home | profile | guestbook


.:*Chubby*:.

recent entries | past entries


silentcriez

:: 2004 6 May :: 11.10pm

speak not of death..speak not of pain.. speak not of fear and misscomprehension.. speak not of your sins, and of your forogtten truths, these things you hold self evident.. strip me, i lie flacid im lucid look right through me. your eyes peirce every cell of me, every inch of creamy white skin. and your words penetrate me like the knife, i so mock each and every reoccuring night.. each scream i hear peteating in my head. the person i want to kill lies useless now, boundless and out of my power. they only answer to teh silver.. only respond to the pain.. they only pay attention when im jeaprodizing fate...hurting what could havew been.. or whatever went wrong. but i wont speak of lost promises, secrets which were told, each silver plated lie youve ever spoken.. and this steel penetrates me liek you did that day.. slicing deeper into my infected wounds...you are the birth of pain.. and the death of sorrow... the breeding ground of hate.. and your dreams slice deeper into this blueish looking vein than my glass ever will do...
lifeless.. is the promise of a bond.. useless is the promise of love...and you die nonowing what could have been...what should have been caught between teh wrong and the right.. i cannot choose your fate...but i can choose mine.. and i shall end mine with promptness on teh day you say goodbye..

1 .from you. | .to me.


krazykelc1

:: 2004 5 May :: 4.43pm
:: Mood: satisfied
:: Music: D12-How come

la la la



I jsut finished burning the D-12 World CD its verrry good

!!I am excited for this weekend!!
Meg knows it :o)
Oh how long I have been waiting for this... I'm sure it will be an awesome experience =)

Kum ba yah, Kum ba yah
Kum ba yah, D12, Kum ba yah
D12, Kum ba yah

I take a couple uppers
I down a couple downers
But nothing compares
To these blue and yellow purple pills

I been to mushroom mountain
Once or twice but who's countin
But nothing compares
To these blue and yellow purple pills




I <3 MaJkL*

.to me.


silentcriez

:: 2004 5 May :: 12.19am

www.picturetrail.com/toxiclove35

this blade has danced across this skin plenty of times before... knowing each cell all too well...my own screams wont stifle the pain.. wont rectify each tear falling...i go to press down once again like allways... eveyrthings teh same except this time i think of you... and this blood holds no comfort...

.to me.


krazykelc1

:: 2004 4 May :: 5.45pm
:: Mood: bitchy
:: Music: ICP-Under the Moon

Another New layout...



haha since I have no life and just happen to come across this pretty background I decided to change everything around again.

welll........ not much is new and I have to go work on a fucking essay now for English. ta-ta =)



"Love will die if held too tightly...


...Love will fly if held too lightly"

.to me.


xonixieox

:: 2004 4 May :: 4.08pm
:: Mood: i fucking hate everyone!

i hate them!!
well.... after school was gay becasue SOMEONE thinks they can yell at for no fucking reason... well it pisses me of!!!


.... me and janet and traci are doing the lilja Fair next week... and i missed the bus lol!!

WEll LeT mE sEe.... TrAcI hAs A fUcKiN sTaLkEr!! ItS sO sCaRy!!! aHhHhHhHhHhHhHh

lol!!!!! thas all for now!!!

<3 NixiE


oh and yesterday i went PUDDLE HOPPING!!!!!!!!! YAY!!!!!!!!!

1 .from you. | .to me.


silentcriez

:: 2004 3 May :: 10.30pm


What’s that smell?

There is a cool breeze in the air, sweet nectar caught along its drift. Emotions overflow with beauty, and I watch the pristine buds rock back and forth. On a perfect summer day, all is awake and indulging nature to its fullest extent. I walk along a rigid path of thorns and ferns, to my surprise tempting me further into the forest by a sweet smell. It remained sugary and radiant as it enticed my senses, dancing upon my nostrils and tempting my tongue, after every breath I’d take. What is this scent which toggles my mind, and pulls me into this forest of echoes and vacant melodies? Nature creating its own orchestra, equipped with birds, wind, and the chirping of the summer crickets. Each its own part, in harmony, in its own subconscious beat drawn together by that fragrance. That simple aroma, the smell of warm rain accompanied by heat lightning. Or the perfume of a single flower soaking in each golden ray of sunlight. Finally, the scent I speak of becomes stronger, and it overwhelms me. With a tingle down my spine, I turn a corner overgrown with wild roses and untamed beauty, to see life at its best. A meadow, overflowing with wildflowers, and dandelions. There is a cool breeze in the air, sweet nectar caught along its drift. Emotions overflow with beauty, and I watch the pristine buds rock back and forth.

1 .from you. | .to me.


krazykelc1

:: 2004 3 May :: 4.31pm
:: Mood: lonely
:: Music: Chicago-Will you still love me



"If you love somebody, let them go. If they return, they were always yours. If they don't, they never were."


my heart lost all control.... now you're all that I know
....I can't go on if I'm on my own.....



Take me as I am, put your hand in mine
Now & Forever

Every road leads to your door, every step I take, forever more..

Take me as I am, put your heart in mine
Stay with me forever

Will you still love me for the rest of your life?

4 .from you. | .to me.


krazykelc1

:: 2004 2 May :: 10.31pm
:: Mood: accomplished
:: Music: Dark Lotus-Jump off

New Layout!



