mudpiegrl
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2003 5 September :: 2.05pm
Afiag is your Vampire name.
Your name means that you are a Vampire who has many
friends, and few enemies. Other Vampires know
not to cross your vengefull path.
To use your new Vampire name and become a Vampire,
go here:
www.life-blood.cjb.net
What is your Vampire name?
brought to you by Quizilla
You are a TATTOO. You are more costly to get rid of
than to accquire, but not always permanent.
(Please vote for me...Thank you)
What Kind Of Body Art/ Modification Are You?
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You should be dating an Aries.
21 March - 19 April
This person is a leader, very energetic, always
helping others to achieve their dreams. Though
at times, Aries can be be bossy, jealous, and
selfish, this ram enjoys sexy new challenges in
bed!
What Zodiac Sign Are You Attracted To?
brought to you by Quizilla
schizoid
Which Personality Disorder Do You Have?
brought to you by Quizilla
TRIX! Are you the bunny of doom??
Are you a purple cow?
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mudpiegrl
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2003 5 September :: 1.57pm
:: Mood: annoyed
:: Music: the fucking tv
grr
the god damn smoke is in my face! just like always, the tv is on loud...just like always.... the other one is blaring over it...just like every minute between 5 and 10...im aggravated because my dad is trying to control the shit he doesnt know anything about...how new...::sigh:: my head hurts, everyone is at the football game...grr! i want to leave, ive gotten an hour of driving so i cant go anymore (went to gurnee today) i want to leave though! ama find how to put pictures in html.
Are you a purple cow?
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mudpiegrl
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2003 1 September :: 6.32am
You are a true nature girl!
Which Ultimate Beautiful Woman are You?
brought to you by Quizilla
You come from Dark Water. You are solitary and
find peace in yourself, or maybe you're
turmoiled but pull off peace.
Where Did Your Soul Originate?
brought to you by Quizilla
Are you a purple cow?
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mudpiegrl
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2003 1 September :: 2.34am
:: Mood: happy
:: Music: "colours of the wind"~Pocohontas
HIyA!
am going to homecoming! erm...i dont know if im excited or nervous or scared or what...well let me explain~am excited just cuz i got flowers, well basically anyway. half of it is surprise...i had no idea he was going to ask so soon. its six weeks {as stacey so kindly just informed me ::bows to stacey::} until then, and i really hope we stay together until then. am sort of worried that jackie will be mad at me, or pretend shes not yet making it so blatently obvious she is. stacey has already said "i wish i was going to homecoming", which, it is also true that she will be asked sometime during the next six weeks::again, bows to staceys time lapse statement::. I want Q to ask trixy really bad; i think they would make a cute couple, although, trix, if you are reading this, i will nto tell him to. its his decision, ive already said i think you guys would be cute together, and i explained "our plan" and he laughed, in agreeance i suppose. ooo btw, jackie and benton and i got our zoo pics today! they are really funny! well anyway. Jackie is going to get asked by benton, because wender will give way to his power, although benton may hold off as an effect to wender. ::shrugs:: eh! itll work itself out. sandy...well...i think well get her someone...i think kyle and lisa are set, even though they arent doing too well, they are too attached to break up...spencer and jillian too...i dont think they are done yet. sandy, wender could take or benton...depending...chris broke up with jenny, so he'll have to find someone! ::gasp:: am helping fritz with creative ways to ask his girlfriend...but i cant think of any...she swims which he might be able to do soemthing with...o well...post any suggestions...::sigh:: yesterday i bought a four by four piece of wallboard. am drawing a load of disney characters on it...twill be loads of fun! and then i will paint them! woo! i think i will give it to jackie or jennifer...jennifer because of her new house but jackie because she loves disney. [HammeTrucci: i was just telling him how it was perfect that i asked you out today and i was going to ask you to homecoming
battlestarre: and what did he say
HammeTrucci: yeah said "beautiful"] well...gnight...
1 Hermaphidite |
Are you a purple cow?
