amazighstarrynights
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2005 10 January :: 1.49pm
:: Mood: bouncy
Entry 1 - but not the last
So I finally signed up for this thing after consistent prodding from someone *winks not mentioning names......* I promised that I would write more than one time and then stop - my resolution for the New Year, be persistent. I just came home a day (and a half?) ago from Morocco. So now that my house is back in order and I have a little time before I run about, I have begun my first entry. I've been sitting around the last few days in a haze, thinking about my trip, remembering things and as always having withdrawls, wanting to be back. It was interesting because of how apprehensive I became before I left, thinking about being in a Muslim country - how we would be treated and such. But now I am longing to be back. Life was so much slower, people so much warmer, life was just to be lived and that is what people did. It could not have been more welcoming. I thought it was really interesting that people on the street randomly would call me Fatima, and it sort of confused me so I did some googling when I came home. I knew that they sold charms of the Hand of Fatima and that it was meant to give protection (so I bought one because it's really pretty). So this is what I got from my research:
The Hand of Fatima ( Fatma - daughter of Prophet Mohammed )
Throughout northern Africa, Turkey, and in other parts of the Middle East, Muslims wear the necklace and , "Hand of Fatima" , as a jewellery and also for superstitious protection. Fatima was the daughter of the Prophet Muhammad who married Ali, the nephew of the Prophet. From their descendants Shi'a Muslims claim a direct line of authority over Muslims. Miracles were attributed to Fatima, such as when she prayed in the desert, it started raining. She is described as a faithful, holy woman.
Its romantic story is as follows: One day Lady Fatima (daughter of the Holy Prophet Mohammed) was cooking helva ( halvah ) (the texture is like a dry oath meal , with sugar and butter in it . They use semalina as the main ingredient . ) in a pan in the garden when suddenly the door opened and her husband the caliph Ali entered along with the new bride. ( Islam allowed four times marriage to man ) concubine (slave-girl), she was deeply grieved and u the wooden stirring spoon in confusion dropped from her hand and unaware , she continued stirring the halvah with her hand. Because of the grief in her heart she never even felt the pain of her hand mixing the hot halvah. However, when her husband hurried to her side and exclaimed in surprise "What are you doing there, Fatima?" she felt her hand burning and the pain. Thus it is from that day on the hand of the Lady Fatima has been used in the Islamic world as a symbol of patience, abundance, and faithfulness, and thus it is that girls and women wearing this necklace from whose end the hands hang believe the hands of Lady Fatima will bring them good luck, abundance and patience."
The story continues ; the bride and Ali as the groom go into their wedding room . The house is wooden , and Fatima can not stop herself from looking through a tiny little hole of a room from the second floor. And when Ali leans over the bride ,from that tiny hole , Fatima's tear drops to his shoulder , which stops him.
So , the necklace of Fatima ,rather popular in Islamic countries is formed of peaces shaped after a teae drop. The Ethnographical Museums of Turkey havr fine examples . Fatima was the daughter of the prophet Mohammed, but in fact this hand has been around before Islam, and there is still much right hand-left hand magic in Morocco. The left hand is for doing bad things; it also protects against the evil eye if you put it palm up in front of you (so naturally that's an insulting thing to do to someone, implying they have the evil eye).
Well now that I know it was a good thing I feel better and more educated. I leave with my thoughts that I found in a song:
"The air was heavy and sweet, you and I on a crowded street. There was musiceverywhere, I can see us there. In a happy little foreign town with the stars hung upside down. Half a world away, far, far away. I remember, you were laughing, we were so in love, we were so in love. The band played songs we had never heard but we danced anyway. We never understood the words we just sang. And we danced anyway."
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moana
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2005 10 January :: 11.26am
You're Chino! You are the ultra talented lead
singer of the Deftones. You write and deliver
some incredible lyrics, and always with that
extra oomph of sex appeal. Surprisingly, for
such a hard band, you really like softies like
Weezer (and actually stated that if asked to
join you would) showing the many sides of your
personality. I worship you!
Which Deftones member are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
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moana
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2005 7 January :: 10.51am
:: Mood: *sigh* ready
:: Music: interpol - evil
this is not goodbye
I've been happier lately. This vacation was just what I needed: time. I needed the time to party, I needed the time to jump around my room to The Strokes or Morrissey or Interpol or Mindless Self Indulgence, I needed the time to sit down with my brother and play Naruto until we both had tears rolling down our faces from concentrating on the tv screen for too long, I needed the time to sit down with him and watch disgusting comedy after another, I needed the time to sit down with my mother and figure things out, I needed the time to draw, sing, dance, write and most of all, I needed the time to spend with my friends.
