playmate101
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2004 22 June :: 11.56pm
:: Mood: ditzy
:: Music: CONFESSiONS // USHER on MTV
everytime i was in LA i was with my x g/f - usher <3
space. that's all we need.
i'll survive whatever his decisions come to. <3
[EDIT]
MoFo1788: hey u kewl for the mountain climbin next wendsday
HCOblonde31: i THINK almost positive... but i dont know when cheerleading practice starts, but i'm up for it... if i dont have it
MoFo1788: aight
MoFo1788: were tryn 2 ride tri rail in the mornin to mia
MoFo1788: get a limo 2 the place
MoFo1788: climb for like 3 hours
HCOblonde31: lol goin in style eh?
MoFo1788: go back to the station go to this cuban coffe place and then cum home
MoFo1788: its cheaper then a taxi
HCOblonde31: really?
MoFo1788: a taxi would be like 45-55 dollars for a ride there and thats for 4 people
HCOblonde31: eek
MoFo1788: we could walk?
HCOblonde31: i'm down for that too lol
MoFo1788: limo would be like 25 per person for both ways i think
like nobody's
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alwaysfalling
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2004 22 June :: 8.04pm
:: Mood: okay
i give all the love in the world to that girl i spent the day with. <333
she called me around 11:15, so i got up, got dressed and made it over to her house by 1 i guess. i bought 50 first dates and cinderella over. we watched both of em and then talked for a bit. oh how i wish i could drive.
so i'm home now. i think i will watch unfaithful since it is on hbo and has just started. i'm going away friday for a whole week and three days. no internet, so call my cell phone if you want to.
thats all for now. i'll update later maybe.
love.
1 watching |
like nobody's
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playmate101
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2004 22 June :: 12.37pm
:: Mood: anxious
:: Music: cupid // 112
there's so much that i have to say, but i don't know where to start.
hopefully... ur doing better than i am. hopefully, u got more sleep than i did. and maybe u are luckier than i am... that u don't feel sick and u can actually eat something. ((its not that i don't want to eat, cause us fat people love food, ya know))
but i was up all night. u went to bed, i did laundry, i laid in bed, hoping to fall asleep, and instead, when i closed my eyes, my head was spinning & my heart started to hurt. i'm not one to get my point across with words because my actions ALWAYS tend to speak louder, but here... i'll do the best i can.
8 months ago... there was a promise i made to u, with a simple, "yes". i promised never to hurt u, never to cheat on u, never to keep u unhappy. i hurt u... by not seeing u. i never cheated on u. and u're unhappy because i didn't see u as often as u'd like. i know ur intentions were never to hurt me, talking on the phone... and u would say it all the time, "i won't hurt u," "i'm not going to hurt u." thats when there was safety. that gave me all i needed... and then it wasn't hard to open up to u. because i knew that u weren't going to put me through pain... and i knew that its going to be a smooth flight... and it always was. now... i'm not referring to u as the asshole... because, ur not. one thing that happened won't make me say... "hey jonah is an asshole." sometimes we have to hurt the ones we love. but i don't want u to feel bad about it. there's no reason... ur reputation isn't going to be an asshole, and eventually we'll get over it. maybe with a few more weekends together... or just you and me together... or simple walks to see each other... maybe we can figure something out cause its really worth it. i just sit here... imagine us together.. and it sux. because its not true... we arent together.... now i have to go to bed and actually dream about it. i wonder what its going to be like... the first time i see u... and we arent together. think it will be easy? maybe it will be a little rough? or maybe we'll just flirt so much that it will still feel like we're going out... who knows. but i am so confused right now... that none of this that u're reading makes sense. and i'm just blabbing because it will give me less to think about. idk. i love u. <3 i can't talk anymore. i needa wipe off the tears. xoxo.
3 watching |
like nobody's
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playmate101
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2004 22 June :: 2.59am
yeah... i get hurt a lot... but u live and learn i guess.
most life's lessons are learned in pain. but hey ladies is pimps 2. xoxo
bri is a pimp TIMES two. lol. ok... no i'm not laughing, i'm really crying... i can't even pretend i'm ok.
8 months... yeah... bye bye.
