that is so retro

:: 2004 28 May :: 11.07pm
:: Mood: contemplative

school is out. o-u-t. good bye atlantic. many memories. now tears. i will miss all of u very much.

y did the bus driver want a pic of me and danielle 2gether? *shrug*

y did the bus driver take amanda out to lunch? rape. *shrug*

s0o 2morrow... i'm going to the vet. no. not for MY shots.... not today anyways, j.k. but i have to put my cat to sleep. 17 years we've had her. i've only known her 4 16 years. but still... she has the same birthday as i do too. gosh. its sad. she's not a normal cat. she gives u hugs, she loves u.... she's wonderful. but she must go. *cries* my mom can't stand to see her in pain. but i just don't want to "kill" her. i'd rather wait until she dies in my arms. disgusting, but i love her. and then... i've got to make sure she will sleep in my bed tonight. i don't wanna lose her. i want another cat. just for comfort, but its not the same, s0o i don't. but... gosh its so hard. what a great way to start off summer.

on a brighter note. we had fun tonight. ashley c hit a mailbox. gave them $60 to fix it. lmao. duct tape for the mirror. zach's jokes. "AND ALL THE SUDDEN SHE WAS RIDING HIM" +kids look over+ coleslaw flying across the steak & shake lol. the beach & pictures, "what the hell were u guys on?"

danielle: "what's THE DAY AFTER 2MORROW?"
zach: "it has tornadoes and stuff"
briana: "o i thought it was sunday."

<3 - - - - - - - - <3
time well spent. i will miss u ashley. xoxo

:: 2004 28 May :: 11.07pm
:: Mood: awake

survey. before i actually write an entry.

[x] Part 1 -- The Basics [x]
What's your name? ::: Briana
Birthplace ::: Chicago
Age ::: 16
Age you act ::: 8
Current location ::: in front of my computer
Eye color ::: hazel
Hair color ::: dirty blonde
Right, lefty or ambidextrous? ::: righty
Zodiac sign? ::: pisces
Height? ::: 5'
[x] Part 2 -- Describe... [x]
Your heritage/nationality ::: italian, & idk the rest.
Your hair ::: thin, straight, a lil' past my shoulders?
Your fears ::: death
Your perfect room ::: contains a bed, couch, and a door that will let u out to the beach
What you practically do in a day ::: sleep, eat, cheer, school.
[x] Part 3 -- What is/are... [x]
Words you overuse ::: yeah.
Phrases you overuse ::: no way.
Your first thought when you wake up ::: i don't plan on getting up.
Your greatest accomplishment ::: varsity cheer @ PVHS
Something you want to do ::: dance
[x] Part 4 -- This or that [x]
Pepsi or Coke ::: water
McDonald's or Burger Kings ::: subway
Britney Spears or Christina Aguilera ::: britney spears
Chocolate or vanilla ::: vanilla
Adidas or Nike ::: nike
Black or white ::: black & white.
Bills or Coins ((Think $$$)) ::: bills
Burgers or hot dogs ::: salads
Egypt or France ::: France. Egypt is in Africa (something i learned this year)
Rock or rap ::: both
[x] Part 5 -- Do you...[x]
Smoke ::: no
Cuss ::: yes =/
Sing well ::: sing ok.
Sing in the shower ::: definitely
Talk to yourself --a lot-- ::: not often
Believe in yourself ::: depends on what i am doing.
Like taking these longass surveys? ::: only when i'm bored.
Play an instrument ::: no
Want to go to college? ::: yes
Want to get married? ::: yes
Want to have children? ::: produced in a bedroom.
Think you're a health freak? ::: tend to be
Get along with your parents ::: for the most part
Get along with your siblings? ::: not often
Think you're popular ::: people know me, and i know them.
[x] Part 6 -- In the past month have you..[x]
Gone out of state ::: no
Drank alchohal ::: might have
Smoke ::: no
Get high ::: no
Done any drugs ::: no
Eaten an entire box of oreos ::: hell no
Been on stage ::: no
Gone skinny dipping ::: no
Been dumped ::: no. almost 8 months with Jonah <3
Dyed your hair ::: no
Stolen anything ::: no
[x] Part 7 -- Your friends! =D [x]
Craziest ::: danielle
Loudest ::: jb
Most shy ::: probably me.
Blondest ::: ally
Smartest ::: pretam
Kindest ::: ashley p & ashley c
Best personality ::: all of them
Most talented ::: christina
Best singer ::: haven't heard anyone sing
Most ghetto ::: jb
Drama Queen ((or King XP)) ::: brittany
Pain in the ass ::: no comment.
The one you just want to strangle to death ((Homer Simpson style))::: not telling
Funniest ::: adam
Best person for advice ::: anyone who's been thru the situation i'm in.
Dependable ::: anyone
Trustworthy ::: anyone except logan lol j/k
Druggie ::: britt & jb
Most likely to end up in jail ::: britt or jb... maybe neil
Person you've known the longest ::: ashley escamilla
[x] Part 8 -- The Last... [x]
Last dream ::: can't remember, its been forever
Last nightmare ::: can't remember, its been forever
Car ride ::: ashley c, zach, me, danielle, camilo
Last time you cried ::: today. last day of school @ atlantic
Last movie seen ::: mean girls
Last movie rented ::: gothika
Last book read ::: an egg on 3 sticks
Last word said ::: visit.
Last curse word said ::: shit.
Last time you laugh ::: in the car... the guys looking at danielle. damn mexicans.
Last phone call ::: ashley c
Last CD played ::: mariah carey - charmbracelet
Last song you listened to ::: something on 94.9 in ashley c's car.
Last annoyance ::: the mexicans.
Last IM ::: chance.
Last weird encounter ::: hm...
Last person you hugged ::: idk, whoever it was that felt that i bugged them.
Last person you yelled at ::: camilo for not giving me his shirt to wipe my sandy feet off.
Last time you wore a skirt ::: tonight
Last time you've been evil ::: *shrugs*
Sarcastic? ::: *shrugs*
Last time you fought with your parents ::: hm... today. with my mom. i don't want my cat to be put to sleep.
Last time you wished upon a star ::: the night i was sitting outside with mike, & patti... shooting star
Played Truth or Dare ::: long time ago.
Spent quality time alone ::: usually do.
[x] Part 9 -- I swear this is the last one! -- Randomness [x]
Are you talking to someone on AIM ::: no i have an away message on to ignore someone.
Do you feel lonely ::: yes. especially after that couple on the beach.
Ever TP'd someone's house ::: no
How about egging someone's house ::: halloween.
Do you not like dislike not like me? ::: say... what???
Ain't Eminem and 50 Cent just fine? ::: just hot.
Yo Momma ::: yo daddy.
Ever been so hungry you felt like you could eat the person next to you? ::: no, i don't like meat.
What do you think of George Bush? ::: small penis.
Any secret fetishes? ::: i like handcuffs.
Do you like to wear chains? O_o ::: no.
How many languages do you speak? ::: 2. me habla espanol pequena.
Damn.. are your fingers tired? Cause mine sure are! ::: no. typing helps ur nails grow faster.
Glad this is over? ((Say yes and I'll stalk you =P)) ::: it is?