If someone comes here and tries to tell me time is just a manmade concept and shouldn't affect us, fuck you. Don't you dare. No matter what there will always be twenty-four hours in a day, always be seven days in a week, time goes on, it's a real dimension and it marches through the three dimensions we inhabit, whether we like it or not. The only manmade concept here is the clock, the ability to track time and see how much of it we have left to get done what we have to get done.
That's a tangent.
I enjoyed this vacation so much. It meant a lot to me, in several ways and through several aspects, and though there were rough times (Laurence knows what I'm talking about) and I'm a little big caught up right now, I wouldn't change a thing about this vacation if i went back and did it again. If i could change it though, I'd put more hours into the day, more days into the week, more time to just... you know?
I'm going to miss it all when this vacation's over. I'm going to miss having the time to talk, having the time to relax, having the time to create. I'm going to miss you specifically, my personal gorgeous.
So i might be really absent. And if I am, well, don't change in the time it takes me to get back.
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WhitePony
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2005 6 January :: 3.46pm
:: Music: Underoath - The Impact of Reason
I was at work today, doing my own thing, making copies or something equally exciting while listening to Katie's and Tiffany's conversation. Tiffany's four year old son goes to preschool at a private school and Katie was asking questions about it; how much it cost and whatnot. Then she proceeded with questions/comments that weren't very clear, about if you pay for the schooling there are most likely to be kids who's parents really care about them or something. The way she was wording it was odd, like she was beating around the bush about something. Then she finally said "what I'm trying to get at is, there aren't like toothless dirty mexican kids there right?"
I wish I weren't so soft spoken and polite. I wish I didn't hold my tongue in certain situations. That kind of shit pisses me off SOO much. I wish I could've said something to her. She's not blatantly racist or anything. She doesn't use the slang words in reference to anyone, but still. I HATE hearing stuff like that. She could've made her point just as clearly by saying "toothless dirty kids" why she had to throw in "mexican" is beyond me. Every race has poverty problems, not just minorities. You want to know how to get me heated or piss me off? There's your answer.
Let me know when we evolve
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moana
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2005 5 January :: 1.13pm
:: Mood: content to wait
this isn't all about science.
i want to talk about the first four dimensions: level, depth, width and time. the first three dimensions are about space, about distance and how far apart we are. the fourth dimension is about time, maybe not exactly as we know it, but very similar to it, about how long we have to wait and how long we have to interact.
the first dimention, width, is what allows us to go back and forth. remember, we aren't talking about time, but take a step forward, then a step backwards, and you are nagivating the first dimention: width. walk in a straight line, and you're walking a whole dimension.
the second dimention is levels. if you're going up a flight of stairs, you're moving in the first and second dimensions. climbing a perfectly vertical ladder, you are navigating only the second dimension.
the third dimension is a little more complicated. if you were going up the stairs in a diagnoal line, you'd be navigating all three dimensions. if you were to go up a flight of stairs sideways, that's just the second dimension and the third dimention. if you're walking a diagonal line, that's the first and third dimensions. if you're sidestepping, that's only the third.
then the fourth dimention. you can't really move through it. you can't go up a flight of stairs and change time. there's no where you can go to make time that's been lost. once time is gone, it's gone. and if time is on its way to you you can't just step away and have it pass right over you. time is... weird. you can't go to it, you have to wait for it to come.
isn't that what we're all doing? waiting for another time? a time maybe when things are different or better or just a time when you're not alone. a lot of people like company, and not just the miserable people. but time can't be navigated independently. can it? i don't know. i just wonder, who knows where we'll be in the first three dimnsions in time?
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WhitePony
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2005 3 January :: 6.42pm
:: Music: Smashing Pumpkins - Bodies
Random Moments on Random Days
So yeah, as some of you know I've finally achieved audio capabilities. Not through speakers, but instead I have headphones hooked up to the back of my computer, which means the cord isn't very long and the tower sits on the ground so the head phones dont reach my seat, so I have to scrunch up into uncomfortable positions to wear them. When I listen to all the little goodies you people send me I must do that, but if I want to listen to my beloved and dearly missed MP3's I just have the volume up and the headphones sitting on the desk and it works fine. So a certain song came on.
With that said, I thought I'd share a silly Smashing Pumpkins anecdote with all you fans out there. I'm sure some of you have heard this before, but what the hell.
So this is back when Mellon Collie came out so back in 1995.. what was I around 12ish? Anyways, so my brother had the cd and I was listening to it in my room while doing homework or something. The song "Bodies" comes on, and you know how it starts out abrupt and scratchy, well I thought my cd player was messing up his cd and I jumped up and freaked out. Then realized, "oh wait, thats how its supposed to go" Stupid little 12 year old Joe.
On a side note, while I was in mid composition of this entry I took a brief interlude to eat. While I was eating some girl called out of the blue, who normally doesn't call. So I was talking to my mom about how random it was and she says..
