emilydawest
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2004 5 April :: 4.42pm
Yes! Good day for once in my life (it seems) no not really, school actually sucked because i was on the edge of being dead. Yes, dead. I shouldn't have stayed up so late last night watching the 10 Commandments with Charleton, but what can i say, it was a good epic. certainly.
But i paid for the not going to bed until 12 today. I was so whipped i wasn't sure if i was going to make it through school or not. I'm doing alright now, i think being locked in school without any natural lighting did a number on me too. The sunlight gushing through the windows here has perked me up a bit :)
And plus i have been trying on clothes for my big trip! Which is slowly creeping up on me! Omy! ahhhh. I haven't decided exactly what i am going to pack yet tho...so far all my shorts fit but some i am almost afraid to wear in public, so i may have to go shopping so as not to expose myself.
yes, and California here i come.
crush me
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sushininja
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2004 4 April :: 2.00pm
:: Mood: tired...
:: Music: Scenes from a Memory-Dream Theater
Hmm...This weekends been fun...Friday, I couldn't wait for school to end, to go home and not go to work...I've never looked forward to a Friday so much...it's not good, if you think about it...showing that I hate work so much...I want a new job, but I'm too lazy to go find one...meh, oh well...I came home, played a lot of Gunbound, and then went to pick Sara up...we went to Uraku at 5:30 and ran into Yi...we made fun of her, with the help of one of the waiters (Chu or Ju)...we also got threatened by her friend, said she'd fuck us up for messing with Yi...Coomes came about 15 minutes later...we ate some sushi, and then we left...I ran into Emma and Emily...after eating, we took Yi home, then dropped Coomes off at Piso's...went to Video Connection and rented "Duplex" which was a horrible movie, by the way...not horrible, but bad nonetheless...but it was fun...then we went driving around...to Texas and Grand Rapids...then we went to DQ and met up with the track team...had a fun time with that, and then I took Sara home...I went home and played some GunBound...Carmen called around 11:30 and we chatted for awhile...finally got to sleep around 3 or 4...
Saturday, I woke up around 7, and then couldn't get back to sleep...went to work at 10, then came home...played GunBound forever...went shopping with my mom, bought some PJ's, two pairs of boxers, and another volume of Escaflowne...was a good trip...I went to get my hair cut, then to Finder's to buy a cd...I then went to church...after awhile, my mom and I went to Meijer and then to the Pharm...we rented "Identity" which was good...I had Luca's for dinner...watched the movie, and then played GunBound...I went to bed, and read some of "The Once and Future King"...Carmen called around 1:15, and we chatted some more...I had been text messaging her most of the day...
Today, I woke up around 10 something, and have been doing nothing all day...my dad recently got home, and he brought me some LP's and a record player...yay for records!
I should be working on my paper...hmm...
Quote of the day:
"Today I know what I want to do but I don't know what for"
2 heartless bastards |
crush me
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emilydawest
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2004 3 April :: 6.02pm
It's already Saturday...
errrrrr.....
But anyways I am beginning to finally realize that i am going to be gone and in another state for spring break! It hasn't really sunk in until now i guess. I mean i know it is going to happen but it seems strange...because i can't even imagine what it is really going to be like.
weird.
crush me
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emilydawest
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2004 2 April :: 3.22pm
it is friday and it couldn't be better. I can finally get some much needed relaxation time (i hope) and try to not worry about my life and all the little complications that come along with it.
Only a week until Spring Break. Semi (well actuall very) excited about that. I haven't told everyone where i am going and i intend to keep it that way for certain reasons. So ha.
Anyways, tonight i am going to the allstar bball game for this area of ohio. The best players from several teams will be joining together and facing off. It should be fun, i know the Griffin is going to be there and maybe Green, but i don't really know, i know that my brother would (since all of the sudden he is a basketball freak)
It is so nice to be home after such a crazy day. I thought i wasn't going to be home until around four thirty, but i left school around 1:40 with sharon and her mom. I stopped by my tanning place and luckily there was an opening before three so i got that done. And i got home a little after 2:30, which is awesome, because i got home when i should have been getting out of class. hahahaha.
