"If you live to be one hundred, I want to live to be one hundred minus one day, so I never have to live without you" ~Winnie The Pooh "Life isn't fair. It's just fairer then death. That's all." ~William Goldman Always look on the bright side of death! Just before you draw your terminal breath Life's a piece of shit, When you look at it. Life's a laugh and death's a joke, it's true, You'll see it's all a show, Keep 'em laughing as you go Just remember that the last laugh is on you! -Spamalot

 

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My Own Little World

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goose

:: 2004 12 August :: 1.01am

9 days
Im sad. So today a bunny ran across me while driving. I stopped of course but spencer said the bunny was really cute. then he said i was his little bunny. and it was so cute and then i cried and he's being so cute and so sweet and telling me he loves me and he's leaving in 9 days, so i cried.

to help myself i went to get doughnuts and went to barnes and noble and saw a really cool assingment notebook i think im going to get. it was cute. then went to quarter bowling which we didnt actually do and then went to ashleys and just sat around WITH EARL! that was cool i was never really close with earl or anything it was just cool to see he's still alive, and that he's still the same and a really nice guy to me at least. so yeah i dunno just laughed, talked about one acts and got my mind off of college which was good...cept kyle is leaving saturday so thats sad and i was reminded of college again but not for long. Yeah im gonna scrapbook ive been gone a while and i need to scrapbook :) byeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

Are you a purple cow?


sandatthebeach

:: 2004 10 August :: 1.26am
:: Mood: like a dumbass

I haven't felt this stupid in awhile....I almost made it through the entire summer without feeling quite so stupid......finding out a piece of information can really make you crumble, yeah? Yes.

I'm gonna go crawl in my hole now.

1 Hermaphidite | Are you a purple cow?


sandatthebeach

:: 2004 10 August :: 12.58am
:: Mood: i feel like an idiot

I want to crawl up in a hole and just die...ok i take taht back.....crawl up in a hole and scream and pull all my hair out until i am no longer able to produce sound and I am bald.....I want to hide forever right now. I feel like such a dumbass.

I'm sorry everyone for what I've become. I need to go "reflect".

1 Hermaphidite | Are you a purple cow?


mudpiegrl

:: 2004 9 August :: 10.40pm
:: Music: breaking benjamen

went to the race today...mushrooms back...my dad was 13/16 with his team of three, my bro 14/16 when i left...jens babysitting.....cathy's here.....neils in gurnee with the rest of the world.....cathy's here and were gonna go for a walk cuz my mum's being super-bitch again.

Are you a purple cow?


sandatthebeach

:: 2004 8 August :: 11.19am
:: Mood: itchy

purple post it notes
And I'm back dudes. Miss me? I've been slacking with the journaling a lot. ::Shrugs::

So let me tell you...I just finished the best two weeks of my summer....tiring yes...but awesome nonetheless. Let's just say I have so much more confidence for our upcoming musical...and I mean I'm more determined to get an actual part rather than just resorting to the chorus (I gave up thinking that I even had a chance at the other roles because...let's just say I'm not the world's greatest actor..I'm sorry...ACTRESS lol). These past two weeks have been so beneficial...I've learned a great deal...I'm sad that it had to end so soon. :-(

I had my recital on Friday...it was so sweet. That's probably the most fun I've had during a performance. This recital was a bit different...rather than having individuals stand up on stage, sing their song, then sit back down...we all had select scenes we had to perform from different musicals that were assigned to us beginning of the week (yes, that's right...we all learned a new song and had to memorize a monologue in 4 days because we weren't given our songs/monologues until Tuesday). We also had a radio drama that we performed....we basically all stood up on stage with music stands in front of us and read through a script....with commercials because afterall it was a RADIO drama.

So yes, that was my week...I've learned a great deal and I've improved not only vocally, but socially along with my stage presence. I say socially because I learned that I'm capable of making new friends outside of many circle of friends. You see, I'm not the most outgoing person when you first meet me unless I'm with several of my friends....but I've learned to step up and say "Hello" which is a pretty big deal to me. :)

Alright, enough of me rambling...I have to go to church...oh joy. <-- the period (.) was intended to express my lack of excitement.

