I was having an ok day. Then mom calls. Celestica is closing, so sometime between now and October she will be losing her job. She’ll get a severance package: one weeks pay for every year worked, plus all her vacation, so once she gets canned, she should have about 5 months worth of normal pay, plus unemployment. She just flipped out though and bitched to me for an hour.

I guess it’s a big deal because she makes almost twice as much as dad does, but with that much time to find a new job, there shouldn’t be any problem. She just wanted to be her normal self: overemotional.

Went to Olive Garden with Lindsey tonight. The food was better than normal. The waitress wasn’t too intelligent though. First off, if a guy and a girl come in together, it looks like they’re on a date. Second I’m gay. Stop hitting on me, and stop ignoring the person I’m with, she wants service too. I can’t remember the last time that they did my hair like I wanted. At least she cut most of it this time, only a few spots were missed. But she blended the left and right side different, so on my left the hair is like it should be, and on my right it’s blended in a few inches higher. Uncle Bob is in the hospital for his back, hopefully that goes well.

And I'm in the mood for a cuddle.

Today… Got a haircut, she did a moderately decent job. I’ll see what it looks like after my shower in the morning. Went shopping this afternoon. Sandals are fucking expensive. Got a pair that fit, $99. Also got new insoles for my normal shoes, those were $40. Got a few shirts too, Eddie Bauer actually had some stuff that I liked, and I was able to find a size small on one of the mannequins. Made some meatloaf for dinner. I don’t understand how people can screw it up. I made up my own recipe and didn’t measure anything, it turned out very well.

I got served a subpoena today. Other than that it was pretty uneventful.

We need to find more married women for Jason to hit on.

I went to Little Theatre with Jackie on Saturday. We saw In America. Very good movie, although you have to be in the mood for it. You really don’t want to see it if you’re in the mood for action or an uplifting movie.

Just went to the grocery store. Somehow it made me happy. I’m getting too domestic.

Just got out of my physics quiz, which I think I aced. Ran some errands this morning and actually accomplished a few things that I have been putting off. Now for Calc :-(

The concert on Monday was fun; I think I enjoyed Stroke 9 more than Phantom Planet. I was expecting the opposite. Now I need to get a Stroke 9 cd.

I cannot help but be in a good mood. Thanks for a good night folks.



You should be dating a Cancer.
21 June - 22 July
This mate is protective, kind and compassionate.
Though this crab can often be possessive, moody
or crabby, he or she is strongly attached to
his/her sexual partner.


What Zodiac Sign Are You Attracted To?
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This one is actually accurate.

Watched Punch Drunk Love at Jason’s last night. I can’t help but feel that the main character is very much like me (except for the sledgehammer part). Time to get stuff done today, although I really don’t want to do anything.

What Classic Movie Are You?
personality tests by similarminds.com

What Famous Leader Are You?
personality tests by similarminds.com

So, I just filled out a really long survey. And guess what, it didn’t copy, and I closed it before I posted it. So you get this little entry instead.

Woohu used to be my outlet for my emotions. Recently I have been forced to explain my emotions to those who the journal is not even meant for. I write to calm myself or to think through things. I expect comments from my friends helping me to think through what I write. Not being insulted by bastards. So the next time one of those who like to post as anonymous decides to, think first; it is another one of those modern concepts. The world does not revolve around you.

And for my actual friends, thanks for helping me when I need it; and ignoring me when I need that.

Your wings are DRAGON wings. Massive and
covered in scales, they shimmer with strength
and magic. They are the most obvious display of
your power - though it runs equally throughout
your heart and mind. You are uncompromising and
grave, with a profound sense of justice. You
have firm ideas about what is right and what is
wrong and set out to fix what problems you can.
You realize that you are more capable of
dealing with life and evil than most, and as
such you see it as your responsibility to
protect those who cannot defend themselves. You
have existed since antiquity and as such you
are wise far beyond your years in this
lifetime. While you strive for fairness and
peace, if someone should steal from your cave
of treasure (though not all that glitters is
gold) or compromise the happiness of you or one
who is close to you - they have signed their
death warrant. You have a mighty vengeance and
will unleash it upon such people immediately
and mercilessly. Arguing with you is
useless...you rarely back down and are known
for holding firm in your beliefs. Sometimes you
feel intensely burdened with the troubles of
others...acting as a Guardian can get so
wearisome. But you never give up...you see it
as your life's mission. Often very introverted,
you can be so smart...it's scary. Such a
combination of intelligence, creativity, power,
beauty, and magic is often intimidating to
those around you - who are also unlikely to
understand you. Arrogant, proud, overserious,
and sometimes a bit greedy or obsessed with
whatever treasure you choose to pursue...you
have enchanted people for centuries, and will
continue to do so.


