:: 2004 16 August :: 12.56 am
:: Mood: disappointed
:: Music: MEST - Cheslsea

Leave Your Soul

:: 2004 7 August :: 1.59 am
:: Mood: annoyed

What the Shit ....
shit like this pisses me the fuck right off ...

(http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&cid=514&e=8&u=/ap/20040806/ap_on_re_as/japan_bobby_fischer)



so you don't want to be american anymore eh ? well fuck you, run to japan and get killed you fucking shit head. Who doesn't want to be american? I mean, wtf, we have frickin 1000's of spanish bitches tryin to get into our country TO BE free, and you want to run off to another country to not be free just because you think our laws are gay. Well, too tell you the truth, yes our laws are gay, but they keep things civil. Lets fucking go to japan though where there already overpopluated and try to cope with there laws.... lets see, in japan you can get your hands cut off for stealing. Sounds like a plan to me, lets all move! what a fucking moron .. to quote this little bitch

"I no longer wish to be an American citizen. Enough is enough," he said in a handwritten statement issued through his lawyer.

enough is enough and its time for a change !

Fuck You Bobby Fischer

12 Souls Left | Leave Your Soul

:: 2004 28 July :: 1.02 am
:: Mood: angry
:: Music: Finger 11 - Good Times

4 Souls Left | Leave Your Soul

:: 2004 22 July :: 1.17 am
:: Mood: confused
:: Music: finger 11 - stay in shadow

Leave Your Soul

:: 2004 26 June :: 12.00 am
:: Mood: aggravated
:: Music: Velvet Revolver

49 Souls Left | Leave Your Soul

:: 2004 24 June :: 1.03 am
:: Mood: depressed
:: Music: velvet revolver

Leave Your Soul

:: 2004 19 June :: 2.08 am
:: Mood: confused
:: Music: STP - Big Empty

2 Souls Left | Leave Your Soul

:: 2004 1 June :: 11.50 pm
:: Mood: Pissed The Fuck Off
:: Music: HIM - Razorblade Kiss

6 Souls Left | Leave Your Soul

:: 2004 30 May :: 12.12 am
:: Mood: amused

Gooks
lol I was readin some news article and I found this one very funny. I guess the gooks are bannin a game because it wasn't correct ... go figure .. gooks who want to be correct .. read it yourself



China has banned a Swedish-made computer game accused of "distorting history and damaging China's sovereignty," by showing Manchuria, Tibet and Xinjiang as independent nations, state press said.

The computer game, "Hearts of Iron", made by the Stockholm-based games developer Paradox Entertainment, also showed Taiwan as a part of Japan, Xinhua news agency said, citing a censorship committee under the Ministry of Culture.


"All these severely distort historical facts and violate China's gaming and Internet service regulations," the ministry said. "The game should be immediately prohibited."


All websites are banned from releasing the game and copies of the game on CD-ROM will be confiscated. Sellers will be punished, it said.


Internet bars that provide downloads of the game or fail to stop surfers who download, install or play the game, will be fined or even ordered to stop business, it said.


Earlier this year gaming regulators ordered all copies of a Norwegian-made computer game to be pulled off store shelves after alleging it "smeared" China's national image.


"Project IGI2: Covert Strike" was accused of blackening Beijing and the Chinese army's image by featuring a freelance mercenary stealing intelligence and conducting sabotage in China.


The mercenary fights in the game are across three linked campaigns in the former Soviet Union, Libya and China.


With the popularity of the Internet, computer games have become a booming industry in China.


In 2002, computer games pulled in earnings of 910 million yuan (110 million dollars), according to a report by state-run television station CCTV's website.


Analysts predict growth in the industry will be enormous with rising demand and the improvement of the broadband network and domestic game developers.


China's previous attempts to control burgeoning Internet use has been targeted at politically sensitive messages or essays in online discussions forums, websites and emails.


source -

2 Souls Left | Leave Your Soul

:: 2004 27 May :: 9.26 pm
:: Mood: amused
:: Music: Staind - Zoe Jane

1 Souls Left | Leave Your Soul

:: 2004 25 May :: 1.58 am
:: Mood: awake

Lame..
so I'm sittin here doing jack shit with a massive skoal spearmen snuffer in and I started to think about shit. Knowing me and When I think bout shit, it all goes wrong and I wanna toss things across the room. I figured I sent Andy 2 bucks to keep my journal alive so I might as well write in it more.