Always, Sandy

1 Hermaphidite | Are you a purple cow?


Anytngbtordinary

:: 2004 7 August :: 10.51pm
:: Mood: blah
:: Music: Prayer- Disturbed

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

I really needed that scream.

Im starting to realize its pretty near impossible to be happy.

I don't try to make others unhappy...i hope you all realize that.

I never make decesions with out thinking about how it will affect others.

Sometimes you just have to do something for yourself though don't you?

But when you make decisions in hopes of making yourself happy...the misery of others can destroy you alone.

I am sorry that I am not exactly the person you are looking for.

I am sorry I cause drama...because I am definitely the only one who does it you know?

I am sorry that you may think I only think about myself.

I'm sorry I am going crazy and that I am dragging you down with me.

I am sorry I am falling apart and taking it out on you.

You never should've met me. It only brought pain.

I am so sorry for everything.

No sarcasm there.

2 Hermaphidites | Are you a purple cow?


mudpiegrl

:: 2004 6 August :: 5.12pm


1 Hermaphidite | Are you a purple cow?


sandatthebeach

:: 2004 5 August :: 12.57am
:: Mood: sleepy

calculator
I feel weird. Am I the only person who's had a pretty good week? I mean, granted I've been tired as hell every day but it's been awesome. I'm really enjoying what I've been doing for the past week and a half. I abosolutely love it! I actually feel....good. It wasn't until last week that I finally admitted that I'm not tone deaf! I'm not going around going "Oh, I'm the best there ever was" because whoa damn...that is no where near true....I need to reach 30 something before I'll be considered awesome....maybe. But I realized I don't suck as much as I've always thought I did. That "voice" inside has been hiding all these years and I finally got a quick preview of it before it fully develops. It feels awesome to know that I'm capable of singing a certain way. It's such a rush. High notes being a rush? Yeah, whatever....what's more of a rush to me (now) is hearing my voice improve when I position my jaw differently. It's truly amazing and it's such a great feeling. The only thing I really don't like about this workshop is the hours. It's so freakin' long. I'm exhausted by the time I come home. In the past 3 weeks, I've only really gone out once. I've left the house but usually because I have a certain purpose. I'm too tired to leave the house. I just want to sleep...but then I remember I have to practice...and then I never get to it because I am Queen of Procrastination. ::Sigh::

I'm feeling very sleepy now...I'm gonna go to bed. That's what I said 2 hours ago but I never did because I decided I should run before I do....and then I needed to go in the shower because I was hot and sweaty and smelly....so here I am now...sitting in front of the computer screen about to pass out because I'm so sleepy.

So I go now. Goodnight.

Always, Sandy

2 Hermaphidites | Are you a purple cow?


goose

:: 2004 5 August :: 12.02am
:: Mood: CRAP, Thanks guys

Not so Happy
i feel like crap! CRAP! CRAP!


so i spent the majority of the day bragging about how great spencer is, then i get a text message, he misses me, so i call him...doesnt want to talk he's with friends...so i go to work call again...he doesnt get it...so screw the suprise visit, guess he really didnt miss me after all


i talked to james todd today, he's only 18, thats crazy sweet, i got hyper a little but not too much spun in spinny chair got dizzy..he wanted me to answer his cell phone too which was weird but ummmmmmm today sucked, thank you all! BYE!

6 Hermaphidites | Are you a purple cow?


mudpiegrl

:: 2004 4 August :: 11.16pm
:: Mood: drained
:: Music: Enya

Fucking relaxing bath...
im gonna pop mr. bubble's bubble

set fire to burt's bees hives

shoot dove

put venus in a good fly trap

and rip apart all the water molecules in the universe.

yes.

my bath sucked.

i inhaled bubbles.....and it hurts like fuck in the bronchial tube...

then i got soap in my eye from burt's bees...

the water wouldnt get hot...

the other day i cut myself with the razor

and im cursing dove although its done nothing but run out on me.

not to mention, my brother walked in on me...it wasnt that bad ::shrugs:: although i think i would have preffered someone else...



anyway.

ive been a real basket case this week....i cleaned the whole downstairs

Mood swings like CRAZY!

