oh what marvelous things

1 | glimpsed a bat with butterfly wings

:: 2004 1 June :: 12.04pm
:: Mood: b0red..
:: Music: adams song

i never thought id die alone. i laughed the loudest whod have known? i traced the cord back to the wall. no wonder it was never plugged in at all. i took my time, i hurried up. the choice was mine, i didnt think enough. im t0o depressed to go on. you'll be sorry when im gone. i never conquered, rarely came. 16 just held suh better days. days when i still felt alive. we couldnt wait to get outside. the world was wide, too late to try. the tour was over we'd survived...

summers been 0ok.. nuttin much.. mias been at jessicas and um.. we went to winn dixie yesterday dressed like wiggers.. me and jessica were "hollerin" out the window to these girls that passed by and this one sk8 boarding kidd matt.. he was makin fun of us.. meanie. um. sunday i think it was.. bailey and me met chris and mike at the sk8 park and we were gonna go ice skating but we didnt have money$$ so we threw rocks at eachother instead. um.. kayla goldman came over on friday and spent the night.. we were crackin on catherines boots.. combat. lol kayla.. um.. today hillary ad lacey are coming over and were gonna go to the movies.. again for the 2nd time this week, i went with bailey last time and we saw shrek 2 again lol. today we're gonna see raising helen.. with my favorite actress.. kate hudson i think hillary looks like kate.. a lot. in the eyes.. and ive been puttin a lot of periods latley.. <<< see?!?
lol.. well.. lacey just tryed callin me but since my celli sux she couldnt hear so ima go call her back!!
-x0x [[since calli took my -x0]] lol love ya girlie!!
wuvv yall!!

Rina	:: 2004 31 May :: 10.19pm a boy with blue eyes and a hunger for destruction is luring me to the dark side of the force. there's no saving me now. glimpsed a bat with butterfly wings

Lisalion816

:: 2004 31 May :: 5.15pm
:: Mood: eh...
:: Music: New Found Glory...the new cd is good :)

ok. Haven't been doing much of anything lately. On Saturday i went over to jessica's house and we had a LOTR marathon. It was great...we didn't make it to the third movie though because we were up all night playing the two towers PS2 game. IT WAS AWSOME! we had been playing it before a little but we finally beat it. ahhh victory. i love it.......

I went to go see the movie Troy on friday night with christina and alecia. oh man oh man oh man! Brad Pitt basicly sleeps naked in that movie....oo the hotness.

Orlando Bloom is in the movie as well....there are no words that can describe his hotness. He is just beautiful! i will have to buy that movie...^_^

alright, im supposed to go and sleepover at alecia's tonight along with christina. and i should have left 15 min ago and i still need to put on my face and tame my hair. arg...

later...

3 | glimpsed a bat with butterfly wings

dreamiecloud

:: 2004 26 May :: 3.02pm

DOODE!

summser doesnt feel like its here.

1 more day guys.

then i have to clean my house. go shopping for france clothes, take a math test, and register for my D/E class.

oh you know my summer will be oh so fun.

guess what, if i do take my math class i have to miss the 2nd day of school for the exam.

maybe the first too, im not 100% on that.

blarghkfg

Rina

:: 2004 26 May :: 2.10pm
:: Mood: obligated
:: Music: ride - the vines

"The intricacies of your fates are meaningless."
so. i took the lamest exam ever yesterday. it was my art exam. sigh. man, we were supposed to draw our sculpture and then describe it, explain why it's there, etc.

describe it?? you're looking at the fucking picture i just drew ms roeder!

ah, so retarded.

anyways. my math exam was yesterday, and im crossing my fingers, hoping i passed. it became a mantra in my head about half-way through the darn thing. let me pass, let me pass, please, at least a c..

graahh. and today was the ceramics exam. guess what it was. the sculptures. i swear to all things holy that i will come back and blow those things up just for the hell of it.
i got to use the chisel and hack mortor off the tiles. and you know, clean them with a sponge. fun was had all around.

biology exam. i just looked at it and said "i dont want it."
the entirety of the exam was of everything ms freis has neglected to teach us. honestly. ive never heard of anything on that thing. the only thing i have remembered from the test today was seeing the word 'glucocorticoids' and thinking is that an actual word? it was a traumatic experience to say the least.