Bored? ((Over 100 questions)) brought to you by BZOINK!

:: 2004 28 May :: 1.00pm

Basics
name: heather
age: 15
shoe size: 9
My______thinks I am....
dad: in 8th grade
mom: insane
sibling (s): annoying
best friend: gurney hatin silly person
boyfriend/girlfriend: dont have one
Favorites
band: RUSH (at the moment)
beverage: cran-grape juice
color: pale pink
article of clothing: navy american eagle pants and off the shoulder pink express shirt
subject: art
time of the day: 10 at night
TV show: don't have one...
Choose one
live forever/die young: live forever
yankees/braves: yankees
radio/TV: tv
real mail/e-mail: read mail
cell phone/home phone: cell
blind/deaf: neither
republican/democrat: democrat
pro-choice/pro-life: pro-choice
evolution/creation: evolution
Friends
best: amela
most annoying: mmm. cant say
funniest: jessica urban
prettiest: hmm..ari. def
the one you'd like to be stranded with: emily
someone you WISH could be your friend: all those drummers that graduated. OH and someone else but i don't want ya'll to know
most likely to end up in jail: jessica brandi
Random
Best/Worst
Worst/Best thing that has ever been served to you (talking about food here): worst: i don't know/ best: chinese chicken salad at cheesecake factory
worst/best year of your life: Worst: 7th grade year/ Best: this year
worst/best relationship: never had anyworst/best cd: worst: whatever one the macarena is on /best: the RUSH one we listen to in jessica's car
One word describe yourself: unique
describe your room: yellow and blue
describe your family: varied, loud and outgoing
describe your appearance: brown hair and eyes
describe your social life: fun and jewish
Personal quesitons
Do you enjoy life?: yes
Are you envious of others?: def
Do you try your best?: no
What is your personal motto?: Life's too short, if you don't atop and look around once in a while you might miss it
-Ferris Bueller
Why did the Chicken Cross the Road?: to get to the other side
When was the last time you were picked on?: probably today
...by who?: alex m
When was the last time you skipped school?: last friday and went driving with jessica
Are tomatoes fruits or vegetables?: fruits
Do you like the smell of rain?: rain smells?
If you had to sell your soul for one thing, what would it be?: a lacoste shirt and a shelby GT 500
If you had to rename your hometown, what would you call it?: i don't know
If you could choose the way you died, what would it be?: never!
if you had to choose the title of your autobiography, what would it be?: you think you know...but you have no idea. this is the life of heather
if you could commit one crime w/o being caught, what crime?: um...can't say
If you could read the mind of anyone you know, who would it be?: someone really smart during the AP exam
if you had to cancel one day of the week forever, which day would go?: monday. cause then there will never be a case of the mondays
Can you touch your toes?: yep
Last question...
Why is E.J. the most awesome person in the whole wide world?!?: who's EJ?