Lets Disscuse my past week shall we.

Hmmm, Monday was a bitchy day, it rained a little but it didn't matter because I was workin 11am - 7pm, doing the normal thing, stockin shit. Went golfin with chuck daddy after I got off and didn't do too bad

Tuesday I was off and slept till about 3 in the afternoon which isn't a feat anymore these days as I could prolly sleep my life away. Jeff came up and played some Mario kart and chewed snuff. Nothing really exciting.

Wednesday on the other hand was quite a trip. Worked 11am - 3pm, which is a gay shift, then went to the YMCA to ball it up. Well it seems my ballin skillz got me into trouble wit some punk ass kid who hit me in the face, I was gonna let it go until I saw blood on my fav shirt so I broke his nose and fled the scene :)

Thursday I was off again so I didn't do jack shit, Went golfin and did bad, got pissed and ate some food

Friday I quit my job because they wouldn't give me it off to see my best friend go to his 1st prom. I know your thinking its a silly event to quit your job over, but the pay and hours sucked and I promised him I would be there for him. He looked all grown up in his suit and tie, which is better then his normal look in boxers, with his date lookin sexy. I was so proud of him. After we took lots of pictures we went to grand march where I shouted his name when he walked out and he giggled like a giddy school boy who just saw his 1st titty. After grand march me and his family headed over to eat n park where they treated me to dinner.

Saturday was boring, went golfin and did semi great. Cappa, Mike, Chuck and me ventured over to pittsburgh to see the buccos win then to cappas appartment to chill a bit then home. Cappa stayed for a few and we played a mean game of shasta ball until Cherrylane Yelled at us..

Sunday, I didn't do shit, Bobby of all people called me at 12 30 at night and wanted to do something ... now you have to understand by something I mean go out and blow shit up. So we went out and got some big ass rocks and placed them in the middle of the road and waited for about 45 mins before our 1st victum came. of all the types of cars in the world this one had to be a freakin herse ... Bam ... front headout gone and one pissed off driver ... this got boring so we relocated to 819. We stole a sign from the local Curves Fitness center and placed it in the middle of the road sideways so you couldn't see it till you were right on it. Our 1st victum was a red sunfire going way over the speed limit and bam .. didn't even stop ... Im sure it did some damage but we didn't see it happen just heard it. He did however come back to see what he hit. So we placed it in the road again and the next 4 cars avoided it .. being pissed we tryed one more time and the 5th car missed it but barely .. He stoped and got out and tossed the sign over the gaurdrail. Sooner or Later we knew the Poe were gonna show up but to our surprize 4 state poe showed up and we got the hell outta there.

Thats all for now me thinks .. thats long enough ...

4 Souls Left | Leave Your Soul

:: 2004 19 April :: 2.35 am
:: Mood: angry

Loving You ....
I love you, I love you and not in a friendly way, although I think we're great friends. And not in a misplaced attraction puppy dog way although I'm sure that's what you call it. I love you, very simply, very truly. You're the epitome of everything I've ever looked for in another human being and I know you think of me as just a friend and crossing that line is the furthest thing from an option you'd ever consider. But I had to say it, I just can't take this anymore, I can't stand next to you without wanting to hold you, I can't look into your eyes without feeling that longing you only read about in trashy romance novels, I can't talk to you without wanting to express my love for everything you are. And I know this will probably like queer our friendship, but I had to say it cause I've never felt this way before and I don't care, I like who I am because of it. And if bringing this out tonight means that we can't hang out anymore then that hurts me but God, I couldn't allow another day without getting it out there regardless of the outcome, which by the look on your face, is to be the inevitable shoot down and you know I'll accept that but I know, I know that some part of you is hesitating for a moment and if there is a moment of hesitation then that means you feel something too and all I ask is that you please not dismiss that and try to dwell on it for just 10 seconds. There isn't another soul on this whole planet who has made me half of the person I am when I'm with you. And I'd risk this friendship for a chance to take it to the next plateau because it's there between you and me you can't deny that. Even if we never talk again after tonight please know that I am forever changed because of who you are and what you've meant to me. ........... ... .. ...

