mudpiegrl
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2004 2 January :: 3.59am
yes guys...im aware that a good amount of the bad is my fault. no one did anything to me. nick didnt hurt me. jackie was always sweet and innocent. lisa listened intently when the tears ran. i ripped apart the group. sorry i didnt tell you all before...its not all something you go struting around about. i made hul go into hiding. fuck if i did soemthing wrong why wont anyone tell me!?!? if im hiding from it why wont you show me! do the same fucking thing that ive either done or would do for you! the same fucking thing that killed everything anyone knew and cared about!!!!! im sorry i really am for anytime i hurt you. for anytime i cryed on your shoulder. for anytime i whispered secrets in your ear. for anytime i told your secret. for anytime i listened. for anytime i asked. for caring. for attempting to help. for giving more pain. i realise it all made it worse now.
7 Hermaphidites |
Are you a purple cow?
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mudpiegrl
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2004 2 January :: 3.33am
:: Mood: contemplative
"Downfall"
~Matchbox Twenty~
*More Than You Think You Are*
Wonder how you sleep
I wonder what you think of me
If I could go back
Would you have ever been with me
I want you to be unused
I want you to remember
I want you to believe in me
I want you on my side
Come on and lay it down
I've always been with you
Here and now
Give all that's within you
Be my savior
And I'll be your downfall
Mmm mmm mmm
Here we go again
Ashamed of being broken in
We're getting off track
I wanna get you back again
I want you to trouble me
I wanted you turning down
I want you to agree with me
I want so much so bad
Come on and lay it down
I've always been with you
Here and now
Give all that's within you
Be my savior
And I'll be your downfall
Mmm mmm mmm
Yeah, be my savior
(Only love can save us now)
(Don't lay me down)
(Only love can save us now)
I'll be your downfall
(I'll be your downfall)
(Ah, love can save us now)
(Don't save me now)
Lay it down
I've always been with you
Hear me now
With all that's within you
Be my savior
And I'll be your downfall
Mmm mmm mmm
Now I'm back on my own
Hear my feet, they're made of stone
Man, I make you go where I go
Well hell, you, can I take you home
Well, I'm coming home on my back
Kissing me, your lips painted black
Saying oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh
Let me be your downfall
Oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh
Let me be your downfall, baby
Are you a purple cow?
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mudpiegrl
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2004 1 January :: 6.17pm
:: Mood: accomplished
:: Music: jeremy-pearl jam
good
i finally know what am good for! yup...teaching lessons...not math and english (although i throw that in for free) nor love and caring...leave that to everyone else...i am a teacher of trust. who, when and how to trust. more like not. through betrayl and hurt i teach such things. how to hate is a lesson to end the session, as we all need that somehow.
yes, ive discovered im a tick...i coax myself under your skin by offering companionship in return for a place to live. some of you can extract me before i entirely envolope myself in your fleshy substances. but others of you i live peacefully in until i feel the hunger burn in my stomach, at which time i bite...after which you may burn me from your body...but some dont...some just pinch, hoping to squish me enough to stop the biting...but you must know...'twill all come again...until i am gone. then i must find another host, someone unsuspecting. but the world can only last so long. you will tell your friends and soon no one will accept my burrowing.
1 Hermaphidite |
Are you a purple cow?
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mudpiegrl
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2004 1 January :: 4.43pm
:: Mood: curious
:: Music: radio
horoscope
Greetings Virgo
Here is your horoscope for the week of December 29 through January 4
Your desire to mix with those who may be able to help you in the future may be particularly powerful. It would help you to be a little more patient and not quite so pushy at this time. You have what it takes to achieve the goals you have long desired. Venus conjuncts Neptune, and Cupid could be on patrol, so be warned. Mercury, your ruling planet, continues to be retrograde, and this may be causing you some frustration. Stay calm and know that you are meant to try and relax at this time.
1 Hermaphidite |
Are you a purple cow?
