:: 2003 31 July :: 1.05 am
:: Mood: aggravated

Damn you!!!!!! you made me cry!

4 people who kissed me | Kiss me!

:: 2003 30 July :: 4.32 pm
:: Mood: devious

I know
I know
I shouldnt do it.... but it has to happen. sorry stephen. I have waited this long to tell her what is on my mind. But i have waited only because you asked me to. And after what i have heard today. She is going to pay. I will be devious, and as nice as i can. I wont give her any phisical harm although she deserves it very much so. but you mess with me, that is ok, yu mess with teh friends and your going down. There is so much i need to tell you, that is vital information... Wish you where here although you treated mer like shit. But i will always care even if you dont.
jess

2 people who kissed me | Kiss me!

:: 2003 30 July :: 12.03 am
:: Mood: pissed off

Fuck you!
YOU DONT CARE! WHY THE HELL SHOULD I! I LOVE YOU BUT IT SEEMS YOU DONT LOVE ME. U TREAT ME LIKE AN ASS HOLE! LIKE SOMEONE YOU CAN JUST YELL AT BUT YOUR WRONG!

YOU DONT CARE
YOU DONT CARE
YOU DONT CARE
SO WHY SHOULD I!
DAMN IT ALL!
FUCK THIS SHIT! IM KIND OF PISSED OFF CAN YOU TELL.

11 people who kissed me | Kiss me!

:: 2003 28 July :: 3.46 pm
:: Mood: pathetic

Alright so what i am pretty pathetic today, i miss Stephen and Nick!! My best friend and my boyfriend left me! Nick left me for a week and Stephen left me for a whole 3 weeks. Alright i know i sound really pathetic here, but i am sad... ill have nobody to talk to for a while. *tear* See i mean i know the rest of you i talk to and all, but i am usually spending all my time with Stephen. So yeah that kind of makes my likfe i dont have less of a life, aint that sad. You have like no life, and then you have less of no life. Kind of odd but yet it also kind of makes sence.

Well that is for us crazy people. So anyway i guess i better go, because i am at Kristys right now. And i dont want to use her computer the whole time. Luv you all
chow
Jess

3 people who kissed me | Kiss me!

:: 2003 27 July :: 3.26 pm
:: Mood: silly

Alright this wont be along journal for the fact that i am at my friends Lauras house. I had a blast. We went down to Rockford Yesterday and went bowlin and stuff. great fun, well yeah i just wanted to say hello to you all, and i love you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Always me
Jess
Chow~

3 people who kissed me | Kiss me!

:: 2003 25 July :: 10.59 pm
:: Mood: amused

I JUST GOT BACK FROM THE WHITE CAPS GAME!!! IT WAS GREAT OTHER THEN THE FACT THAT THEY LOST BUT YEAH. I WAS YELLIN AND SCREAMIN WITH OUT A CARE IN THE WORLD IT WAS FUNNY. MY PARENTS KEPT GIVIN ME LOOKS LIKE I WAS INSANE... BUT SEE THE FUNNY THING IS I AM! THAT IS WHAT THEY GET BRINGIN A SPORTS FANATIC TO A BASEBALL GAME I MEAN COME ON. THE REF. WAS SO STUPID THEY MADE SOME REALLY BAD CALLS. IT WAS KIND OF FUNNY THAT THE WHITE CAPS COACH GOT KICKED OUT OF THE GAME.

WONDERFUL STUFF, IT WAS KIND OF FUNNY. MY PARENTS HAVENT SEEN ME INTO SOMTHIN THAT MUCH SINCE FOOTBALL SEASON SO YEAH! CHAT WITH YOU ALL LATER.. THAT IS IF I CAN I THINK I LOST MY VOICE BUT YEAH! CHOW!

Kiss me!

:: 2003 25 July :: 1.11 pm
:: Mood: chipper

Yo! Hey PEOPLES!!!

Just wanted to say HEY and yeah! I wont be home tonight going to a White Caps game! Fun fun! Actually it will be, because the whole thing of me bein a sports fanatic. But yeah anway i just was going get a shower so yeah. Ill talk to you all later! Chow

Nick~ I'll miss you hun! Hope you have fun on your trip. love you!

Stephen~ Your leavin me for 3 weeks! :'( Well at least i can still talk to you online but i am still going to miss you

Laura~ Umm.. found out that i am off from babysittin the week of the 10- 15 not the 4-8 ok! Sorry bout that

Jackie and Ben~ Yo, Hi Whats up!

Rachel~ Hey long time no see but i hope your summer is going great!

Ray~ Hello also, hope your havin a good summer.

kT~ Hope you had a great time while Tina was there and hope your rest of your summer will be great! Feel free to come over and swim sometime

Kyle~ Hi, i dont know you that well but hello!

and yeah i dont think i am forgetin anybody but if i am sorry
Love yal chow

Oh wait

Kristy~ Howdy! Glad your home hun

8 people who kissed me | Kiss me!

:: 2003 23 July :: 4.33 pm
:: Mood: weird

Today was a GREAT DAY!!!!!!!!

Well Pam was over like always, and then Nick and Ben came over and finally so did Stephen. And we all hung out at our house for a while then we went to Stephens and we played Airsoft i won one game and lost one game! But it was a blast other then the welt on my neck and my arm! But it will go away eventually! But yeah we should all get together again and play airsoft! Well i guess i better go! Chat with you all later
love ya
Chow

9 people who kissed me | Kiss me!

