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krazykelc1

:: 2004 26 July :: 3.44pm

6 MONTH PROBATION

nooo community service

--girls we got off easy...

3 .from you. | .to me.


silentcriez

:: 2004 26 July :: 3.37pm

Wise men say only fools rush in
but I can't help falling in love with you
Shall I stay
would it be a sin
If I can't help falling in love with you

Like a river flows surely to the sea
Darling so it goes
some things are meant to be
take my hand, take my whole life too
for I can't help falling in love with you

Like a river flows surely to the sea
Darling so it goes
some things are meant to be
take my hand, take my whole life too
for I can't help falling in love with you
for I can't help falling in love with you

.to me.


krazykelc1

:: 2004 25 July :: 8.43pm
:: Mood: bored
:: Music: shyne-more or less

plans for this week..
tomorrow I have court with meg and emily at 2.. I'm scared.

then Tuesday morning I leave for Maine...
it will probly be nice to get away from here.. but boring too. and something bad always happens wen I leave town... I noticed that.

I'll be back Friday probly mid-afternoon I dunno..

but call/txt/IM my phone anytime..
with my new plan I have free nationwide and no long distance so knock your socks off

617-957-6377
kissme6377

adios:]

1 .from you. | .to me.


silentcriez

:: 2004 25 July :: 2.28pm
:: Music: i really miss you x s club seven.. yeah thats right


ok so...

do you know what its liek to meet this guy.. and hes totally perfect fro you and you know he is and you just lose yourself in his eyes and wanan curl up tight in his arms and just never leave them...its like theres just something that your missing form yourself that they have.. that just liek clicks when ur near them.. when you talk to them.. when you touch them...its liek theres a venom in his words that just make you melt..its like he barely even has to try to make you happy.. just beign there makes everything ok.. ah im not making any sense im just rambling.. but thats who i feel and it sucks cuz everything cam crashing down when my fucking pms took control and made me jealous and suspicious of my best friend.. wtf is wrong with me.. it just seemed like she liked him and i know that he would go for her too.. and i was jealous that she wouldnt even mean it but he would fall for her instead of me and this is teh first time ive actually put myself on teh lien to get hurt in such a long time and it would just suck if the first time i did it i get my heart squashed...its liek im constantly paranoid of rejection and deciet i feel like i cant trust anyone with the way ive been brought up... back stabbed by my own fuycking mother.,. i guess i cant blame all of my issues on her cuz thats stupid im teh oen who inevitable has to make the choices.. but i cant help but think that my decisions have been swayed by her faults...its like building a big tower... that your so proud of.. and then having someone knock it down in front of you...i dont know what to do.. should i give up? cuz i made a big thing over nothing hes prolly not gonna want anything to do with me anymore..i doubt he would have even liked me anyways.. im nothing special...

write more later...

.to me.


cocopuff

:: 2004 25 July :: 11.58am
:: Mood: cranky
:: Music: Maroon 5-"She Will Be Loved"

HOLY FUCK


>>I dont mind spending every day<<
>> Out on your conner in the pooring rain<<


OMG!!! lol i havent written in this thing in sooooooooo long!! lol well ther is a reason on the last day of school i got busted for being drunk and trying to sleep at kelcs... lol and since then myu parents took my computer for a whole fuckign mounth meaning i got it back on the 17th.... but i didn't becasue i was in maine wiht brittany for twoo weeks.. and i just got home yesterday so i decited i would write in here now...


there was sooo much stuff that happend since i didnt write in here... like ummmmmmm MY BIRTHDAY!!! lol it was very fun!! my rents let me out for the day and i went to mandas and Kelc and katie and jess were thee hahahah i love them sooo much!!!!!!!! and i got to go out a few days 2 but i had to b in at fucking 8 which was bull shit but w/e now im off and i have my compuert and im soo excited!!!

and while i was in maine i missed Kelcs birthday and if i had my comp there would have beeen a entry that said somehting liek this:

HAPPY BIRTHDAY KELC I LOVE U SOOOOO MUCH!!! its ur first birthday since i met u(and i have to b in maine :( )and im very happy i met u!!! and i love u to death!!! i hope u have(had) and awesome birthday!!!

lol yes im weird but im trying to get to everythign i missed... and at this point i ant remeber nething else... so... yea... im done....

oh yes and im gonann fix this mess... i hope u like it lol

<3Lizzy

2 .from you. | .to me.


xonixieox

:: 2004 24 July :: 9.31pm
:: Mood: amused
:: Music: pieces of me

TRACIIII
well this whole week has been me and traci!!! YAY TRACIIIIIII

so manny jokessss soooo little time... lol

"Mama Dukes"
"Nikkie Traci Traci Traci NikkiE NikkiEEE"
"sooo many CHINKZ"
"stalker boy"
CHAD MICHEAL MURRAY is my boyfriend... just tot let everyone kno that"
"thats a HUGE ass house... no you Dummies thats a school! "lmao
swimming before and after work...then during work!
"would Nikkie And Traci please report to the concession stand!" hhahaha
The WEIRD kid in the water! lmao!
Taras car! lol
"I'm not touching you .. youre touching me!"