1 watching |
like nobody's
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playmate101
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2004 22 June :: 12.55am
:: Mood: crushed
:: Music: DOWN // BLiNK 182
woke up at 1:15pm. after going to bed around 2:45am. rolled outta bed, jumped in the shower, watched PASSiONS. called jackie, mommy came home. went to the doctor for a physical. found out i am NOT 5 ft. i am 1/4" short of 5'. fudge. 4' 11 3/4''. o & i'm 111 lbs. not completely proud, but definitely not unhappy cause i did lose weight =)
um... got home. watched NORTH SHORE. ate some dinner. trent called. icky. *barf* talked to christian online for like 2 minutes, i'd like to see him... the last time... he stole tons of clothes & his trunk was filled lmao. i miss him.
then i got a call from britt to. damn him. wanted to go to the movies. disgusting. thank gosh for the bad connections in my room. it hung up on him & i just didn't call him back. hehe.
brittany came over. then we walked & got shane. then jb came home. then mike got home from disney. so we talked. then shane left & we talked & played monopoly. i don't think its possible for us to play without alliances or cheating lol. its funny. me & brittany did REALLY good. super slick pimps. midnight came around & they all left cause we got extremely bored.
got online... took a shower & now i'm back online with jonah & typing in here. he's confused. i don't want him to break up with me, but i know he has that instinct to do so. just because i don't see him as often as i'd like... doesn't mean i want to call it quits. i've found someone wonderful... and i'd be so jealous if he found someone else. he's everything i've wanted... and that's all i need. but i want him to be happy even more than i love being his girlfriend. yeah... so i feel completely uncomfortable talking to him right now... like because i guess that he's starting to let go... and... because of that... i don't think i have his heart 100%... which means... i can't talk to him, cause i can't be who i am when i don't have their everything. i can be myself with LOS. or with people from atlantic, and.... my boyfriend.... until now. idk i wished upon that shooting star that him & i would be together.... forever... with so much happiness. and while i was waiting for brittany to come... i took a walk... it was slow, & peaceful... just thinking about the 99 million reasons why i love him. but at this point... its what fate has in store.
i'm putting MYSELF thru pain. and i knew it the first day i said yes... "i'm so scared... cause in the end, there will be so much pain."
but i guess we only learn life's lessons from pain.
i can't sit here and think anymore... i'm getting myself worked up.
like nobody's
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playmate101
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2004 21 June :: 12.02am
:: Mood: amused
:: Music: DiP iT LOW // CHRiSTiNA MiLLiAN
LaDiEzZ iZ []D [] []\/[] []D § 2
...i've been saying this all day, cause i love poppin' my collar. haha.
"u look cute." - mom
"u look like u wanna have sex." - danielle & brittany lol
best friends say things that mommy can't. lmao
um... i worked today. could have killed someone. i don't even feel like talking about it.
i need to go to the doctor & podiatrist 2morrow. well... sorta today. w/e monday lol. 6/21/04 =) there.
hung out with brittany, ryan, jb, danielle g, shane, saw frank, saw robert, and saw scott. the old gang. nobody changes. and together... we're still the same shit talkers... into the same things... everything. but i miss them, and its great being in a group. =)
got home around 11... after being at the park, then everyone went home, ryan drove back to boca. yuh.
it was father's day today, yes. daddy was in lakeland for a paintball tournament.... when he got home his back was poka dotted so we let him rest & then he opened presents. i love my daddy. xoxo
anyways there is nothing left to say. i'mma get ready for bed... and sit & talk to ashley e. <3 peace
like nobody's
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bocaheath05
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2004 20 June :: 12.34am
funny how things work out
iluvBITP: i miss you alex. yes i haven't seen you in 2 years, but i still miss you
HandOfDoom21: i miss you to heather
1 watching |
like nobody's
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playmate101
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2004 19 June :: 12.16am
:: Mood: curious
:: Music: anthem of our dying day // story of the year
just a ghost to the world. thats exactly what i need.
yuh. i did a few chores today. then jackie & i went to the mall. i got the cutest outfit from Abercrombie & Fitch =) & she got a few things from Hollister =) i'm glad she has a car, otherwise we'd never see each other.
Got home, showed carol my new outfit, um... she tried it on =) and she got a new Bebe outfit, but i didn't try that on, although it could be useful for later. um... went over there.... babysat. lotsa freaking kids. idk who is paying me, or if i'm getting any money. but i had fun for the most part. i walked in and daniel was making fun of the gay dude on road rules, so i made fun of daniel & gave him a big wedgie, then all the girls giggled & laughed, then i played hide & seek with them... unfortunately they got bossy & annoying so we decided to play monopoly.... then it got annoying with that because these are some spoiled rotten, bad attitude kids. so i quit & watched t.v. while they finished playing. then they jumped in bed.... i gave them their kisses goodnight... lalala and they just hung out... within 15 minutes all the parents came home.
got a call from santos... lord knows what's wrong with him. crazy kid. thank god he said he had to go.