But the funniest thing that i think that happened (is going t happen) is that sharon's mom was talking about what she was going to have for supper because they can't eat meat because it is a friday during Lent (they are catholics) and so i was teasing sharon about how when i got home i was going to have a pizza with meat on it (because for supper she was going to have a plain cheese one) and she bet me that i wouldn't have a meat pizza. So i was just kidding around by saying i really was going to have one. Well i get home and call my dad to tell him that i got taken home already so he didn't have to pick me up and he said, "should i get one cheese and one chicken?" and for a minute i was a bit confused then i figured out her was talking about pizza! So i really am going to have a meat pizza tonight, and i can't wait to shove that in sharon's face when she shows up at 6:30 to leave for allstar game. Hah.
crush me
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sushininja
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2004 1 April :: 11.26pm
:: Mood: tired...slightly depressed...
Well, today, school gave me alot of unwanted stress...I somehow lost my lit cirlce questions before second period, so I worried and fretted about those for three or so hours...then I went home during lunch and printed off another set...
It is April 1st today, so we screwed around with that topic in French today...we threw around many swedish fish, trying to get them in eachother's mouths...Ian and I, that is...Ian succeeded, I did not...meh...
Art is becoming increasingly dumb...Sockman and Laabs are both disappointed with me for not taking art next year...PSEOP got in the way too...and them, kinda, always being too forceful with their opinions upon our work...*sigh*
Work was alright...got plenty of shelving done...2 sections of non-fiction, and all of literacy...well, except for the videos, which I'll do on Saturday...Terry was in the library today, so we talked for awhile...haven't really talked to him since last year in biology...he's a good kid, I don't see why so many pick on him...sad really...may be a bit dorky or nerdy to a few, but he's a good kid...
After work, I played some Gunbound...I'm finally a metal-axe...doing sweet also...
After playing some GB, I went and sewed at Carmen's...she's leaving tomorrow for states, and not getting back till Sunday...
I've been getting a feeling of dread lately...don't know what it is from...it's like a giant knot in my stomache, 24/7...it is inescapable...
Quote of the day:
"Said there ain't no use in crying. Cause it will only, only drive you mad
Does it hurt to hear them lying? Was this the only world you had? Oh-oh "
1 heartless bastard |
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emilydawest
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2004 1 April :: 9.31pm
Well, i have come to the conclusion after many hours of fighting that..
my printer has become self-aware.
It certainly has a mind of its own when it takes in 8 sheets of paper instead of one. Then when i put one sheet in at a time it decides just at that very moment that it does not want to print.
Also it has this fond tendency to pause printing jobs randomly. So I instinctively restart the computer and when i try to print again it doesn't work. So i check to see if it is paused, and more often then not it is.
So folks, i'd be careful with your printer, you never know, it may start a rebellion.
crush me
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sushininja
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2004 31 March :: 10.45pm
:: Mood: Grr...
:: Music: Iron Maiden
Well, as of right now (and not looking as if it's going to change) I'm not going camping as I had wanted to this spring break...I will get to spend time with my aunt though...hopefully (somehow) hook up either with Xiao or Jess...but that seems a bit unlikely to me...but camping sure would have been fun as hell...
Aside from that, my day was suck...so was yesterday...well, most of it...hanging out with friends is fun, and uplifting...last night, I went to keep Carmen company while she worked, and then we (her, Esther, and I) went to Kroger...today, I hung out with Carmen after school and then, after work, I went with Carmen to Esther's, where they discussed their camping trip over our spring break...it was a good time though, we screwed around and stuff...
