He seemed no different from the rest Just a healthy normal boy His mama always did her best And he was daddy's pride and joy He learned to walk and talk on time But never cared much to be held and steadily he would decline Into his solitary shell As a boy he was considered somewhat odd Kept to himself most of the time He would daydream in and out of his own world but in every other way he was fine He's a Monday morning lunatic Disturbed from time to time Lost within himself In his solitary shell A temporary catatonic Madman on occasion When will he break out Of his solitary shell He struggled to get through his day He was helplessly behind He poured himself onto the page Writing for hours at a time As a man he was a danger to himself Fearful and sad most of the time He was drifting in and out of sanity But in every other way he was fine He's a Monday morning lunatic Disturbed from time to time Lost within himself In his solitary shell A momentary maniac With casual delusions When will he be let out Of his solitary shell

 

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A temporary catatonic Madman

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toki

:: 2004 1 June :: 12.22am
:: Mood: tired
:: Music: Friends..my sister's watching it

I hate chemistry. I'm tired. I didn't get enough of my notes typed up. I can't concentrate. I need to sleep, but I haven't finished it. I think I should just die and get it over with. Who's with me?

Umm..I just want to write, but I can't. I'm really hungry. No one's online tonight to talk to. Well, there's people. But not the people I can talk to talk to. If that makes sense.

I wish I was in a movie, even better...a TV show...things would be all weird for 20 minutes...with a few laughs thrown in..then it would all be solved. Everyone happy. Woo hoo.

(Big long speel I decided to delete goes here..if you're really interested, which I doubt, ask. If I want you to know, I'll tell you. Otherwise, I'll probably lie.)

My mouth is dry. I need water. Good night.
-Patrice

Are you in a Solitary Shell?


sandatthebeach

:: 2004 31 May :: 7.22pm
:: Mood: crushed

daddy played piano (well not my father)
i don't like this. well the song's good....but taht's not what i was talking about. i'm so.....well...i guess like waht my mood says...crushed. i don't think anyone really understands what i'm talking about....except maybe a couple people....but otherwise....i feel very dissatisfied with everything. i don't like being in the background but i am most of the time. at kei's party on saturday...i felt so out of place. it was cool tlaking to patrice...i really liked that...and i know she understands what i'm talking about when i say that i felt out of place. the same people who were there.....were just...there. it's hard to explain...but i don't know if i was ever friends with them. more like...they were people i used to hang out with. if i were to be asked to count the number of friends i have....i probably would only need one hand to count. i don't feel like i'm wanted in this place....i just kinda want to leave. and i'm not gonna tell myself to shut up...because that's how i really feel. i wanna get out of this place. leave. meet new people...."find" myself. i know it sounds incredibly stupid....but that's exactly how i feel...

i feel so let down. every where i turn...i come across disappointment. i'm sick of the daily gossip. i hate it. i don't want to have friends just to gossip...it gets old so quickly and so meaningless. yeah i find flaws in others and i critique them.....but who doesn't do just that? i'm my own worst critic and it's not cool. and i can't help but second guess everything people say to me. because what i hear is probably not what they're actually thinking of me. i just want someone to tell me "sandy, i don't like you when you do this...." "i hate you for this...." "i wish you would stop doing/saying this....." i want to hear these words...so badly....i want to hear them

1 people are in a Solitary Shell | Are you in a Solitary Shell?


mudpiegrl

:: 2004 31 May :: 3.33pm

A(n) ____ come(s) up to you, what you do is..
book:read it
Snake:pet it
Aunt:do i like her?
4 year-old boy:ask if he has a mummy
92 year-young man:ask if he has a mummy
32 pigs:run with the piggies
Bush:a bush? or the president...one id run in and the other from
mate:friend? say hello.
ex girl/boyfriend:say hello.
friend you have a crush on:turn red im sure
talking mongoose:lol yay! id try to talk it too
inanimate object:depends what it is...
random survey:do the survey

What you do.. brought to you by BZOINK!








justin timberlake or orlando bloom?
justin timberlake or brad pitt?:brad pitt
brad pitt or tom cruise?:brad pitt
tom cruise or george clooney:george clooney
orlando bloom or heath ledger?:heath ledger
orlando bloom or viggo mortensen?:viggo!
ejiah wood or jake glyenhall?:i guess elijah...whos jake?
justin timberlake or colin farell?:colin farell
paul walker or vin diesel?:paul walker
paul walker or tyrese?:paul walker

Him or Him? (grlsz only) brought to you by BZOINK!