2 . | <3

:: 2004 27 May :: 8.40pm

i am looking forward to summer. i am gone from everyone...

iluvBITP: we have to both have something we cannot leave without
iluvBITP: like for me a lacoste, and for you....
Drift Banana: ...
Drift Banana: a mini skirt
Drift Banana: ?

alwaysfalling

:: 2004 26 May :: 8.15pm
:: Mood: happy
:: Music: rooney - stay away

school is over in 2 days? i can't believe it and i'm so happy/sad about the whole thing. happy because this is the summer i turn 16, which means i get to drive wherever i want, whenever i want and sad because this is when i have to say goodbye to ashley cline, who i will miss dearly.

so today i went to pick up my car. my dad drove it home and he was like, "this is a nice car. maybe we will trade and you can have my car." i would love if this happened. for one, my dad's car is smaller and already has a cd player in it and plus it's a stick-shift which i think would be fun to drive once i learned. the only problem at the moment is that the car is a stick-shift and i need a lot more practice in learning how to drive it. we'll see i guess. at least i have a car. that's all i care about. my 14 year-old cousin was like, "you really want that car?" and i was like, "trust me patrick, when you turn 16 you aren't going to care about what kind of car it is"... by the way... it's a 95 oldsmobile ninety-eight. i am going to pimp out in that car like a old lady should be pimping in it.

hmm... done? yeah i think thats about it.

oh yeah... yesterday was my mom's birthday... she was depressed, really depressed. it was sad, really sad.

love. <3

4 . | <3

:: 2004 26 May :: 6.07pm

It's been a while...I havn't been updating anywhere though there has been much to say. The petty details of my days are pointless and my depression is repetitive. There is just not much more to life right now.

I have this sick and twisted project that I have yet to fully commit myself to. If I do manage to become as wrapped up in it as its success will soon require It will abolosh all doubt in the suspicions that I am nothong more than evil hellspawn sent to hurt everyone and everything I touch just for the sake of furthering my own happiness. What an inane goal it is, for happiness to me is like a high that wears off all too quickly. And life is certainly not my drug of choice.

I don't care what the slogans and ad campaigns say, life has all the potency of virgin pina coladas and second hand smoke. It'll make you fat, it will kill the innocent but there is no such thing as being high on life. As odd as it sounds I believe the only people stong (or perhaps weak) enough to derive pleasure from life are the twisted souls. Those people who can corrupt the everyday to their will, who can manipulate reality and it's drones to their own benefit without remorse and force a smile on their face. If such things are beyond your effort and ability...there are other unnatural highs to be found, other ways to simulate happiness. Is it pathetic? I still don't know...maybe its life thats pathetic... But my point still remains, there is no happiness to be found in simply living...those days are long dead.

Don't even bother disagreeing, this may only be true for people like me I'm not naive...maybe there are no people like me...odds are there are millions. Everyone gets depressed everyone has a darkness though some of us wear it like armor. I don't possess the ability to supress it as some do, and I'm not quite sure that I envy them for it.

no matter what I write there is no point, it's like I have said all of the words in the world and all other speech is superfluous. It seems like all i'm facing in life is endings it's all I'm looking forward to. Waiting...for the end of the day, the week, the year, the end of friendships, the end of an era, the end of my sanity. Like I'm patiently sitting here waiting for death, and I havnt the strength to take matters into my own hands...

~Jess~

:: 2004 26 May :: 4.19pm

So it goes. - Kurt Vonnegut.
i think i've found my favorite author. need to go buy another one of his books other than Slaughter House Five.