Aveva: "Well you know what they say..."
Joe: "What?"
Aveva: "What?"
Joe: "What do they say?"
Aveva: "OH! I dunno. I figured you knew"
Joe: *laughs* "What the hell!? You're nuts!"
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WhitePony
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2005 2 January :: 5.50pm
:: Music: Saves The Day - My Sweet Fracture
If you didn't read my last journal entry, don't read this one. So that philosophy paper that Kyle had asked me to do. The one I stressed over. The one I knew nothing about. The one I worried about because the required 5 papers fell short half a page. The one I had written despite never taking the class. Well the day Kyle took the final, the class turned in their essays and the teacher gave them thirty minutes to study. During study time the prof stopped the class, and announced that she had just read an outstanding, model paper, an A+ paper. That obviously this person had spent a lot of time and researched a lot on this paper (keep in mind it only took one day) and I guess she actually talked to him about it after class and whatnot. I was so relieved, I was worried I was going to be his downfall. Worried that he had counted on me and I let him down. It felt so good when he told me that. But on the other hand my head got really big... but who's wouldn't? I guess I can't take that class next semester.
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moana
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2005 2 January :: 7.17pm
:: Music: deftones - deathblow
salad fingers
for andy.
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moana
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2005 2 January :: 11.36am
:: Music: the strokes - soma
2005
Happy New Year, everybody.
my mom came back home last night and gave me my birthday present early: a digital camera. 3.2 megapixels, 4x digital zoom, video capabilities with complete audio (poor audio, but still). expect better pictures to come with my posts from now on.
i hope you all had a raving good new year's, i sure as hell did.
woo woo!
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moana
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2004 30 December :: 12.38am
:: Music: The Strokes - Take It or Leave It
ToTo-ology 102
Faygo is a highly toxic liquid that is fatal to the ToTo. If a ToTo imbibes said substance, its hoo-hoo will wither and die.
This is definitely fatal to a ToTo.
In case the punis gets tired or broken from overuse, a ToTo has multiple sexual organs. A ToTo is a multi-hoohooed subspecies, like an alien!
A ToTo is very sensitive to touch, but not to beating. You are much more likely to raise a ToTo's angry response by touching its hair than you are by slapping its ass. Hair-touching is a very sensual experience to a ToTo and shall not under any circumstances be undermined, elsewise a ToTo is known to scratch, bite, punch and kick in the balls. Though usually docile, adorable creatures, ToTos have been known to attack dogs. ToTos dislike dogs. ToTos dislike dogs very very much.
In a recent experiment, the ToTo has had DingDongs infiltrated into its diet. This has caused the ToTo great confusion and delight as it satisfies sweet taste buds and inflicts childish laughter at the hoo-hoo type nature of the name of this product.
The ToTo is notable for inventing more terms and phrases for sexual encounters than should be legally possible. Most prominent are hoo-hah and wiki-wiki.
[No image available at this time.]
Much like the comic book heroes of old, the ToTo has a singular weakness that renders it incapable of eating OR hoo-hahing. This is the common household product that in layman speak is referred to as 'cheese'.
In conclusion, be careful of where you touch a ToTo and what you give it to eat and drink. To win a ToTo's favour, it is advisable to give your ToTo froghurt, Pepsi (not Coca Cola) or choclate custard. A ToTo will also take doughnuts from nice Catholic boys.
This is a ToTo, this is me. Take it or leave it. If you take it, take it all and if you leave it...
Save a ToTo. Screw abstinence.
Save a ToTo. Go on a diet.
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moana
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2004 27 December :: 11.37pm
:: Mood: exhausted
:: Music: morrissey - you are the quarry (album) thank you laurence, this one's my favourite
one of those days
here's a really sad day.
for the first time in a long time, i did NOT wake up at 4 this morning just to desperately try to get back to sleep only to finally fall asleep an hour at least later. i slept right through it all and woke up at five to my cat, licking my eyelids in protest, as if saying "hey, we've got a ritual here, you wake up at 4 and you're so bored and tired you brush me for half an hour, then feed me and clean my water. you can't sleep. wake up and carry on with our ritual." black bastard.
at 7 in the morning, i woke up to the sound of my mother, yelling over the phone, "i will not inform you or anyone else! if i feel like going to lebanon for new year's i damn well will!" she's going to lebanon for new year's. i think it's lebanon at least, she didn't say when i asked. but yeah, basically, i'm getting kicked out of the house on wednesday because that's when she's leaving.
at 10 in the morning, my brother woke me up. "fayoor, why aren't you in school?"
"it's right between christmas and new year's, why do you think i'm not school?"