talking to jonah, neil & felipe right now. jonah & felipe are trying to embarrass each other. jonah made out with his pillow pretending it was a mermaid when he was 5 yrs. old & felipe wet his bed til he was 9 yrs. old. boy do i love being in the middle. lol <3 neil got very.... yuh.... funny kid. at times he thought he was dead. lol <3
anyways, i'm off to.... idk where. clean up my bed. there's so much crap on it cause i don't like putting things away after i take them out. a habit i need to break. lalala goodnight loves.
danielle lemme know if we are going sunday night er.... not =/
like nobody's
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boricuababy
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2004 18 June :: 9.33pm
:: Mood: drowsy
:: Music: dreaming of you
hey guyz..whaz happenin??..nutten much ova hea..juss chillan..hung out at tha pool today wid my uncle..spent sum time wid him bcuz soon hez leaving back to new york..so i spent tha day gettin my tan on..lol..my face got a lil sunburned..itz all good tho cuz it aint that bad..im stuck here watchin nico..tatie's got me babysittin cuz shez goin out for her bday..her and my mom got into a lil argument..so dat wasnt too good..right now im talkin to my meli..discussing our guy dilemmas..lol..i cant wait to go see white chicks wid her, eric n amir.im sure we'll have a good time..::wink wink::
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like nobody's
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christini
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2004 18 June :: 8.04pm
it seems i havent updated this thing in centuries....... yeah. yeah yeah. april. dadadamn. i neglect this woohu thing. why did i pay my two dollars? who knows.
summer has been fun. relaxing, no work, sun, friends, f.u.n. i love love love it. people who say they get bored over summer when they're by themselves dont know what theyre talking about. i cant seem to find enough to do all the stuff i want to do. <3
summer school starts next week : (
but its only 11, or maybe 10 days. so. the countdowns already relatively low from the first day :). im excited/scared to have him in school with me. we'll see.
i feel like im finding a new person in me.
2 watching |
like nobody's
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playmate101
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2004 17 June :: 10.10pm
:: Music: JUST LET ME CRY // ASHLEE SIMPSON
everyone moves on
yeah everyone is headed for the world of livejournal.com. i'm there.... just not completely.
i woke up early. 12ish. talked to jonah. watched my soaps. casual day. with ANOTHER headache.
got kaila's invite. gurrrlllll of course i'm going =) danielle & i are gonna show up dressed like paris & nicky, u know. haha <3
MISTER NEIL GOT HIS LICENSE. <333 i miss him so much. ahhh.
yeah so i've been listening to this song ALL day. sounds like no doubt... but no its definitely ashlee simpson =)
went to my park vista cheerleading meeting. new coach. yeah she's pretty cool. um... we got all our camp clothes in... but i can't get it til i pay for it in full. they made us pay $147.15 today... and next time we pay another $147.15 i think & then we get clothes? idk total = $294.30. plus the camp itself which was $110. which adds up to $404.30. good stuff. i'm glad my parents don't bitch about cheerleading. we're using Palm Beach Elite's gym for gym days. awesome! wayyyyy better than cheerformance with atlantic. SHHHHHIIIIITTTTTT. thank god i'm cheering here. =)
lalalalalala i love dancing in the panties =)
um... anyways... i have major babysitting tomorrow night 1,2,3,4,5,6, maybe 7 kids? idk it won't be a good pay either... if any. i wish jonah could accompany me? but i don't think he would approve. ahhh.... he's probably going to read this... five days from now. lala MUAH BABAY! xoxo
um Britt called me. ugh. 1/2 hour of worthless talking. yeah he called cause he was bored. and then i was like, "o thanks" and he goes "no... i just needed a reason to call u cause i have been wanting to, but i can't cause u will think i'm weird, so now that i have a reason... i can call" i was like... ugh just go away. but w/e
o and last night ryan called too. poor boy sprained his ankle, fractured it, pulled a muscle... he doesn't know & neither do i. but hopefully he doesn't need a cast. so weird. i never thought him & i would end up as good of friends as we are now. he calls me like every other day. idk its awesome. he's the best outta the LOS boys. he knows it too. he should be coming back from boca....... sunday? i won't be able to see him tho.
sunday night = rooney concert... if danielle & i get to go. we'll see. i'm ready. =)
ok headache again. groton's parents are looking to buy a house in the LOS again WEEEEEEEEEE yay! awesome +cries+ that would be a dream. next shooting star i see..... i have to wish upon it for her. <3
DyingEyes608: robert called me back......told me we needed to get off the drugs
out. <3 holllllllllllll - er u sexay thang.
like nobody's
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spinoangel
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2004 17 June :: 10.28pm
:: Mood: blah
nice fling with danielle and christine. sigh. how do you get so sore from merely walking to taco bell?
once christine left, i did a few things and then i got my cd player, put on deathcab and then i fell asleep around 5 and my parents didnt want to wake me up for dinner, so i just woke up. this feels very very awkward. i'm like hungry... but not.
my brother is coming home tomorrow for a week... yay!
summer school. blecch. in christines words ... "just think, 11 days."
i'm a dork. dawson made me cry today! lol. that has never happened before. it was just because he gave up joey so passionately and finally did the right thing. "i love you like you love him. the only difference is that he actually loves you back." man that just made me remember those feelings of unrequited love. that kind of love just hurts to no end.