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mudpiegrl
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2004 1 January :: 3.04pm
:: Mood: morose
:: Music: one oh two point three XLC
simpson's monopoly
im not really in that mood...i liked the sound of the word...but i dont know what to do with myself. i want to go places but no where is open cuz everyone was out late last night getting drunk/high and probably all have awful hangovers. neils still at spencer's and jen's in chicago. i havent even tried sandy yet...but i still odnt wanna get dressed. there isnt a point. so i tried making beads...but it was an ugly pattern and i got bored really fast. i have to say, last night sucked. it was the worst new year's i think i've had. it even beat the badness of last year, which i spent babysitting kids i didnt even know. monopoly was fun, i wanted to keep playing but kyle and spencer started getting restless and no one was paying attention and shit...so it ended. all the other girls were calling each other on their phones, so am glad i wasnt over there cuz i dont have a phone and would be like woo fun... the guys missed the ball drop an d all that...they were getting sparkling grape juice stuff...that tasted strangely like sparkling wine...fermented would you say? its been awhile since ive written; hope you guys dont mind if i dont go back and read all your entries...i wouldnt know whats going on, cept for sandy, cuz i talked to her recently. my dad was sick this morning and it was strange to come down and see him sleeping on the couch with the tv on. i watched barbie of swan lake the other night and it actually wasnt all that bad. it was to the music of tchaikovsky and the little elves, played by the little kelly and the little boy character dolls, had the funniest accents and i liked them. yup. :) okie i think thats all thats remotely interesting
Are you a purple cow?
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mudpiegrl
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2003 22 December :: 1.24am
:: Mood: restless
:: Music: tv
three days~
three days til xmas and i cant wait...but i can...like i need to get some prezies still but if i havent contacted you yet, the afternoon of the twenty third everyone shud come over and get their gifts. um...yes...not much to say...gnight
9 Hermaphidites |
Are you a purple cow?
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mudpiegrl
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2003 21 December :: 3.38am
:: Mood: tired
:: Music: buzzz
::twitch::
Tomboy
What kind of little girl were YOU?
brought to you by Quizilla
oooh believe it or not, i loved climbing trees!!!
so, i wrote an entry, it had soemthing about sandy's entries being too long and the fact that ive heard the new incubus song three times and its in my head and i love it so much and i cant wait til february third for it to come out, which is shortly after january twentyninth, when the linkin park concert is. i went to TSO and it was awesome! and ummm.....i babysat...freaky friday(eh..) um....sleepy time!
Are you a purple cow?
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sweetyas
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2003 18 December :: 12.06pm
:: Mood: tired
tODAY
Hey, so i finished by term paper and i am ecastic (sp?) no not really, im just sorta mellow. I think it sucks but its a paper and the important part is that it is done. But nowi have to study for my french quiz on the imperfect, oh i hate hate hate hate it. GRR. ive been in french for a long time since seventh grade btu still to this day i dont know hwo to use it or when and how to conjugate it, i feel like such an idiot im not kidding. I mean maybe if i had not tired i wouldnt care btu i did try. Yea im goin gto sleep soon.
The whole thing with the pictures is killing me. I feel like its all my fault. GOD DAMN, parents if ur kid rebels u cant beat the shit out of them they will just continue to rebel. Why do I have tobe in the middle of this???? Im so scared that my paretns will find out, omg if they do i would just... i dunno, i wouldnt have a choice in doing anythign. I hate being in the middle of this. Why me??? God darn it. its so much pressure and i dont do well under pressure. I have to keep two friends by telling the truth, and the truth aint pretty,but i cant lie, and i wont it makes no sense to lie. When somone says who called perons, dont u assuem the first person who called them but no, me being stupid just assumed first person u have to assume secone adn third adn fourht adn fifth. GRR. I need a break, i cant wait till this week is over. I hate being hte person who causes ppl to get beat up, and i didnt mean to do anything, i just shuda said no. Thats all NO. I hate this, i really do. I wanna get out of this. I guess reputation is the most important thing u have in this world, thats the thing thats keeping me out of that circle. Im so worried. i hope they dont find the pic with me in it, i hope narmeen rips it up, plz do grl. Yea do. Its all my fault.
Are you a purple cow?