we are all just picking our noses hoping that nobody is watching, or pooping in the bathroom stall hoping nobody will walk in and smell it. and we are all just looking for a way to find acceptance into this society that craves perfection and peace during "World War III". some of us high school students are looking to make it out alive from the rest of high school to succeed in the future, while others are just looking out the window & hope to make it out alive from their exams. but of course, why are we all looking to succeed? some are trying to overachieve others like the competition between two different species living in one niche. whatever happened to that phrase "we are all treated equally." this place would not consist of competition and attempts to bite your competitor's ear off, if we were all treated equally. but in the end... we all die, and our lives end, maybe not our souls or spirits, but the majority of us are put into a coffin and buried six feet underground. and even then, the size of our tombstones and the amount of money that your family pays (to let it sit there in an open cemetry where anyone can walk in and take a sledge hammer & smash it to tiny pieces) can determine the social status that you were once living for. "Equally".... that's a word that you just... don't put in an American dictionary. but as i was saying before, we all figure out what perspective we are going to look at life through. the one where you are going to drive somebody insane wondering about what lies ahead, or the one where you intend on complaining about what is going on at that very moment. either way you have a tendency of bothering somebody else. and in doing so, you begin to realize it and then you also realize that not everybody is going to like you and you are not going to get along with everyone else. then you are going to become afraid of being unliked, or you are just going to use profanity and announce to the world, "i really do not give a fuck of what you think of me." and that... is where it begins. where arguments take place, where war becomes a conflict and world peace is no longer going to exist. not saying that it ever has in the first place. writing this is just like giving you a historical background of jesus' death or hammurabi's statement, "an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth." because in probably the next few weeks, or even days, you may have an argument with a friend or foe, and instead of arguing about it, you might just want to find the real cause of the problem and stop. because after all, you want world peace too, right? i don't think your family members, or neighbors, or just soldiers are too happy when they are standing against a target with their hands raised above their head and their feet digging in the sand of Iraq, awaiting their merciful death. and i, among others, won't be too pleased if you find that amusing. i did not envision so.
------ yours truly, Briana K. Evenson
Daughter of Mr. & Mrs. Thomas Evenson Sr.

ur hiding something cause it's burning thru ur eyes.
i try to get it out
but all i hear from u are lies
And I can tell you�re going through the motions
I figured you were acting out your part
Once again, we�re playing off emotion
Which one of us will burn until the end?

Catalyst, you insist to pull me down
You contradict the fact that you still want me around
And it�s all downhill from here
And it�s all downhill from here

Your good intentions slowly turn to bitterness
Reoccurring episodes with each and every kiss
-New Found Glory = ALL DOWNHiLL FROM HERE

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ANAND!

spinoangel

:: 2004 26 May :: 5.38pm
:: Mood: content
:: Music: the jealous sound - recovery room

i need the recovery room
sigh. days are a lot different when you get the right amount of sleep. all school days should be like this, dont you think? today i took english and art exams. they were alright. tomorrow is spanish and precal. should study. but havent started. procrastinating majorly. oh well. <3 hmmm. i feel like i need to do a project right now. i have the perfect one in mind. but anyways.... yeah i'm happy. not THAT excited about summer, but its definitely a step up from school. however my parents are very... frustrating sometimes. they won't let me have a car.... wont let me even drive alone... so whats the point of having my license? there really is none. stupid stupid. so i have to have a babysitter wherever i go or be taken by someone else. isnt that great? ugh. they trust other kids to drive me alone but they dont trust me to drive alone? and insurance costs too much. understandable reasons i guess. im still pissed though. will i end up being the only one who can't drive? grrrrrrrrrr. sigh. anyways. yeah. cant wait for it all the be over.

i love this song so much, i'm almost angry/regretful that i'm not angry and depressed.

she stood there in her summer dress
wind caught her hair and failed to confess
i smiled as we raced through the night
my hand caught her wings then nothing felt right

i know that i left you for dead
don't give up so soon
because you know that we all have a bed
it's waiting for you in the recovery room

just forget everything that i said
washed out the wounds, walls painted red
waiting for you in the recovery room

5 . | <3

:: 2004 25 May :: 10.20pm
:: Mood: aggravated
:: Music: watching Real World

missing my boyfriend. iwescream. <3
school = boring.
spanish exam = totally unfair. whatever.
tomorrow = no exams, period 2 & 5. already took stats & english. done. w00t.
got my course selection for park vista... which reminds me. i have something online to look up. anyways.

cheer gym = "if u can do that again, i'll give u a free t-shirt" damn. i could have gotten it, if i counted right the first time. i wanna cheerformance shirt!

1.5 days 'til summer is here. haha. i want to live on the beach. s0o happening. monday-sunday. and alllllll over again.

wanna make a cd. no time. too lazy.

i miss jonah.

real world = franky is going insane =/

i feel like putting something emotional and make a point in this journal today... but i can't seem to do s0o. s0o, with that, i'm out. xoxo

HAPPY BIRTHDAY LUAN!

1 . | <3

:: 2004 25 May :: 7.31pm

have you ever seen this side of mr. perel?
Shortystuff822: i am def sorry for starting shit with u the other day, i didnt mean to piss u off in the way it did, dont hold a grudge because i am truly trying to be a guinine friend to u lol belive it or not, and i duno what if ne thing can i do to get u to talk to me or not be mad at me....im trying to be a good person for once lol

3 . | <3

:: 2004 24 May :: 9.59pm
:: Mood: bouncy

i wanted to make my mix for 2morrow's classes... but i realized briana doesn't have anymore blank CD's. o well.

s0o many more people read this than i thought. people that don't even know what woohu is. cool cool.

daddy is yelling for me 2 take cough medicine. i refuse. lol.

practice for ATLANTiC tomorrow... i have no ride. shit.

chem - talked. thought about jonah.

stats - i don't remember what i did. i know watched avi & anand play chess... and listened to avi's music... and talk to pretam, avi & anand, but i don't... o yeah i do. i looked at every single page in the yearbook. thought about jonah.

econ - slept & read my book. yes... i read. thought about jonah.

art hist - need to find something to do for my project. its due on friday. thought about jonah.

time to watch the inferno.