What color do you think of when thinking of love?:red or pink (p[ink is puppy love)
What color is your favorite?:orange (sometiems green)
What color best discribes you?:um...a quiz said gold...orange or green?
What color best discribes your best friend?:a dark green
What color best discribes your life at the moment?:brown, mucky like
What color best discribes your life in the past?:orange or yellow or any bright colour
What color is your mood at the moment?:grayish
What color ice-cream do you like?:brown! chocolate
What hair color do you have?:strawberry blonde (real though)
What hair color do you wish you had?:i like my colour
What color eyes do you have?:greenish brown
What color eyes do you wish you had?:i like my eyes
What color dog(if any) do you have?:had: many colours...gray and black and tan and white..like sydney was
What color cat(if any) do you have?:allergic
What color is your bedroom?:lol many colours...green, blue, tan, magenta, red, blue-gray,super colour wall...

colors brought to you by BZOINK!

Are you in a Solitary Shell?


mudpiegrl

:: 2004 31 May :: 3.26pm

The Generic Teenager Stereotype
Do you drink [alcohol]?:no
Do you party a lot? How often?:eh...not much
Do you use drugs for recreational purposes?:no
How often do you use the word like in an average hour?:erm...only exemplifying my odd things
Do you skip classes? How often?:nope...well once...but it was gym...
Do you have casual sex? Protected?:nope
Do you steal?:no
Do you wear inappropriate clothing?:no
Do you drool over celebrities?:only brandon...
Do you watch a lot of TV?:no...only "what not to wear"
Do you ever watch the News?:every so often
Do you even care about world issues?:eh...somewhat
Do you read books often?:yea...super much in the summer
Are you failing a lot of your classes?:yes, actually...
Do you spend most of your time with your friends?:no...at home...
Do you smoke cigarettes?:no...eww
Do you hang out a lot in malls, or at Seven Elevens?:naw...boring
Do you often find yourself with a crush on someone?:nope
Do you cuss a lot?:fair amounts
Are you desperate to fit in?:not relally.
Are you intelligent?:i like to think i have some intellegence
The Goth Stereotype
Black lipstick?:no lipstick at all
Black eyeliner?:no makeup!
Black eyeshadow?:fuck you.
Black trenchcoat?:thats Q
Black boots?:ooh i want some...
Black fishnets?:nah...elisa has some
Black nail polish?:i have some...i chew it off tho...
Cigarettes?:eww
Heavy metal music?:i used to, not so much now
Marilyn Manson?:sometimes
Kittie?:at one time...
Cradle of Filth?:not really
Constant frown and perpetual angst?:lol the opposite
Do you like to be seen as:i dont know...
Are you an intellectual?:um.
An atheist?:not sure
Horrible home life?:of course...who doesnt?...oh! neil.
Hopelessly depressed?:no
Suffering with suicidal idealations?:no
Self-mutilation?:no
The Punk Stereotype
Plaid?:no
Big black boots?:i told you i want some
Mohawk?:no
Excessive piercings? [Especially facial]:no
Loud, confident and opinionated?:well yea...
Wild hair colors?:no
NOFX?:no
Rancid?:horrible
Well versed on political scandals and outrages?:no
A:Z
The Jock Sterotype
What's your IQ?:ACT:23...otherwise, average
Do you watch a lot of sports?:no
Play a lot of sports?:no
Talk a lot about sports?:no
Do you do anything, really, but think about sports?:no
Are you arrogant?:everyone is sometiems
Are you a male or female whore?:no
Are you homophobic?:no
Do you tease other people a lot because you want to seem confident?:no
But really you're a quivering mass of insecurity?:i dont know...dont think so
Boobs = yes?:i have some?
Parties = yes?:not drinking ones...
Dropping out of high school and flipping burgers = yes?:no
The Girl Stereotype
Do you spend a lot of time on your appearence?:less than most
Have you ever been on a diet?:lol junk food diets...
How much did you lose?:lol...somehow i lost ten pounds on pizza and cookies
Was it not so much a diet as it was an eating disorder?:no
Make yourself throw up?:no
Make-up?:no (yay patrice)
Low-cut tops?:no
How big are your boobies? [Cup size]:B-C
Do you flip your hair when you talk, even if you don't realize it?:no
Giggle a lot?:yea
What's the deal with boys?:they're cool to hang out with..but the world should be rid of them as an opposite sex
Thongs?:no
Pretty bras?:annoying as fuck...
YM, Teen, Cosmo, et al?:lol they're hilarious...
Who's the weaker sex?:girls strength wise, but enduring pain is guys
Are you a feminist?:not really
Do you think Brad Pitt is hot?:no
How often do you shave your legs?:wehn i feel like it or going out
How about your armpits?:when it gets too long
Are you emotional?:very
Especially when on your period?:oh wow yea
This Or That [Oh, that old coconut.]
Originality or Acceptance?:originality
Independence or Companionship?:independence
Stability or Freedom?:freedom
Personal or Interpersonal?:personal
Introvert or Extrovert?:extrovert
Popularity or Isolation?:i dont know...depends
Unique or Loved?:i think you can have both
Understood or Individual?:individual
You or Them?:you (me?) lol...i dont think i understand

How Stereotypical You Are... brought to you by BZOINK!

