Believe in the Day

Believe in the Day

:: 2005 23 November :: 9.19 pm

I'm home. And already bored. If anyone wants to do anything, call me. I'm here till sunday.

:: 2005 21 November :: 9.06 pm
:: Music: Allman Brothers

So I've got the itch.....
I think I figured out my problem. I've got the itch. I haven't been on the road in a very long time. So I'm thinking of going on a roadtrip over winter break. Anyone interested? I'm not sure if I can convince my parents but if I tell them it's a preventative measure to keep me from dropping out and taking up hitchhiking or trainhopping they might let me. However if I find it to be an agreeable way of life, moreso than college, it might become permanent.

You can go ahead and call me crazy now. I'm sure I sound insane.....

8 believed | Well?

:: 2005 20 November :: 4.44 am
:: Mood: antsy

I'm ready to pick up and leave. I like college and everything, but I don't know if it's what I should be doing. What I really want to do is just live in the woods, or on a commune, or travel around, or something equally outlandish. Because it seems like college is simply preparing me for a future I don't want. A future I never wanted and have been trying to avoid and put off. I guess what it comes down to is I'm sick and tired of being part of the mainstream. Because I certainly don't belong here. I mean, I knew eventually I'd get sick of it and drop out, but I thougt I had a few more years. I thought I'd get thru college at least. But here it is, almost 5 am, and I can't get to sleep cause I'm fuckin wired and wishing I was outside. It's what? like 30 degrees out? And I have the window open because I can't stand breathing stale air. You know what? I was never happier than I was last summer at camp. For all the bullshit I put up with, and the long days, I felt like the luckiest girl in the world. Because how many people get to be around horses all day and live in the woods? Even when I had to wake up at 5:30 in the morning I didn't mind all that much. I saw some amazing sunrises. God, I'm practically counting the days till I go back. But I just don't know how much more I can deal with. I'm sick of TV, the radio, cars, etc, etc.... I really just want to live on my own terms, is that so much to ask? I don't see how college is conduicive to that. There is a problem though. If perchance I drop out and go persue this grand scheme, and it doesn't work out, and I want to go back to school I am fucked. Because I'd have to pay for it myself. Which is probably why I'll stick it out. However I will be pissed if I spend all this time and money on getting a degree and then I never use it. Which I probably won't because to use most degrees you have to get a *shudder* real job. So...if you haven't noticed I really don't know where I'm going with this.

It's quite possible this will all be irrelevant by tomorrow.
Good night, or good morning if you prefer.

3 believed | Well?

:: 2005 17 November :: 7.27 am
:: Mood: happy!

I just finished my paper for English. With 2 hours to spare! Go me! If I get a bad grade on this I will be extremely pissed being that this is the 2nd night in a row I spent writing till the crack of dawn. But at least I don't have anything else due till after thanksgiving....

That is all.

Well?

:: 2005 10 November :: 5.45 pm
:: Mood: retardedly happy

Random Stuff....including ham
I miss my dog like the dickens.

Also, my dorm room smells like ham and nobody believes me! Not even my own roommates! They were all like "Wow something in the trash really stinks." And I was like "I know it smells like ham!" And then they were all like "Jesus Christ Kelly it doesn't smell like ham!" But I swear to god it does. I even got a headache from it last night. I got a ham headache.

I will see you in less than 24 hours Katie! I hope your dorm doesn't smell like ham!

1 believed | Well?

:: 2005 8 November :: 3.11 pm
:: Mood: pissed
:: Music: Raised Under Reagan-No Compromise

Anti-Nazi Rant
Hi friends. So today was interesting. I went to an anti-nazi protest. Yes, there are nazis in this fucking podunk town. At the moment they're trying to become an official club. But to do that they'd have to have in their constitution that they won't discriminate....so I don't see how that would work. But whether they're official or not, they're still here operating. And it pisses me off. It's amazing the amount of bullshit I've heard about how they have 'freedom of speech'. Well guess what? So do I. And if they think I'm gonna sit by and praise the so-called 'diversity' of those bastards' lies they are fucking insane.

Yesterday in the paper someone wrote an editorial about how liberals and nazis are essentially the same. So apparently because I believe in civil rights and liberties, keeping the government off my body and out my bedroom, and helping the oppressed, I'm a fucking nazi. I didn't know real people actually thought like that. I thought it was all sheltered people who are experts in double-speak, like Anne Coulter and Bill O'Reilley, surrounded by yes-men. I guess I was wrong.

But what pisses me off the most about this whole thing is that it's even an issue. I thought we were way past this. Didn't anyone learn anything from the holocaust? Oh wait, that's right, neo-nazi's deny the fucking holocaust ever even happened! No shit.

