spud
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2015 9 March :: 11.21pm
going in for knee surgery on wednesday. i'm intermittently anxious about it. i know that a lot of it is out of my hands. i just need to make sure that i'm doing what needs to be done on my end of the bargain, and let the rest of the chips fall where they may. because it doesn't do anybody any good to freak out about things that i have no control over anyway. just do the best i can with the things that are in my control, which are relatively few.
also, i've started getting into fancy sodas now. i realize it's kind of bullshit for me to pick up a new enthusiasm every time i turn around, but it's something i enjoy doing. i like finding things to be enthusiastic about. it's a lot healthier than moping. and sure, i can see how in a way it seems dangerously close to being a craft beer enthusiast. but that was something i always liked doing. it was the least 'alcoholic' drinking i ever did. drinking just to get drunk, you look for anything that gets the job done. sampling things to find flavors you like is a very different undertaking. it was fun looking for different beers and wines to try. why not sodas? i used to look at the labels to find the highest alcohol content. now i look at them to make sure there isn't any. it doesn't seem to me to be any sort of 'trigger' (i despise that term, but it has its uses). but this disease is subtle and cunning, so i guess i'll just be watchful. as long as i'm honest about it, and there doesn't seem to be a problem, then there probably isn't one.
so i got one of these at the orlando airport:
i'm really trying to find something like it that i can get around here, because i thought it was super tasty. the molasses comes on strong, so i wasn't a fan at first, but the malt aftertaste was awesome.
also, there's this high-schooly thing going around the internets where you spell your name with band names. i'm putting it here, because i don't like putting stupid crap on my facebook. so, thank you woohu, for being my perennial repository for stupid crap.
Cake
Head East
Radiohead
Incubus
Spoon
Toad the Wet Sprocket
Old Crow Medicine Show
Pink Floyd
Heart
Elbow
Rush
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godessalthena
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2015 6 March :: 7.12pm
life is just excellent
I love my family so much
and my puppies
and my apartment
and just.. yes. this is living. ya'll should try it
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godessalthena
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2015 3 March :: 4.02pm
meeting my little in an hour. I stayed home today because bjorne was sick this morning. I have felt off all day and I'm not sure why. of course I'm nervous, just as nervous as I get when I meet anyone new.. but it's something else. just this sense of dread? maybe apprehension? I'm not really sure.
I've been feeling excellent lately. I have avoided thinking about all the negative and sad things that usually occupy my mind. and even now I'm not thinking about those topics, but that familiar hollowness is present.
either way I'm excited to meet my little. I hope it goes well!
1 comment |
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joeydomina
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2015 3 March :: 3.18am
Holy jeez. I still have this. I live!
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godessalthena
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2015 28 February :: 12.07pm
:: Mood: ecstatic
i love dates. not that we called it a date.. but.. that was great :)
i haven't had someone pay for my stuff in so long. it was so cute.
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godessalthena
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2015 27 February :: 9.14pm
help
I'm drowning
1 comment |
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spud
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2015 26 February :: 12.30am
been experiencing ALL OF THE FEELS lately.
do not like.
i mean, it's good that i'm feeling stuff. that means i'm growing emotionally/spiritually/what-have-you. but it is still uncomfortable.
going to bed. hopefully tomorrow will be a little smoother. cheers to growth.
4 comments |
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spud
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2015 23 February :: 10.13pm
Rome wasn't built in a day...
... but it did burn down pretty much overnight.
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godessalthena
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2015 21 February :: 5.24pm
:: Mood: curious
:: Music: the indiest shit your earholes have heard
.... steppin out (bjorne) ....
so, a creative bug has hit me, and i have written my first song. please keep in mind this is a rough version and is subject to change. at this point i only have the lyrics, but i think i know what key i want to write it in and am working out how i want it to sound. i am, nevertheless, filled with an exuberant amount of pride at this. and while i may feel extremely exposed, please enjoy:
Read more..
thoughts? ideas? please be kind!
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godessalthena
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2015 20 February :: 5.20pm
bought my first new car :3
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moomoo
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2015 19 February :: 5.56pm
Pregnancy is way harder then I ever thought, bringing life into the world is so hard. I'm finally out of the sick stage, longest 3 months of my life. Now I'm starting the back pain stage. Had another trip to the hospital last week for bleeding again, but she's still doing good. Just wish my cervix would get in check. So ready for it to be June so I can meet Ella. I have so much stuff for her already, shes going to be so spoiled. I'm so proud of how much my husband has stepped up around the house and to help me. I couldn't ask for a better partner during pregnancy. So ready for June :)
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godessalthena
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2015 19 February :: 8.49am
forgot my phone at home today >.<
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godessalthena
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2015 18 February :: 9.52pm
totally an adult now. just bought my first newer vehicle!
and I love it!!
she is small, black and quiet, just like my soul... bahahaha /emo
today has been excellent. I am going to just drive everywhere. I'm so stoked gonna drive around with my guitar and some paper and a pen and just get inspired, man.
like a fuckin Subaru commercial, only its a Chevy.
2 comments |
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godessalthena
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2015 17 February :: 8.36pm
drunk drunk drunk
wrote my first song today :)
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godessalthena
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2015 15 February :: 8.58pm
I have things I want to say.. but how do I say them
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