robbingnovember
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2003 29 November :: 5.45pm
What was that????!!!
ps. someone has a crush on me. oh the funniness <3
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robbingnovember
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2003 27 November :: 6.54pm
:: Mood: content
:: Music: third eye blind <33
I wanted to thank you for a vision that was lost that you returned
I'm really good right now. I have this urge to write a really nice entry about how i love all of my friends, which i really do. Ah all of you guys are so much fun and i just can't imagine life without any of you. Dammit ha. Last night was so fun.. and so was the night before that. I bursting forth with all this love for everyone.. which is good. This is how i get when im semi happy. I'm just in one of those i love everyone moods. Woo because its lasted for more then an hour. Sorry if i forget anyone:
Dana: thanks for always having my back and making me laugh nonstop because we are so crazy together
Stacey: thanks for being great. ha damn you are so fun and i know i can turn to you when i have a problem
Sara: thanks for having faith in me.. no matter what (you make me feel forever worthwhile) and taking over the world with me
Ryan: thanks for being my BFF!!!! <33333 haa oh man no really you are too fun and insightful. your theories amuse me YEAH
Karin: math buddy for LIFE. but dude very level headed and i like your opinions and talking and cruising with you while listening to crazy emo music. and yogurt <33333
Jon: best husband. you are so crazy and your antics amuse me. you always make me smile
Paige: oldies + paige + car= fun i love our conversations and your fresh outlook on things and your outgoing bubbliness. fun parties and muffins <3
Allison: thanks for still being optimistic and great at lunch. always full of stories and i know you would be there for me. soccer mom
Sam: you're full of imagination and i never get bored. very caring. thank you
deena: my very own library buddy. We've become pretty close and its very awesome that we can talk about everything and save eachothers grades. Tecumseh!
adam: very nice and i love how you're an eternal optimist. you have a great capacity for love and you care a lot about people so thanks
harry: so sweet and funny, even though it took awhile for everyone to warm up to eachother. very fun.
Erika: i love that i met you this summer. you are sooo funn!!!! ahhhhh amazing
Jason: love this kid. just the nicest person i know. i wish him all the happiness in the world
Neil: thanks for being nice and talking to me and being funny and crazy and TRYINGTO KILL ME!!!!
Steven: you crack me up. and you are amazing. plain and simple. <3
Amy: thanks for making me laugh and being one of the funniest people ever created. wish i talked to you more but your still that cool <3
cari: thanks for being so nice and crazy and accompanying sara and i to the shows. your company is priceless
thanks to anyone who has ever made me smile, because everything counts. I really do think everyone is so great and i really hope i havent forgotten anyone it isnt intentional. Most of the poeple on this don't even read my journal.. eh. I just want to put how i feel out there.. i could say so much more. People cant be summed up in a few lines. But still I'm very content and i feel so great for knowing such special people and i felt it needed to be acknowledged
have a wonderful thanksgiving
oh yes and i love my family too, for what would thanksgiving be without them <3
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orfwashere
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2003 27 November :: 12.14am
:: Mood: relaxed
:: Music: Spring Heeled Jack
Mmm... Thanksgiving
by far, the greatest holiday.
For the last seven years, it's involved waking up, putting on a pair of shorts, eating within a half hour of waking up, watching football, and falling asleep while watching football.
[Greatest Holiday Ever]
I hope somebody got that. Anyway.... I got accepted into FAU yesterday at the on-site deal. Definately a sad day for college admissions. It wasn't even a decision. She just looked at my SAT score and gave me an instant yes. Didn't even look at my application. Wasn't interested in community service hours (which I have none of) or my essay (which I didn't write). Didn't even care that I'm sitting at a 2.6 GPA. Apparently colleges calculate grade point averages differently, and all the honors and ap classes I've taken bring it up to around a 3.1. That led her to tell me that I'm eligable for a scholarship, and would most likely revcieve a whopping $2500 from them. The fact that I won't get Bright Futures makes that money almost as valuable as gold... or rather platinum. It's a nice deal, but I'm still somewhat disturbed by how that school is impressed with me. For real, me.... come on. It really makes me not want to go there, but it's comforting to know I have a fall-back option if I don't get accepted to a school I really want to go to.
Well thats the positive part of what I had to say. I'll save the negative for after the holiday. I'm not in the mood to be depressed. Whatever sense that last sentence makes.... well I don't know. Enough
-A.J.
