He seemed no different from the rest Just a healthy normal boy His mama always did her best And he was daddy's pride and joy He learned to walk and talk on time But never cared much to be held and steadily he would decline Into his solitary shell As a boy he was considered somewhat odd Kept to himself most of the time He would daydream in and out of his own world but in every other way he was fine He's a Monday morning lunatic Disturbed from time to time Lost within himself In his solitary shell A temporary catatonic Madman on occasion When will he break out Of his solitary shell He struggled to get through his day He was helplessly behind He poured himself onto the page Writing for hours at a time As a man he was a danger to himself Fearful and sad most of the time He was drifting in and out of sanity But in every other way he was fine He's a Monday morning lunatic Disturbed from time to time Lost within himself In his solitary shell A momentary maniac With casual delusions When will he be let out Of his solitary shell

 

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A temporary catatonic Madman

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toki

:: 2005 25 September :: 9.11pm

I can't get back to studying. I tried.

I didn't mean to. God, fuck. I can't do this. I swear, I can't. I can't keep going like this. I'm not complaining for sympathy or understanding, that's not helping any.

Instead of sympathy, take a metal pole and whack me across the head. Please. I'm begging you.

I just can't do this anymore. Any of it. I'm trying, though. I promise. I can't keep on. I just can't. And I hate myself for it.

I'm being selfish. I know. I'm selfish and clingy and stupid and I don't want to deal with myself. I've spent the past weekend just crying. And I feel like a complete shit for it.

Please? I can't do it. I can't.

2 people are in a Solitary Shell | Are you in a Solitary Shell?


mudpiegrl

:: 2005 25 October :: 4.33pm

i'm beginning my x-mas list...despite how early it is.

$231 to refill my bank account...woo...

The Soundtrack

Cirque du Soleil Tickets

Body Worlds; Toronto or Philidelphia

2 people are in a Solitary Shell | Are you in a Solitary Shell?


mudpiegrl

:: 2005 25 October :: 12.17pm

in seven and nip/tuck, they use bach's air from orchestral suite number 3 for scenes...in seven, when he's in the library, searching about the juwes, which is a code for the the seven deadly sins...its a movie in which people are killed and tortured quite viciously...and in nip/tuck, when they do a face lift on one of the surgeons mother in law.

Bach's tocatta and fugue in D is used in Dark Castle, a 1986-7 mac computer game that involves navigating your way through the mazes of the castle, within which there are bats, rats and soldiers whipping those who have done badly.

Are you in a Solitary Shell?


mudpiegrl

:: 2005 25 October :: 10.57am
:: Mood: confused

what's wrong with me. i should be more feeling than this...are people not sad when things dont go their way? when they cant have waht they want?

1 people are in a Solitary Shell | Are you in a Solitary Shell?


mudpiegrl

:: 2005 25 October :: 12.20am
:: Mood: morose

The tears I might have shed for your dark fate
Turn cold and turn to tears of hate.

Are you in a Solitary Shell?


toki

:: 2005 24 September :: 12.55am

I broke too. I'm very much broken. I very much need a band aid. A very big one.

1 people are in a Solitary Shell | Are you in a Solitary Shell?


toki

:: 2005 23 September :: 1.34am

Chances are if you know me and actually care about me, I really don't deserve it.

I'm just not a good person. And that's the truth.

1 people are in a Solitary Shell | Are you in a Solitary Shell?


mudpiegrl

:: 2005 22 October :: 9.22am

today, i really wanted to go to school. i left the house on time, but worried that i wasnt. i got down the street and realised i had absolutly no money. so i went back and grabbed a bag of quarters with about four dollars in it. i figured that'd be fine and i'd get money from the atm at the station for a ticket home (i only have one ride left on my ticket). But i got there and realised that i had no wallet, and in fact, i still have no idea where it went. i could have driven, but one dollar for a toll and six for parking...six that i didnt have.

so i came home, just like last thursday. but i made hte train on time. it's really frustrating because its mostly an online course, but my dad got mad at me last time something like this happened.

tomorrow i have to get my japanese textbook, because barnes and noble didnt order the right thing. i failed my quiz though, which is really pathetic. i just cannot memorize the symbols in hiragana. Considering im doing so badly at that, im not looking forward to having to learn katakana too. its hard because there is no latin logic behind it, which is why other languages are easier for me.

so thats my day so far and its not even ten o clock yet.

Are you in a Solitary Shell?


toki

:: 2005 21 September :: 10.54pm
:: Mood: scared

I feel better now. I have apple, hot apple cider, and Barnelli's bread in my stomach.

Good times, guys.

I'm still scared. I don't know what's wrong with me.

I don't want to be, but I am. But I'll be okay. I always am. It's the way I roll.

Are you in a Solitary Shell?


sweetyas

:: 2005 21 September :: 11.15am

Calculus sucks, its tough shit
Chem 2 much to memorize (need to memorize like 92 elements and other random crap). Btw i've had 3 chem labs broke shit in 2 of them
Speech: is a bitch
Anatomy:everything i did in AP bio last year i've just done and wait there is more biology
Psych: you all lied, filthy liers psych is just a bastard. (ok college psych and Mr. mann psych i guess have to be different)

So basically this week i have a test, quiz, or speech in all of these classes. Damn it why aren't i business major they don't do anything, im serious! (yea i have a test at 1230 so just freaking out a tad)

Are you in a Solitary Shell?

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