~Claim Your Wings~
brought to you by Quizilla

Does anyone else just constantly think about things, no matter how pointless they are? I always have to be doing something in my head. Very often, I notice I am talking to myself at work, and get quite a few weird looks from customers. I bring this up because all day today I have been thinking. My thoughts normally wander over so many things that it does not actually affect what I am doing. So today the thought has been my life. Where it’s going, where it has been, what I want it to become, whether or not it has the possibility of actually getting there, just general insecurities. Why are all these thoughts coming to me this year? Up until now, I have been secure being who I am, or realizing that I will someday be able to express that part of me.

Jason made a comment the other day, “You are a good listener AND I love you. Deal with that, ya compliment-issue-having biatch. :-)” I found it interesting how much of an effect this has on me. I cannot help but laugh reading it.

I once told someone, “I don’t think life will ever be permanently fun, you just have to be happy when it is, and learn to deal with it when it’s not.” I am finding it very hard to follow this advice myself, and I am second guessing the validity of the statement. No, life will never be permanently fun, but do we really have to live with the downs? I mean, can we just be content without having fun, or being down? I am just having trouble balancing all of the shit.

I enjoyed spring break where I could go to work and come home. No other thoughts, worries, or shit. I am ready to be at a full time job, ready to drop out and move on, ready for the next phase in my life.

I feel like a short entry tonight, so that’s what you’re going to get. I worked all weekend, accomplished nothing. Jason totaled his car tonight, and managed to fuck two others, and do light damage to a few more. Hung out with him for a while afterward, got a glass sliver in my thumb getting stuff out of his car, can’t get the fucker out. Finally found a company that would rent to people under 25. Not sure why Jason picked light blue, but it matches him well.

So the thing at DeNooyer finally posted, I guess I was just being too hopeful.

Today I had to work, and guess what, not a single person was scheduled in Cabinets & Appliances; Matt went down there to cover, so I got to run our department by myself. I about tripled my sales goal if not more, which was $4000. So I was fucking busy. Came home and decided to take a nap. I decided to start dishes, but Katie called soon after. So we go to Dairy Mart to buy beer, I get told to leave, so I accidentally stole the pack of Mamba I was hanging onto, and left the beer on the counter for her. First time I remember shoplifting. Then we’re off to Harding’s where I buy the beer and go to Kelli’s. After a while, we end up going to Alex’s. He’s an ass, but was on very good behavior tonight. I actually had a good time there. Come home, Paul calls. I end up going to Marty’s new place. This is where I begin being confused. Jordan is hitting on me like none other, weird in itself. There’s random comments between the I love you statement, such as: you’re so laid back, so un-dramatic, so easy to get along with, such a great guy and so on. The weird thing is I hear similar comments from other people. This doesn’t seem to be like me at all. It’s weird getting these compliments, because I don’t feel I deserve any of them.

And why does it bother me more to receive a compliment, than it does to hear someone tell me they love me?

Marty: Guy in his late 30’s early 40’s, somewhere in there; appears to be my father’s age. So he’s having this housewarming party. Sure older people have younger friends, but why did it seem like Paul was the oldest there? And Paul is only a few years older than I am. Almost no one seemed to be of legal age to be drinking. Just disturbed me slightly.

Night.

IDENTIFICATION:
*1. Full Birth Name: Joseph Paul Burgess
*2. Natural Hair Color: Dark brown
*3. Hair Color Currently: See above
*4. Eye color: Dark brown
*6. Height Currently: 5’7”ish
*7. Glasses/Contacts: Nope
*8. Birthdate: 9/27/1982
*9. Sign: Libra
*10. Current Age: 21
*11. Parents Names: Peter & Nancy
*12. Siblings: Rob
*13. Location: Of me? Kalamazoo
*14. Schools Attended: Elk Mound (elementary, middle, and high); currently WMU
*15. Current Grade: 3rd year
*16. Extra Curriculars: None
*17. College Major: Engineering Graphics & Design Technology, with an Automotive Emphasis
*18. Planned College Minor: None
*19. Any Piercing: Not yet
*20. Any Tattoos: Maybe later