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sweetyas
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2003 31 August :: 10.40pm
:: Mood: full
Viral
Um, this is the sunday so im like all drained and such cuz all i have been doing is working like OMG, i have worked over 18 hours right. Well there is an advantage to working, i get to hang out with viral, alright i have a HUGE crush on him. Yes im a loser. Hes like 20, which isnt old but it is older. He sorta asked me out like 5 times. He wanted to know if i would go to a party with him after work or a movie. but me being me i said i cant, not no. cuz now its time to think, do i want to go out with him? i mean its a bigger choice then u think, its like really big. religious wise too. i dont know. ill decide later bye.
3 Hermaphidites |
Are you a purple cow?
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sweetyas
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2003 26 August :: 10.21pm
:: Mood: better
:: Music: none
Nemo
well, i was bored so i took this quiz so this goes with the quote on my phone!!!!!!
You're Dory! You're a total airhead! And you
probably even suffer from short term memory
loss. But you are a friendly, hospitable, and
sociable person. You love to chat with people
and probably even tell them your life story!
But sometimes you can get anoying with your
yapping so calm down a bit and take a deeeeeeep
breath.
What character from Finding Nemo are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
Are you a purple cow?
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sweetyas
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2003 26 August :: 8.39pm
:: Mood: sore
:: Music: None
school
I dont know what it is about me that disappoints me, i mean when i look at myself i hate me. i wish i was better u know what my parents want, i dont think ill ever reach that. ive worked so hard, u know being in honors and everything, i mean i tried i cant stand it. ive honestly had enough, i wanna drop all my honor classes and just take regular u know. like math i actually like it because i get it, i can sit there and understand. but today was like crap. we had physics, we did our first lab, and i was the idiot of the group i had no idea what to do i mean honeslty i have no idea what a vector is adn what is its magnatide. i dont care. i honestly hate physics, stupid stupid teachers, why ddint they just let me take biology! i mean its the smae aint it, but no lets ruin yasamins life and not offer it at the right time. i wanna take chem again. i need more regular classes, where i dont notice my brain thinking u know. a class that i believe i can get a B in u know, not my stupid ol ass classes. i hate me. i dont want to be me. im not close to as good as my parents standards. u have no idea how much that hurts. when i asked my dad to switch classes i just broke down and cried, i cant stand that. i dotn want to worry about them, uknow they got my brothers maybe they can reach their expectations u know. i wanna just drop out of school and be a perminant tech. its so much easier u know, and slowly ill be in charge. i wanna sleep. ive had enough for one day u know. alright, im gonna do my hw now. oh god i hate school.
1 Hermaphidite |
Are you a purple cow?
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mudpiegrl
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2003 25 August :: 12.37pm
:: Mood: sick and playful
:: Music: matchbox twenty...fifth song now?
a story to tell your friends
The Circus
There was once a man who was boring, but considered himself normal. He wasnt to fond of his redundent life, as every day he would get up, shower, shave, and go to work. The same sized pile of work with the same type of information always sat on his desk. Once a week, on thursday, his boss would come in between 9:23 and 9:39 and tell him off for something or other, but that was about the only thing that varied. Everyday, during lunch break he would go to subway, getting the turkey with swiss on rye, topped with tomatos, lettuce, mustard and mayo with a bottle of water. He would return to work, do more paper work in his white shirt and blue tie. at four, he would leave, only to return to the small tidy apartment and watch tv. An hour before bed, he would always read the newspaper. The next day, it would happen again. One summer night, he was flipping the page of the newspaper, and he caught a glance of an advertisement. It made him take a second look. The ad was for a circus that was coming in a couple of weeks. He thought,
"hm, maybe a slight change would be alright"
and so, after two more weeks of his normally boring life, he went to the circus. Upon entering the grounds, he noticed there were hundreds of little kids. He hated little kids. They made messes and were very disorganised and didnt have any manners. But, as he had nothing better to do than return to his dull routine, he sauntered into the big top tent. Children were screaming all around him, but soon the show started.
He saw acrobats and trick-doing elephants, tigers that could jump through fire burning hoops, ringmasters who spoke boldly of thier talents, an unbelievable amount of clowns climbing out of a car, annoyingly squeaking and honking. Everything that one would expect to see at a circus. Some of the excitement on stage died and the kids began to get rowdy again.