1 day of school left, fuckers.

and now everyone wants to do something with me this weekend. sabrina-sleepover thursday. lyn & carrie-sleepover thursday and then go to heather's party on friday, which is a sleepover too. sydney-sleepover here on friday. melissa-go bowling with her and her youth group. sunday, im pretty sure i have to do something with my mom..

and my guitar-playing skills are improving. which is cool. i've been messing with my amp alot. and pure undiluted lameness, my friends, lies within my inability to find something useful to do with my digital camera. i ended up taking pictures of myself. and i solarized them. rah.

summer is upon us. what on god's green and burdened earth will i do? seriously. i have a month to be with my friends, and them i get to be shipped off to another country. fun.

oh yea, i remembered what i have to do on sunday. church.

ta.

lovethehibiscus

:: 2004 24 May :: 10.25pm
:: Mood: happy
:: Music: echo - incubus :D this is my favorite song..ever

if we took a holiday...
we were driving home
my belly full of osaka japanese steakhouse yummy food
grinning about the way dinner turned out and how i have the best family
the windows were down
blowing that cool 80 degree florida breeze in
madonna's 'holiday' playing on the radio
i was singin in the wind
remembering the words from when i was around 4/5 and i loved madonna and i would sing 'cheerio girl' instead of 'material girl'
and that moment..was the happiest moment of the day for me :)

andie*

lovethehibiscus

:: 2004 24 May :: 10.12pm
:: Mood: happy...remembering..
:: Music: 11 am - incubus

second sister
i can still remember once riding my bike down to your house cause i was scared of the thunderstorm
i was there everyday it seems, like my second home
to me, it was a second home with my second sister
looking back now, i smile and laugh at the silly things we did to have fun
how many times did we talk til the battery on my phone died?
how many times did i have to refrain from eating so i wouldnt have food travelling with my laughter?
we'd chat about school, boys we liked, and how we would show the troublesome boys in the neighborhood who is boss
but then something changed
we both met new friends and talked on the phone to one of them til the phone died
i feel so distant now
like im peering in to the bubble of your world except im not really in it
although i know that i still have my second sister

andie*

Lisalion816

:: 2004 24 May :: 8.18pm

Alright.

Went to Frank's party with Jessica saturday night. i thought more people were going to be there but there was a pretty good turn out. sadly, Adam was not there. i know, its horrible. Justin showed up later though. i played pool with him and we talked and i had fun. hes soo nice to look at. still had a thing for him from last year. oh well hes nice eye candy...mmm lol

at jessica's party we were just hanging out. frank and joe showed up for a while and then decided to leave an hour or so later. i guess there were just too many girls for them. i like joe, hes a nice/funny guy. geeze, now that im done with school i wish i had hung out with these other people! i should have talked to frank more often....hes such a nice guy.

at like 10:30, cindy, jess, linda, and i went to go see Shrek 2. it was great! i have to see it again...:) got home around midnight, couldn't sleep blah blah blah.

i miss jon. he gives good hugs. talked to him online sat and he can do something this week which is a mirical. he never gets out...works way too much.

ok not much else to write about.

Julie, if u can do something ever...call me! im so bored these days....your fun! ^_^

later...

4 | glimpsed a bat with butterfly wings

:: 2004 24 May :: 5.18pm
:: Music: out of control hoobastank

calli burnt me the ho0bastank. thanks sweetii t0daii was really fun... it was a g0od day. l0l. x cept catheryn was talkin m0re shit.. grrr. my br0 and his gf mite get back t0gether. yay. my sister wh0 takes me t0 nifty places. l0l
nerd herd-- tater t0t
wat happened to us> we used to be perfect...