Work sucks...I found myself wishing for a glass of drano today...or a lot of matches...work sucks, completely...it is good, however, when people come to visit me...doesn't have to be for long...a 10 minute visit is better than nothing...however, it is nowhere written, nor was it ever stated that Carmen is the only person who can visit me (I'm not overlooking the recent visits by Coomes and Amanda. Thanks)...but hey, maybe cheering your friend up isn't worth the gas used to see him...
And you can be certain I won't tell you to go away...
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Clouds of Worries
In the damp morning, my worries rain down
In the damp morning, my worries rain down
It’s building up, and it seems I may drown
As I make my way through the day, the pounding rain continues
As I make my way through the day, the pounding rain continues
The streets and sidewalks flood, there isn’t much that I can do
School, life, and work are the relentless clouds unleashing their rain
School, life, and work are the relentless clouds unleashing their rain
I finally decide to fight back, and begin looking for the drain
I wade through all these worries and insecurities, continuing to hold my umbrella high
I wade through all these worries and insecurities, continuing to hold my umbrella high
I sure am glad this rain isn’t acidic, otherwise I would surely die
As I stumble and fall into the water, I quickly rise to the top and float
As I stumble and fall into the water, I quickly rise to the top and float
I hear my friends calling, they are coming for me in a boat
Upon getting in the boat, I realized I would have never drowned
Upon getting in the boat, I realized I would have never drowned
When worries set their weight on me, friends will pick me up when I’m down
3 heartless bastards |
crush me
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sushininja
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2004 30 March :: 10.42pm
:: Mood: tired...
:: Music: LoD, DoD
Well...it's been a few days...not too much has happened...Bassoon lessons are going well...turned in my PSEOP stuff...blah blah blah...been spending time with Carmen, having fun with her...it's nice...and that's it, cause my time is up...expect more next time...
Quote of the day:
"Cats are on the upgrade.
Upgrade?
Hipgrave
Oh, Mac."
crush me
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emilydawest
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2004 30 March :: 7.45pm
March is almost over. Soon it will be spring break. And after that it will be summer.
what fun
it is to ride in a one horse open sleigh hey.
crush me
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emilydawest
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2004 28 March :: 6.51pm
It is so hard to come back to reality after such a great weekend. I wish I could stay in Indiana forever.
crush me
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sushininja
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2004 27 March :: 2.29am
:: Mood: meh...
Well...I haven't really done much since my last update...Thursday, school was alright...had lunch C, but Carmen was ill, and most of my friends were on the Chem trip...so I sat with Esther, Doug, and some others...Carmen came in and said hi, told us what was up...after school, I went and visited Carmen for a little while, and then went and picked up the cookie dough...I took that to work, and then worked until 6:30...then, I went to dinner with my parents, rented a movie, and then went to Carmen's...played some Halo and watched Kiki's Delivery Service...
This morning, I went to the dentist's office and got cavities filled...they used 3 vials of novacaine, numbing most of my cheek and lip along with my gums...I came home, and just was completely bored for the whole day...I was supposed to hang out with Carmen, but her errands took too long...I went to Coome's at 3:15-ish, and hung out...watched a few episodes of Kaze No Yojimbo, which is looking really good...we then played Pirates Cove with Mr. Coomes...josh came over, and then we played some magic...it was actually quite fun, having a 4 person Magic game, with Mr. Coomes' aggravating deck...after that, we played Titan Arena, then we left...Coomes and I went to Finder's and then to Falex's...we hung out for awhile, beat Ricky in Perfect Dark, got beaten by Brent (by one point!) and then left...met up with Carmen, Esther, Doug, Gina, and Smitty at Grounds...we hung out for awhile, and then went back to Carmen's (only Doug^2 and Carmen)...hung around, and then I left...that was my day, half boring, half fun...
No qoute, sorry folks...
4 heartless bastards |
crush me
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sushininja
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2004 24 March :: 10.43pm
:: Mood: around...