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bocaheath05
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2003 26 November :: 9.13pm
Today was my typical "weekend day" I went to the mall with Amy and didn't buy anything. I went to the library as well, got 2 books. The perks of being a wallflower and some book by carl hiaasen, hopefully it is good, I've read all his adult books.
Tomorrow is Thanksgiving, and I am looking forward to the Macy's Day Paade. And as I think about it, it's kinda stupid, people look forward to soemthing where massive ballons shaped like cartoons are pulled down a big street in New York, but then again, I watch it,. I was also thinking that I can drive ( kind of) because I have my permit. It's rather strnge to think that in a year I will own a car. But I'm just babbling. Blah Blah Blah!
I am going to go read some more and eat ice cream ( YES!! gota love ice cream)
much <3 love
Heather
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adiosesposito
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2003 24 November :: 11.55pm
:: Music: king geedorah
As the Thanksgiving holiday is almost upon us, I seem to be happier on the outside and more and more depressed on the inside. It's really pathetic why, but of course I've fallen victim to the number one source of depression in white males ages 12-18 who get good grades and don't do drugs: girls. For awhile I was clean- I didn't really have a yearning for the comfort of another. Relationships in high school seemed to be pointless to me, and I've never been one to indulge in one-night stands just to get a slice. I was jonesin for a girl near the end of the last school year, but summer kind of made me stop craving for her or anyone.
But over the last few months, that hankering for a girl has come back. See, it would be easier for me if it was various girls who popped in my mind as possibilities to date, but more and more it has become one girl again, the same one from last year. And it is ever-so slowly killing my soul.
I retract my earlier comment, about how I thought relationships in high school were pointless. One of the problems I have is I don't want to date a girl just for a short period of time-even say three months. I want to build a relationship, I think. I want to be able to have someone to call on nights like these when I'm bored and know how their day went. I want to be able to have someone to call on nights when I wasn't bored, when I had a great deal of work, yet all I wanted to hear is how their day went. I want to be able to spend my friday nights, every week, doing something with someone, be it watching her favorite movies or going to some bad Japanese restaurant. I want to have a reason to buy a 5 foot tall teddy bear on some random day just because it was their birthday. I realize now that I've being saying someone, but in truth, for me right now, it's just one girl.
I know they don't want to be mentioned in my journal, but just using them as a case example, I want a relationship akin to Holly and Andrew's. They are best friends, they can make fun of each other, but most importantly, they seem to share some interests and truly seem to love each other, if love can be found at such a young age. Maybe the main reason I've never had a girlfriend, looks aside, is that I've never found a girl who I truly shared interests with. There hasn't been a girl that I just thought to myself "Wow, we are perfect for each other." I know that there is a girl out there who listens to the same bands I listen to, loves the same movies I do, and thinks the Bengals are actually a pretty darn good football team; however, I have not found that girl as of yet. As John Cusack said in High Fidelity, all of the above things do matter, in contrast to what some people may think.
So I gave up on finding a girl who shared many similar interests with me. Everything was going great, and then I had to find a pretty girl like her. Sure,there are girls who I've found hotter or sexier, but I don't know, I guess she seems to be different. Sort of like an enigma, wrapped in a mystery, if you'd like me to wax faux-intellectual. It took me so long to just say I like her, as I always tried to go around that word. I don't know why I like her, I don't know why she's different from other quiet cuties, I don't know why I can't find any courage to talk to her; it's just reality for me as of now. Seriously, I feel ashamed of myself, whining about it to my friends, making something as frivolous as talking to a girl seem so important, so life or death. I mean, she knows I like her, and it's basically up to me to do anything about it. Yet, everyday I say I'm going to do something about it, I say I'm going to talk to her after school, but alas, it never happens. Excuses are made on my part, but they all add up to me being just pathetic.
So as it stands right now, I am a failure, when it comes to girls at least. Maybe I should let other girls on to my radar. Or maybe I should stop being such a waste of a man and show some initiative and stop putting off the one thing I want to do until it's too late. Whatever the right thing is, and in my mind and heart, I know the latter is the right thing, but whatever the right thing is, to paraphrase Legends of the Hidden Temple, the choice is mine and mine alone.
Drew R.