:: 2004 23 May :: 12.47pm

Beach dayz ; flip fl0pz - bAthin SuiTz
tAnk TopZ - BlAzIn BoiZ * NicE TaN :: h0t DayZ :
WaRm SAnd ~ VaCa Time ; LiL Fightz *
Drinkin bEeRz -->ParTyin @ NiGht -
SuN s0 Bright - m0on aLl hAzy
_Hell Yea Babii _
sUmmer `04 iZ g0nna bE KrAzii
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
/xXx/ReMeMbEr WheN..
ReMeMbEr WhEn BoYz HaD �.cOoTiEs.�
WhEn FrIeNdS aLwAyS �-lIsTeNeD-� 2 u..
wHeN ((dReAmS)) wErE uNsHaTtErEd
& [[wOrRiEs]] WeRe ::fEw::
WhEn ReCeSs WaS tOo |sHoRt|
aNd LiFe WaS *2* �---LoNg---�
wHeN DeCiSiOnS cAmE .:eAsIlY:.
wItH ((nO NeEd)) 2 �..bElOnG..�
wHeN :.:StOrKs:.: DeLiVeReD bAbIeS
aNd *PaSsIoNs* WeReN't sOo o�sTrOnG�o
wHeN [[fRiEnDsHiPs]] WeReNt bRo|KeN..
RiGhT wAs .RiGhT. & wRoNg wAs :WrOnG:
WhEn (((BaD))) tHiNgS dIdN't HaPpEn
OnLy _sKiNnEd KnEeS_ bRoUgHt ::TeArs::
aNd tHe �_NiGhT . LiGhT_� iN OuR rOoM
((.QuIeTeD.)) aLl oUr FeArs
wHeN :.dEcIsi0ns.: wErE s0|VeD
bY [eNi mEaNi . mini m0]
wHeN �.�b0yS�.� wErE sOoO !yUcKy!
& *gOoDbYe* MeAnT OnLy tIl ::ToMoRrOw::
WhEn Ur ClOtHeS DiDnT �..mAtCh..�
& *r E a L* fRiEnDs DiDn'T p|A|r|T
tHe ((..FuN..) wEnT oN *4eVeR* aNd
NeVeR LeFt a _BrOkEn ... HeArt_

Rina

:: 2004 22 May :: 12.08pm
:: Mood: weird
:: Music: the rasmus

she's fading away, away from this world
it was my birthday.

i got an ELECTRIC GUITAR. and an AMP!
it's a black washburn x-40! what! and the amp is a dean markley.

i also got paint shop pro 8! and animation shop!! that fucking rocks.

and there is only 4 more days of hell!!
life is good.

Lisalion816

:: 2004 21 May :: 10.49pm
:: Mood: tired

alright then. Graduation went smoothly and was great. I dunno, what do you say about graduation? I walked across the stage decked out in all my honor cords and suprisingly, i wasn't nervous at all. I thought i was going to be shaking and out of it bc im just that type of person who hates getting up in front of people.

everyone arived at techo/graduation, early..and hour and a half which is really stupid if u ask me. y they wanted us there so early i will never know. alright, so before hand we were all hanging out and i got to talk with jon! oh how i have missed him this year! the best guy friend i could ever have! he couln't go to gala bc his dad just came down so that sucked major. but hes going to christina's party as far as i know which is awsome bc i can see him again. im going to miss him sooo much.

anyway, back to graduation. after we started walking out of the statium, i waited for Jon bc he held my keys for me. i was greeted with the biggest hug i have ever recieved from anyone! it was a good hug. memorable for sure. and i was like, "i love you jon" and he said "i love you too lisa" and then i felt a few tears and he said don't cry bc then i'll start and i can't cry i said i wouldn't. so he hugged me again and headed out. ooo how i will miss him. we've been through so much and had a blast. i dont know what i would have done with out
him. :)

i can't still can't belive that i am now an official graduate. i mean i still feel the same and its just surreal i guess, i dunno....indescribeable.....

After i came home i started to get ready for gala. But first i had to convince the parents that..well...ummm...maybe i should open my present now since i am official and its just not cool to tourture someone with wondering what they are getting for two more days...he he. Soooo... i got a big box...well kind of. In it is what i am typing on. Yup thats right, a Dell inspiration laptop! now my dad is up on all this stuff so he thought it was neccesary to get me the proffessional one with all the high tech stuff. I LOVE THIS THING!

i have wireless capeability, with a DVD/CD drive so i can now burn both and watch the dvds. its the coolest thing. he even special orderd this special kind of charger that is compatable with the european hz and volts, since its different.

oooo yeah....

so, gala. i had fun. i hung out with jessica, jamie, christina, and cindy.:) they had all kinds of stuff set up...casino in the teachers lounge, ping pong, pool, air hockey, foos ball, jousting, and other nifty stuff.

