Shea's thoughts

:: 2006 27 May :: 9.18am

ugh how'd i get so fucking replaced?

dumb

and oh what else is dumb. i dont have work from 9 - 5:30 like i thought. it's 10- 7:30... so i still dont' have to close but the day will pretty much be over when i get out. hooray. and my wisdom teeth (lack there of) still hurt and are even bleeding still. gross i know but what do i do. i dont know what else there is to do? so now i just get to talk for 9 hours making it worse. ugh!

:: 2006 26 May :: 11.46pm

omg.

i realized for the second time that i am done with high school

party!!!

and i love beans and love working with her but i hate working

tomorrow's another day another dollar. as much as i hate that phrase.

9-5:30..... at least i dont have to close.

ASLK!@! and my teeth or lack there of still hurt. i actually think they are bleeding. come on and heal already jeez.

and oh wait there's more. i am so totally in love with roman bryan nastally garcia. i could just dance! love him. yay for love. and everyone in it.

:: 2006 26 May :: 10.01am

oh my gosh i need to lose weight.

i'm getting so ... ugh frusterated. what if i can't handle it all. ugh and then right after i type that he calls and says i love you. pfff. sucker. i'm a sucker for him. well okay . in short. i can handle it and i will handle it and it will be the happiest moment in my life when i am finally free. we are finally free. i can't wait and i can say i did it on my own. we did it.

but i still need to lose weight. i'm so gross.
8 months of being apart and never better.

well, doctors appointment and then work from 1 - 10pm. i have no life. but i need the money.

:: 2006 24 May :: 2.29pm

go to bank
get schedule at rosies
mail at postoffice
pay car payment
U

:: 2006 23 May :: 10.10pm
:: Mood: Nervous

I like to ramble about nothing...

Thoughts are like clouds that casually drift on by. They dont stay very long because they are only thoughts. I have alot of thoughts and for the life of me I dont know what to do with alot of them. Many I keep to meself and never tell a soul. Others I share with my close friends and others I simply share with everybody. But my question is why do I have so many that I cant say to anybody. The things that go through my head is amazing. Alot of times I can organize them but right now I cant. They are good thoughts but I am afraid that if I mention my thoughts to anybody then the thoughts will disappear or turn sour.

I am very content right now but I have so many things floating through my head that I dont know what to do about them. I hear songs or CDs that remind me of certain people and of the good times back then. And then I have a sudden rush of wondering of what might of happened if I had done it differently. Or maybe even simply said what was on my mind at the time. Or maybe just let time pass and see what happened. But most of the time things turned sour because I had something that was repeated and I got screwed over which was really my fault anyway because I took the chance to say it and it was fair game to be repeated.

I have been pretty stupid on certain things in the last 2 years and some of it I regret but it is nothing I can change. If I could do it over again I would think things through more clearly before I had acted.

I think to much and I do believe whole heartedly that that is my problem. Maybe if I just let things happen as they would, without my thoughts, then I might be better off.

But sometimes thoughts are good.
Just not the ones I think though.
I guess.

Conclusion: Thoughts can be good when the situation is becoming bad but when you have a good thing going just dont think and everything will work out.

I am sure of it.

3 Added Water!! | Do you want to see some drama?

:: 2006 23 May :: 9.49pm

i just took like 30 pictures of myself and edited them all

getting your wisdom teeth out doesn't hurt THAT bad but it sure it boring!

living room dark red and bed room purple... bathroom i think light blue and what color should the kitchen be?

:: 2006 23 May :: 2.33pm
:: Mood: sore
:: Music: i write sins not tradgedies

life may be okay again

So i think it's fine and we're fine and most of all i'm fine because you were fine to begin with. which i highly appreciate and find completely supportive and sweet and loving and it was sweet to hear it all but i just could not handle it i know.

it is a little tiny bit sad but most of all.. not.

so i am happy and not scared and my mouth hurts but hopefully that willl be the only pain i experience for a long time.

hooray, life is good again i think and i am so looking forward to the move and the apartment. yay!

:: 2006 23 May :: 12.16am
:: Mood: tired

I usually dont post about my track results but I just have to for this.

I ran at the Champion of Champions meet today and placed 8th in the 800 m run. That sounds bad but not when you look at the time. I ran it in 2:29. To sum it up that is getting competive in the girls race. Wth that time I was able to qualify for the Jon Bose Initavational at Houseman Field this Wednesday and I have decided to run.

I am just so excited that in needed to share that.

:: 2006 22 May :: 11.01pm

well i got my wisdom teeth out todya. it wasnt as bad as thought i t was gonna be. i started getting alittle teary-eyed when they stuck the IV in my arm and hooked all the ekgs and stuff up to me. i heard my heart beat and it was going so fast because i got really scared and they stuck the little tubes up my nose to breath and then that's all i remember really. then i just felt really sick on the way home as we were pulling onto my road i was sure iw as going to throw up because my mouth was so dry and i was so hot and i was just like sitting in my moms car passed out while she got my prescriptions and some soft/liquid food. i told her it was okay but when i woke up from my stupor i wished i had told her to just bring me home first because i felt so sick . my mouth was so dry it was jut making me really sick.

but then i just watched a movie and had some more vicadin and fell asleep. .... haven't done much today just stayed in bed and slept and got more meds and slept more and then just went dow n and ate a little more applesauce and pudding. and now i'm just chillin... about ready for bed. and some more vicadin. i deff. dont mind that stuff. i'm really mellow.

for the most part.

:: 2006 22 May :: 1.17pm
:: Mood: crazy

This is rare...

I'm pretty....

I don't say that very often because the majority of the time I'm not but today I am.

And today I don't care what anybody says.

I just am.

:: 2006 20 May :: 6.58pm

ahhhhhh i duno.......

what is going to happen?

2 Added Water!! | Do you want to see some drama?

:: 2006 19 May :: 7.33pm

so who got a bomb new laptop and awesome printer/copier/scanner for graduating??

yeah that's right. i did. suck on it, losers.

thanks dad and mom! it's so awesome. ahhhhh

it has wireless internet, which we have here at home so i can use it. it has dvd player and BURNER and cd burner and an awesome screen and ahhhh it's so cool!! hooray!

6 Added Water!! | Do you want to see some drama?

:: 2006 19 May :: 3.32pm

WOOOOOO fuck you school!!! you dirty whore!!! I am done with you forever and I never have to look at your ugly skanky bitch ass ever again!!! you are the biggest whore that ever existed and I hate you and now i'm done!! fuck you schooollllllll fuuuuuuuck youuuu!!!!!!

good riddence! or ridance or riddance. i dont even know how to spell it but i dont care! it's done!

jennapie

:: 2006 18 May :: 10.32pm

Oh man, what a frustrating night.

:: 2006 18 May :: 10.21pm
:: Mood: mellow

Sometimes the best things in life are worth losing everything over but then again it just shows what you are really worth to everybody else.