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mudpiegrl
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2003 15 December :: 1.16pm
:: Mood: hot
:: Music: ::type, type::
so long, so long
"its been awhile" since ive written in this thing! i think a whole two days! but its all result of getting home late and laziness...in fact, ive become enthralled with the sherlock homles stories and therefore havent felt like turning on the computer...i came up with an idea for asking neil to turnabout. you know how the alphabet can correspond with twenty six numbers? for instance: A is 1, C is 3, Z is 26...and so on...yea...and my original idea was to give him cars, like matchbox (cars the size of match boxes, hence the name) lol...and write notes you know? but what if the numbers spelled out "TURNABOUT" and on the bottom was a poem to give him the hint that its the alphabet numbered cuz god knows i wouldnt get just a bunch of race cars lol...but there are nine letters in turnabout and then i want one with a load of question marks and he leaves for lunch so ill have to give it to benton or something... but yea...::sigh:: that was what i was thinking about while i couldnt sleep last night. jen was singing ohhh ohhh oohh...just like in latin my arm is shaking cuz i actually did work in gym ::bows head and shakes head:: im a failure. speaking of which, i got a thirty nine out of a hundred on my research paper; it was fifty nine but it was two days late hmmmmm...yea...i need to start my mythology project really badly. i dont even knwo what to do for it. sandys wearing her cool shirt today...but almost everyone is wearing pastels its nuts youd think it was easter not xmas! jen is wearing black...sandy light purple, melissa light pink, melanie and i are both light blue (ballad)...and spencer is wearing red. i never thought id see the day that he would wear anything but black. its nuts! like a squirrel! (lol trix, joey!) today i watched spongebob while waiting for jen to pick me up and patrick is eating popcorn in the episode where they dare sandy to take off her helmet and then they have to go on land. well hes eating popcorn and he says "we arent chicken!" then he drops it and proceeds to peck up the popcorn like a chicken lol! it made me laugh! and then there was an advertisement i think for milk and the little girl is sitting in her backyard drinking milk and eating cookies in the summer and she has this pink easter bunny hat, like the ears on. (jill, this reminded me of you) and then she looks at the milk bottle and it says "MILK HELPS YOU GROW" and so she takes the straw and holds in the milk with her finger and pours it on the ants. her mum calls her in and shes washing her plate and then this gigantic ant goes in the window and shes like ::gasp:: and it goes to the picture outside and its the pest control and the guy gets out of the van with the big ant on it...oooh ::sigh:: twas hilarious!
Are you a purple cow?
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mudpiegrl
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2003 13 December :: 3.51pm
:: Mood: creative
:: Music: coheed
quizzies
You are an earth shadow runner. You rusle with the
wind in the trees, pure and natural. You are a
true believer at heart, knowing that you can do
it no matter what has happened in the past.
You can sometimes be taken as a wild,
untameable spirit, but you see things no one
else can.
what kind of shadow runner are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
You are WATER! You are a very gentle element, but
you can be rough when you need to. You are all
over the place and can do tons of things at
once. You calm and chilled out, and some
people consider you cool. But really, you are
hyper and sugarhigh, and you will always be
there for ur buds!
Which Ultimate Power Do You Control?
brought to you by Quizilla
YOU ARE NOT EVIL!!! Oh...My...GaWd! Become a nun
or something! You have never, EVER done
anything particularly evil! Are you a SAINT or
something? geez!
How EVIL are you?
You are a dolphin. You are friendly and
individual. You usually stick with one group
of buds, but you let other join you. You love
horror and comedy movies, listening to the
radio, and hanging with your friends!
what is your inner sea creature?
brought to you by Quizilla
brought to you by Quizilla
You are the Cheetah. You have lightning fast
quips,you are funny, and though you aren't the
most popular person ever, you have friends, and
you'll stick by them no matter what!
What is your inner wildcat?
You are a rainbow jewel(Mystic Fire Topaz). You
are creative and interesting, often judged as a
freak or a queer. All of your friends are a
different as you are, though, so who needs
those popular people. You like to be yourself
and stand out!
What Color Gemstone Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla
brought to you by Quizilla
You are a mystery dream. You show things that
people usually don't understand until a certain
time. You are mystifying and amazing, but you
can be confusing at times.
what kind of dream are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
Are you a purple cow?