after a while i kinda left jamie and christina to hang more with jess and cindy. we got to talk alot and goof off a bit and it great. it was getting hot in the cafeteria and gym so we went and sat outside....right by Adam.^_^ i didnt talk to him though bc he was on the phone with someone, despite that it was 3 am. i want to know who he was talking too...hmm...'

oh well bc its not like anything is going to happen. im just admiring him. he is very goodlooking. and nice, smart, funny. can't forget that since i know all too well that looks aren't everything. alright so anyway i might get talking to him at franks party if he decides to show so that should be fun...striking up a conversation....not knowing what to say...not a good conversation starter.

alright...JULIE! thanks for the comment..lol um can u leave another with ur journal address?? i forgot the link...its on the other computer and that computer is now gone soo...i had to find all my favorite websites again and everything...oo fun. kk ..:)

Later..........

:: 2004 20 May :: 6.10pm

i hate everything about y0u, why d0 i love you
hey hey..
im at the library with bailey and meghan.. g0d i l0ve her.. l0l. baileys 0n the c0mputer right beside me d0in some kinda rep0rt.
ne wayz.. t0daii was a blast. 0ur team went 0n a b0wling trip thingy. kayla, rachel, chris, lacey and me were 0n 0ne team.. and i w0n the first game and chris w0n the sec0nd. we came back, g0t free lunch and then watched m0vies and signed yearb0oks.. [[and no calli, me an chris didnt d0 anything.. and y0u can g0 hed and read his yearb0ok and what i wr0te in it.. ill sh0w y0u what he wr0te me t0o.. i have n0thing t0 hide.
i g0t b0ut a million signatures.
6 dayz 0f sch0ol!!!!
hey kayla we 0n f0r t0m0r0? call me and tell me whatz up iight?
ne wayz..
dude,
i cant wait til eight grade,, dam itll be fun. im unpluggin mah cell if i d0nt wanna talk t0 that pers0n.. i need mah al0ne time s0 d0nt think i just hate y0u. l0l.
devin ian and j0e are s0o0o funni.. devin had his hair like elvis t0day, ian had his part in the middle and j0e had his part t0 the side.. talk ab0ut an abercr0mbie m0del "w0ot w0ot" l0l. 0key d0key well.. "thats all i g0t t0 say ab0ut that" -- f0rest gump
l0l
muah
~~x0x~~

1 | glimpsed a bat with butterfly wings

lisalion816

:: 2004 20 May :: 3.58pm
:: Mood: stressed

ok. Graduation tonight at 7:30. Im just a little on the stressed side! couldn't find anything to wear, don't know where im supposed to park, how im going to get there, am i driving? Do i take I-75 or what?????? All this confusion is making me NUTS. I look like a big purple balloon im my grad gown. and who decided that the hats had to be square?? Who wheres a huge square on their head, honestly! Not the most fashionable look.

Going to GALA after...starts at 11pm ends at 6am. im going to be SO tired. Found out Adam is going so its all good.^_^

Sam hates me now and i could care less so i finally told her off last night. She was telling me how i think, feel, and act. Yeah, right, like she can control me. Fucker. So anyway she was saying how i "fall in love with every guy" which is so NOT true, saying that im in love with Chris and Ian and im sorry but....NO. And im Jealous of her...or some bs like that. What is there to be Jealous of?? that HUGE ass thing on her face that she is trying to pass of as a nose? or is it that im jealous of her whoreish ways? Fuck that. Shes a bitch.

I actually saved the convo....

