<marquee>i LoVeD dEePeR aNd I sPoKe SwEeTeR</marquee>

i LoVeD dEePeR aNd I sPoKe SwEeTeR

:: 2004 3 July :: 11.36pm
:: Mood: pessimistic again..
:: Music: 97.7

why don't I feel close with them anymore..

I dunno why but I don't feel as close as I used to be with any of my friends anymore..
I dunno when it started but it's some random feeling..
I've had times when I've been closer with one of them than the rest.. but never a feeling that I wasn't closer to one more than the other.. like I'm not close to any of them. maybe it's because I'm just starting to not understand myself anymore..

ever since the last day of school..and when liz got in trouble, I feel like I'm starting to fall apart. I'm always so pessimistic about everything... like everyones out to get me.

all I ever did all day when Liz was grounded was sit around.. and think of everything thats wrong with me and all my problems.. I have a feeling thats not a good thing. I go out more now but I dunno I don't feel like I'm needed by anyone anymore. I've also gotten really depressed lately everytime I come down from being high, I dunno what it is.. but it's not good. And I can't talk to anyone about it... there's no one there

Happy 4th tomorrow

4 ...iTs 5 O'cLoCk... | ...SoMeWhErE...

SnOwFlAkEa4

:: 2004 3 July :: 9.52pm

What attracts people to you?
brought to you by Quizilla

2 ...iTs 5 O'cLoCk... | ...SoMeWhErE...

krazykelc1

:: 2004 3 July :: 12.32pm
:: Mood: pessimistic

*Angelina-Forever

I never met a person quite like you
Someone that makes me feel loved
I wanna be the one that you are thinking of
The one that brightens your day
Because there's nobody else
That can do the things you do
Forever, I'll be there for you
So when you feel the need to love
Let me be the one you're thinking of
Because I will make it so right

Forever (forever) and ever (and ever)
I will always be there for you
Forever (forever) and ever (and ever)
I will always be there for you baby
I promise

I got to tell you what I feel in my heart
I wrote this song jus to say
No one's ever gonna love me
Nobody but you
I'm yours from this very day
Cause there's nobody else
That can make me feel the way you do
I promise I'll always be true
So when you feel the need to love
Let me be the one you're thinking of
Because I will make it so right

Forever (forever) and ever (and ever)
I will always be there for you
Forever (forever) and ever (and ever)
I will always be there for you baby

I promise.

...SoMeWhErE...

krazykelc1

:: 2004 3 July :: 12.29am
:: Mood: restless
:: Music: Blink182-Down

bah wtf

I am mad once again...my day was going fine til I got high n for some reason it ruined everything..

I smoked a half pack of cigarettes in the last 2 and a half hours cuz im having like a panic attack or something.

and now I'm eating like a dozen ice pops... I need to calm down and go to sleep or something and stop trying to THINK.

I'm out

...SoMeWhErE...

silentcriez

:: 2004 2 July :: 2.16pm
:: Mood: amused
:: Music: fairy tales x jojo

go me :-)

i just got photoshop :-)
thank you gabe

haha im having so much fun with it i made my background and my icon im obsessed with it :-) haha ask me if youw ant me to make you something cuz i will im having fun with it haha im such a geek

well im gonna go work out and then get ready to meet up with my lizzzy and kelsey

mwahhhhhhhhhhhh

<3 Manda

1 ...iTs 5 O'cLoCk... | ...SoMeWhErE...

krazykelc1

:: 2004 1 July :: 10.55pm
:: Mood: satisfied
:: Music: punk rock princess

everyone reading my latest entries is gonna think I have fricken bipolar or something...

well I went to go meet robbie on elmwood @ like.. 9:30 cause I needed to get everything out that I wrote in that last entry.. it's not doing any good rambling on in my journal about it if he doesn't know..

but anyways I feel so much better now, I really needed to let all of that out.

