I occasionally knock out my other knee on them...
Um... play rehearsal!! I love our cast (and I'm not specifying how...) But... Kelly and I haven't quite developed the brothers/rivals relationship we need for the play... yeah, I need to work on that... oh... It was really interesting last night. He's like, "So Nick, have you ever done the hard stuff?" And I'm just thinking, oh lord, another one... Well, I told him sure, because every time I'm around iodine I tend to make myself pretty high... I doubt that really counts, though. But he told me he thinks it'd be wicked awesome to have a rehearsal where the cast was stoned... now there's a thought. Molly (our director) was already having the hardest time talking last night (ex: You need to express it like tharg... slarberargan... SHARON!!!)... so we've decided we don't need drugs to get an interesting rehearsal.
My pig and I have been getting some real quality times recently... Yesterday, I pulled out his heart. Today, I cut it in half (it oozed blood... it's not even supposed to have blood anymore... but it oozed... out of the muscle walls, not the normal holes...), and cut open its stomach. Then, after school, I took out the intestines and unwound them (225cm).
Oh... my strange dream (first dream I've had in about a week):
First, I was walking around town (amazing how much one can walk in a dream), and then people started going insane and were doing the general *I'm insane and possibly a zombie act*, so I came home and got on the computer. Then, Lucien showed up and we drove around in his truck (speaking of, I haven't seen him in a few weeks...). And suddenly, I was in a basketball game in a very crowded field house... but I was playing against mentally challenged folks... strange indeed. I woke up as someone was tackling me.

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chuckitatthewall

:: 2004 15 April :: 12.45am

i'm too lazy to seperate this into paragraphs. l
i dont know what the hell is wrong with me! Right now I wanna tell the world to go fuck itself. I dont care about most people that I deal with everyday. Notice the "deal" part. Its cause i dont like them. I am forced to go along working around people. I feel like when I talk to certain people I have to walk on eggshells for fear of hurting their pathetically small amount of feelings. I hate living this dumb life right now. This part is going to sound SOOOOO stupid. I dont give a fuck what you think though. This week I've watched movies about these really cute relationships and like fairy tailish stuff and I wish so bad that stuff like that would actually happen to me. Funny thing is that IT WONT! NEVER! EVER EVER! NOTHING GOOD LIKE THAT WILL EVER HAPPEN! There are several reasons for this. number one is that i have glasses. UGLY! dumb stupid annoying glasses. Nobody likes a girl with glasses. Immediatly they assume that I am a nerd. I'M NOT NERDY! everyone has nerdy moments. I dont THINK that I have that many. If I'm wrong please feel free to burst my bubble. I dont give a shit. I need my bubble to burst if I'm wrong. Thing number 2 is that I'm shy. How can anything good happen if I never know what to say...if i never have anything to say. Maybe its not that I dont have anything to say, but that I'm afraid of what people will think of what I say so I just dont say anything at all. I think thats it. I want to be my self but I'm afraid of rejection. I dont remember the next reason but there are many more. This sounds terrible. I want to kill someone. I know exactly how I'd do it. Yet at the same time I NEVER would. Only out of self defense. I really dont think its worth spending the rest of your life in a jail cell for killing somebody you hate. Then after that its off to hell. The catholic church says that if you are truly sorry God will forgive you. I dont believe that. How can God forgive someone that killed someone else. Anyway, I've decided that I will not spend the rest of my life and after life being punished for one thing. I wish hiring a hit man wasnt a crime... So now I'll describe how I want to murder someone. Beating. Yup. Thats how I'd do it. No cutting or shooting. I'd need physical contact and lots of energy in it. Now that I've scared anyone who reads this.... I try not to fantacise (sp) about this but its really hard when I get pissed. REALLY hard. I suppose I wouldnt be like this if I hadnt been brought up with violence. My parents were always really rough with my sister, Michelle, when they thought she was just a behavior problem. They pulled her hair and hit her..pretty much anything to make her stop being bad. Shes been raped. Yup. SHe wouldnt tell anyone and then she started acting like she used to. She hit my other sister, Mary, and poured a gallon of milk on her. She threw stuff and broke it. She even let Scooter, Jessicas dog who we are dog sitting, get loose. WE FOUND HIM! I dont think Jessica will be happy to find that out. Sorry. My sister gets drunk a lot. Shes lied to my parents. Shes a fucked up dumbass. I hate her. If I ever do any of the shit she does I should hope that someone will beat me.
Wow..i'm tired. bye

Jessika

:: 2004 13 April :: 11.02pm
:: Mood: blah
:: Music: water running

I <3 Mishellle!!!
She is paying for my journal!!! I am keeping the Woohu!!! YAAYYY!!! And Nick...she is paying for yours too. Be happy or I will kick you. Yah.