SOCIAL LIFE:
*1. Best Girl Friend(s): Jess & Margaret
*2. Best Boy Friend(s): Jason
*3. Boyfriend/Girlfriend: Not yet
*4. If Yes, Current Dating Partner: n/a
*5. Current Crush: Maybe later.
*6. Hobbies: Food, cars, friends, pottery, plants.
*7. Where Can You Usually Be Found: In my room, or at work, sometimes class.
*8. Who Can You Usually Be Found With: Kris or Matt
*9. Cell Phone: Provider-Sprint brand-Sanyo
*10. Pager: What’s the point?
*11. Are You Center Of Attention Or Wallflower: Wallflower
*12. What Type Automobile Do You Drive: I’m driving a Jimmy, but there’s a few others at home.
*13. What Type Automobile Do You Wish You Drove: Pagani
*14. Would You Rather Be With Friends Or On A Date: Date, as long as it’s a good one.
*15. Where Is The Best Hangout: Monaco Bay was pretty good.
*16. Do You Have A Job: Yup, Menards
*17. Where Do You Attend Church: I don’t.
*18. Where's the best place to have a date: Zoo.

FRIENDS:
*1. Have You Known The Longest: At K-Zoo: Jason Back home: JJ
*2. Do You Argue The Most With: A while ago it was Mike.
*3. Do You Always Get Along With: Everyone.
*4. Is The Most Trustworthy: Jackie
*5. Makes You Laugh The Most: Kelli
*6. Has Been There Through All The Hard Times: Nobody has been there for ALL of them, but I’d say Laura was there for some of the hardest.
*8. Is The Most Sensitive: Jason
*10. Has The Coolest Siblings: JJ
*11. Is The Most Blunt: Me
*12. Is The Shyest: Amanda
*13. Is The Most Outgoing: Jackie
*13. Has The Coolest Parents: I haven’t met most of the parents.
*14. Is Most Rebellious: None of them.
*15. Is Most Conservative: Jacob (Sivertson)
*16. Is Most Likely To Become Famous: Stef
*17. Is Most Likely To Become Rich: Me.
*18. Is Most Likely To Wind Up In Jail: Jay (already happened)
*19. Is Most Likely To Have A Million Kids: Mike
*20. Is Most Likely To Never Have Kids: Lindsey
*21. Always Wears A Smile: Jackie
*22. Is Smartest: Not sure.
*23. Who Has The Biggest Attitude: Katie or Lindsey
*24. Without Thinking About It, Who Do You Think Would Die For You: I think all of them would try and save me, I don’t think anyone would knowingly die for me.
*25. Complains The Least: Dave
*26. Biggest Flirt: Stef
*27. Needs A Good Man/Woman: Jakob
*28. Never EVER Betrayed you: I can’t think of anyone who has.
*30. Easiest to talk to: Kelli

OTHER:
*1. Who Is Your Role Model: Not sure I have one.
*2. What Are Your Pet Peeves: Dirt, slow service, stupidity, carelessness, rudeness, incompetence, society in general.
*3. Have You Ever Been In Love: No.
*4. Have You Ever Loved Someone You Had Not Loved But Like A Lot: Yes.
*5. Have You Ever Cried Over The Opposite Sex: No, not necessary.
*6. Do You Have A "Type" Of Person You Always Go After: No.
*7. How Long Was Your Longest Relationship: Never had one.
*8. Have You Ever Lied To Your Best Friend(s): Every day until I graduated HS.
*9. Ever Wanted To Get Revenge On Someone Because They Hurt You: Yes.
*10. Ever Been Cheated On: Nope.
*11. Ever Said I Love You To Someone of the Opposite Sex: Not in a sexual way.
*12. Rather Be Dumper Or Dumped: Dumped.
*13. Rather Have A Relationship Or A "Hookup": Relationship.
*14: Want someone you don't have right now: Yes.
*15. Ever Liked Your Best Guy/Girl Friend: Yes.
*16. Do You Want To Get Married: Yes.
*17. Do You Want Kids: I think so.
*18. Do You Believe In Psychics: No.

