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niofalcon
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2004 17 June :: 12.31pm
"I should get that memory drink to keep me from forgetting things... damn what's it called!?"
i love susan.
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niofalcon
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2004 17 June :: 12.10pm
Darwinism as applied to atypical thought patterns.
I spent a good hour or so going through multiple emails from friends in which they were debating politics and rights and wars and freedoms of our country and it made me realize this: we have too much time on our hands if we can debate politics with novelistic lengthy email exchanges. This is not a democracy, at best it is a semi-socialist dictatorial oligarchy masquerading atop a vast capitalist empire of an archetypal conglomeracy which imprints on our brains a consumeristic attitude and an illusion of choice. We have the right to vote, but that's like throwing pennies into ponds trying to create tidal waves. I'll keep my opinions of America to myself and worry about my own two feet and square feet and the surrounded miles around me. We have too much time on our hands to be arguing about politics when we can be spending time with our loved ones. We should try to understand them instead of trying to understand the meddlings and affairs of political figures. I think life should be spent trying to understand life and not the decisions of our leaders, we should focus on evolving mankind and progressing as a whole, selectively weeding out anything that gets in the way of evolution. Technology and science will pave the way. Wars and killings and abortions will filter out inhumane humans and after the attrition only the "braniacs" will be left. As they say, only the strong survive. I'm sure the fires will wipe out those scrutinzing and criticizing each other.
i love susan.
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niofalcon
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2004 17 June :: 12.41am
Week one.
They say that the old must be demolished to make way for the new but I'm not getting any older (same face same face). And so I paved paradise to put up these new concrete walls, and from a third story window I look north from the heart of city illuminated for everything around except me.
i love susan.
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plainmornings
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2004 16 June :: 7.18pm
blah.. finally cut my friends list down, getting rid of the people who didn't pay to keep their journals and the people who i have not talked to in over a year. Its funny, it seems as if the only two people who still regularly write in their journals are Lauren and Amanda.
i need college to be here now :0/
6 lovers |
i love susan.
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niofalcon
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2004 8 June :: 1.40pm
:: Music: guns n roses - live and let die
Memoirs of a Manic-Depressive Pt. (uh, I forget)
Me and Joe would joke around with each other and he would say
"You got the gun up to your head yet? I know I do."
Being bipolar fucking sucks, if it were a growth on my body I'd take a knife and cut it out, it's like having an ailment that you have to be careful not to provoke, or holding onto a bomb and being careful not to set it off. I remember listening to this song back in 7th grade, on the bus as we headed to John Pennekamp park in the keys, tending to a broken heart over Valerie, a girl who I had an insane crush on back then. What I didn't realize at the time was that I actually broke her heart, and it made me think about how many hearts I've carved out obliviously and which nasty brush-offs and dirty looks from girls were actual desperate pleas for attention. I was flipping through photos and I guess I lost that picture of me and Valerie on the boat, she was wearing a bikini and yeah we were 12 but damn she was so frickin' hot.
1 lover |
i love susan.
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niofalcon
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2004 8 June :: 11.42am
Strength Beyond Strength.
I'll take a few bricks to the head and I still won't beg for mercy.
i love susan.
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niofalcon
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2004 8 June :: 11.15am
:: Music: guns n roses - patience
The Double Negative Sobriety Test.
A few months ago I walked into a bar alone and ordered a few tall ones in a desperate attempt to silence the entire world. That night would be my last night of giving in, that night I said fuck it, I don't care, I'm staying sober. And if it wasn't for you, then it was for me, I guess now you want someone who was almost like me, maybe you're becoming almost like me while I become something you were and wanted... But fuck it, you know what I want? Someone who is addicted to me, and addicted to agony, who will squeeze my hand when a line is placed before them and give me that look of should I do it? should I do it? will you do it with me? I don't let these things get in the way of my life anymore, in fact I want someone who will do for me what I'm doing for you, because what good is love without the promise of hope?
i love susan.
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niofalcon
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2004 7 June :: 9.18pm
The Juliet-Mark | Jean Grey-Logan | Rosa-Kain | Ruby-Dicen Complex.
"I'm just sitting here with my boyfriend."
She says I should take her to prom because we can pass for teenagers, you know I'd get full sleeves just because you think it's mad sexy. She says call next time before I come over, but I tell her I love sneaking up on her.
(I'm a sucker for that just-got-out-bed look)
i love susan.
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sendmemoney
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2004 7 June :: 5.49pm
:: Mood: amazed !