Not soon enough for the man, an old clown came out into the center of the tent. The crowd quieted. The old clown pulled off his hat, and proceeded to pull out a rabbit, and in a barney-like voice, asked
"what's this, kids?"
They replied,
"IT'S A RABBIT!"
He let the rabbit hop away and pulled out a kangaroo.
"What's this, kids?"
Even louder, they yelled
"IT'S A KANGAROO!"
Next, the clown yanked a donkey out of his hat.
"What's this kids?"
THe man, now slightly annoyed by this clowns condensending questions, shouted out,
"IT'S AN ASS!"
The children gasped and parents turned to find the corrupter. The clown, thinking quick on his feet, said,
"And so are you!" The audience laughed with delight and the clowns wit. The man, angered, got up and left. He went home and, rather than watching TV and reading the paper at night, began to look for insults to throw back at the clown. He searched random magazines and websites. Asking all his friends, and only getting laughed at, he kept his search to himself.
One day, he was scanning the newspaper for a reply, and again caught the ad with his peripheral vision. Getting a second look at it, he saw the circus was in at the same place, the same time as two years before. He decided to go, but this time, he was not bothered by the children running around screaming at his feet. He marched right into the big top tent. He watched the show, every moment of it, intent on waiting for the old clown to come out. Sure enough, after all the other attractions, the clown emerged.
His routine was the same;
"what's this, kids?"
"IT'S A RABBIT!"
"What's this, kids?"
Even louder,
"IT'S A KANGAROO!"
the clown yanked a donkey out of his hat. The man yelled,
"IT'S AN ASS!"
Again, parents gasped and covered thier children's ears. The clown replied,
"And so are you!".
This time the man was prepared.
He yelled,
"FUCK YOU, CLOWN!"
1 Hermaphidite |
Are you a purple cow?
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mudpiegrl
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2003 25 August :: 12.31pm
:: Mood: sick...after five minutes!
:: Music: 3rd song of matchbox twenty
confusion
several recent entries from the thoughts notebook...yup.
How can it be that one moment happiness fills every cell of my body, and moments later, sadness ensues? can it be, that the moment contains words that puncture the balloon filling my heart? Shall I cry, or will I laugh? I ask myself several times recently-what is depression? Could I be depressed? Or is happiness just ever-so-often interrupted by evil thoughts? I think maybe we only use ten percent of our brains because we can only control five percent or so. Humans don’t like what they cant control. They avoid it at all costs. If it cannot be CONTROLLED, then we assume alterations, as if we are only factory machines. Our feelings sometimesescape our grasp, therefore we claim (v).to be insane ; creating a backwards perception of FEAR. But smile and ignore all, and happiness shall reign, correct? Hm? Another thought completed at 1:28 AM, the 7th day of the 7th month in the two thousand and third year or our lord, who happens to be another fraud of our world. {if you believe differently, that is fine, I accept your beliefs and I ask of you to do the same.}
Are you a purple cow?
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mudpiegrl
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2003 25 August :: 12.30pm
:: Mood: still sick...all day..can you imagine?!
:: Music: same
how sweet?
It’s amazing how one word can make or break your day, jump start your heart or puncture it, run adrenaline through your mind or sorrow.
2 Hermaphidites |
Are you a purple cow?
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mudpiegrl
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2003 25 August :: 12.28pm
:: Mood: sick
:: Music: still matchbox twenty
sort of poet
(Sorry, am not really a poet, but I like to put words together. So for anyone who is a real poet, please deal with it and don’t criticize it.)
My heart beats unbearably fast
when my mind is clouded by thoughts
of the beautifully formed features;
an unmistakable silhouette,
a meaningful black and white.
Just another disgraceful human any other
but a swan pulled by the winds
of a destructive tornado.
How can it be that only a week has passed?
Under the influence
of his never-ending potion
Sleeping sweetly, watched by my eyes;
I hear your breath,
feel your heart beat unforgivably,
relaxing me to sleep tranquilly
by your side; sounds of chaos
whisper around our serenity.
Are you a purple cow?