THIS POINT IN LIFE:
*20. What Is Your Favorite Part Of Your Physical Being: My smile.
*21. What Is Your Favorite Part Of Your Emotional being: Being relaxed.
*22. Are You Happy With You: Almost never.
*23. Are You Happy With Your Life: Parts.
*24. Are You Scared Right Now: No.
*25. If You Could Change Something In Your Life, Right Now What Would It Be: Myself.
*27. Biggest Regret: Not being myself earlier in life.

FAVORITE:
*1. Kiss: Only had one, so I guess it’s you Lindsey.
*2. Room In House: Mine.
*3. Girl's Name: Elise
*4. Guy's Name: Tyler
*5. Person To Talk To About Your Problems: Woohu
*6. Song: Bryan Adams: Everything I Do
IN THE LAST 48 HOURS, HAVE U:
*1. Cried: No
*2. Bought Something: Yes
*3. Gotten Sick: No
*5. Eaten: Some Pizza at Monaco Bay, and a few bite size candy bars.
*6. Been Kissed: No
*7. Felt Stupid: Of course
*8. Said I Love You: No
*10. Met Someone New: Do customers count?
*11. Moved On: No
*12. Talk To An Ex: Wouldn’t I have to have one in the first place?
*13. Missed An Ex: No
*14. Talked To Someone You Have A Crush On: Yes.
*15. Had a Serious Talk: Sort of.
*16. Missed Someone: Yes.
*17. Hugged Someone: No.
*18. Fought With Your Parents: No.
*19. Fought With A Friend: No.
*20. Dreamed About Someone You Can't Be With: No.

How can a week be so shitty, and so good at the same time? I am in a good mood right now, so I’m just going to leave it at that.

I am in an interesting mood today. I was mad because I’m being kicked off my parents insurance. For some reason the company wouldn’t allow me to be on the plan because of the MI drivers license. So I stopped by a local insurance company to figure out the jargon. They wanted $1600 for six months. Looking over her shoulder, I found out I have the second highest credit rating available, so that is a good sign. Next step was Geico, they were about the same price. Last stop was Progressive; they are only $1100 for an entire year, with superior coverage.

Mailed my shoes back asking for a smaller size, they went on sale too, so I will actually be getting money back even after shipping.

Looking over my credit cards online today. That stupid flower shop did credit my account for what they messed up. Now, they credited it again, so the flowers were free. DeNooyer hasn’t posed the service yet, and I don’t see a temporary charge, so I’m hoping they screwed up and I get it free; probably no such luck. MBNA also raised my limit another $460, so that will come in handy.


You're a Perfect Kiss. You and your best friend
are a little more than friends now aren't
you...? hehe


What kind of Hot Boy Kiss are you??
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Chatted with Kelli last night. We just sat around drinking and watching Two Weeks Notice. We both talked about many of our insecurities, it made me feel a lot better, and I think she was happy too. Just an overall comforting night, I think we’re going out tonight.

Back from Monaco Bay. Called Kelli, don’t think we are going to make it to Wayside tonight. Although I had a great time with Jason and Mike. Extremely wonderful atmosphere at Monaco Bay. I thought a piano bar would be boring, but it ended up being great. Seeing a drunken college guy dance with women that reminded me of my mom was entertaining. One of the piano players was attractive, although the rest of the scenery was disappointing (except for one waitress, but she was female; maybe she has a brother?)

So I thought DeNooyer didn’t do too bad of a job. So what if there was grease on the steering wheel and center console, and so what if their carwash left brush strokes all over and didn’t get half the dirt off. Then I notice today, that while the carwash did not get all the dirt off, the spots it did wash, it washed so well that it took off paint. I’m pissed.

Yesterday was great, today, not so much. Slept like shit last night. Then had some work done on my truck, at 8 am. Three hours and $500 later I get to leave. So step two in getting things fixed is done, once I get this paid off it will be time for step three. I wonder if I’ll actually ever finish? Worked tonight, not too bad, I’m just tired of it; and the stupidity of people that I work with. Two more months and I’m due for another raise, so that’s something to look forward to.

Today has been a successful day. I have a place to live for the summer, so I can delay looking for a place to live for a while. The trip to Indy was fun. Finally found a watch that I like, that I can afford. Established a friendship. Overall I just sort of relaxed, nice change of pace.

Saw Passion tonight. Interesting movie, not sure if I actually liked it or not. I think I’ll just leave it at that. I’m not sure what I’m in the mood for, but sitting here isn’t it. One more day of work, then I get one of vacation.