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mudpiegrl
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2003 13 December :: 3.41pm
:: Mood: worried
:: Music: coheed and cambria
quizzies
You are a paper clip. You help organize and come in
many colors.Your very useful at times. Other
times your just a loop in the way.Some times
you are a bit confused...:s
What dumb object are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
Pheonix--you are a fighter. you never give up, and
when you fall you get back up, you will always
rise from the ashes, no matter how badly you
burn.
which mystical creature are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
You are the Warrioress. Your are strong and
determined. You are extremely clever, always
standing up for what you believe in. You are a
fighter and will always defend your buds!
are you a witch, an angel, or a warrioress?
brought to you by Quizilla
You are Michelle Branch! You are a funny person,
and the first time you heard your song on the
radio, you turned it up so loud you blew out
your car speakers! You are a normal person,
and you would rather do your own thing than
work with a band.
Which Rock Chick Singer/Songwriter are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
You are a ferret! You are frisky and mischeivious,
and you love to pull pranks and watch the fun!
You are adventurous and lots of fun! You like
to stick with your friends!
what is your inner pet?
brought to you by Quizilla
Are you a purple cow?
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mudpiegrl
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2003 12 December :: 7.22pm
:: Mood: bored
:: Music: radio
xmas
Jorie’s Christmas List of Gasp
~Books
*”White Fluffy Clouds” by Brandon Boyd
* “Leyendas Latinamericanos”
*“The Crucible”
~Cd’s
*Staind (have:14 Shades, Dysfunction)
*Godsmack
*Three Doors Down
*Matchbox Twenty (have:"Yourself or Someone Like You")
~Movies
*The Crucible
*Ever After
*Tuck Everlasting
*A Knight’s Tale
*Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone
*Lord of the Rings I and II
*From Hell
*Amelie
~Gift Certificates
*Kohl’s
*Barnes and Noble
*Hot Topic
*Caribou Coffee
*Hobby Lobby
*Best Buy
~Other
*Hair Brush
*Cute Socks (oink, baa)
*Art Set
*Eeyore and Tigger
*Johnny Comics
*Gir Blanket
2 Hermaphidites |
Are you a purple cow?
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mudpiegrl
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2003 12 December :: 6.36pm
:: Mood: excited
:: Music: radio waiting for incubus song
am soooo excited! new incubus song coming on the radio! theyre coming out with a new cd on third of february and there is a linkin park concert january twenty ninth so jen and i are gonna go and ama take sandy for her christmas present! woo! i cant wait til incubus goes on tour! itll be my third time seeing them in concert! ahhhh yayyyy!
2 Hermaphidites |
Are you a purple cow?
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sweetyas
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2003 12 December :: 2.31pm
:: Mood: calm
:: Music: School
People adn journal entries
Everyone updates their journals durign school and around 1-2 pm. i think its funny. So ye ai joined the trend this is the only tiem i have to update my journal cuz i never do i am a loser. so im gettin better at debating at lunch, i dont think i debated any today, im proud of myself. its a really hard habit to kick (get off, i dunno the word quote thing for it) so yea, i mean 2 yrs of lunch w/jorie, its rather difficult. So nothing is new with me, i wanted to take pics of u guys (ppl from school) but no were too cool, cuz no1 gives me thier pics and i dont 10 yrs from now to be like wait, did i have friends in high school other than ....? (depends if we still hangout ten years from now, i know of atleast one) yea, i have six picsleft, i think im goign to finish them today (khadijah's b-day) or take pics of my family and nature. LaLaLaLaLaLa, hmm "its raining men, hallajuah its raining men" yea thats song is stuck in my head now. i wish i had time to read, i wish i didnt watch as much tv. i mean i can change those things but im not good at doing things like that. NOPE. i think i say "u know what" too much, i cant help it. its like Sup? but i never have an answer adn ppl r like ur a loser. Oh, i tired to straighten my hair, i failed, i gave up on the back adn the front looked good but then u got a big poof in the back. yea i knwo this is useless stuff. i need to know how to make my journal look pretty. ill do that later. Adios, ive got 4 minutes.
Are you a purple cow?
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