Brad
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2004 16 November :: 6.49pm
:: Mood: Bored Bored Bored
:: Music: Skid Row - Remember Yesterday
Not another rant, it's ok.
Bored as fuck. well, for the past few days i've been stranded here in the apartment. no gas to get anywhere. no money to buy anything..nothing. i just sit my ass on this computer, listen to music and play halo2 and thats about it, oh and i watch lots of movies. wish i had some friends to come visit me. heh, anyway, i figured, its too hard to hold together a band with all the needed members. so now, im looking to start an acoustic band. i think its a pretty good idea. but yeah if you know anyone or you yourself are interested, get a hold of me. i thought it might also be cool to have like a girl sing in it too, that might be rad, but i dont know. just hit me with some idea's people. well, im going to talk to nate probably tonight about having a Halo2 party this weekend. see what he thinks, then ill post it and whoever wants to come can come. we'd set up a few tv's and get some more copies of halo together. but yeah, tell me if you're interested. i'd like it to be like the one's i used to have at my old house. with everyone just killing eachother and having an awesome time. so thats what i think about that. ill catch you all on the flipside..
Bradley
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rere12389
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2004 15 November :: 9.50pm
i don't even know what to say anymore.
~Re~
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Brad
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2004 15 November :: 7.12pm
listen, there's shit i need to say. the shit with jay, its between me and him. i shouldnt have said anything, if i didnt, i wouldnt feel like such a shitty friend. i understand why he's upset with me, i deserve it. but now, everyone is talking shit about me. i dont deserve that. i dont see why there is anyone but jay bringing me down. i know i did some shit i shouldnt have done, and i regret it. but everyone should just keep out of it. now, i dont trust anyone. i cant. if you're my friend and you honestly havent said a thing about me, then maybe i can still be your friend. but otherwise, i want nothing to do with you. i want best friends. i the couple people i had, all i can do is be loyal to them now. if there's even a chance. but i just want to know who my friends are. thats all. and if you are my friend, be happy for me, dont doubt me. my past is nothing more than my past now. gah, im losing my train of thought now...thats all i guess. bye.
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BigBen61
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2004 13 November :: 12.33am
This just in: Ben Birk is actually more pathetic then he looks.
Well tonight i was working the all nighter, and i was asked out by a 14 yeard old girl who i didn't even know the name of. I've come to the conclusion that the only girls who like me are the middle school girls and a few freshmen who just like me because i'm older or the girls who just plane don't know me at all(thats why they like me). I'm just in a big big slump, i haven't been in a relationship in a full year and it just gives me this feeling that i'm girl repelent. As much as i want a relationship i'm not going to just go out with someone because i don't want to be alone, or else it would just be an empty pile of nothing and that would just make it all worse. Bah i guess i'm just in a big hurry to find that one girl. Well i'm done whining for now, someone please make fun of me for how big of a blubbering baby i'm being right now.
By the way, if you read all that you've added 2 pathetic points to your ownself total, and if you cared then its 4.
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rere12389
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2004 12 November :: 7.57pm
:: Mood: bleh...
:: Music: Rain by Breaking Benjamin
Take a photograph,
It'll be the last,
Not a dollar or a crowd could ever keep me here,
I don't have a past
I just have a chance,
Not a family or honest plea remains to say,
Rain rain go away,
Come again another day,
All the world is waiting for the sun.
Is it you I want,
Or just the notion
Of a heart to wrap around so I can find my way around
Safe to say from here,
Your getting closer now,
We are never sad cause we are not allowed to be
Rain rain go away,
Come again another day,
All the world is waiting for the sun.
Rain rain go away,
Come again another day,
All the world is waiting for the sun.
To lie here under you,
Is all that I could ever do,
To lie here under you is all,
To lie here under you is all that i could ever do,
To lie here under you is all,
Rain rain go away,
Come again another day,
All the world is waiting for the sun.
Rain rain go away,
Come again another day,
All the world is waiting for the sun,
All the world is waiting for the sun,
All the world is waiting for the sun.