Good times good times! i love traci

<3 NikkiE

.to me.


silentcriez

:: 2004 22 July :: 11.59pm

In one single moment your whole life can turn 'round
I stand there for a minute starin' straight into the ground
Lookin' to the left slightly, then lookin' back down
World feels like it's caved in - proper sorry frown
Please let me show you where we could only just be, for us
I can change and I can grow or we could adjust
The wicked thing about us is we always have trust
We can even have an open relationship, if you must
I look at her she stares almost straight back at me
But her eyes glaze over like she's lookin' straight through me
Then her eyes must have closed for what seems an eternity
When they open up she's lookin' down at her feet

Dry your eyes mate
I know it's hard to take but her mind has been made up
There's plenty more fish in the sea
Dry your eyes mate
I know you want to make her see how much this pain hurts
But you've got to walk away now
It's over

So then I move my hand up from down by my side
It's shakin', my life is crashin' before my eyes
Turn the palm of my hand up to face the skies
Touch the bottom of her chin and let out a sigh
'Cause I can't imagine my life without you and me
There's things I can't imagine doin', things I can't imagine seein'
It weren't supposed to be easy, surely
Please, please, I beg you please
She brings her hands up towards where my hands rested
She wraps her fingers round mine with the softness she's blessed with
She peels away my fingers, looks at me and then gestures
By pushin' my hand away to my chest, from hers

Dry your eyes mate
I know it's hard to take but her mind has been made up
There's plenty more fish in the sea
Dry your eyes mate
I know you want to make her see how much this pain hurts
But you've got to walk away now
It's over

And I'm just standin' there, I can't say a word
'Cause everythin's just gone
I've got nothin'
Absolutely nothin'

Tryin' to pull her close out of bare desperation
Put my arms around her tryin' to change what she's sayin'
Pull my head level with hers so she might engage in
Look into her eyes to make her listen again
I'm not gonna fuckin', just fuckin' leave it all now
'Cause you said it'd be forever and that was your vow
And you're gonna let our things simply crash and fall down
You're well out of order now, this is well out of town
She pulls away, my arms are tightly clamped round her waist
Gently pushes me back and she looks at me straight
Turns around so she's now got her back to my face
Takes one step forward, looks back, and then walks away

Dry your eyes mate
I know it's hard to take but her mind has been made up
There's plenty more fish in the sea
Dry your eyes mate
I know you want to make her see how much this pain hurts
But you've got to walk away now
It's over

I know in the past I've found it hard to say
Tellin' you things, but not tellin' straight
But the more I pull on your hand and say
The more you pull away

Dry your eyes mate
I know it's hard to take but her mind has been made up
There's plenty more fish in the sea
Dry your eyes mate
I know you want to make her see how much this pain hurts
But you've got to walk away now.


----

i stand here
in a world of lies
wandering in and out of the lives of many
touching hearts, and hands.
i bleed red blood
and speak white lies
still never knowing the truth
i question greatly
the intentions of others
and constantly doubt my own will,
but each day the sun rises,
and the birds go on chirping
assurring this is my place
the dust will never settle
upon my chin, my chest or my cheek
im wild untamed and misleaded..
i stare out this foggy window,
circles of condensation collect on its pane
looking out into the world
the world full of troubles
and joys,
deaths, and births
irony and such beauty..
i live this life like a magnet
attractling only what i am willing to attract
fending off my dislikes
i stand here
in a world of lies
wandering in and out of the lives of many
touching hearts, and hands.
my heart skips a beat
as i watch this scene drift away into nothingness
and i am nothing but a lost moment in time
a place, no longer to be visited...
a conquerable setting
lived, and thrown aside...
i stare into this scene,
and i watch it drift away..