:: Music: LoD, DoD
Well, today was good...I woke up without much trouble...got to school, and played in band...but then I got to french, and asked Mrs. Kern if I could redo the french paper because I had misunderstood/misheard the requirements...she told me no...*sigh*...not much that I can do there...in Art, we were doing gesture drawings, which were a blast...in math, it pretty much was a study hall for us, because half the class is taking the test today, and the other half tomorrow...the good that comes out of that is being able to dine with Carmen and the others twice this week...
After school, Carmen came home and we hung out for awhile...then I went to work, which was great...I only had to work 2 hours! That is because of the NHS banquet...that was good, had good food (lots of it too) and sat with Ian and Britt and their families...ran into a little bit of trouble (not having the right pin, misspelt name) but it went fine...afterwards, Carmen and I went to Kroger to pick up some stuff...said hi to Sara, and then we came back to my place...we took a nice stroll in the rain and talked about random stuff...that is definitely something I miss...walking and talking with Carmen...
Quote of the day:
"It takes one to be a god
It takes one to feel lonely"
2 heartless bastards |
crush me
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emilydawest
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2004 24 March :: 9.32pm
To add to my harsh self criticism i am going to add something positive.
I have a few things going for me even tho my health and face aren't in that great of a condition as of now.
I have semi-nice hair
I'm not fat
I laugh alot
I can memorize things easily
I am tidy
so yep. Wow the positives look like they out weigh the negatives right now. That's a change.
1 heartless bastard |
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emilydawest
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2004 24 March :: 9.31pm
the last few days have been fairly trying. I thought i was getting over my illness aka Sinus Congestion of Death, but i guess my lovely sickness is too wily for me because i am in the pit again.
Plus to make matters worse my face suddenly decides go ballistic on me. Hmmm... it looks quite like i have been in close contact with a bomb and my face took a hard hit of shrapnel. Yes, that is exactly what it looks like.
Normally i don't mind going through WWI in the respects that my lungs are slowly filling with mucus from inhaling mustard gas or that my face has nearly been blown away by shrapnel, but i am going to see my boyfriend this weekend. And i am pretty sure he doesn't want a war victim on his doorstep hacking up pieces of her lungs with oozing face wounds.
crush me
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sushininja
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2004 23 March :: 10.40pm
Hmm...My hopes have been trashed...not really my hopes, and not really trashed...I was thinking about our states comp. being moved, and then thought that would be in Jess' district...I had forgotten she isn't in school band...bah...
But on a better note, upon seeing/reading that I was in a really ratty mood, Carmen came and visited me at the library...twice! it was quite lovely...cheered me right up...
I spent tonight playing some video games...yeah...
Quote of the day:
"So fly away Peter and fly away Paul
from the finger-tip ledge of contentment.
Well, the long restless rustle of high-heeled boots calls.
And I'm probably bound to deceive you after all."
2 heartless bastards |
crush me
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sushininja
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2004 23 March :: 3.30pm
:: Mood: extremely touchy...edgy...horrible...
:: Music: LoD, DoD
Hmm...Today was kinda bad...I dunno why, but I was extremely grumpy...everything seemed to be getting on my nerves...I couldn't stand my lunch table to day...well, that has been an increasing thing, that they are just annoying and get on my nerves very easily...hmm...but hopefully something changes soon...mabe I'm too stressed...work definitely doesn't help...it just manages to get on my nevers even more...
I really dislike how much of my life is monotony...I work 5 days a week...work is always the same...I'm always shelving books...always alone...
I've not been sleeping well lately...last night was off and on for me, and the night before, I got less than 3...perhaps less than 2 and a half good hours...
Last night, I watched part of War of the Buttons with Carmen, Esther, Ben, and Nick...it would have been nice to watch the whole thing, but sometimes that doesn't work out...and as far as my parents see, since I'm a junior, my curfew needs to stay 9:30...and 12 on weekends...*sigh*
Today, I had cake, because it was Mrs. Dunn's birthday...last years AS class brought in cake...it was nice...I got a 4 out of 9 on my paper for French...I think I'm gonna ask if I can redo it, since I was 100% under the impression that it needed to be only 1 page...hopefully she lets me, but she is a fucking bitch, so probably not...not like she even gave us a rubric...damn...