"oh. go back to sleep, sis."
by then i couldn't go back to sleep, and so i got up and started working on lunch for the family. the phone rings and rings, but i don't answer, i never answer the house phone (ask andy). finally, it bugs me so much i pick up. it's my uncle waleed. his daughter diana is in the hospital again. she's got a fever of 40, blood PH 8.6, she literally cried herself unconscious.
noon, my boss calls and needs me in for an emergency. i tell her i'll be there as soon as i can. i'm already thinking, "emergency my ass".
at one, my mom is back home from work, i tell her about my boss and uncle waleed, and we decide we should probably go visit diana in the hospital. we have a brief lunch, i get dressed, and she drops me off at work while she gets some stuff from sultan (giant supermarket type place).
i get to work, and the big emergency is with contracts that i had printed out about two weeks ago. i show her that they were on her illiterate, good for nothing secretary's desk the whole time and sit down to type out a speech that i'd put off the last time i was there until my mother was done shopping and came to pick me up.
my mother absolutely has to go to the salon to get her eyebrows done, and i figure, what the hell, i could go for that too. so we do, and the women botches up my left eyebrow. great.
we're finally ready to go to the hospital, but first, let's stop by aunty badriya's and make sure she doesn't want to come along. guess what, she does want to come alone. so i jump into the backseat and try to get some sleep except my mom's playing a sermon by a saudi arabian bedouin really loudly.
we're at the hospital. diana's eyelids are literally purple and her lips and scarily blue because she hasn't stopped crying in hours. her mother, aunty alexandra, has also been crying, because the doctors don't know waht to do with her daughter. "she needs sodium bicarbonate!" she cries, "why can't they just give her the sodium bicarbonate?!"
when we drove my aunt badriya back to her house, my mother again just had to step inside for a minute to see 7asoon, my baby cousin. i spent 3 hours trying to be civil around fa6ma, the oldest cousin in that particular household, while she watched kuwaiti soccer games and flipped through the arabic music channels. i tried to fall asleep, but i couldn't.
we finally left and stopped by a bakery where my mom spends half an hour making a purchase. they didn't even have a doughnut i could munch on while i waited.
we left the bakery and just as we neared my house my mom pulls into city centre, the ghetto mothership of the city. she shops for 7ajj, i trail behind her, tired and sleepy. i just want to go home and collapse.
just to gild the lily, everytime i got in or out of the car i hit my head on the roof of the car. you do the math and tell me how many times that is.
and now that i'm back home, done with the dishes my brother left in the sink from when he had lunch, done with two piles of laundry, i can't fall asleep.
but that's ok because i got a phone call from shannon crying about how big bad myla hit her in the face. so i called myla, we had a nice talk, the end. if shannon thinks she's going to drag me into this shit, today of all days, she's even more stupid and more french than she seems.
i'm through. i don't feel like anything else for the rest of the night.
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moana
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2004 25 December :: 11.02pm
:: Music: radiohead - street spirit
love
it's amazing what you can forgive just by seeing a familiar, loved face. it's amazing what you can never forgive, just by seeing it happen right in front of you.
it's amazing what you can forget just by spending time reminding yourself why you loved someone. it's amazing what you can never forget because of how often it's rubbed into your face.
it's amazing what you can deny while looking into the eye of someone special. it's amazing what you can never deny to somebody you hate.
it's amazing how easy it is to fall in love with someone you hate. it's amazing how impossible it is to hate someone you love.
all in all, love is a pretty crazy thing, no matter how old it is. all in all, it's all just amazing.
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moana
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2004 24 December :: 5.51pm
:: Mood: *wiggles toes*
:: Music: deftones - hexagram
tangenting
you know that saying, "beauty moves mountains"? i like this one better:
"i don't need to be beautiful to move mountains, i'll just kick the mountain's ass if i want it to move."
my stepmom's sick today, so we didn't go to my dad's house. i called him to see if he and i could hang out together, sans the remainder of the bo3rikis, but he didn't pick up. i guess not.
on a more random note, how many of you have ever picked a pocket? laurence and andy, stay out of this, i know neither of you two ever has.
i had a bad dream last night about the milkman. his son, actually, to be more precise. andy, you ruined my life i hate you. i'm kidding i love you. bacher you go tyebeen hatha min hatha, ba3dain tsaween telephone, ok?
in case i don't see everyone else here that celebrates, merry christmas.
Read more..
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moana
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2004 23 December :: 7.57pm
:: Music: naruto intro from my brother's room.
the world's greatest lover...
didn't see this one coming...
 | You are Don Juan From "Don Juan De Marco."
Woobaby! You are Don Juan - dark and handsome, and the world's greatest lover. Some people find you to be a bit insane (or is that insanely sexy?). While you may not be playing with all 52 cards, don't let that get you down - you're a true romantic at heart. |
Take The Johnny Depp Quiz!
but yeah, and THEN!
i go play naruto gektou ninja taisun 3.
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