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6 left their imprint | leave your imprint?

:: 2004 12 April :: 6.51pm
:: Mood: thirsty
:: Music: Beautiful- HIM

yeah, i updated the layout again...feh, lol
well anyways, i think today was odd but good. I finally got to talk to Frans again, i havnt talked to him in almost 3 days ^^ i was soo happy^^ i love him soo much^^ our 1st month anniversary is coming up^^. I talked to bunny today, she dyed her hair again and her boyfriend was over when i called, i dont know him too well, but as long as shes happy im ok with it. i just noticed i know a lot of joes >.>

theres joe B ( bunnys lover)
joey (guard friend)
joey (school kid i know)
joe (another school kid i know)
and of course theres me, joe A ( the A part is an odd story...it goes along with joe B)

well anywhos....i got bored today so i went and downloaded an orlando bloom aim theme....its kinda neat lookin^^ i got in a wierd mood today and took the easter bunny costume, that my mom took home from work, and i put it on and wore it, it looked soo funny...i took the head off and pulled the chest of the bunny costume over my head and made it look like i was like a headless bunny^_^ it was sooo funny.

i also talked to kalyanee today, we watched t.v. for a lil bit than her phone cut off...and she never called meh back, but i guess its ok, i'll talk to her at school. I have french tommorow...oh fun -.- im really good in that class, but some of the kids in there like live to annoy me, and than i have Language Arts the wonderful class with the teacher who happens to steal my most personal notes....right now He knows im gay, and wonderful things about my ex...feh..well i really dont care that he knows, no matter to me..because right now, im in a really good mood, and no one can bring meh down.

I have guard practice once again on wednesday, we're sooooo gonna get yelled at, because i think i was the only one who practiced, but what can they expect? its been 2 weeks without a guard practice.....they should expect us all to be a lil rusty..

well i guess im off to go find something to do.... i'll update this again tommorow maybe,

im out

Joe

yeah i got bored..lol...so i added that in..

:: 2004 12 April :: 2.34pm
:: Mood: bored

weee i took a long survey
1. Nicknames: joe, jojo, shmoejo, yomihura, big blue, joeayyy,
2. Birthdate: 12/20
3. Sex: male
4. Social Security No: I don�t know..
5. Where do u live: cape coral
6. What school do you attend?: Trafalgar middle
7. Siblings and their ages: cindy(15)
8. Zodiac Sign: saggitarius
9. Righty or Lefty: lefty

*********YOUR LOOKS*********

10. Hair color: Brownish blackish
11. Eye Color: Blue
12. height: 5'8�?
13. Do you wear contacts or glasses: none
14. Do you have any piercing: nopes
15. Where do you want more if you do: eyebrow, maybe lip.. and left ear
16. Do you have a tattoo: nope
17. If so what and where: --
18. What kind of shoes do you wear: sneakers

*****************JUST LATELY********************

20. How are you today: umm kinda tired-ish?
21. what pants are you wearing right now? green jean-ish pants
22. what shirt are you wearing right now? grey ck shirt
23. what underwear are you wearing? White red and black boxers
24. what does your hair look like at the moment? odd...
25. what song are you listening to right now? T.A.T.U- not gonna get us
26. what was the last thing you ate? Lunch - - chicken thingy
27. how is the weather right now? rainy-ish
28. last person you talked to on the phone: Um.. alexa?
29. last dream you can remember: one of the ones about Frans ^^
30. who are you talking to right now: Frans, and stephanie
31. what time is it? 2:36 PM

