Upchuck
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2005 1 August :: 9.54pm
Praise Be to God
I think I nailed my presentation tonight. The professor seemed impressed and my classmates, who are all high school teachers, did too.
Tonight I will be going to bed happy for the first time in a long time. I thought you should all know that.
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upchuck
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2005 23 July :: 11.51am
:: Music: "Back To The Way We Were" RCG
Things move on
Well I had a very hard morning this morning. i woke up and It was just in my head, the whole situation. I thank you so much Brianna for being there for me, but talking about it brought it all out to the forefront. I can't figure things out without her, but that is the problem. Yeah, it sucks, but I have made a determination.
Well, I was trying to grow the beard back. I've gotten like 8 days into it now, but it itches like crazy and I think I'm about to shave. It was a nice thought on my part though.
I've decided to be a pimp. I'm just going to forget all this stupid stuff. Ever since i can remember I've been very serious about a lot of things and that is why I can be so crazy now. Also, ever since I can remember I've been a hopeless romantic. Now some might say that that is a good quality for someone to have, but it ain't gettin' me anywhere. So, just as I am really wacky sometimes, and I really do like it when I am. Mostly because I'm so outside of myself, and I don't care what other people think, I'm going to just start going for it. If I don't set myself up with an idea in my head, I won't get my heart broke when it doesn't work out. Yeah, it really sucks that sh'e fuckin' with my head like this. I just choose not to let er have that power over me anymore. It's just that simple, I choose.
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cowsgomoo!!!
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2005 22 July :: 12.01am
Life still sucks. Things are getting a little better. Something might happen with a cutie from work. Maybe, Maybe not. I'm not too hopeful.
-me
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cowsgomoo!!!
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2005 22 July :: 12.01am
Live still sucks. Things are getting a little better. Something might happen with a cutie from work. Maybe, Maybe not. I'm not too hopeful.
-me
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upchuck
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2005 19 July :: 11.44pm
"Sweet Southern Comfort" - Buddy Jewel
Well, we've got a gig that starts at like, 4pm on Saturday. It's a private event. Really what I'd like to be able to do is get done withour gig and then go to Muskegon. A girl who sits behind me in my history class has an all girl rock band that is playing in Muskegon. There name is Elixia and I'd really like to go. Except I don't know when we'll be done. If anybody wants to go, drop me a line.
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upchuck
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2005 19 July :: 12.17pm
:: Mood: lonely
:: Music: "I Just Wanna Make Love To You" Foreigner
Thank You All
Thank you all for your wonderful support.
See the great thing is that this can be the place where I just let all my frustrations out. Of course, it seems I can only attract married girls.
As for the other things said. Desparation. Sure, maybe a little, but not so much. It seems like that from what I've said and if this is the only knowledge you have of me right now (well, I guess it is for all of you here) I'm not. I'm just going through a tough time right now and it feels like I have no one. And that if I did have just that one person, that special bond that it would make it all better. But that is a lie to myself. It won't. I need friedns to help me deal with the pain, that I can talk to and hang out with. Last night was going to be good, with Keith and Dustin, take my mind off things. But Nikki was there and she brought up the situation again, I was stuck there.
I guess it's a mending of a broken heart that I'm looking for. Once I thought I was over Shari, but then I spent a day around her and I showed up on Jessa's doorstep that night. I guess that's what I'm looking for, just veiled in this idea of man.
And all these statements are just great. Some of the things I feel deep inside, but they won't be applicable in five minutes. I'll still need that person, but it will change back.
And as for dealing with one jerk too many, you haven't dealt with this jerk yet. Get back on the horse and give the male race a chance to redeem itself. Sitting out of the game doesn't make the game change. The only way you can get what you want is to get back in there, break some old rules and right new ones (yes I used the wrong form of right, does it work).
Anything else?
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upchuck
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2005 18 July :: 5.38pm
So I've layed prostrate enough now, it has to be worth mentioning.
Either there are no single ladies looking at my journal
-or-
They simply don't want me.
Now being the pathetic pessimist that I can be sometimes, I would choose the latter option if I don't get some encouragement soon. So
ENCOURAGE ME!!!!!
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lil_bill06
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2005 15 July :: 8.56pm
This is so TRUE
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Upchuck
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2005 14 July :: 10.05pm
When I say I"m going to someplace liek the Whitecaps game Friday night, and that I would like some female company, that means if you're single and female, I would like you too accompany me. You must be post-high school though.
So I'm going to a Whitecaps game Friday night. (hint hint).
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upchuck
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2005 14 July :: 12.13am
:: Music: "Red Rag Top" Tim McGaw
It's really strange how that song really gets at the heart of what is going on in my life right now. Don't get the wrong idea, I'm not responsible for anything right now, thank God.
Anyway, I'm coaching the Northview league this year ond two of my players, who are both between their Freshman and Sophomore years showed up to the game last week talking about this thing called Xanga. Their explaining to me what it is, "like an online journal thing." Telling me, like I'm ancient and am completely naive. So I responded, "Kind of like Woohu, huh?" And their like "Yeah. But Woohu was like the first one." Now these girls are from Cedar Springs. I thought some of you old timers would appreciate something like that.
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cowsgomoo!!!
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2005 12 July :: 11.44pm
ACT: final score 28
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m&ms487
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2005 12 July :: 7.33pm
:: Mood: chipper
ACT results are in.
I'm a little disappointed.
I got a 27.
My highest score was in science, it was 29/36.
It figures, the subject I hate the most is the one I score best in.
That's how it goes I guess.
I'm working a lot now. I never knew how bad people could be until now. God, what asses. All you can do is nod and smile. I didn't even take the weird guy screaming about the dollar on his gas can personally.
Even my manager looked shook up.
It actually made me happy. Is that odd?
Probably.
-michelle
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cowsgomoo!!!
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2005 5 July :: 10.29pm
i hate my life
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upchuck
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2005 4 July :: 10.14pm
Kim and I are no longer together. IT's been a heart wrenching three weeks. I would tell it all, but it's very personal. Maybe someday the truth will come out, but it's just somehting i can't talk aobut right now.
On the bright side, I'm single again. I saw Lori in Sand Lake Friday night and gave her my number. I hope she calls me. I'm in somewhat desparate need of affection.
We had big weekend. The band made almost $1000. We took first place at Lake City Battle of the Bands against some very good competition. Smoody took second and Praise band took third. It was a good time. Sand Lake sucked so bad. The stupid idiots that were running the board didn't know how and really screwed up the sound. The band that took first, their singer was screaming into the mic and you couldn't even hear him. But we took second, which is reverse of last year. Then we played Saturday night in Luther and Sunday night before the fireworks. IT was a good time. I got to know Josh's family and Colleen (Josh's g/f) and I seem to have this natural chemistry, kind of like brother and sister.
I was disappointed though. Zack started playing "The Dance" by Garth Brooks and Ashley told all the couples to come up to dance. Well I wanted to know if there were any single ladies out there who wanted to dance. Nobody came up. I would have unplugged my bass and gone out and danced if it was a pretty girl.
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lil_bill06
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2005 2 July :: 10.46pm
:: Mood: annoyed
I wish that I could tell people how I really feel. How I really want to feel. I wish that I could trust people more than what I do. But everything that has been happening lately just makes it hard to do.
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