4 Souls Left | Leave Your Soul

:: 2004 28 March :: 12.25 pm
:: Mood: angry

Die .....
I hate u so fucking much that I wanna nail u to a cross and stick 1000 needles in ur skin, I want to take a sledgehammer and break ur toes, I wanna tear ur fingernails off and pour salt onto them , but u haven't felt anything yet sweetheart, I want to slit ur skin in 8 places and watch u bleed until u are ready to faint and die but no, I'll give u a fucking blood transfusion just so I can keep ur sorry waste of a life alive a lil bit longer, I wanna tear every single piece of hair off ur body 1 by 1 and watch you cry out, I wanna cut ur breasts off and toss them in ur face, I wanna rip one of ur eyes so u can feel half the pain that u have caused me, Then Im going to break each finger 1 by 1 and make a slit in between each 1 and finally when the devil arives on his unholy steed and is ready to claim ur soul, I'm going to spray him with holy water just so I can keep u longer......I Hate u.......

4 Souls Left | Leave Your Soul

:: 2004 28 January :: 1.25 am
:: Mood: annoyed

Loving Memory
Touching you is like brimstone
I’m yearning for your heart
Frequently I’m a lost soul
Loneliness is my single treat
All I need is you close by
To help me take a stand
Alone I can only make a sound
Together we can command

Two souls fused make a fearsome blade
To maim which we call foe
Decides who lives and dies as one
All creation shall know

To be as one but never alone
To choose our fate and not be led
Each a hand to grasp the world
And drink from what we’re bled
To look at the dark skies above
And witness what we have made
Who to say these are ill doings
The world now encased in shade

All these things are possible
Victory with each thing faced
But you are the missing puzzle piece
Solitude we shall never taste
The time of a Dark Age is here
A horrified future in view
Become my Queen of Rotting Hearts
My putrid love rests in you

Leave Your Soul

:: 2004 27 January :: 9.02 pm
:: Mood: aggravated

Wanting
Time is like the Devils breath,
Seeping through serrated teeth.
I feel like I am out of place,
Like a shallow grave with no stone,
No recognition, No one who cares.
Being around you is like the perfect night,
Warm like fresh blood, calm like lifeless eyes,
So many stars I would need your help to count,
One perfect, full, bright, radiant, moon,
The moon resembles you though,
So alone, out of place among the stars,
But yet so stunning beautiful.
I would love to grasp the moon,
Hold it tight against me, and comfort it.
To let it know that I’m looking when no one else is,
That I admire the comfort in the darkness.
Alas the moon has distance between it and I,
Like earth between two soul mates coffins.
So close yet the connection is incomplete.

I am not fading away as the sun begins to rise,
I wish for eternal darkness.
To gaze at the beauty, the lovely white moon,
And hope I may see her again very soon.

Leave Your Soul

:: 2003 19 December :: 4.46 pm

You met her a few months ago, and somehow she managed to seep into your subconscious like that "Suga how you get so fly" song. Just like you have no clue who the hell sings it, you don't know why she's there. But she is, whether you like it or not. You know her cell phone, her room phone. You can dial her Aunt Doreen's house in West Springfield (where she goes to do her laundry every two weeks) faster than you can peck-out 911. But she doesn't know.

Her screenname, that generic one with her first name followed by three to five random numbers or UMass, has its own category at the top of your buddy list. Not only do you know what a "Buddy Alert" is, you've rigged your computer to play "Fat Guy in a Little Coat" from "Tommy Boy" every time her screen name changes from gray to black. Then her away message comes down, and you have a decision to make. To IM or not to IM? These are the ridiculous games that you play on a daily basis. But she doesn't know.

She's it. All right, so maybe not "it" it. Not necessarily Ms. Right, but closer to Ms. Right-up-there-with-Anna-Kournikova-and-Lizzie-McGuire-on-your-list-of-people-you'd-give-anything-to-be-stranded-with-on-a-broken-down-elevator. But it's about more than that. When is it ever about more than that? Never. Not like frilly white dress, overpriced catering, embarrassing drunk in-laws more, but closer to UMass sweatpants, two D.P. Dough Roni Zonies, a futon and a movie you have no interest in seeing more. But she doesn't know.