----> i love jonah. xoxo
think i thought about him lots today.
if u put a sprite on the top of ur monitor and leave it there for like 2 hours, it gets warm.

boricuababy

:: 2004 24 May :: 8.46pm
:: Mood: hungry
:: Music: lemme ride dat donkey donkey

-amara this is our songgggggg!!!!!!!!!
grrr..exams start tomoro..not good..i have my chem exam tomoro..i shudd be studying..but no i rather sit here and talk to my sammi, my meli, and my amycita!! PROCRASTINATING IS ALWAYS FUN!!..lol..well guyz amyz re-named me..so my new name according to amy is kailottery..lmao..yupp yupp..thanx gurl..lol

meli: im glad ur eye stopped twitching!!..lol..and i hope ur throat feels betterrrrr

1 . | <3

:: 2004 24 May :: 5.34pm
:: Mood: blah
:: Music: tempting to touch

GUESS WHOS COMING BACK!?
...thats right- me. i pulled it off. oh yeah.

im gonna start from saturday. i DID manage to finally go out. i went to see troy with carlos n his family. lol. theyre such a cute family. came home around 1 in the morning. and the dog ran out of the house- yeah made a fool of myself chasing him. heh. oh well. then just chilled on sunday. now for today:

spanish- got our tests back..got a B..
math- got our tests back..got a B..so i have a C in the class :)
chem- she can kiss my ass.. a 69.20..wont give me the fucking C. anyways we did group work the whole time- so we did whatever.
lunch- me n amara managed to eat a chicken patty. haha. why didnt we think of ice cream??
art history- finished my project. i like it. and everyones came out really good too. tried to take damn pictres..but noooo. heh. carlos presented..did a good job.
bus- talked for a little bit to amy. then we all fell asleep..well i dont know if amy did. but u get what i mean.

now i gotta write a spanish poem and study for health. yes i need to study lol.

1 . | <3

:: 2004 23 May :: 9.23pm
:: Mood: cold

Bad Night...
I feel like pushing extremes...like giving up

I wanna drink myself unconcious
scream myself hoarse
bleed myself dead
I wanna let myself go
run away from life
and responsibility
and all of my prospects
because in reality they are bleak
my efforts are all doomed to be fruitless
and once I have lost it all in the end
there will be no one by my side
no one who cares enough to make the pain go away
I'm tired
tired of waiting for that one guy
to get his shit together
for any guy to get his shit together
to get my own shit together
I want to lose myself in this escapists reality
hold the first person I see
just for blind comfort
I left my standards behind long ago
I want to saturate my system
in all means of synthetic euphoria
nothing is real anyway
so fuck reality
I'll just drift until I hit the sun...

:: 2004 23 May :: 12.39am
:: Mood: blah

sleep til' 2pm. get a call from a friend. her car has been keyed. stupid american assholes with mutilated minds. s0o stupid. stayed in bed til' 5pm. britt called. went in the car with him. demanded him to take me home. sorry ur not getting me high or drunk, nor am i giving u sex. i'm a girl with a boyfriend and morals.

saw patti & jb. miss patti. xoxo. fought with my dad. headed to the clubhouse to see danielle, ashley & christina. <3 hung at danielle's house. then picked up camilo & went bowling. o how i loved. funny camilo. funny dancing. good times. next weekend? best for last? sounds perfect.

went back to danielle's house. was there til about 12 a.m. not bad. people making out in her lawn. +sigh+ where's my boyfriend and my high school year going? but i met some of her cool family members lol. <3

home. talking to jonah. don't want to work tomorrow. nor do i know WHEN i work. that's going to work against my advantage 2morrow morning. o well. off to getting ready for bed i go. xoxo. holler.

4 . | <3

:: 2004 22 May :: 4.27pm

feels like sunday...
new layout...it's a tad emo please don't hurt me danielle. lol I still might change it but this works for now.

congrats to all my seniors for making it through 4 years of this crap...I envy you so much

must study must study do not let me procrastinate....