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mudpiegrl
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2003 25 August :: 12.27pm
:: Mood: sick
:: Music: same
stacey's house one night
(24/6) I want to write so very badly. Words are coming to mind in a wonderful combination. I’m half-tired. I was laying on him listening to his heart, feeling it take advantage of the soft architecture of his ribs, the same way I was, and only mine wasn’t a consistent beating. I love how his curls wrap around my fingers when I run them throught the gelled rings. They fit in my fingers perfectly. Even though the room is unbelieveably hot, I love laying on him to feel the warmth of his skin. He has such a gentle touch; I feel safe and protected, as if I will never feel pain again. But I know I will. I know how it will hurt. I know what I will miss most. How I wish to be a poet, to put my words beautifully, unlike the rough, foreign way they are here. Some are not as happy as I feel like a balloon; she sits before, glancing almost longingly at him and me. I see the way her eyes water when she hears of the sweetness anyone of us receives. She only feels misery, from the one who made her happy only twice. Two times that ended nearly as fast as they’d begun; she held the highest for only moments before reality set in. Reality that he wouldn’t change for her, and she would only feel like a toy, no, an appliance. IF she lets it continue, she will become rusty and stained. Can she break the tie she’s been meaning to for a small three months? Or will it continue, making her pain swim through her heart? Another stares as if hers is perfect. Does she see how she is only bound; in more than one way is she bound though. She is tied to him, to the title. Bound to be hurt, pain actually slicing as easily as cake through the recently healed surface. Once the scab is broken, it will bleed again, twice as thick, doubled in amount. She will remember, denying the memory, believing ‘twas only a dream this time. One more, whose denial matches the supposed mythology of a unicorn or centaur. She conceals her tears as if never there, pretends she never realized the amount he doesn’t want her-the way he pushes her away releases its secret. Ah, the drama of the theatre people. It’s funny how I see it as if in the audience, as another, unattached, yet I am blind to my own soon-to-be pain. It may be just as clear, but it is hidden in the darkness. I watch the show, not knowing I am part of it myself.
Are you a purple cow?
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mudpiegrl
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2003 25 August :: 12.25pm
:: Mood: sick
:: Music: same as last
Quote on my wall
(5/5) Life isn’t bad; it’s a big, white wall. Feelings and thoughts are different-sized brushes and you choose your friends like colours…sometimes carefully, others randomly. With these tools, you paint your life. Sometimes, colours don’t mix to what you expected. Every once in a wonderful while, you don’t need to fill in a space with colour. It’s ok to mess up and paint over it. And sometimes, your paint runs out. All part of the masterpiece.
Are you a purple cow?
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mudpiegrl
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2003 25 August :: 12.24pm
:: Mood: sick
:: Music: matchbox twenty
NoTeBoOk of the PaSt
(6/6)The world makes me wonder. So many people are depressed, failing to have compliance with their thoughts, derogatory opinions, and negative ideas. So much of the world is sad. Emotionally confused. Scared. Afraid. Unloved. Afraid to love; to trust. Thinking no one cares, no one’s there. So many want another-doesn’t matter who. Someone to tell them the answer. Someone to wake them up. Someone to end the never-ending war. Another treaty with life; a bargain with the devil. Just anything, done by anyone-because they believe someone else can do it. Believing incapability, giving in to fear. So caught up in trying to get someone to love you, do you love you? What is depressed; sad; unhappy; discontent? Another theory; observation? Yet another creation of the human mind? Who has decided? Am I strange? Odd? Weird? Wrong? Backwards? Challenged? Am I different -too different to know? Is it natural to be sad? And those who are happy are diseased? Have I betrayed my kind? Who says I don’t stand while they move? Am I backwards; insane? What says it is not just me that belongs in the nut house rather than you-all of you. The 80% of knowingly depressed and medicated in my school; Those who spend time in prison, asylums, houses? Who said humans are not meant to be sad? Majority being normal, are we not odd in this kingdom of content animals? Is there so few who are willing to fight this imagined master? What monster really exists? Do the dandelions speak? Can we see the dead? Do we all experience the same thing and take it differently? Or do we refuse to admit what we see for fear of rejection, and so agree? Is majority normality?
Are you a purple cow?
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