She's gorgeous, but gorgeous is an understatement. More like you're startled every time you see her because you notice something new in a "Where's Waldo" sort of way. More like you can't stop writing third grade run-on sentences because you can't remotely begin to describe something ... someone ... so inherently amazing. But you're a writer. You can describe anything. That's what you do: pictures to words, events to words, words to even better words. But nothing seems right. More like you're afraid that if you stare at her for too long, you'll prove your parents right: that yes, your face will stick that way. But you wouldn't mind.

You wouldn't mind that the questioning, "Hello?" on the other end makes you want to smile and throw up at the same time. You wouldn't mind worrying about what to get her for her birthday and spending $300 when you only have $17.50 and a Triple-A card to your name. You wouldn't mind that she left your TV on and the blaring infomercials wake you up at 4 a.m. ... because it gives you a chance to watch her sleep. You don't mind that you've slipped up twice when you were hammered and hinted at how you feel, but she was too drunk to remember. So she doesn't know.

Sure, she's pretty, but it's about more than that. You two connect. Anything you throw at her, she can throw right back. You figured out what's going on in that predictable head of hers in under five minutes, but something tells you her heart would take about five years.

You remember everything she's ever said to you, and when that freaks her out you blame it on your photographic memory (which is a lie, you have a 2.7 GPA). You can't remember your teaching assistant's name, and you can't remember that your Puffton rent check was due four days ago, yet you remember the middle name of the kid who tripped her in fifth grade and gave her that cute little scar on her shoulder. Maybe it's because you actually listen when she talks. When do you actually listen? Never. But she doesn't know.

But she has a boyfriend. The kid is a tool, and you are not. He has no redeeming qualities, and you have about 38, even when you're hung over. You could kick his butt, and you've never been in a fight in your life. He treats her like crap, and you would treat her like the princess she believed herself to be on Halloween in 1988.

But she loves him. He wouldn't know what he had even if she slapped him across the face and dumped him, but somehow she still loves him. And somehow she still doesn't know.

Then, out of nowhere, she slaps him across the face and dumps him. She comes to you. You've been there before, so you seem like the smartest guy on earth. She cries, but your corny half-joke, half-compliment somehow gets a smile out of her that almost makes you feel ashamed that you're the only one around who gets to witness it. It looks like you might make her realize that all guys don't deserve to have rocks thrown at them.

But nothing changes. She doesn't know. You get that library elevator feeling in your stomach that she'll never know. You get that feeling that you'll be forced to write a cheesy Collegian column about her that makes "Sleepless in Seattle" look like "Girls Gone Wild."

You go to sleep. You wake up. She doesn't know. You're not in love. You're not obsessed. You blame it on the fact that you just need to get some, but still, it's about more than that. It would just be nice if once in your life, things worked out the way you wanted them to.

So......., it's about time you know.

6 Souls Left | Leave Your Soul

:: 2003 15 November :: 2.27 am
:: Mood: accomplished
:: Music: Staind - So Far Away

7 Souls Left | Leave Your Soul

:: 2003 26 October :: 8.45 pm
:: Mood: amused
:: Music: Adema

1 Souls Left | Leave Your Soul

:: 2003 20 October :: 1.12 pm
:: Mood: blank
:: Music: Sublime - Santeria

1 Souls Left | Leave Your Soul

:: 2003 15 October :: 8.02 am
:: Mood: angry
:: Music: Bright Eyes - A Perfect Sonnet

5 Souls Left | Leave Your Soul

:: 2003 12 October :: 11.28 pm
:: Mood: awake
:: Music: Archie - We Ready

2 Souls Left | Leave Your Soul

:: 2003 10 October :: 1.25 pm
:: Mood: amused
:: Music: English Class Teacher Talkin !!

3 Souls Left | Leave Your Soul

:: 2003 1 October :: 10.34 pm
:: Mood: lonely
:: Music: Bonnie Tyler !!

2 Souls Left | Leave Your Soul

:: 2003 1 October :: 2.05 pm
:: Mood: restless
:: Music: Saliva - Rest in Pieces

Leave Your Soul

:: 2003 30 August :: 5.36 pm
:: Mood: distressed
:: Music: Fabalous- So Into You

1 Souls Left | Leave Your Soul