Anyway, I needed to vent. Fuck off, nazi's.

"Don�t be cattle, be citizens
State your opinions
Speak out! No Compromise!"

2 believed | Well?

:: 2005 6 November :: 7.35 pm
:: Mood: aggravated
:: Music: Clutch-Spacegrass

There is no word in the English language I hate more than "success". It's such a bullshit word. And you know all my professors/advisors/other old people I'm supposed to respect are obsessed with it. So the next time I'm assigned an essay about success I'm going to say "Fuck success."

I could go on but I don't feel like it.

You wanna know something funny? I had to look in the dictionary to figure how to spell success. Buahahahaha!

1 believed | Well?

:: 2005 5 November :: 11.58 pm
:: Mood: tired
:: Music: I can't hear shit at the moment...

Hi friends. Today was a long, eventful day.

I woke up at like 6:30 cause my roommate's damn alarm went off then. So then I couldn't get back to sleep so I swug like half a bottle of Benadryl (granted, it was a small bottle). I got up for real at like 11:30. My parents called me to bitch at me while I was in the shower because I was apparently supposed to magically know I had to meet them right then to go the football game. So then I rushed over to the football stadium which is like a mile away from my dorm. Mind you I was still woozy from the benadryl.

So we went to the game and I got see my family, yay. Central lost though. Bleah. Then we went to the coffee shop that my dad is now obsessed with. Yay coffee. God knows I needed it.

Then after my parents left, I went to a punk rock show that was at the Wesylan church of all places. There was about a million bands playing for 5 bucks. Pretty nifty. So I thrashed around for hours and saw one of my favorite bands, Chinese Happy. Kyle, you should check them out. They're pretty awesome. So at the end of their set the guitarist smashed up his guitar. I have the fretboard. It's hanging on the wall. I thought I was only there for like 2 or 3 hours, but I was there for 5 hours. That show kicked my ass. I'm gonna be sore tomorrow.

I think that's it. Hope y'all had good weekends. Au revoir....

4 believed | Well?

:: 2005 1 November :: 9.10 pm

So I just had a long and slightly blasphemous conversation with God....
Read more..

2 believed | Well?

:: 2005 30 October :: 9.12 pm

Far out freaky shit
I am half convinced our dorm room is haunted. All year books have randomly been falling from my shelves. Like, for no reason whatsoever. My roommate lost her hairbrush and can't find it anywhere. She had to go out and buy a new one. Actually, she might've lost 2 since she's been up here. I don't remember. My other roommate's fish is possessed or something. It looks sick all the time but it won't die. And today it jumped out of its tank. It was out at least 20 minutes and it's still alive. Weird.

So if anything else weird happens I'll be convinced.

3 believed | Well?

:: 2005 28 October :: 6.02 pm
:: Mood: frustrated
:: Music: Raised Under Reagan-The Rules

This world is fuckin heartless. But thats ok, I'll work around it.

Well?

:: 2005 25 October :: 6.35 pm
:: Mood: disturbed

Does this scare the shit out of anyone but me?
http://news.com.com/FAQ+How+Real+ID+will+affect+you/2100-1028_3-5697111.html?tag=st.num

If so, write a letter. Send it to everyone you can think of. I know I will. So if you guys care but are lazy I'll post the letter here and you can just use that one. But anyway, don't let this pass without a fight. Because this is scary.

[edit 8:24]
I am so behind the times. Apparently this already passed. In May. The changes have to be in effect by May 2008. I'm still writing a letter though.

1 believed | Well?

:: 2005 22 October :: 5.57 pm
:: Music: my ears are ringing.......

"What the hell are you saying?"
So I went on a field trip for my geography class today.
It was one of the surrealest days of my life.
Details to follow...
The last few paragraphs are the most interesting.
Read more..

1 believed | Well?

:: 2005 20 October :: 5.06 pm
:: Mood: disillusioned
:: Music: Pedro the Lion

"Have you ever seen an idealist with grey hairs on his head?
Or a succesful man who keeps in touch with unsuccessful friends?
You only think you did, I could have sworn I saw it too.
But as it turns out, it was just a clever ad for cigarettes."

Do you really think its true?

God I hope it isn't.

But if it is then I have been wasting my time.

3 believed | Well?

:: 2005 20 October :: 12.26 am
:: Music: Led Zeppelin-You Shook Me

I am quite possibly the worst procrastinator in the world. I should have started studying for french over an hour ago. I finally started about 10 minutes ago, and now I'm taking a "study break". Yeah. But on the plus side, while I was procrastinating, I discovered I like the Pixies. A lot.

Ok, I'm gonna go study for real now.

2 believed | Well?