*****************MORE ABOUT YOU!*****************

32. What are the last four digits of you phone #? 7024
33. If you were a crayon, what color would you want to be? erm....baby blue?
34. Have you ever almost died? maybe..i dunno
35. Do you like the person that sent you this? I stole it from another journal..
36. How do you eat an Oreo?: Twist. Lick. Bite. Chew. Repeat.
37. what makes you happy? hehe..Frans and my bestest friends
38. What is the next CD your going to buy? Uhhh.. money?
39. What is the best advice ever given to you?: "watch out"
40. Have you ever won a special award? I dun think so..
41. What are your future goals? Umm.. get married and move outta meh house
42. Do you like to dance? umm
43. Worst sickness you ever had? the flu..
44. what's the stupidest thing you have ever done? Hahaha.. you really think I keep track of all of them?
45. what's your favorite memory? Many
46. If you could change one thing about yourself what would it be? my looks i guess..
47. where do you shop the most? The mall
48. How many kids do you want to have? Um..it depends on how many my future hubby and i wanna adopt
49. Son's name? i dunno
50. Daughter's? i dunno..
51. Do you do drugs? Nope
52. Do you drink? Eh.. once in a while
53. What sport do you dislike the most? golf?
54. What are you most afraid of? Being forgotten or left behind.
55. how many TV's do you have in your house? 4?
56. Do you have your own phone line? nopes
57. Do you sleep with stuffed animals: Yes :D
58. Who do you dream about? Frans ^^
59. Who do you tell your dreams to? not many people wanna hear em
60. who's the loudest friend you have? alexa, stephanie and me..lol
61. Who's the quietest friend? I don�t really have a lot of those
62: Whos you best freind? alexa
*****************JUST QUESTIONS****************

63. Is cheerleading a sport? yep
64. how many licks does it take to get to the center? Why don�t you try?
65. which came first, the chicken or the egg? I could never understand that..

**************** YOU AND LOVE**********************

66. Do you believe in love? yep
67. Do you have a girlfriend or boyfriend? yep
68. Do you have a crush? theres certain guys who i think are cute....but im happy with my lover
69. Do you believe in love at first sight? Yes I do
70: Where would you like to go on your honeymoon? Beachy place..like hawaii^^
71. What song do you want played at your wedding? come with me by special d
72: What's the 1st thing you notice about the opposite sex? erm..
73. Longest crush: feh..
74. Are you too shy to ask someone out? sometimes..
75. Who do u want to spend the rest of your life with? Frans^^
76. Do you find yourself attractive? Not so much.
77. Do you find others attractive? yep..

******************WHICH ONES WORSE***************

78. Making out with Marilyn Manson or Rob Zombie? Rob Zombie
79. Having your tonsils or appendix removed: What's with the appendix and tonsils? I�d rather not have anything removed thank you..

******for girls abour guys (im a guy who likes guys so ha!) ********

i dont like girls in a sexual way so im only fillin out this one ^^

80. Boxers or Briefs? dont matter ^^
81. Long or short hair? All depends
82. Curly or straight? Also.. Depends
83. Six pack or muscular arms? Both..
84. Good or bad guys? A mixture of the two
85. Hat or not Hat? No hat.. maybe hat tho
86. Ears pierced or not? I like piercing
87. Tan or fair? -ish
88. Dimples? Sure why not
89. Stubble or neatly shaven? Sometimes a little stubble cant hurt.
90. Rugged or sporty? either or
91. Studly or cutie? Both
92. Accent or no accent? i love meh lovers accent! ^^
93. Glasses? dependa
94. Smart or dumb? Smart
95. What sport would he play? Dun matter

*******PICK ONE: THIS OR THAT?************************

118. Lights on/off? Off
119. Do u like sun or rain? sun
120. Mickey D's or BK? bk
121. Do u like scary or happy movies better? Scary
122. Backstreet Boys or NSYNC? Nsync
123. On the phone or in person? Person
124. Paper or plastic? Paper
125. Sausage or pepperoni? Both
126. Summer or winter? Winter
127. Root beer or Dr. Pepper? Dr. Pepper
128. Glass half full or half empty? Full
129. Tape or DVD? DvD
130. Cats or dogs? kittys!
131. Mud or Jell-O? Mud? Who eats mud?
132. Vanilla or Chocolate? chocolate
134. Day or Night? Night
135. Cake or pie? cake
136. Silver or gold? Silver
137. Diamond or pearl: Diamond
138. sunset or sunrise: Sunset -

*******************YOUR FAVS*********************

139. Color: blue, red, green
140. Food? i like a lot of foods..
141. Fast Food: Wendys
142. Candy? All
143. Ice Cream Flavor? chocolate chip cookie dough^^
144. Sport to watch? colorguard?
145. Fav type of music: All kinds
146. Radio Station: I dun know
147. Song: Dun feel like typing them
148. Band: Ditto
149 Number: 7
150. Fav actor or actress? orlando bloom, johnny depp^^
151. Fav. Month? january, august, december
152. Store? Dunno
153. TV Show? dunno..
154. Scent? i have quite a few..
155. Teacher? Ms. russell
156. Board Game: Clue
157 Saying? You Like It!