I dont think anyone really pays much attention to woohu anymore so I'm comfortable posting more of my writing and shit...here goes

*Call Me Dementia*

call me dementia
wings of maddness tightly furled
soaring towards the white hot angels in the depths of other worlds

see me dementia
eyes unblinking in the light
harness the holy sacreligious in the irises of night

feel me dementia
it's emitting from my skin
when your hands do cease their burning will you bear my touch again

forever Demented
irreversibly insane
I'll burn myself to ashes as I relish in my pain

love me Dementia
and you'll see these wings unfurl
wrap you deep within my maddness and I'll drag you from this world

fear my Dementia...

~much love~
Jess

1 . | <3

:: 2004 22 May :: 2.15pm
:: Mood: full
:: Music: game over

IM DETERMINED TO GET OUT OF THIS HOUSE...
yesterday was a good day..dont really feel like typing about it. i did relays. yeah- def. got very red. i got an A in english and on the exam. score. and epstein can kiss my ass. bus ride was fun though. then i ended up staying in last night. again. watched 'bones'- creepy but yet so0 fake. then some other tv. got off the couch around 3:00 am. then today i went to lunch at Mario's. yummy food. now im gonna call some people up to see if they wanna hang out. i will not stay home!

short and simple. lol

:: 2004 22 May :: 12.52am
:: Mood: grateful
:: Music: YOURS // Mariah Carey

Results 0f a great day // night.
chem - free day. w00t. worked on stupid bio hw tho.

spanish - adam = handcuffed as a joke & jb pushed him to the floor. 00ps. did more bio hw.

lunch - 0ok a black kid sat in jb's seat. the avi & i told the kid not to move. s0o jb, frustrated, grabbed another chair and pulled it up by avi. turns out it was another black kid's chair & he wanted it back. s0o jb got his seat back & i told the kid as a joke, "beat the shit outta him" and the kid goes, "he already looks like shit" and continues doing his cafeteria duty. then he sneaks up behind jb and puts jb's trash on his head. funny i thought. but that kid woulda kicked jb's ass. s0o jb hadda let it go.

english - did more bio hw.

biology - got the answers to the test right before class from some freshmen friends. =) took the test. then, me & elise started makin' the boingy noise with paper. then she resulted in the noise with her pencil. lol it was a lil' band. and then... jamaal started throwin' jokes at me... s0o i hadda get him back. hater. lol <3 we had fun. kayli L L . hehe

bus - looked at the santaluces yearbook.

went to danielle's instead of home. ashley c came over. danielle cut her hair. lmao. it was amazing. it turned out great. came home. changed. went to city place.

free food, courtesy of adam. ashley p, ashley c, camillo, adam, christina, danielle, zach & i all had free dinner. then it was off to Macy's where camillo & i met a drug dealer. he didn't look like a drug dealer, but he definitely put it out there that he was. with his gray - haired self & asian girlfriend. we walked around, enjoyed the view. then left. went to John I Leonard. on our way... we met some interesting people. the old man that blew a kiss at ashley. and the younger guys that were in their backseats staring at us, then when camillo waved.... the waved & stopped staring lol. saw Michael Tampas walking, and then, watched 1 band play. they sucked. camillo & his comments. and his gay habits lol. then zach's band came on. good stuff. definitely c danielle & ashley gettin' with some of those guys =) after the police pulled the plug, we left. drove camillo home. "he doesn't talk a lot, he just has a lot to say..." - Briana. stupid blonde. o0ps. then, finally, i got home... now i am here. called jonah, but his dad picked up, s0o i hung up immediately. now, i'm talking to santos & danielle. s0rta sleepy i guess, but i enjoyed my night with them. perhaps we shall not make it the last <3 ashley, come and visit. thank god i'm going to school with camillo. i will definitely make that kid talk, he is just too funny. none the less, he is supposed to call me... 5:30am to wake us up for makin' him stay out late. let's just see if he remembers. did i mention i love ashley's hair? =X sry can't keep it secret. too damn cute. x0x0 ttyl i'm out for bed <3

:: 2004 22 May :: 12.39am
:: Mood: *sigh*

wow...just got home from seeing Troy...and can I just say if you havn't seen it yet please do so....the plot is great the love stories were sad and romantic the men were HOT!!! And I have to be a big loser and say it made me appreciate Homer and the Illiad a lot more. Mr. McManus' voice was comming back to me (which is never a good thing im pretty sure) the whole time and I remembered all of our class discussions, I feel like I should be writing an essay right now on how Achilles is a tragic character. Ok and I don't even need to say it but....Brad Pitt NAKED always naked (when he wasnt in a skirt or a sarong that is but we will overlook that) jesus christ him and Jennifer Aniston must just walk around naked all day because...really why bother....he's just beyond sexy along with most other men in the movie. sheesh...I felt so sad and alone NOT a good movie to see if you are single and depressed...I would kill for someone to hold me like that or be willing to die for me.

ok so yeah enough of that, had a fun night we had an officer meeting afterschool then lauren came over for a few hrs then we went to meet Michelle and Richelle at the movies (hillary was being a big loser and went home to sleep). I missed them even as they were sitting right next to me...we have Michelle for most of the summer but Richelle is leaving for UF way too soon. some highlights...