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plainmornings
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2003 24 November :: 10.59pm
::15 Random Favorites:: | 1: | Elvis | 2: | Baby Kitty | 3: | Ms. Princy | 4: | Gatitio | 5: | Princess Sophia | 6: | Baby Elvis/Whiskers | 7: | Scardey baby kitty | 8: | Cindy woo hoo | 9: | Layla | 10: | bananas | 11: | pancakes | 12: | pictures | 13: | happy faces | 14: | polka dots | 15: | happy dances | ::14 Favorite Foods:: | 1: | pancakes | 2: | bananas | 3: | palomilla | 4: | tacos | 5: | cheese | 6: | ice cream | 7: | twizzlers | 8: | gummi bears | 9: | heath | 10: | hershey with almonds | 11: | mints | 12: | hard candy | 13: | cinnamon | 14: | cheesecake | ::13 Most Watched Shows:: | 1: | Trading Spaces | 2: | a dating story | 3: | a makeover story | 4: | a wedding story | 5: | trading spaces family | 6: | survivor (shut up) | 7: | the bachelor (shut up again) | 8: | the nanny | 9: | gilmore girls | 10: | queer eye for the straight guy | 11: | room raiders | 12: | one tree hill | 13: | unwrapped | ::12 Good Bands in your Opinion:: | 1: | hot hot heat | 2: | smashing pumpkins | 3: | coheed and cambria | 4: | thursday | 5: | the postal service | 6: | radiohead | 7: | beck | 8: | bush | 9: | bright eyes | 10: | pretty girl makes graves | 11: | from autumn to ashes | 12: | sevendust | ::11 Memories:: | 1: | show at the factory | 2: | surprise visits | 3: | 4am visits | 4: | twins twins twins | 5: | the "shack" | 6: | warped tour | 7: | melting pan. yes. pan | 8: | frozen pizzas & movies | 9: | pictures | 10: | pancakes | 11: | party party party! | ::10 Close Friends:: | 1: | Jizzennifer | 2: | Ashy Stockey | 3: | Bright Lite | 4: | Stephy | 5: | Kevy Wevy | 6: | Gregory Luke <3 | 7: | Princy | 8: | Lo Wang | 9: | the triangle. | 10: | Jess/Heidi/Sam/Dave. yes all in one. | ::09 Things you're looking forward to:: | 1: | end of school | 2: | after IB exams | 3: | after IB | 4: | end of everything | 5: | birthday.mine. | 6: | ashleys wedding | 7: | cheesecake | 8: | after tomorrow | 9: | something cool. | ::08 Things you wear daily:: | 1: | bra | 2: | underwear | 3: | heart necklace | 4: | murano glass star | 5: | jizz's ring (i try to) | 6: | sweater | 7: | shirt | 8: | pants of some sort | ::07 Things That Annoy You:: | 1: | aware ignorant people | 2: | people who drive slow in the left lane | 3: | people who don't listen | 4: | old people on the road | 5: | jeb bush | 6: | fucking republicans | 7: | everything. | ::06 Things You Touch Everyday:: | 1: | cell phone | 2: | car keys | 3: | computer | 4: | brush | 5: | princy | 6: | myself? | ::05 Movies You Could Watch Over and Over:: | 1: | empire records | 2: | vanilla sky | 3: | being john malkovich | 4: | dangerous lives of alter boys | 5: | 10 ways to lose a guy | ::04 Of Your Favorite Childhood Toys:: | 1: | my little pony | 2: | talking sesame street characters | 3: | barbies | 4: | trolls | ::03 People You Have Kissed:: | 1: | Gregory | 2: | Princy | 3: | Brighton :0P | ::02 Of Your Favorite Songs:: | 1: | Smashing Pumpkins version of Landslide | 2: | Smashing Pumpkins - Mayonaise | ::01 Person You Could Spend the Rest of Your Life With:: | 1: | Princy <3 |
Countdown brought to you by BZOINK!
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robbingnovember
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2003 20 November :: 9.45pm
it breaks my heart to see jason like this. i don't know what im going to do.
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robbingnovember
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2003 18 November :: 9.49pm
'I liked you too much I used to be attracted to boys who would lie to me and think solely about themselves and
you were plenty self-destructive for my taste at the time I used to say the more tragic the better the truth is whenever I think of the early 90's your face comes up with a vengeance like it was yesterday'- alanis
note to self: stop because you are definately not ahead and you never will be so why waste precious time?
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plainmornings
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2003 17 November :: 6.30pm
whos a baller...
guess who won a $100 gift certificate towards a tattoo.
yup that would be me.
did you know that the Lion King is one of the top 9 most rented VHS's of all time :0)
---------------------------------------------
UF audition was decent.
fingers crossed. necessity. school sucks.
the end.