And now I'm all worked up before work...*sigh*
Quote of the day:
"May I make my fond excuses for the lateness of the hour"
2 heartless bastards |
crush me
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emilydawest
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2004 21 March :: 9.42pm
It's Sunday. The weekend certainly went by fast, and it seems that getting over being sick didn't happen like i wished it would have...
Tomorrow is going to be pretty darn busy. Haircuts, taking grandma to get prescriptions, laura has bball practice, and after all of that i have to work on my art project, or at least start it. I know there is something else going on, but i am basically along for the ride with the rest of my family so i don't really have to know all the details. Anyways, it should be an interesting day. I hope.
Plus this week is extra short (only 4 school days) because friday is a teacher/parent conference day! Which means i can leave to see Xach earlier than usual, and not miss any school! I am just hoping that mom doesn't have to work that day so i can leave before 1 or maybe even earlier than that...who knows!
goodnight, sleep tight world.
crush me
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sushininja
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2004 21 March :: 11.05am
:: Mood: hmm...
:: Music: Light of Day, Day of Darkness
So I haven't updated in awhile...I either didn't have A) the time or B) the motivation...
Friday, we went to districts for band...we got an unexpected rating of 1...now we've got to go to states, play a new song...hopefully we get a 1 at states this year...we have a lot of work to do though...before that, I had chinese for dinner...I had chicken...and I had turkey for lunch...I must be a heathen or something...
Yesterday, I woke up late, went to work late, and left late...after work, I went to Carmen's...we hung out until she left for Liz(z)'s for a movie, and then we went to church...after church, we attended the fondue party, which was mighty good...we were there until 8:30...Dan ditched us though...we came home, and watched the Never Ending Story...it was a good movie...
Quote of the day:
"Many times I've lied - Many times I've listened
Many times I've wondered how much there is to know."
1 heartless bastard |
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emilydawest
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2004 20 March :: 10.42pm
i wished
and wished
and again made a wish
upon your star
the one you showed me
glistening in the night
I held it in my hand
and wished it away
so it went
to you
crush me
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emilydawest
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2004 20 March :: 9.56pm
Don't remember what i wrote in my last entry and am not inclined to check and see what it was that i wrote...
anyways.
Grandma Carney turns 83 on Wednesday and Grandpa would have been 90 on the 10th of this month....
Time is going by pretty quickly now. I just realized that in a few weeks is my spring break which means i will be on the other side of the continent. It's weird to think about it...mostly because i can't even imagine what it is going to be like...i think it may be something like florida, but then again cali is the pacific ocean not the atlantic...ugh...its so crazy.
I think i am getting over being sick a little bit...a little. But maybe it is because i OD'ed on sinus medicine because i was tired of blowing my nose every two seconds. I'm still coughing, but that doesn't bother me as much because i think i am used to it now. Let's say it is like second nature...lol.
That reminds me of something funny that happened today. When i was at Laura's bball game at the Church of the Nazarene I was leaning agaisnt the wall when i felt something funny. I turned around and it was like this funky switch thing. Well, if you know me i can't keep my hands off of anything, so i pushed one of the buttons and all of the sudden the whole bball court/ sanctuary goes black. I did an aboutface and walked out of there double time. lol. It was pretty embarrassing, but my dad was sitting right by them and flicked the switch and took the blame for me. Ha, he is great.
blah blah blah blah blah blah blah. I have a presentation in history tomorrow and this will be only the 2nd presentation i have made at all this year. Makes me a bit antsy, but it should be easy because i am doing it with a group and i only have to talk for three minutes, if that. Plus i have a really small class...let me see.. 14 or 15. That is about the size of my German class which is 13.
nighty night.
and i will be seeing you soon Xach.
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