Attracting the male more

and crazy driving

yup...im not even gonna bother writing about today...its not that intresting to anyone but jen...and she was there...

basically i felt like a little kid all day...

1 Hermaphidite | Are you a purple cow?


goose

:: 2004 4 August :: 12.58am

The Village
I must say I am proud of myself. Yes circumstances are different but I got through this movie with no nightmares...yet.

Before you make fun of me you should know this, when Signs came out i had a lot of things going on and after i saw it i slept in my parents room for 2 weeks. Now i can pretty much guarantee you that you do not know what was going on in my life now. Only 2 people know that and if you think you know...you dont.

So yeah its not only because i was scared of the movie, but i can never be sure you see there waere many things going on, many therapisits i was talking to, many people in my house, i went insane but only for a month...you dont know what im talking about trust me.


so anyway aback to the being proud of myself part...woo hoo 1 night with no nightmares! :)

Are you a purple cow?


goose

:: 2004 4 August :: 12.35am

LIKE 2 WEEKS AGO SPENCER WAS VERY SWEET LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT IT...

FIRST I WAS GROUNDED AND I COULDT SEE HIM BUT HE STOPPED BY ANYAY AND BROUGHT ME FLOWERS

THEN THE NEXT DAY I WAS STILL GROUNDED AND HE GOT ME SECRET WINDOW...


AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW


ALSO HE WENT TO MICHAELS AND BOUGHT ME A SHIRT SO I COULD TIE DYE...IT TURNED OUT LIKE CRAP BUT IT WAS FUN


AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

BTW FUZZ YOU STILL HAVE MY DVD...


LOVE YA SPENCY! :)

Are you a purple cow?


sweetyas

:: 2004 30 July :: 12.45am
:: Mood: ecstatic

Books
i've recently finished this book and i was like omg its awesome....and hten me and mel started talking about writers and books we were reading and i was like you shud read this book and shes like omg i love that book!

We had a "you read that book and liked it me 2" "didnt u love the part whent hat happened"

So i recommend to all of you who read this journal (patrice ) to read the book BECAUSE its awesome adn (not directed at patrice) it teaches you an important lesson i wont tell you what it is. The writing is really cool.

You Dont Know Me by David Klass

1 Hermaphidite | Are you a purple cow?


sandatthebeach

:: 2004 28 July :: 11.25pm
:: Mood: anxious

chocolate covered raisins
Oh man, get this: You know the recital I'll be in on Friday? The one for my vocal workshop thingy? Well, oh man this is exciting, I get to perform it with a jazz trio. I know! How cool is that? The jazz trio consists of...I believe...a piano, acoustic bass, and drums. I know...isn't that insane and completely cool? I'm excited!!! So yeah, I'm looking forward to that.