AlwaysSJ1231: so i heard u asked chris to do something with u last saturday night, is that true?
Buttercup12780: yeah y?
AlwaysSJ1231: i am shocked
Buttercup12780: y?
AlwaysSJ1231: b/c u never call a guy and ask them to do something with u
AlwaysSJ1231: what did u ask him to do?
Buttercup12780: thats not true
Buttercup12780: i asked if he was busy thats all
AlwaysSJ1231: yeah it is, u'd never call josh or ian or ne guy for that matter, u always wanted me to call and then me to go with u
Buttercup12780: my friend and i were bored and were calling everyone
AlwaysSJ1231: and why did u bring me up by asking if i hated u
AlwaysSJ1231: u dont have to go through chris to find out
Buttercup12780: bc it seems like u've been avoiding me and i dunno why everyone has to relay info 24/7
AlwaysSJ1231: welll u can ask me
Buttercup12780: then whats wrong?
AlwaysSJ1231: and well i am still hurt about what u said sorry sue me
AlwaysSJ1231: u just seem jealous that him and i are really close
Buttercup12780: what did i say now to upset u seems like i always say something
Buttercup12780: yeah that was when he was avoiding me
Buttercup12780: like a moth ago
AlwaysSJ1231: u still seem jealous and i dont see why u are
AlwaysSJ1231: b/c him and i are best friends?
AlwaysSJ1231: u know what u said but yet u deny it, so i am not saying it again, i am tired of repeating myself over and over
Buttercup12780: i dont know y u think im jealous bc im not i dunno who tell u this
Buttercup12780: yeah ok one thought lasts a MOMENT not a LIFE TIME
Buttercup12780: there is a DIFFERENCE
AlwaysSJ1231: well when it consits of u only being my friend b/c i have a boyfriend
AlwaysSJ1231: IT DOES LAST A LIFE TIME
AlwaysSJ1231: UD BE PISSED TOO
Buttercup12780: I NEVER SAID THAT
AlwaysSJ1231: yes u did
Buttercup12780: i could care less if u have a bf or not sam
Buttercup12780: so GET OVER IT
AlwaysSJ1231: when we went for a walk around the neighboorhood u said that
AlwaysSJ1231: why would i make it up
Buttercup12780: not those EXACT words
AlwaysSJ1231: yes those exact words
AlwaysSJ1231: i wish i would have taped recorded u
AlwaysSJ1231: god
AlwaysSJ1231: news flash u get over it u obesss over guys way too much and u need to get over it that u dont have ab/f
Buttercup12780: im not going to put up with this any more bc u twist my words and then avoid me and assume things ....and NEWS FLASH for you im not obsessive and i could CARE LESS about a b/f ....im LEAVING the COUNTRY!
Buttercup12780: are we clear now?
Buttercup12780: GOODBYE!
AlwaysSJ1231: U ARE TOO OBESESS U FALL IN LOVE WITH A GUY AT FIRST SIGHT
AlwaysSJ1231: IAN, JOSH, CHRIS ALL OF MY GUY FRIENDS
AlwaysSJ1231: i didnt twist ur words lisa
AlwaysSJ1231: i know what i heard
Buttercup12780: i never "loved" or even liked ian or chris in THAT wat
Buttercup12780: y
AlwaysSJ1231: yes u did
Buttercup12780: no thats what U THINK U HEARD!.
AlwaysSJ1231: dude everyone knows u obessed over all of them
Buttercup12780: WHATEVER
Buttercup12780: everyone??
Buttercup12780: no just shit that u told ppl that isn't true
Buttercup12780: I CANT STAND UR CRAP ANYMORE SO GET OVER UR SELF AND STOP FEELING SRY FOR UR SELF ABOUT NOT HAVING ANY FRIENDS ITS NO WONDER U DONT HAVE MANY! U DRIVE THEM NUTS WITH ASSUMTIONS!!
AlwaysSJ1231: actually u dont know how many friends i have so dont go assuming crap
AlwaysSJ1231: i dont assume jack u do, so whatever and yes i do despise u with a passion not hate despise get it right i dont need friends like u
AlwaysSJ1231: so stay away from me got it
Buttercup12780: ok, lets get this straight. obviously, you dont understand the point im trying to get across, so lets make this clear. you are just an idiot who doesnt know forwards from backwards and im thinking that anything that extends beyond the reach of metaphorical speaking will not get through your thick skull.
i do not like you because of your boyfriend. i could really care less about him and i do not obsess over guys. this assuption that i love chris and ian is completely ludacris. the very thought behind it is absolutely absurd. i dont believe i have done anything that would result in a hate of that porportion, but frankly i dont care seeing how u twist my words and tell people things that are untrue. and i know by sending this im to u, you will most likely tell everyone what a horrible person i am and cut out everything you say so i seem like the bad person in this. whatever bc you will always make things turn out the way you want it to bc u can't stand having things not go your way that is just the kind of person you are and i have accepted that since you can't accept the fact that you don't know what the hell is going on or what you are talking about