:: Music: ed rush and optical with skibadee and shabba - live at one nation
man ... if this isn't paradise i don't know what is ... free vegetables and incredibly cheap coca-cola ? all i need now is my amazing boyfriend and a few of my best friends and i'd never leave ... but as it is , even cheap medicine is not enough to keep me away from them . too bad , too . haha <3
i love susan.
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niofalcon
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2004 5 June :: 12.08pm
My children's names, if I ever have them.
Boy - Tobias Rafael Cabezas
Boy - Azrael Cipher Cabezas
Girl - Alexis Marie Cabezas
Girl - Lucianna Fernanda Cabezas
Now to find a wife who thinks these names are cool.
2 lovers |
i love susan.
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niofalcon
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2004 4 June :: 7.43pm
The Futon Decision.
"Well I have a pretty big back seat."
"You shouldn't be telling me that."
i love susan.
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niofalcon
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2004 3 June :: 11.33pm
The 11 Hearts Construction Paper Cut-outs.
1. Sgt. Sudia standing with me as I was terminated.
2. Sgt. Geraghty as I shake his hand and say "Thank you for everything."
3. Oliver's instillment of hope.
4. Covering for Jared, his wife had their baby one month early.
5. Reuniting with the Italian Crew.
6. Kevin's appreciation, for helping him get laid.
7. Keeping in touch with the other two Dans.
8. Linder, likewise.
9. Me and Danny realizing that we cannot lose the band.
10. Luliya's smile.
11. The absence of Ruby, her handiwork, only in picture.
i love susan.
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plainmornings
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2004 31 May :: 2.58pm
its funny how time and time again everything repeats itself.
i leave August 17th.
i still feel as if there are some holes that need patching up. things shouldn't ever be left this long unresolved... really, thats how you lose the people that you care about the most.
to end an old life, to start a new.
i love susan.
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sendmemoney
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2004 25 May :: 12.11pm
:: Mood: eating
:: Music: ludacris - game got switched
asexualityrocks (11:50:12 AM): i love manny
asexualityrocks (11:50:16 AM): like all of my friends are in love with him asexualityrocks (11:50:17 AM): and i love it
susanis a winner (11:50:33 AM): haha we always have like the same conversation .
asexualityrocks (11:50:45 AM): i know!!!
susanis a winner (11:50:56 AM): it's like "Hey what's up ?" "rolling a blunt" "smoke it with me !" "come up here , you guys can stay in my room " "alright , we'll come up tomorrow"
asexualityrocks (11:51:02 AM): its like: susan: So manny pot pot pot ?? and manny: SUSAN! Pot pot pot pot !!
asexualityrocks (11:51:27 AM): susan: pot is so amazing!! manny: What are you saying? i'm too high to understand you
i love susan.
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sendmemoney
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2004 24 May :: 1.49am
:: Mood: bored
:: Music: shuffle on my winamp playlist
Instructions :
Step One : Put all your MP3s on your winamp playlist , press shuffle , and record the first few lines of the first twenty songs .
Step Two : Find better things to do so you can stop doing fucking stupid online journal shit .
1. 586 - So , so you think you can tell Heaven from Hell ? Blue skies from pain ?
2. 629 - I saw an old man on a street . He was in a dumpster looking for something to eat .
3. 249 - Good morning , sunshine . Awake when the sun hits the sky .
4. 266 - All alone in a broken world . Finding a new place to start .
5. 529 - Para bailar la bamba , para bailar la bamba se necesito un poca de gracia .
6 . 301 - It's yet to be determined , but the air is thick , and my hope is feeling warm .
7. 656 - There is a steel train coming through . I would take it if i could .
8. 407 - So what's the point ? To stay away ? It hurts the same .
9. 146 - Oh , as I sit under this weeping willow tree , pain and sorrow is all I feel .
10. 420 ! - When you have no light to guide you , and no one to walk beside you , I will come to you , ohh , come to you .
11. 583 - Oh I'm so glad , you know , they've all just gone home , cause finally we're here alone at last .
12. 237 - It began in Africa-ca-ca-ca-ca . It began in Africa-ca-ca-ca-ca.
13. 704 - Con unas ancias locas quiero verte hoy . Espero eso momento en que escuche tu voz .
14. 735 - Niggas ain't fuckin with this , originalis . Beats ain't bangin like this .
15. 531 - Turn it inside out so I can see the part of you that's drifting over me .
16. 865 - Do you believe ?
17. 218 - Saw it on the television . Heard it on the radio . This , in truth , is not yet the end .
18. 128 - And here's to you , Mrs. Robinson . Jesus loves you more than you will know . Oh-oh-oh .
19. 459 - Let me be patient . Let me be kind . Make me unselfish , without being blind .
20. 12 - Chelsea , baby , let's run away to some third world country .
1 lover |
i love susan.
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