:: 2003 21 July :: 10.05 pm
:: Mood: mellow

just because...
Alright i figured that i would actually write some stuff in this journal, because for the fact that nobody reads it. Well not many people anyway and yeah so i can just say how i feel. Umm... life is really complicated lately. Just everything, from anything back to everything again. You know it is pretty sad though. I really dont know why i do what i do. or why i feel the way i feel but there i just this feeling inside me that fears. Fears of the what if's that could come streaming down the road and smack me right up side the head. I am afraid of what can come or more what can go.

I dont want to be alone. Im afraid to be really. But where i am now. Is wonderful for me. I mean sure it isnt the prettist place and stuff could be better. But stuff could be worse. See there is this median in my life. In everybodys life really. Where there bad and the good, come together. And make some place in the middle. That could rise or fall anytime with out even giving you a warning that it could happen. It just shows up out of now where and brings u down or helps you up. Things that happpen that nobody predicts.

Have you also ever noticed that in these journal things the longer they are the most likely it is for people not to read them. Because they dont want to take the time and read what is going on in your life. But yeah so here i am all alone in this cold dark basement of mine. On the computer writing about my life with no worries that someone with read this and make fun because not that many people take the time to read, the fine print!

4 people who kissed me | Kiss me!

:: 2003 20 July :: 6.18 pm
:: Mood: mellow

Alright i have been pretty mellow all day today. It is kind of odd. I mean normally i am up beat and all. But today is just like bla. I have been thinking about a lot of stuff lately most of it, is about my future. It is so stressful. I mean just the thoughts that i have been having scares me. What if i end up left behind. I mean i have no clue what i want to be or do with my life. I know i want to go to college, but i dont think i am smart enof to get in. But even if i am i dont think i could go through with it and and i will ended up drowning because everything will be way over my head. And then even if i can get to college and stuff there is no way i can pay for it. My parents are not given me a dime. I have to make my way through life. And it is so scary to not know what is going to happen. Future, a very stressful thing to think about. But somthing that comes eventually. I wish i was little again, where i had no worrys at all except for the veggies i would have to eat with dinner. I really want to go back to my care free life. But i know that cant happen.

Last year in school i kind of slacked off so to say, and i cant do that again. Sure it was fun, but i cant screw up my future by having fun now. I cant let that happen to me. Or at least i am going to try the best i can not to let that happen.
*sighs* everything is so complicated why does it have to be like this?

6 people who kissed me | Kiss me!

:: 2003 19 July :: 11.57 pm
:: Mood: devious

hehehehehe

ive been a bad bad girl.....
Nick your dare is gettin me in more trouble. but i am startin to like trouble..

Muwahahahaha
Muwahahahaha
ha

3 people who kissed me | Kiss me!

:: 2003 19 July :: 11.10 pm
:: Mood: amused

Today
Alright today was a fun day! I have had a great day! I woke up went to Steven's house for like 20 min not even, cause his mom was home... so you know dont want to be by the el bitcho madre! Then me and pam went back to my house and went on the computer for a while... while we where babysittin my brother. Then i went out to find him Steven came over while i was gone for like 10 min and was in my house with pam when i got home. Then we all hung out in my computer room for a while then my parents got home and he went home around 5 30. Then came back around 7:00. Then next thing i knew it Ben Jackie and Nick where here! We all hung out and it was a blast. Except for my dad.. he is a little paranoid so to say. Yeah But other then that it was great. But sorry Nick and Ben again for my dad buggin u guys so to say.

And Nick dont worry about my dad. You have nothing to be scared of. He wont hurt you he is just being him. You dont have to worry. Well i got to go. love you all
Jess~
Chow

1 people who kissed me | Kiss me!

:: 2003 18 July :: 12.07 pm
:: Mood: satisfied

alright i am kind of bored now. i am waiting for my parents to get home. it seems like it is takin forever. if anybody wants they can call me and chat. sorry can you tell i am really that bored. But i am extremely tired which makes no sence what so ever because i went to bed early last night. 1 am.. tha is the earlyist i have been going to sleep in a long time. well i guess i better go although i have nothin better to do. So talk to you all later.
luv ya
Chow

1 people who kissed me | Kiss me!

:: 2003 17 July :: 10.04 pm
:: Mood: mellow

alright! Oh my goodness the last past 2 weeks have been great. Because for one thing tah twas my main summer break! i did not have to babysit my brother and wake up early although i did anyway especially when my family was out. but it did not bug me that much. I have been having a blast on my 2 weeks off. Although i am a little sleep deprieved but that is ok because this is my only 2 weeks with out my brother! but i think i am goin bowling tomorrow! YEY! doesnt that sound like so much fun. it does to me. i am a bowlin freak. love to bowl, i mean i am even on a bowling leage!

Yeah well anyway this girl here is so completly exhausted! I think i could go to sleep right now and sleep through a full day, But what is the fun in that right? Well sorry if i have not been able to see you all that much lately. i have been super busy with a bunch of different stuff. But i hope you are havin a great summer. I love you all
Chow!

2 people who kissed me | Kiss me!

:: 2003 17 July :: 3.22 am
:: Mood: tired

time to sleep
alright it is some where around 3 in the morning oh wait it is about 3 30! Never mind i am tired i dont think i will be able to pull an all nighter... oh well thogh i guess that is not such a bad thing i guess. i mean i am going to go golfing to morrow. which is always a fun thing to do. so yeah i have been really busy lately partys and babysitting other peoples kids havin friends and family over all teh time. im sorry if i have not been ablet o talk to you alot lately but i have been super busy. With a bunch of different stuff. Yeah well everybody is sleepin an i am the last to fall asleep so i guess i might as well get some rest now. i mean i dont want to have no energy for tomorrow or wel ljust teh weekend tah tis. So love you all
Chow!

2 people who kissed me | Kiss me!