****************HAVE YOU EVER********************

158. Loved somebody soooo much it makes you cry? Maybe.
159. Smoked? Nup
160. Drank? yeah
161. Ever gotten dumped? Uh huh
162. Broke the law? nope
163. Ran from the cops? Nope
164. Stole something? nope
165. Tried to kill yourself? No
166. Made yourself throw up? nope
167. Been in love? yep
168. Made yourself cry to get out of trouble? Of course

3 left their imprint | leave your imprint?

:: 2004 11 April :: 3.19pm
:: Mood: bouncy

Happy Easter^^
well its easter, and i got a whole pile of candy^^ im happy,

though i was stuck at church all day ( feh..) and i wish Frans was on, i love him sooo much and i want to talk to him. *thinks* maybe i should go out and get a international phone card *nod nod* that might work ^^; than i can call him and speakie to my lover.

im off school tommorow *sigh of relief* the only reason why i kinda like going to school is to talk to my friends. Im really gonna miss some of them next year, feh, chances are im gonna cry or somethin like that on the last day...im so emotional sometimes..but than again i cant wait til high school because it means that i can drive soon, and all that good stuff^^;

well i told another one of my friends i was gay today.....she found it cute for some odd reason, and wants me to be her best gay friend and go shopping with her.....i dont mind that really*nod nod* i like to shop ^.^ though i want to be just a normal friend, i dont see why my sexuality really matters in becoming a best friend...but i dunno, i'm not gonna dwell on it...though she made me think about something...she was asking me about why i keep being gay such a secret, and why dont i tell more people...i really should but im kinda afraid....because of all the junk that happened about robert telling people he's bi, i dont wanna end up hurt that much emotionally like that. I just dont think i could put up with it, roberts strong when it comes to taking insults and things, i cant stand being called those things really, it makes me angry and sometimes even feel like cryin. I really should set the record straight and come out with everyone....i mean i think the whole school thinks im bi, because of awhile back, when i thought i was..but now im fully gay....and i dunno...i just freeze up when i tell people things like that, i dunno why. Im just very weak emotionally i guess....

Robert. if you read this, i want you to know that you did something i could never have the strength to do. I hope you have the best of luck finding a guy or girl.

And Frans, i want you to know, theres not a day when i dont think about you. i felt soo bad that i could talk to you today, on easter, i need to somehow make this up to you.i love the card you sent, it was soo sweet ^^. i cant wait til im old enough to get outta here and be with you. i love you soooooo much. i was going to call you today, but it was too late when i finally got the phone card and everything. :sniffle: i dont like that 6 hour time difference >.<

well im off to bed to think about all these things on my mind.

byes all,

Joe

I love ya Frans ^^

5 left their imprint | leave your imprint?

:: 2004 10 April :: 11.10am
:: Music: Salt in our wounds-HIM

hey!
well i finally updated my journal, things have been pretty good^^ i went to the movies with mojo yesterday, we saw home on the range....my god...never again >.> but it was nice to get outta this prison called home and hang out with one of my bestest friends.

disregard all the dumb things i posted in the previous posts about being mad at people and wanting to kill someone...because all is good now, i got a bf, schools not too bad, my friends are all doing good, im just happy ^^ though theres been some problems with a certain few friends of mine, but im pretty sure its all good now.

I got to hear my bf's voice a few weeks ago, he called me all the way from holland, i love him soooo much^^ and his voice is soo cute. I love ya Frans! ^^

i went to the mall and got easter piccies a few days ago cause my mom works there, i almost like knocked out the bunny with my rings, lol.

X-treme rocks! we got 1st place in our lake howell competition with a score of 66.7! woo!

and at the championships we got 5th but we still did really good, we got a score of 71 point somethin.. which it like 40 points higher than our score in the beginning^^ I love guard^^

well anywhos im outta here for now, i'll update laters,

Joe

I <3 Frans 4~~~>