~Albino Bob~
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Brad
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2004 11 November :: 12.02pm
i finally got my license back. now im back on the road. except yesterday my car decided to bite the dust and not start for the whole damn day. but i had someone fix it. hopefully it wasnt a one time fix and it'll stop working again today. i really need to get it looked at and tuned up.
when i look at how everything is right between everyone...i think, wow, if our old selves from at least 2 years ago seen how we are now. they would kick the shit out of us for being so stupid. this group used to be all about friendship, we were the closest group of friends that nothing could split apart. i hate to look and realize how fucked up everything has gotten. one reason as to why things change so much...every year new people just invite themselves into the group. people that most everyone doesnt like, just because one person is friends with them...they're all of the sudden a huge deal in this group. i dont feel as if there is one big group anymore. now its seperate little groups secretly talking bad things about all of the other little groups. then some gang up and attack another group. i was part of what i thought was pretty much the origional group for the most part. a few new additions but thats ok, everyone got along. but now, shits just gotten worse over little things. i feel as though the members in my group(not saying its MY group) dont talk enough about their feelings towards eachother. and im a prime example of that, i fucked up. i know i did, but im doing now everything i can to repair this hole in our friendships. i feel as though the group is so busy talking shit about other people that we dont realize what we're turning into. we're not caring about true feelings, we're just worried about making fun or pissing off other people that really mean nothing to us. i dont want this group to fall apart. the group i consider myself a part of has a select few in it. the other people i accociate with are just friends, nothing more. and i dont want my true friends confused by that. but i know one thing, ive learned my lesson not to say something that shouldnt be said about people i know i dont want to lose. i will never find two more guys friends that i am so much alike. no one will ever compare to them. if i lose them, its my fault as of now. if there's anything i can do to get things normal, i will do it.
but now, im going to leave, think about what ive said. goodbye.
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Brad
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2004 10 November :: 8.23pm
I'm sorry, please forgive me. Believe me if you could.
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fadingfallenstar
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2004 10 November :: 6.58pm
I'm falling apart.
I don't care if you want to hear me bitching, skip over it if you don't want to hear it.
I hate how my dad doesn't love me.
I hate how my mom loves me, but is too damn miserable to ever show it.
I hate that my brother hates me.
I hate that I lost almost all my friends.
I hate that I let people get to me. Everyone keeps asking me why I let them get to me. If I had a reason, I'd make it stop. I have this, "fuck everyone, I don't care what you think" attitude that is entirely too fake. I do care what people say. I can't stand all these people hating me. I can't stand people talking about me.
These past three days I have been breaking down for no fucking reason. My mom yelled at me, I went in my room and cried. I walked to the middle school after school, I cried. My dad called me a slut, and so many more words, I cried. I don't cry. What is wrong with me?
I hate how this easy life is so hard for me to take. There's so many people that have it a million times worse than me, yet here I am falling apart.
When I heard Sam didn't want him at her party I couldn't help but be angry. How all these people can just turn against someone for NO fucking reason kills me.
The fights that exist shouldn't.
I hate how I have NO ONE to turn to. My dad was drunk, like every fucking day. And he was screaming. He isn't the funny, haha, drunk. He's the violent, screaming drunk. I had to go somewhere. I went through my cell phone. I have 30 or more names on there. And I couldn't find one fucking person to turn to. Not one. And half of the people aren't my freinds anymore.
I hate to be hated.
I hate that I don't understand.
I don't want to be the sarcastic bitch anymore, yet I don't want to be the little depressed girl. I don't know what to be.
I don't get why you're all such terrible friends. I really don't. What is your reasoning? How hard is it to just be there and be understanding? My group of "friends" is by far the saddest excuse of friends I have ever seen. When it comes down to it none of them are there for you.
None of you can have a mature conversation. You have to call eachother names and be assholes to eachother. Just talk it out. If you are so sick of drama, stop creating it.
All I know is that if I had enough guts I would have ended this all tonight.
And with reading this, I know nothing will change. You'll just bitch, and I'll be your next topic for your lame ass gossip discussions.