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orfwashere
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2003 14 November :: 11.55pm
1290
....I guess I should be happy.
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robbingnovember
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2003 14 November :: 10.19pm
:: Mood: hellish
I wish no one in my place
fuck. I am so sick of myself. verge of throwing up. I'm about to have another anxiety attack again. I just feel so helpless all the time. All i do is drift around, a shell of my former self (which wasnt that great to begin with). I dont even see the point of existing. and i thought i could avoid crying tonight. I just want to be normal like everyone else and be happy. I don't even see a light in the tunnel.. it's pitch black for miles. Maybe it's just a cave, not a tunnel at all. I don't even see the point of making an effort, because i know i can't get better on my own. I'm so fucking exhausted. I'm not mad at anyone at all. It's not anyones fault.. it's mine for being who i am. I hate being me. I hate it. I abhor it. I am the most vile creature on this planet and i deserve exactly what i get.
said it's not your fault and you've been good to me. it's just lately i've been feeling like i dont belong, like the grounds not mine to walk upon
-----
[later:.. yeah im working my way towards recovery.. one step at a time. ill go to sleep feeling okay today]
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bocaheath05
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2003 11 November :: 8.42pm
:: Music: Paranoid Android - Radiohead
Not much is new in my life, although I got my pictures from homecoming week back, and to all, I LOVE them!! The people that dressed up made them work. I went to a super wal-mart to get them developed, it was like Atlantic, so haitian!
Today was very nice, I relaxed, went for tons of chinese food with my mother, and I talked to my Alex from Tallahassee, oh what a nice day.
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plainmornings
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2003 11 November :: 5.54pm
i had an oober good *extended* weekend :0)
man. i sure do hate him and still wish he'd die a slow, torturing death.
anyone? think of someone from the past year of my life (not gregory) who i like ohhh so much.
my twins i highly disapprove.
poor.
history internal assessment here i come.
::sigh::
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adiosesposito
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2003 10 November :: 10.57pm
:: Music: Sigur Ros
Girls, I was hot in 89.
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plainmornings
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2003 9 November :: 8.10pm
okay okay.
FRIDAY.
~ saw Gregory Luke right after school <3
~ senior recognition night SEE!
~ game vs. Boca we WON! exciting game, 41-37 was the final score, it was supeeerr close. scary.
okay. this is when it begins to suck.
*after the game, Greg and I went to Dennys on Linton & Federal. i ordered a cherry coke and buffalo chicken strips. I get the stuff, cut up a piece, feed it to greg & take a bite myself. I took a bite and was all like "man, this doesn't have the same consistancy of chicken" I begin to analyze the chicken only to find that its completely raw! i spit it out and got the waiter. He went to take it back or whatever and I told Greg i wasn't in the mood for chicken anymore so he went and told the guy to get us a caramel apple crisp. It was okay. the guy brought our check and what they did was subtracted the apple crisp from the price of the chicken (which was more then the crisp was alone) and i was like "wtf." wouldn't you think that i should get it for free i mean they tried to kill me w/salmanila for Gods sake. So i ask to see the manager and hes a total douche bag and this fucking big ass black bitch next to me is all obnoxious so greg was all pissed off and was like "fuck it, lets go" and we just walked out. ANGRY!
will never go back to dennys on Federal & Linton or Federal & Woolbright ever again.
SATURDAY
ummmm woke up around 10, ate breakfast, practiced bassoon & went over to Gregs.
We made cookies & chilled. Went to the mall & he got a haircut (its okay... a little short for my taste but its all Elvis-y now.) Went to Petsmart and saw kitties for adoption, got bitched out by the lady "young adopters are the worst, they have babies and return the cats". alright. um. gregs dad made an oober good meal & we just chilled. I ended up staying the night so that was cool.
oh man. we went to see TIMB at One Cup at a Time last night! it rocked. It was some girls sweet 16 so it was kinda improv like a jam session but mad props to us!! MINI BLUM was there! that made me mucho happy :0)
SUNDAY
woke up early & stared at Gregory sleep kissing him all over till he woke up. went to church con his padres & his dad made us kick ass pancakes. after church we hit up the boynton ale house and greg lost $10 in pool. oh. and his removed uncles girlfriend (ditzy blonde bitch) said that i looked like i was 12. i wanted to tell her to eat shit and dig her stupid blonde head up her ass. went back to his house, watched tv and his dad made kick ass home made pepperoni balls and pizza. i went home then.
gregorys coming over in a couple hours to bring me cake :0) thats all for now.
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