Are you in a Solitary Shell?


mudpiegrl

:: 2004 31 May :: 2.45pm

awww




Are you in a Solitary Shell?


mudpiegrl

:: 2004 31 May :: 1.26pm
:: Mood: aggravated
:: Music: green day (radio)

i just finished reading winnie the pooh....the real first story...

so saturday i had my interview

and sunday was the party at bertils

and then i invited people over

which was the whole problem in the first place

my mum and i went to get food

and we didnt ask my dad

and it pissed him off...

and understandably he needs to sleep

and they eat the food

but one must understand

i hardly see my friends

if at all

this is the first time in like five months that theyve come to visit me

so i get yelled at if they come over

and also if i go out

because i dont spend time with anyone

so i guess everyone my family wishes me to be a hermit, like every one of them.

i dont know...maybe everyone

because when some people whine about how they're never called, they dont exactly go through the motions to invite me...yet they can get mad...

that bothers me infinitely

but i suppose that doesnt matter...

ill be a hermit...again.

whatever.

2 people are in a Solitary Shell | Are you in a Solitary Shell?


sweetyas

:: 2004 31 May :: 12.27pm

News
So this morning i was eating breakfast and arab news was on i was watching it right 2 things that i saw that i cant believe are going on in the world right now:

1. A little boy six or seven years old is sitting there crying. So he starts to talk (this is an interview) and says i woke up this morning hearing odd noises and then i walked out of the house to see my grandma dead on the ground right infront of me. THen i felt alot of pain and looked down at my leg and saw a hole there. (this is the part of the interview i heard and the sad part is that this is normal,if you work in hospitla in iraq ur used to seeing little kids with "holes" in their legs, i will let you guess who put hte hole in his leg, it wasnt an iraqi)

2. As you guys already know there is a little dispute in palastine. So today the kids were protesting. Like people our ages and younger. Actually probably no one over 14. THey wanted to have normal lives, to be able to go to school without being searched. When over a 100 kids plan and carry out a protest then i think its a big deal, especially if the majority is smart enough to think for themselves. But omg, kids you guys have had enough think about their parents. How can a parent watch their kids go through enough shit to actually plan a protest?

Are you in a Solitary Shell?


toki

:: 2004 29 May :: 12.28am
:: Mood: embarrassed

Want some body heat?
So today.. took finals. Three crappiest classes done. Thank God. Still got chemistry though. And theatre tech. Which is going to take up a significant part of this weekend. Yay.

So yeah, I went to Hobby Lobby with the double J's..not the jorie though..the other two..and yeah, partied at Jill's house. ACTs came out today. I'm happy with how I did.

Then movie. Lol, it was funny. Jill and I were flipping out, man. You gotta love disaster movies. Except the jerk, nerd, and (not to be racist..but..) black guy all came out unscathed. And the couple made out BEFORE the end of the movie and they both survived. It rose about stereotypes...well...kinda...

Then Wendy's...then home. Wendy's was funish, we played picture war. Some people don't like that game, I'm sorry. But it's all in fun. No seriousness involved. It was funny though.

I'm really worried. I know I shouldn't be, but I haven't heard anything for a while. I don't know. I hope it's all okay.

I'm gonna stop talking now because if I start where I want to go, I will be yelled at.

I hope you all have had a good day...that's all that counts.
-Patrice

2 people are in a Solitary Shell | Are you in a Solitary Shell?


sandatthebeach

:: 2004 28 May :: 4.15pm
:: Mood: impatient

easy finals day for me!!!
Here's my list of finals:
Friday (today):
-Dance 1
-Intro to Theatre
-Band
Tuesday:
-Spanish 3 honors
-NOTHING!!!!
-Chemistry
Wednesday:
-Trig Honors
-American Lit Honors

So looking at that schedule of mine...today was an extremely hard...hardest finals day ever ::rolls eyes:: it was so insanely easy and I loved it!!! Every finals day should consist of extremely easy classes...i love it.

We're going on our win-a-date tonight. I'm waiting for Goli to pick me up...she's not here yet and I'm a little worried. But then again there's still 14 mins left. I'm being too antsy. I wish I had a car. But I don't wanna show up at Hawthorn Lanes by myself...it'll be too awkward. So we're supposed to go bowling then go out for dinner. Um....yeah. I don't really know details....except we're going to Hawthorn Lanes. What's for food? I guess I'll find out later tonight.

Always, Sandy

2 people are in a Solitary Shell | Are you in a Solitary Shell?


toki

:: 2004 27 May :: 9.44pm
:: Mood: Smartish Kinda
:: Music: Audioslave

Algebra..ahhh!
So finals start tomorrow. Must study math. Must get an 88. I'm going through this entire packet until I get everyone right and I understand why it's right. I refuse to go to bed until then. Then I'll study for history. Actually, I think I'll do that after my lit final. I'll have time. I already finished it. Ok. time to cram. Night.

Are you in a Solitary Shell?

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