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rere12389
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2004 8 November :: 8.46pm
:: Music: Pup by the W's
i am a good girl.
X the ones you have done:
( ) I have been drunk
(x) I have kissed a member of the opposite sex
( ) I have kissed a member of the same sex
( ) I crashed a friend's car
( ) I have been to Japan
( ) I rode in a taxi
( ) I have been in love
( ) I've had sex
( ) I've had sexual relations in public
( ) I've shoplifted
( ) I have been fired
(X) I have cut myself on purpose
( ) I have smoked pot
( ) I still smoke pot
( ) I've had a 3-some
( ) I've snuck out of my parent's house
( ) I have been tied up. (yes...in THAT way)
( ) I pissed on myself
( ) I have been arrested
( ) I've made out with a stranger
( ) I've stolen something from my job
( ) I've celebrated New Year's in Time Square
( ) I've gone on a blind date
(x) I've lied to a friend
( ) I've had a crush on a teacher
( ) I've celebrated Mardi-Gras in New Orleans
( ) I have been to Europe
(x) I've skipped school
( ) I have thrown up in a bar
( ) I have purposely set myself on fire
( ) I have eaten sushi
(X) I have been snowboarding
(x) I have been happy with myself
( ) I have met a movie star
( ) I had sex in a pool
(x) I went to a dance with someone of the same sex
( ) I've bungee jumped
( ) I have been to a pop concert
( ) I have dated someone for over a year
( ) I sold naked pictures of myself
(x) I have been in a car accident
(x) I have slept in the nude
(x) I've eaten cheesecake
( ) I've had jury duty
(x) I've hated someone without knowing them
( ) I have given oral sex
( ) I have recieved oral sex
(x) I've shot a real gun
( ) I've ran around with my trousers around my ankles
( ) I've had sex with someone within a week of meeting them
( ) I've done ecstasy
( ) I've gotten my ass kicked
( ) I've been caught smoking
(x) I've worn boxers
(x) I've milked a cow
( ) I've got in a verbal fight with a teacher
( ) I've cheated on someone
( ) had sex with a best friend
( ) Lied one time in this survey
( ) Lied more then once in this survey.
( ) Lied to a friend you see everyday
( ) Kissed a person that has a g/f or b/f
( ) Used ice cubes as a foreplay accessory
(x) Wasted time filling this out instead of doing something productive
( ) Have nude pics of yourself on your computer
( ) Walked across 8 lanes of interstate highway
(x) Have been to camp
(x) Have read a book(s) more than one time
( ) Have eaten cat food
( ) Have been pulled over by a cop
( ) Own porn
(x) Am a Republican
(x) Likes classic movies
(x) Own a kitty
(x) Carried a lunchbox in high school
(x) Buy gumballs to watch them swirl in the machine
( ) Likes to be dominated
(x) Likes to drive with the windows down and the music turned up
(x) Eats PB &J for breakfast because there's nothing else
see! i'm not naughty whatever you may think.
~Albino Bob~
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rere12389
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2004 8 November :: 6.24pm
School Play
The school play will be december 2,3 and 4 thats a thursday friday and saturday. 7:00 pm and tickets are $7.00. if anyone is interested please buy your tickets from me!!
~Albino Bob~
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rere12389
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2004 7 November :: 8.51pm
:: Mood: meh...
:: Music: The W's
my weekend...
well megan FINALLY decided to visit me this weekend. i don't think she could have picked a worse weekend to come if she tried. i was soo busy on saturday and not to mention in a really pissy mood. he parents were being retarded as always and wouldn't let her stay the night or see anyone BUT me because they thought we were gonna do something. right... i don't think they remember who i am or something. so yeah. all we did was go to my church function which would have been really fun if she wouldn't have decided to pick fights with all the black kids because "they're poor and shes soooo much better then them" gah...
anyways, i have rediscovered my love for swing music. *listens to the W's* i love Justin for burning me this cd!!! hes the coolest. haha.
~Albino Bob~
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Brad
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2004 4 November :: 11.47pm
:: Mood: not too bad
:: Music: Skid Row - Remember Yesterday
Great fucking song.