*Shrek hates Lauren
*Richelle:"Why does everyone refer to me as amusement instead of a person?"
*Richelle:"oh my god look at that girls profile she looks like the female jimmy neutron."
Michelle: "oh my god I know her...hey that's my friend!"
*creepy old man
*I love Helen!
*maybe if the walls are so damn special they should stand inside of them...
*But I wanna fight the troojanssss
*It is too early in the day for killing princes...
*how long until lauren crys...any takers?
*obnoxious kid: "finally it's over my fricken ass hurts"
Lauren: "then maybe you shoulda taken ur fricken ass out of the goddamn movie!"
*Richelle spending about 4 years buying tickets...promise we'll take you to see shrek eventually

lol I needed a night of stupid normalcy with the lauren and the -ichelles ...good luck graduating tomorrow you guys....don't trip now.

~have a nice weekend~
Jess

ps. 5 fuckin days!!!

:: 2004 21 May :: 12.11am
:: Mood: relaxed
:: Music: aint no mountain high enough

REAL EYES REALIZE REAL LIES.
hey all. whats up? nada aqui. today was boring, very stressful. spanish- translations test..alright. math- test. F.AI.L.E.D. chemistry- test. F.AI.L.E.D. art history- worked on the project. i like it. its fun. bus- talked to amy the whole way home. <3. took a nap. IM GOING ON A CRUISE AND THEN I HAVE A HOUSE ON THE BEACH!!!! im soooo excited. now im talking to ashley..hehe. my buddy. gotta go rest up with my candles lol.

<3

1 . | <3

:: 2004 20 May :: 11.31pm
:: Mood: frustrated
:: Music: Boy // Mariah Carey

but secretly ur the only thing that lifts me up & makes me smile.
break time from bio hw.

chem test - i think i did good. i knew what i was doing for the most part.

stats - spoons. pimps = mike, stu & pj. <3 i'mma miss 'em. n everyone else.

econ - dispise this class. i only see mr. epstein 2 more times & i am done! hell yeah.

art hist - it was good. but i don't know if i'mma find something else to do for my project. i'm not liking the outcome.... damn i hate being a perfectionist.

slept on the bus - its been s0o boring lately. why? idk. i need some spice tho.

home - bio work. procrastination. phone with jonah, dinner. thinking. talking. sitting at carol's. yeah. got a cute outfit to wear tomorrow. hopefully... all goes as planned. x0x0

anyways... back to hw.

enjoy ur last few school days. then its all summer love & fun in the sun.

:: 2004 20 May :: 9.52pm

i need a break
just watching wonder boys, talking to some people online.

i find it weird i am just starting to become friends, or better friends with people so late in the year...

i have confirmation this weekend, skipping school tomorrow to have mental health day, seems nice doesn't it?

ooh summer.

spinoangel

:: 2004 20 May :: 4.27pm
:: Music: matt nathanson - "sad songs"

i love NOT having homework. it's such a new experience. sigh. today in spanish i told branden, this freshman who sits in front of me, how his life is going to change next year. he wasn't as restless as he usually is, and he said he felt weird so i told him that he's growing up. and i told him to be ready for a sophomore year full of being tired and depressed. i think it's just a rite of passage for us PIBs. then he said ok next year tell me how being a junior is. and i said, ok if i have the time. i think we might all just become so immune to depression because we'll be so busy doing things. fun, right? yeah.

the future holds so much in store. this weekend is ashley's weekend and my guitar recital. then next weekend i'm leaving to go to houston rafter school. i will be so cleansed in houston. seeing my aunts, my cousins, experiencing the idea of NOT worrying and stressing out. like i can just sit on the plane and listen to music. and no homework to do. i just can't imagine how happy i will be to get away, even for just a weekend. i will miss people. but i need it.

mmm.. i think i like this guy's music. im not exactly sure yet.

i'm waiting up for you to rescue me to come around and cover everything.
relying on my best memories. to breathe for me, breath for me...
so much better than all this, all of this.
tired of singing all the sad songs in my head.
but i can't find enough of anything to drown out what you said.

and i can still smell summer in your skin.
and i can still remember giving in.
wrapped all up in your hips and in your sheets.
it felt great, falling, falling...

i feel so faded, so far gone. nothing surprises me anymore...

and sometimes i find i catch myself letting you back in.