I just dunno though I can't trust him or anyone anymore, too much shit has happened thats made me lose faith in everything I once had

krazykelc 1: i am the kind of person who always tells theirself to take every chance at happyness though
krazykelc 1: like i would rather take a chance n get hurt
krazykelc 1: like i have before.. then go thru life wondering wat would have happened if i didnt do it
x we4k inside: yeah i no :-\ me too
krazykelc 1: no matter how much i hurt in the end..
krazykelc 1: cuz i know i will always recover
krazykelc 1: and i will still have memories
x we4k inside: aw :-(
x we4k inside: yeah exactly

...SoMeWhErE...

krazykelc1

:: 2004 1 July :: 8.39pm
:: Mood: angry
:: Music: Jagged Edge-Walked outta heaven

bahhhhhhh!

god damn..

why am I so mad, he didn't do anything..
but it's the fact that he doesn't fucking do anything that makes me fucking pissed. He knows I love him it's not like I have to prove somethin to him...
he's the one who needs to show me that he means what he says

and the fact that he wastes his time telling me stuff that is obviously bs.. n then cant even talk to me about it in person without me dragging him away to do so?

ahhhhhh I can't take it anymore, if you loved me you would know how to act around me.. so obv YOU DON'T

you wanna know why I act like a bitch? it's cause you're an asshole..

hah yet I still love you anyway

...SoMeWhErE...

krazykelc1

:: 2004 1 July :: 11.29am
:: Mood: frustrated
:: Music: Matchboox Romance-Tiger Lily

I don't want to speak these words. cause I, don't want to make things anyworse.

we drive tonight,
and you are by my side.
We're talking about our lives,
like we've known each other forever.
the time flies by,
with the sound of your voice.
its close to paradise,
with the end surely near.
and if I could only stop the car
and hold onto you,
and never let go...
I'll never let go.
as we round the corner
to your house
you turned to me and said,
"I'll be going through withdrawl of you for this one night we have spent."
and, I want to speak these words
but I guess I'll just bite my tongue,
and accept "someday, somehow"
as the words that we'll hang from.

and I... don't want to speak these words.
cause I, don't want to make things anyworse.

why does tonite, have to end?
why don't we hit restart,
and pause it at our favorite parts.
we'll skip the goodbyes.
if I had it my way,
I'd turn the car around and runaway,
just you and I.

and I... don't want to speak these words.
cause I, don't want to make things anyworse.

...SoMeWhErE...

SnOwFlAkEa4

:: 2004 30 June :: 9.12pm
:: Mood: content
:: Music: idk

making plans with lauren for tomorrow
now saras gone to ohio
and he is still gone
i have about 10 days left for each of them
siiigh
i have to dog sit tomorrow
july i have alot of company coming from home
ok thats it bye

...SoMeWhErE...

silentcriez

:: 2004 30 June :: 1.17pm

i stare into your empty eyes
reflecting only me
i watch as they glide across my skin
and onto my glistening chest
peach skin melting into every one of your desires
every one of my emotions boil over
into this lust in the air
consuming all of me
breath it in and hold me
touch me, kiss me
kill me sweetly with your stare
those eyes that peirce my skin
looking beyond my clothing
sinking far beyond the boundries of cotton
of lace
of sheets
shoot me with your venom
consume me with a kiss
and carress my smooth creamy skin
with one touch
your kiss it drives me crazy
and we melt between the sheets
reliving every reoccuring night
mirroring every emotion spilt onto paper
caught in a moment in time
in a picture
in a memory
of only me
reflecting in your eyes

i really question if i should like a guy ever again.. its really a lost cause why dont we just skip past all the lies and get right to my heart breaking dammit. eveyrtime someonem is happy its just ripped away from them its not fair.. i mean i hate to be hurt but i hate seeing ppl i care about hurt more...

becuase i want so much to help them and i want so much just to make everything go away but theres nothing i can do or say that would ever make it right. i just wish that guys could see things from our point of view.. see what its like to get used, to get hurt, to get your heart broken.. it feels like shit and maybe if it happened tothem theyd understand... erg

i just pray that someday these little boys grow up.. and finally understand how to treat a girl, how to love, and how to handle a relationship.. i wonder if they ever will and if we will always be submissive to them and their wants.. and if we will ever stand up for ourselves.. i dont get it.. just quit hurting my friends... just grow up...

grrr

AbandonedApril35: i ahd the weirdesy dream
x we4k inside: about wat
AbandonedApril35: i had this dream that we were downtown except our downtown was much bigger and had a big waterfall and a bridge n stuff and we were walking around it and my dad bought us a handle of vodka so we were gonna drink it but didnt yet so we were walking around and then we decided we needed someplace to stay so we walked into hollys house and slept on her kitchen table lol and she woke up and saw us there and was like um what are you doing.. and then we left and ppl were looking for us becuz we had vodka and the cops were after us or something so we hid it somewhere and then i got separated from you guys and you were all ahead and in some big dome or like town hall thing and i somehow got the vodka back and climbed out hollys window and got to the townhall thing where u guys were and then i dont remember what happened

2 ...iTs 5 O'cLoCk... | ...SoMeWhErE...

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