Heeyyy... While everyones at the Dark Lotus concert I decided I would do something productive =) ...like fixing my journal. I got this background from Meg hope you like... I still need to find an icon to match but ya.


Nothin's really knew.... nothin no1 hasn't already heard about. I'm still deciding whether I want to do Woodtrail this summer or not... it's been on my mind lately because I need to write the essay within the next day or so if I decide I wanna do it... I need to get my community service done but I dunno I hate little kids so I don't know if thats how I wanna do it.......

help? any ideas let me know




ttyl.






.to me.


cocopuff

:: 2004 2 May :: 10.12am
:: Mood: amused
:: Music: Akon- "Locked up"

ur soo dumb for waateing ur tiem fighting over somehtign soo GAY!

ok manda and kelsey how long have u been friends!!?? serously! both of u get over it!! kelesy ur a hypicrat and u knwo it and all manda was doing was showing u that u were and that that was gay, and manda u shouldn't have dragged other thigns into this one problem because ut made this sucha a big deal over ntohing... soo ur both wrong get over it... and its not neone else busness soo kelsye ur littel friend needs to watch what she says cuz last nigth i was ready to kcik her ass soo next tiem im nto even gonan hesatate jumpinn on her ass and fucking her up... cuz she got into ur and mandas thing where she wasent wanted and then she had the balls to try and get in my busness... FUCK THAT!!! its nto her busness soo she better get her noes out of everyone shit of her noes will b up her ass, and im not even kidding.... now if ur both goiogn to give up a friend ship over her gay ass then ur both stupid, becasue there is no way its worht it at allllllllllllll... soo let it go! and get over it!

.to me.


xonixieox

:: 2004 2 May :: 9.03am
:: Mood: cranky

Been a while!
wow... havnt written in a while i guess... so... friday night me and traci went to the mall... and we met Janet and Erika there! it was so much fun! i got 2 shirts, a jackety thing and a purse! then we got like a whole bunch of makeup! lol um... yesterday was gay becasue me and meg and manda and people were supposed to go to boston but i called meg like 4 times and she didnt answer... grrrrr yesterday was so gay! well i dont really care anymore because today im going to CHRISTINA CERUTI's house! i love christina ohhhh so much!! i miss her and im so excited to see her! im going over there at noon today... and its only 9 O CLOCK!!! ahhhhh im so fucking tired! well thats all i had to say!

<3 NikkiE!!!

.to me.


krazykelc1

:: 2004 1 May :: 11.51pm
:: Mood: upset
:: Music: GUnit-Angels around me

wow...



what GREAT friends I have...

I settle my issues with someone and become friends with them and my friends all of a sudden turn on me cause of it. It's really no one's business but me and hers... and every1 can call me a hypocrit I don't care... it's not gonna stop me from being friends with her it's your own fault if you're gonna end what fucking 3 or 4 years of friendship because of something that in my opinion is WICKED GAY but w/e this whole thing upsets me because what they are calling me a hypocrit for is something they have all done atleast once since I've known them.. ahhhh w/e I'm goin to bed maybe my attitude will change tomorrow morning

.to me.


krazykelc1

:: 2004 1 May :: 10.38am
:: Mood: happy!
:: Music: dark lotus-consume your soul





Last night I went to Robbie's with Amanda & Lizzy... we haven't been there in so long cause we've all been fighting for months. But it was fun... I really missed them and hopefully we'll start talking again now without fighting about every little stupid thing... cause I really can't picture this summer without them, it would suck so bad.




Dark Lotus-Tomorrow night for all you lucky fucks who can go!

.to me.


silentcriez

:: 2004 1 May :: 10.27am

http://members.cox.net/lxix/ithurts/22.html

go there now or die

1 .from you. | .to me.


krazykelc1

:: 2004 29 April :: 6.03pm







My goals...
-be nice to everyone
-control jealousy
-continue to do well in school :-D
-quit smoking! (yea right)
-change my attitude...
-try sex on trampoline ((haha honeybunny's idea))

.to me.


silentcriez

:: 2004 28 April :: 10.33pm

The disease of alienation
the temptation of love burning to be let in
the emotion bursting within me
giving in to this pure life of sin

your vacant stare encaptures me
missusing the soul that you see
I cannot see cannot feel cannot love
how can this person be me?

Im broken but only on the outside
there are cracks embroidered in my soul
weaving sadness in and out of me
my bodies far out of control

a dizzy spell brings stars to my eyes
like teh stars i once watched with you
they twirled and they danced as we watched them
so similar except this time im blue

let me escape from this death bed
this disease filled chateau
i am not unhealthy, stand strong wanted and true
but as long as i'm crippled in this ward, im each day waiting to let go

infections rip at my stomach
im praying just to get by
you asked if i loved you and i said no,
i asure you my words were all lies

i'm blinded by poison and novacain
cannot feel cannot see a thing
the life seeps out from my pale pours
dillusions begin setting in

im strapped to this hard overused hopital bed
alone and confined from the world
they think that im dying they say i wont live another day
that my eyes will blurr out in swirls

dependent on oxygen fake from tubes
shooting drugs into my skin
i rot as i lie here dying
my soul trapped eternally within...

1 .from you. | .to me.

Woohu.com | Random Journal