:: 2004 19 May :: 6.06pm
:: Mood: chipper
:: Music: o0o0o0o

small? slut? yeah!
good day & i am definitely looking forward to tomorrow - art history. such peace.

chem - took our test. well the 1st half. i think i did alright. studied before class. and i was pretty sure of my answers. s0o its good. now i just have to study # 4,5,6 on the review sheet! SUPPOSIVELY they are SUPER similar.... hint to people.

spanish - handcuffs lol. dressing justin up in the bathing suit.... sexy. but yeah.. those handcuffs man... "look at the lil' slut!" - jb. "u looked very experienced putting those on justin...." - britt.

lunch - .... boring.
anand: "i'm so happy i only have to come for like 3 more days."
avi: "but then u gotta come back for 2 more years."

english - took our exam early. i definitely didn't finish. i definitely just wanna fail it and be done. 90/100 on the poetry analysis essay. woot.

biology - mr. hawk was there. he's cool. gave us study time. took our "quest". idk how i did, but i studied. i think i did well... i guess.

afterschool - picked up that good ol' cookie dough. they were s0o weak. not many of those girls could lift those boxes. w/e got in & outta there.

park vista - tried on a wholeeeee bunch of shit. bloomers, warmups, rain jackets, bodyliners, racer tanks, v neck tanks, shoes, socks, shorts, skort, lined skort, uniforms. michelle & i talked about the whole c00kie // james situation. yeah. i feel horrible 4 michelle. then chelsea definitely has an infected finger, yucky stitches. this lauren chick = slut? perhaps. angie = sweet, me & her are pretty much the same. mikey.... hadda leave the room cause he's a guy & we all hadda try on a buncha clothes. michelle & karen... GET THAT DAD OUTTA HERE! HELLLLLLLO! lol. good stuff. that uniform smelt like B.O. lol. 5-13 WOOT! 9-12, ta a 5-13. niiiice i like. SUPER cute uniforms. <3

anyways... i'm out. gonna watch this white girl on MTV be made inta a hip hop dancer. lol...

HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY ELLEN!

1 . | <3

:: 2004 18 May :: 11.17pm
:: Mood: driven
:: Music: through the rain // mariah carey

lemme take a breath & update.
school!
chem - don't ask for help unless its from a teacher. nobody is willing to help. it's IB. realize that these kids are all for themselves. nothing more. remember the days when we talked on the phone going over homework?

stats - played uno. went outside the class.. walked around campus. watched over the edge of the 2nd floor & just... thought... s0o0o many things.

economics - epstein woke me up... but i WAS paying attention. whatever. did some bio hw.

lunch - went to landaker's office. got my exit papers from IB. easy as one 2 three. goodbye atlantic. dunno whether to be happy or sad. thank god i missed most of lunch tho... because when i returned... adam was spitting on a napkin to create shapes of the continents... disgusting. i don't even want to know what else happened.

art hist - now that is a class. phew. i was more into watching everyone else work, than doing my own thing. i was eager to go and watch christina paint. but u know that an artist needs her privacy & peace, plus i think she would have thought i was strange.... s0o i watched everyone else. ari. sunil. carlos. sameen. sam. kaila. s0o interesting. then i helped anand.

bus - slept. torn. =/

home - got home, went to cheer gym in boca. woot. nice. work out with jumps.

ate dinner... and studied like shit. yuck i hate it. +sigh+ idk i don't care anymore. honestly.

pyce. shower & more studying. bedtime = i think.... not.

:: 2004 18 May :: 5.31pm
:: Mood: tired
:: Music: welcome back (?)

WAS IT PICK ON SAM DAY??

having no lockers suck! i have way too much to carry..

spanish- got a key club certificate lol.
math- copied chemistry worksheets..looked through magazines
chemistry- took a quiz. failed. did group work. ms. kenyon = bitch. went delirious.
lunch- nothing new
art histroy- worked on our projects. had fun actually. although everyone was picking on me. lol
bus- talked to amy most of the time.
home- ate wendys. yum.

note to self: do homework! ha

:: 2004 17 May :: 7.57pm
:: Mood: good
:: Music: freek-a-leak

HOW YA LIKE IT DADDY??

weekend wrap up: NADA..maybe this weekend people will be able to go out?

today was good. very much appreciated.
- joe was on the bus :/
-carlos cut off his fro!!

* spanish_ didnt do much. my rachel was absent...
-walked behind amara and kaila without them knowing..funny funny.

* health_ wow. some people just shouldnt speak. HA. we reviewed and i caught up on work. girl dropped a book on my foot..oww. we're going to the track next class :(
-met up with everyone..talked..walked my buddy to class

* lunch_ boring..studied vocab. talked to amanda.

* english_ morone wasnt in the best mood. took the vocab quiz. but the hawthorn thing was interesting. then we just chit chatted.
-holy crap..you guys were HYPER!!

* economics_ talked to kaila and amanda. slept for a bit. did other homework. i guess you could say borinnggg..:/

* bus ride_ fun..talked to my girlies. no joe! whoo.

* home_ nada...watched tv..ate..the usual routine.

well im gonna try and do some tarea..ttyl