Things are starting to look up people. i guess i just got an offer from Mr. Hazel to live with him. that would be awesome. but i'm gonna talk to him tomorrow and see about all of that. i now have a couple ways i am gonna get the $300 for court. but its gonna take some hard work. its a drag always being completely broke. but i guess im making my own way. in soon time, im going to prove to all of you that i can make it on my own. im not dissing on anyone or anything, but i bet a majority couldnt have gone this long without parents or anyone around for help all the time. i mean, ive had help..but ive had to find it on my own. it has been hard living without parents for so long. but shits getting better. and just for referance...if you're going to say something about what i just said..about no parents and shit..keep your mouth shut because i could really care what you have to say. thats just for anyone who wants to start shit about all that. anyway, saturday im going with nate on a double date kind of thing. going to the mall and out to eat and stuff. that should be fun. its not necessarely a date but some people might consider it that. im thinking this weekend will be pretty fun. but ill see you all tomorrow at the end of the school day, i got some shit to do in the morning in cedar so ill be around. i had this talk with someone earlier, about music and whatnot. i wanna know who agree's with me here.
Skid Row
Motley Crew
L.A. Guns
Guns and Roses
Queensryche
These are a few of the greatest bands in the history of music. tell me if you agree with me here. there's more but, the 80's rock...there's nothing better. all the shit we listen to now, these were most likely inspiration to tons of them. i guess i just feel like causing some music controversy. anyway, tell me what you think. see all of you later.
Bradley
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Brad
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2004 3 November :: 4.21pm
:: Mood: pretty good
:: Music: Elvis Presley - money hunny
news for all. none of you will be seeing me for a little while. i wont be at school for a week or so. im getting my license back tomorrow. its going to cost me around $300, thats nothing though...it was cut down a lot by the judge. i guess im the first one in the group to actually go to court...with the judge and the whole "all rise" thing. it was messed up. my fee's would have been about a grand, but the judge was nice. but there were people there who were getting in trouble for breaking into cars and vandolizing and shit...they had to pay like $5000. it was a realy wake up call...trashing shit isnt worth it anymore after seeing what they had to go through. but i took my tint off today, now im borrowing the $300 from my aunt because she's the only one who has that kind of money. its either that or jail...and i would go to jail, for a max of 93 days. but anyway, im gonna be staying here at nate's for the time im not around. im gonna be looking for a job so i can repay some debts and get back on my feet. obviously my dad isnt going to give me child support...if he does, cool. if he doesnt, fuck him. so i guess i was just telling you all, if you care, this way no one worries or anything. i havent slept since two nights ago..its terrible. anyway, you all have fun. love you all, goodbye.
Brad
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Brad
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2004 3 November :: 2.06am
*sigh* well, things are pretty messed up. being homeless is starting to take its toll on me. tomorrow i have to go to court at 8:30 in the morning. im here at nate's, he's my ride. im hoping i get my license back tomorrow. i get to live in my car for a while, at least till i find a job or something. yesterday, i picked up a few necessities like deoderant and whatnot. i couldnt buy it so yeah....i figured since i need it theres only one way to get it; stupid meijer.
im losing friends, im losing more than i thought i'd ever lose. its not bad enough that i have all this shit going on...i need friend drama. i just dont want to deal with any of it. i cant really trust many people anymore...so many people are spreading rumors and trying to ruin more shit for me now. gah, oh well. im sick of whining. goodbye
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rere12389
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2004 2 November :: 8.06pm
:: Mood: super good!
these are really funny... thanks amanda, enjoy!
General Ways to Annoy People
Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, and insist to others that you "like it that way".
Answer every question with another question. As soon as one of you says a statement instead of a question, shout "I win!".
Ask people to prove everything they say. (e.g. "I'm Bob, nice to meet you..." "PROVE IT!")
Before exiting the elevator, push all the buttons.
Consistently refer to everyone as 'mortal.'
Declare your apartment an independent nation, and sue your neighbors upstairs for "violating your airspace."
Every time someone asks you to do something or says something to you ask "Is that a threat?"
~Re~
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