---


i dont understand everything you make me feel or say
i think of all the problems, but i woudlnt have it any other way
we drift into contact and swiflty drift out
reliving the sways of unconquerable doubt
i sit here awake and its 11 after 4
thinkign about you.. my cher amour
i type this poem, a rythem i drop a line
hoping it will touch you somewhere deep inside
is this not what suits you, do you not like my poetry?
are you not a sucker for kisses and the sweetness of obscurity
call me crazy for this emotion i feel
i met your soul long ago.. its something so real
i question if im sane.. or if what i think is true
i guess i will never know until i act on this to.
the syncrinization of your lips, and my heart
assures me your here, is it soon you shall part?
the feeling i get when you look into my eyes
its like your seeing into me, u see past my lies..
unquestionable doubt overwhelms my whole body
i was starring at you, im not sure if you saw me
would it be too much if i asked you to hold me
if i asked you to kiss, and encompass around me
with the warmth of your arms, youve revived my health
matured within reason, and gained within wealth
my lifeless flesh now pumps blood through these veins
im no longer crazy, im not longer insane
so kiss me again and i swear well stay this way
with the setting of the sun, and a dawn of a new day...

3 .from you. | .to me.


xonixieox

:: 2004 22 July :: 11.03pm

my other entry got deleted and it was better so bear ewith me!

ok well today has been a really bad day and if anyone is ever gunna say they care about me then they better fucking mean it becasue i cant fucking deal with you and all your bullshit!! FUCK OFF!!!


ok so here are the people who i know are here for me! i dont know what i would do if i didnt meet you this year! i couldnt live without you and how you are always here no matter whats going on in your own lives!

the reasons why i love these people!

AMANDA becasue she is the person everyone goes to for advice on anything
LIZZY becasue if you walk into the room with a fake smile on your face she knows someting is wrong
KELSEY becasue she is a serious person who will always make you laugh with her comments and faces!
MEG becasue shes a person you can talk to and know she will listen without interupting you.. and will make something serious funny when she giggles!
KATIE becasue she says thigs that can make you laugh when you need it and things that can make you cry when you need it and she always knows... but shes clueless to other things !LOL
TRACI becasue she is always a phone call away!
JESSIE becasue she wont take shit from anyone if they are messing with her friends!!
And CHRISTINA even tho shes not like part of the little "group" but i love her becasue she is always there for anyone who needs help or to talk.. and she cares!



these are the girls i think i can count on and trust ehnever something is wrong! im actually like crying writing this becasue im thinking back on all of the times when i have needed one of them and all of them are there! i love you girls forever and ever and EVER!

2 .from you. | .to me.


krazykelc1

:: 2004 22 July :: 9.59pm
:: Mood: high as a kite
:: Music: b2k-everything

x3 I love you x3

wait for the boy who will make any ordinary
moment seem magical, the kinda boy who
brings out the best in you & makes you wanna be
a better person, wait for the one who will be your
best friend, who will drop anything to be with you
at anytime, wait for the boy who makes you smile
like no one else and when he smiles you know
he needs you, wait for the boy who wants to show
you off to the world when you are in your sweats
and have no make-up on but appreciates it when
you get all dolled up for him and most of all wait
for the boy who will put you in the center of his
universe-cause that's where you belong <33

.to me.


xonixieox

:: 2004 22 July :: 8.40pm
:: Mood: not really sure
:: Music: ummm some weird comercial

this makes me really really sad!





i guess its because no matter what happens i will always love these girls and i miss them so much! :(

And AMANDA AND LIZZY

(manda took the pic and lizzy went home sick!)


guess thats all i hafta say about it!

Ohhh yesterday was my love KELSEY'S birthday!! i love her sooooooo much so this is for you Kelsey!!...........


.to me.


silentcriez

:: 2004 22 July :: 1.00am

today was miss kelsey elisabeth rose dunnes bday and we had a gather for her :-) robbie jimmy me jessie ashley meggy katie sarah and kelsey of course were there we had fun

I LOVE YOU KELSEY


Your back curves like a creeping vine
with the answers in the fluid in the stem of the spine
In the black-coffee bowl of your eye
why do you overestimate the size of the lie?

I've seen
the dangers of
your rising sign
but i swear
i'd like
to drink the fuel straight from your lighter
it's all inside the wrist, it's
all inside the way you time it
i resent the way you make me like myself

my nerves jump
like a boiling pan
like a skillet full of oil spits,
rattling on the burner
when i stumble onto the thought
of the match you lit and dropped and set the
dial to slow yearn

i've seen
the dangers of
your rising sign
but i swear
i'd like
to drink the fuel straight from your lighter
it's all inside the wrist, it's
all inside the way you time it
i resent the way you make me like myself


can i spell it out?
should i spell it out?

i've seen
the dangers of
your rising sign
but i swear
i'd like
to drink the fuel straight from your lighter
it's all inside the wrist, it's
all inside the way you time it
i resent the way you make me like myself