Always, Sandy

2 Hermaphidites | Are you a purple cow?


Anytngbtordinary

:: 2004 28 July :: 7.12pm

QUIZ!
[x] Part 1 -- The Basics [x]
What's your name? :::Jackie
Birthplace :::Hereish
Age :::17
Age you act :::Can be either older or younger
Current location :::Here, in front of my computer
Eye color :::Blue
Hair color :::Blonde
Right, lefty or ambidextrous? :::Right
Zodiac sign? :::Scorpio
Height? :::5'4'' ish
[x] Part 2 -- Describe... [x]
Your heritage/nationality :::I'm American... Part Greek though
Your hair :::Its long...and blonde...layered
Your fears :::Being alone, getting hurt... i dont like germs...
Your perfect room :::Eh dont care too much
What you practically do in a day :::Camp, come on the computer, watch Degrassi, then usually hang out with someone
[x] Part 3 -- What is/are... [x]
Words you overuse :::Lately, a lot of bad words... Um... You tell me.
Phrases you overuse :::I know theres tons...but i cant think of them right now.
Your first thought when you wake up :::Shit...another day..can i stay asleep? Dreams are so much better than real life
Your greatest accomplishment :::I guess im not in a good enough mood to think about good things
Something you want to do :::Get out of this country, help the world, be happy.
[x] Part 4 -- This or that [x]
Pepsi or Coke :::Neither
McDonald's or Burger Kings :::McDonalds
Britney Spears or Christina Aguilera :::Eh... I like Christina's voice
Chocolate or vanilla :::Chocolate
Adidas or Nike :::Um? Adidas
Black or white :::Black
Bills or Coins ((Think $$$)) :::Bills
Burgers or hot dogs :::Cheese Burgers
Egypt or France :::Hmm... Both...i really want to visit both
Rock or rap :::Rock
[x] Part 5 -- Do you...[x]
Smoke :::no
Cuss :::yes
Sing well :::Doubt it
Sing in the shower :::Yes
Talk to yourself --a lot-- :::not usually....
Believe in yourself :::Nope
Like taking these longass surveys? :::nope
Play an instrument :::nope
Want to go to college? :::Yes
Want to get married? :::not sure
Want to have children? :::yes
Think you're a health freak? :::Yes
Get along with your parents :::No
Get along with your siblings? :::No
Think you're popular :::No
[x] Part 6 -- In the past month have you..[x]
Gone out of state :::yes
Drank alchohal :::no
Smoke :::yes
Get high :::no
Done any drugs :::no
Eaten an entire box of oreos :::no
Been on stage :::yes
Gone skinny dipping :::no
Been dumped :::no
Dyed your hair :::yes
Stolen anything :::no
[x] Part 7 -- Your friends! =D [x]
Craziest :::Can I skip this section? I think i will
Loudest :::
Most shy :::
Blondest :::
Smartest :::
Kindest :::
Best personality :::
Most talented :::
Best singer :::
Most ghetto :::
Drama Queen ((or King XP)) :::
Pain in the ass :::
The one you just want to strangle to death ((Homer Simpson style)):::
Funniest :::
Best person for advice :::
Dependable :::
Trustworthy :::
Druggie :::
Most likely to end up in jail :::
Person you've known the longest :::
[x] Part 8 -- The Last... [x]
Last dream :::Last one i can remember...was the one where 2 of my friends almost let me drown when we went rafting...then they ditched me
Last nightmare :::Above
Car ride :::driving home from work?
Last time you cried :::Yesterday...camp, home, Brittany's car, concert (in the seats) then concert on the blanket
Last movie seen :::Bourne Supremecy
Last movie rented :::Mystic River
Last book read :::Hm wow...don't know
Last word said :::Don't know..havent talked out loud for like an hour
Last curse word said :::Damn it.
Last time you laugh :::Last night talking with Scott
Last phone call :::About an hour ago
Last CD played :::Audioslave
Last song you listened to :::What You Are
Last annoyance :::My mom
Last IM :::Q
Last weird encounter :::Dunno
Last person you hugged :::Neil last night
Last person you yelled at :::My mom
Last time you wore a skirt :::A few days ago
Last time you've been evil :::Last night? Only because i was angry/ upset
Sarcastic? :::I don't know that im all that sarcastic anymore...but probably a few times today
Last time you fought with your parents :::Today
Last time you wished upon a star :::I'll do that tonight
Played Truth or Dare :::Long long time ago
Spent quality time alone :::Right now...i guess
[x] Part 9 -- I swear this is the last one! -- Randomness [x]
Are you talking to someone on AIM :::Not anymore
Do you feel lonely :::Yes
Ever TP'd someone's house :::No
How about egging someone's house :::No
Do you not like dislike not like me? :::Huh?
Ain't Eminem and 50 Cent just fine? :::No
Yo Momma :::No yo Momma!
Ever been so hungry you felt like you could eat the person next to you? :::no
What do you think of George Bush? :::Ick
Any secret fetishes? :::...
Do you like to wear chains? O_o :::no
How many languages do you speak? :::1
Damn.. are your fingers tired? Cause mine sure are! :::no
Glad this is over? ((Say yes and I'll stalk you =P)) :::not really...on to the next one

Bored? ((Over 100 questions)) brought to you by BZOINK!

2 Hermaphidites | Are you a purple cow?

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