3 watching |
like nobody's
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boricuababy
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2004 17 June :: 7.29pm
:: Mood: giggly
:: Music: confessions pt 2
thinkin bout a certain sumone..;D
2 watching |
like nobody's
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alwaysfalling
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2004 17 June :: 5.05pm
:: Mood: curious
:: Music: josh kelley - believe
so since my last depressing journal, that was friends only, haha, shut all you nosey or too cheap to pay for woohu out, the past couple of days have been enjoyable. christina rescued me wednesday night from my bedroom and brought me over to hers to show me her hot short skirt. she fed me oreos and milk, and we watched tv and she got me smiling again. i kept her up til 4 with my picture taking, and all my talking, about things i can't even remember, probably about boys. woke up at 10 to watch reruns of those silly people that run along dawson's creek. i'm almost am hooked, i just need someone to wake me up at 10 every morning to watch it. she made me breakfast and we hung around and then my mom came to pick me up. went home, she left for work, i was happy. after my date canceled on me, i took to the tv and watched movies til 6 when dad came home, finished monster, then he took me out to dinner. came home, and i went to christina's house. watched the end of moulin rouge with them, flipped the channels, talked a bit, went upstairs, talked some more while watching down with love, then i left, went to the guest room, checked to make sure there wasn't a monster in the closet, and went to bed. tina woke me up at 10:30 like i asked her to and i found out that her and christine didn't sleep at all the night before. funny, crazy girls. we watched dawson's creek and then decided to walk to taco bell. mmm... yummy food! we got 4 honks from various cars, 2 times from the mailman, eww. i was a multi-tasker on the way home, got my apartment finder magazine, swedish fish, and soda and walked. we passed these girls and i heard them whisper, "we could take them", they were like in 7th grade, losers. came home and crashed, then i left and now i'm home alone again. yay.
and now i just wonder. everyone goes to summer school next week, but then again, i will be leaving too. family time in north carolina. i'm excited. i will get tan, be more in shape, and happier i hope by the time i get home.
<3
5 watching |
like nobody's
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playmate101
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2004 17 June :: 12.22am
:: Mood: bitchy
:: Music: THiRD WHEEL // UPPER CLASS TRASH
life is stunning. or not.
i feel like someone gave me a million diamonds... but nobody did.
o0o0o0o ELLEN! uh... i got a call from this place today... called JOHN ROBERT POWERS *shrug* they offered me an interview... idk but i know my mommy won't let me do it either... i wish i could sign too. maybe if u can convince ur parents? 561-655-2777 EXT. 207. i don't know that's what they told me to call.... if i can convince my parents to say yes. lalala. i'm in the same situation... maybe we can work out a plan to get outta all this and make this work FOR us instead of AGAINST us? idk <3
anyways..... i fought with daddy today. duh! he thinks i am going anorexic or something? idk i don't even want to talk about it. +hide me+ besides that... after danielle left... i got rejected AGAIN my mommy taking me to see jonah... and then brittany offered... but yeah THAT DIDN'T HAPPEN. uh. o well. so i was dragged to brandsmart to look for kitchen appliances with the rest of the family. that was enjoyable. not. the only part that was... was when i was dancing like crazy to songs from different radios & mommy caught me and gave me a funny look. then me & my brother were pretending to jump off the second floor... and TAZ the guy that was helping my parents look for appliances yelled at us. um... then when i was singing to random songs.... mommy gave me another funny look... i do need to do more songwriting tho. i put it off.... but i've had ideas popping left and right.... i just don't write it down. stupid blonde. yikes.
jonah isn't in a good mood. so i guess i should just steer away from him tonight cause i guess i'm making him in a less enjoyable mood than he already is... and i don't like doing that. wish i knew how to cheer the boy up. i love boys. hehe.
um... i watched SIMPLE LIFE 2. good stuff. then i watched the ashlee simpson show. damn that inspires me so much. her & her boyfriend broke up tho. =/ cute couple... but not meant for each other. o well there are many fish in the sea. umm.... independence is always something every girl has to count on. i know i do. its just natural.
so i'm out. wow christian is online. i gotta talk to him! <3 peace. xoxo
1 watching |
like nobody's
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