Rina	:: 2004 19 May :: 10.38pm :: Mood: extremely sad "i will cut out their eyes and turn them just enough so they can see their mutilated faces" ... go team. i cried. it is silly, i know, but i still did. 3 \| glimpsed a bat with butterfly wings

Rina

:: 2004 18 May :: 9.13pm
:: Mood: blech
:: Music: seether

you reek of frustration; it curls off of you like smoke.
weekend = ridiculously cool.
me = sunburnt.

and my birthday is in 2 DAYS! WHAT!

it happens to coincide with graduation, but that will not take my happiness away. woo.

lisalion816

:: 2004 17 May :: 1.57pm
:: Mood: bored
:: Music: i wish i had some to listen to...

Alright then. Im at my moms office killing time before having to pick up carina from school. Oh what fun lemme tell ya.Julie called me today while in "math" class since she was bored......pressuring me to write in my journal so i figured i might as well while im stuck here.

On wednesday Julie didn't call back so i didn't end up doing anything with her but its ok bc i figured her dad was being his usual self. instead i went out to eat with jessica and then jamie joined us and we saw "13 going on 30" which i must say is a very cute movie. After that ,around 7 ish, i went over to jessica's to try on one of her skirts to see if it would fit for graduation. It did so now i don't have to spend any more money. ..well i need to buy a top but whatever. We ended up playing ssx on her PS2...i have the second one but this one is way better...so on friday i decided to go out and buy it. Anyway, we just hung out and i got home around midnight.

Thrusday i went to go pick upmy cap and gown which was fun i guess....how much fun can u have waiting in line? oh well....it wasn't that bad and after jessica,jamie, christina, cindy, alecia and i went to Perkins for breakfast so it was nice to talk to everyone again.

other than that i haven't been doing much....its weird not going to school everyday or at all even. It just feels that im on a break or started summer early and i'll be back next year......but i wont! i will be freezing my butt off in Sweden. Call me crazy i know but i can't wait! sooo sick of this god forsaken state....honestly, who wants to live in Florida?

ok then...have to pick up the sis....

Later....

3 | glimpsed a bat with butterfly wings

lovethehibiscus

:: 2004 16 May :: 10.08pm
:: Mood: drummin on the computer desk
:: Music: muse - time is running out

church bells
i heard the church bells ring
yonder over the hill to the south

the eerie clang of the rusting bells
travelled over the dreary dusty land

infiltrating through the open windows of your car as i stared bleakly out at the moon

the sudden noise broke through the silence
and went out through the other window

i just wanted to open the door and run away
for you werent speaking and it was killing me

my eyebrows furrowed and spelled disappointment
while my eyes went icy blue under the pale moonlight

i tried making conversation but much to my disappointment the only response was the wind and the echoes of the empty land

how long will we go like this?
before i start screaming from my heart

with a sudden halt, the silence hit the dashboard
as you briskly stopped infront of my house

slowly i got out and bent down to say goodbye through the window
halfway you sped off in to the distance

leaving me in a cloud of dust at my lonely front gate
listenin to the faint, far away church bells

andie*

:: 2004 13 May :: 9.28pm
:: Music: aaliyah-- miss y0u

sick 0f ppl writing shyt n n0t leaving therrr name.. wtf?? i guess their t0 scared im g0nna kick thier ass.. thatz c0ol w/e
im listening t0 aaliyah.. shes dead. w0w.
what if i died t0m0r0? w0uld y0u regret ne thing? w0uld y0u remember me f0rever? w0uld y0u break d0wn? c0me t0 mah funeral? talk ab0ut me? feel me beside y0u?use mah name in vein? beleive in heaven?talk t0 me al0ne in y0ur r0om? l0ok at things and find that everything has s0mething t0 d0 with me? feel guilty ab0ut ne thing y0uve ever sed? think and tear ab0ut the g0od times we always had? w0uld y0u feel mah presence just n0t in the physical? w0uld y0u miss me? would i live in y0ur meme0ries f0rever? w0uld you remember my death? 0r celebrate my life?
im y0ur angel