-----

its like you see into my mind
you read me like a script
speaking each word so fluently
leaving shivers down my spine
as they cascade down my earlobes
melting like a snowflake upon my cheek
or a tear drop flowling solemnly to an imminent death
i cannot grasp the concept yet
of how you make me feel
but my heart beats faster
and i cant help but smile
the biggest smile
its beauty like a rose
the fragrance and sight
bringing tears to my eyes
foreshadowing the joy
the happiness
and the time ticking endlessly
and the light flickering between what should be and what could be
i dont know what to think
see
know...
but i know what i feel
and its something
swayed by the venom in your words
as they cascade down my earlobes
melting like a snowflake upon my cheek

----

^me

nothing ends that doesnt start
llike a rose you are the heart
you often find alone at night
yourself intwined with delight
i see you walking toward the sun
and when we're talking i dont want to ever be done
you light up days shrouded by fear
and never even drop a tear
you contact spirits from above
and help them find their inner love
a juggalette is always hot
but a normal juggalette your surely not
you beat them all with no intention
you suck me in to another dimension
i feel like im floating and thati might just have wings
you are the one who made me feel all of these things
you get the things you certainly need
and deserve it, you do indeed

- derek :-)

.to me.


krazykelc1

:: 2004 21 July :: 11.35pm
:: Mood: happy/exhausted burnt out
:: Music: Mobb Deep-Bounce

July 21



Happy Birthday to Me Tori & Korrie!!



today was fun..Amanda & the girls planned a lil"suprise" party for mee it was fantabulous ;-)


I got a new cell!! I have the same # n shit.. new plan so tonnnss of mins call me up!!

2 .from you. | .to me.


silentcriez

:: 2004 20 July :: 1.19am

KaRt00nNiTeMaRe: jew
BlckTangldHrt35x: fuck you
BlckTangldHrt35x: jew
BlckTangldHrt35x: go jew yourself up the ass
KaRt00nNiTeMaRe: whoa
BlckTangldHrt35x: come on alex you can do it put a little jew into it
KaRt00nNiTeMaRe: what the fuck? this isn't the little jew that could

-----

KaRt00nNiTeMaRe: im sick of everyone tryina be me all the time
KaRt00nNiTeMaRe: being famous and so dashingly good looking, isn't easy
BlckTangldHrt35x: alex
BlckTangldHrt35x: did you have any relatives like uncles or anything who got a divorce?
BlckTangldHrt35x: ?
KaRt00nNiTeMaRe: umm
KaRt00nNiTeMaRe: my uncles black
KaRt00nNiTeMaRe: does that count?
BlckTangldHrt35x: no
KaRt00nNiTeMaRe: oh
BlckTangldHrt35x: did any have a divorce?
KaRt00nNiTeMaRe: he can steal your tv in the middle of the night, and you'd just think it was floating.
BlckTangldHrt35x: seriously did they
KaRt00nNiTeMaRe: umm
KaRt00nNiTeMaRe: i think my black uncles wife and daughter left him after he went back to jail
KaRt00nNiTeMaRe: lmao
KaRt00nNiTeMaRe: how bout that?

---

BlckTangldHrt35x: i love you
KaRt00nNiTeMaRe: oh
KaRt00nNiTeMaRe: i love u too haha

i love alex kaplan!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

.to me.


krazykelc1

:: 2004 20 July :: 12.54am
:: Mood: happy
:: Music: Mobb Deep-Get Away

you'll know hes the right one

when your bad days


..suddenly turn good

1 .from you. | .to me.


krazykelc1

:: 2004 18 July :: 1.09am
:: Mood: tired
:: Music: Twiztid-Your the Reazon

Hell yeah Summer'04



last night (early this morning) kicked ass. It's been so fuckin long since I've gone out durin the night n had that much fun... night swimming n goin to McDonald's at like 3am in the back of a pick-up truck watchin the stars.. it was so awesome I hadn't done nething like that in so long... it was good to do something diff. for a change


the past few days actually have been pretty good..... we took bong rips at karltons cousins house friday.. haven't done that in a long time either. n I also saw Matty I haven't seen him since.... probly before school ended.



well its been a fun weekend.. but I do miss robbie & jimmy :-( I thought I would be hanging out with them the past few days but they never called.. n then tonite Jimmy asked me to go meet him n his nephew so I saw him for a lil

there were plans for tonite.. I thought.. but I'm wicked burnt out n I need to gain back some sleep that I've lost.. so I think I'll do that instead


Bday- 3 days
Court- 7/26
Maine- 7/27 through 7/30

.to me.

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