godessalthena
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2014 19 November :: 5.01pm
I bet I could teach jackie chan a thing or two.....
and tha sun got brighter then
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godessalthena
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2014 18 November :: 9.12pm
today has been quite a roller coaster
2 touched my hand... |
and tha sun got brighter then
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godessalthena
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2014 16 November :: 10.57am
GWAR has been hands down my favorite concert I've ever been to.
and now the fire in me to start a band has grown to a raging inferno.
TOTAL DOMINATION
and tha sun got brighter then
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godessalthena
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2014 13 November :: 9.29am
my growing pains are always from growing apart.
I don't even know what to do. should I do anything? when is it right to fight for something and when isn't it?
I suppose these answers are all inside me. I just need to try and find them.
and tha sun got brighter then
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godessalthena
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2014 12 November :: 7.33am
sometimes you just need a reminder that there are still racist fucks in the world.
damn that guy was fucking creepy.
1 touched my hand |
and tha sun got brighter then
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godessalthena
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2014 6 November :: 6.31am
we got processing the Sus saga.
I wear a lot of my emotions on my sleeve, but the feelings that Sus envokes are much more private. I'm not sure why I can only cry about it when I'm alone. I'm not sure why I need to put on a brave face.
the final section we will process is me, 24 to current. not a whole lot in the past two years. hopefully we'll be done soon :) haha yea right
and tha sun got brighter then
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godessalthena
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2014 4 November :: 11.09am
i cannot wait until i'm done with college.
these fuck faces are trying to say i plagiarized a paper. i would never do something like that. EVER.
so i call my academic adviser and he says that it's probably that i didn't cite something properly. i have been writing papers and turning them into these stupid fucking robots for two years and have never once had an issue with this. i know how fucking APA guidelines work. I know how to properly cite my sources.
fuck you, ashford university. fuck you constellation. fuck you turn it in. fuck you grand canyon university. fuck online schools. fuck plagiarizing assfucks that made this all possible.
fuck "higher" education. what a fucking joke.
2 touched my hand... |
and tha sun got brighter then
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godessalthena
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2014 3 November :: 2.33pm
I'd have to say the party was a success, most people canceled, but the ones who came were the most important anyway <3 and I didn't even want a big party, so I got my wish without having to cancel.
i wanna say more, but I don't really want to type right meow, so.. more to come later!
and tha sun got brighter then
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godessalthena
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2014 30 October :: 9.38pm
I just want to be held and told it'll all be okay.
I feel so alone. and disgusting.
2 touched my hand... |
and tha sun got brighter then
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godessalthena
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2014 28 October :: 8.02pm
sometimes everything just feels so blah, you find yourself in bed at 730, texting people who are not on the same page as you, feeling bleh about them.
it's just so much bleh, blah, meh, eh... who cares?
19 credits left at school. work is slowing down (I'm almost catch up). ospe time is soon. so not into that this year.
this weekend needs to be over right stay now
1 touched my hand |
and tha sun got brighter then
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godessalthena
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2014 25 October :: 6.34pm
I really miss drugs
and tha sun got brighter then
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godessalthena
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2014 23 October :: 10.37am
canceled my hair cut yesterday since it was it was my last opportunity to be alone before Mike gets here. I'm already exhausted just thinking about all the social interaction I'll be having while he's here.
then I think about the rest of my life, and wonder if maybe I should try to be more social or risk regretting these years as wasted since I'm young and free currently.
and then I think "fuck it" and remain antisocial, because a lot of the time being alone is just so fantastic. I think the part I love the most is nobody expects me to talk. it's just so nice, not feeling pressured to participate in a conversation. not needing to think of something interesting or relevant to say. not worrying whether I'm being boring or sounding stupid or something. I really hate talking. I like listening. hate talking.
I'm not even sure why I hate it so much. I haven't had a negative experience involving me talking in quite a while, so what makes me dread it so much? no clue. but here's to hoping someday it goes away!
3 touched my hand... |
and tha sun got brighter then
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godessalthena
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2014 20 October :: 11.43am
I don't think its really as bad as all that.
when it rains it pours though.
and right now I feel like I might get caught in the undertow
and tha sun got brighter then
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godessalthena
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2014 16 October :: 8.13pm
ALEXZ FIXED MY COMCAST!!!
she is magic I fucking swear. I am so fucking jazzed I could dance
fuck this is awesome
and tha sun got brighter then
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godessalthena
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2014 16 October :: 9.54am
after my appointment I went home and started to sketch the drawing she asked me to make a month ago. needless to say I hated everything I drew.
I need to update my style. I don't even watch anime anymore, and I feel like my drawings are so childish now.
I am really excited for after work. I might leave early for mental health reasons but I seem to be managing the sad pretty well.
we went thru 18-21 last night. those were probably some of the worst years of my life. I had successfully forgotten about a lot of the things that surfaced in the session. I honestly don't know how I survived. those were dark days.
and tha sun got brighter then
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godessalthena
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2014 14 October :: 11.57am
"just because you're small doesn't mean you aren't important"
and tha sun got brighter then
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godessalthena
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2014 14 October :: 11.01am
this job is an endless fountain of misery for me. I hate the system, I hate the bureaucracy, the fake asinine entitled fuck heads in the department. I hate all the stupid fucking meetings.
I am so bad at what I do. and by bad I mean I'm extremely average. and that destroys my self esteem but I also can't find enough fucks to give to actually try to do better.
everyone gets kudos, except me. because I don't really fucking try. cuz what will it do? I don't have new revolutionary ideas, I don't see the problems in the machine, so no matter how hard I work, I'll still get a shitty review. so what's the point?
no one gives two shits about me here. I'm just a number. a warm body.
fuck LEAN methodology. fuck lms. I'm fucking done
and tha sun got brighter then
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