toki
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2006 13 February :: 11.40am
Not looking forward to school. Not looking forward to this week. Feeling sick, so that's no fun. I swear, I'm done with school.
I think I'm going to change my major. To media arts. I have to take drawing classes though. And if you know me, you know my drawing abilities are slim to none.
Oh well. We shall see. I don't have to officially decide until after 1st quarter next year.
Good news: I can finish everything by the end of my junior year. 18 classes for media arts and 6 more if I minor in english. Most media art people minor in communication. I really don't want to. Communications doesn't really enthrall me. But what can you do with a media arts major and english minor?
I don't know. We shall see, friends.
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angel_bob
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2006 13 February :: 9.08am
I feel sick.
I threw up a couple times yesterday. I think that's the first time since eighth grade.
I blame you.
So I'm staying home today. Hopefully, I can make up my French oral exam.
I have to go call work now.
I love you all.
1 three drinks behind |
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toki
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2006 12 February :: 12.06pm
I Miss...
*my computer.
*going to a school that's 5 minutes away.
*having something to be proud of.
*belonging to a group.
*Elisa and Meenal.
*photo class.
*doing things I actually like.
*not having to pretend like I'm okay.
*being able to tell people that I'm upset with them. Not that I could ever really do that.
*'dates' with good friends.
*Caribou talks.
*huge sleepovers at Jorie's house.
*being a hobbit.
*Lord of the Rings.
*having people to talk to at school.
*being able to sleep.
*not being stressed.
*having more than two friends who want to spend time with me, no matter how awesome they are.
But I got a fuzzy green blanket full of static. So thats a good thing.
1 three drinks behind |
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angel_bob
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2006 11 February :: 9.57am
France
On Thursday they will mail out the acceptance letters. Since I live off campus, I will not recieve mine until Friday. However, a list of those who have been accepted will be posted on the door of the International Studies office.
So now I have more waiting.
In my interview, I mentioned the fact that cost was an issue. The head of the International Studies office said there were multiple study abroad scholarships available, including one from an Aquinas graduate who went to France and loved it. She said that the scholarships would be applied to the cost of tuition and if any money was left over, it would then be applied to the program cost.
I'm excited. I cannot wait until Thursday.
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Angel_Bob
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2006 10 February :: 6.27am
I have my interview for France today at 3.
My good friend Emily has hers right before me.
I really do hope we both make it.
I love you all.
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angel_bob
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2006 8 February :: 9.54pm
Oh and these two stupid kids honked at me when I was turning left onto Plymouth on my way home. Stupid kids, I love you both. Sorry I didn't look happy, I was in mortal pain due to the fact that I can't take my meds until Sunday.
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Angel_Bob
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2006 8 February :: 9.30pm
I told my sister that everytime she mispronounces a French word that my French professor, Michel Pichot, has little heart attacks (since he can't be rolling in his grave).
She says I can't say that anymore. It makes her feel...something. I told her it's called sympathy and her lack of a heart can't handle it.
She just commented on how her hair goes past her boob. She says it never used to.
My sister rocks.
Also, earlier she was talking to one of her friends and I told her to tell them I said hi and that they were cool beans (I had no idea who this person was). Her friend then asked Hannah my age and when Hannah replied with 19, her friend commented that she thought I was 6.
Anyway, my sister's asking me silly French questions (she's reading Les Miserables) because she's awesome.
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Angel_Bob
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2006 7 February :: 5.28pm
I went to the doctor today. I'm going on the Pill to stop my horrible cramps.
I even got away with not having a pelvic exam.
Yay!
I totally forgot to say the very reason I'm updating.
I'm thinking of joining the Peace Corps once I'm done with school.
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Angel_Bob
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2006 3 February :: 8.40am
I have the best boyfriend ever.
Check out what Nick got me:
403 Forbidden!
That's right. I'm a gay robot.
Yeah, he also got me a bunch of cheese.
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Angel_Bob
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2006 2 February :: 9.44pm
It's nice to have the books for my classes.
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sandatthebeach
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2006 1 February :: 12.22am
:: Mood: frustrated
I'm so incredibly confused with...everything. The truth is...I still miss him even though I shouldn't. I hate myself sometimes...like now. I'll stop hating after a little bit...but for now...me=no love.
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angel_bob
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2006 31 January :: 9.13am
Kelly, remember Julius Sumner Miller? Here's a site with some of his videos from the early 60's.
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angel_bob
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2006 30 January :: 10.11pm
:: Music: William Shatner (who told him to make an album?)
I have an interview with Michel Pichot (my advisor and current French prof) and the head of the International Programs Office at 3 on Friday, February 10th.
Wish me luck.
I'll know if I am accepted by mid-February.
I really hope I get in. I just don't know what they judge it on.
3 three drinks behind |
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toki
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2006 28 January :: 9.57pm
I'm tired of living my life through other people, dammit!!!
I want my own crazy college stories.
Sadness.
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Angel_Bob
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2006 28 January :: 9.25am
:: Mood: ecstatic
:: Music: Queen of the Surface Streets by Devotchka (this song makes me sing)
You're like a lovely hallucination. You get me through my current occupation.
I am officially 19 years of age.
I love you all.
P.S. I googled the word "officially" because I'm tired and I wasn't sure I spelled it correctly. The first result: What Tolkien Officially Said About Elf Sex. Just thought that was interesting.
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angel_bob
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2006 22 January :: 10.08pm
So, I was going to say that I was home and everything but I don't even know if I told you guys that I was leaving.
Well I left. My cousin (the one who had the baby 2 years ago so she could "trap what's-his-face") had her wedding this weekend. Ugh. It was bad and good. Mostly bad.
I'll tell you more probably never. I used to be so big on this Woohu thing, commenting on everyone's entries, updating every day, having a huge crush on Andy (speaking of which, we need to hang out sometime), but I just don't have time or energy.
I love you all.
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toki
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2006 17 January :: 1.39am
:: Music: Monty Python's Spamalot
It's pathetic. The times I'm most pissed at myself are when other people are down and I feel that I can't do anything about it. And I feel I even slightly caused it. I don't know, I need to remove my heart.
Replace it with cheesecake!
On a happier note:
Always look on the bright side of death!
Just before you draw your terminal breath
Life's a piece of shit,
When you look at it.
Life's a laugh and death's a joke, it's true,
You'll see it's all a show,
Keep 'em laughing as you go
Just remember that the last laugh is on you!
2 three drinks behind |
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sandatthebeach
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2006 18 January :: 12.20am
So...it's been awhile. I know. But I need to type somewhere that's not completely private but is somewhat forgotten. I would keep it private but I keep too many thoughts to myself and it's doing a lot more damage than good.
And I apologize in advance: this entry is about the boy.
So I admit...I've become exactly what I've always swore I wouldn't. I've become that attached girlfriend who can't stand to be away from her boyfriend. I can't stand myself right now. I swore I would never become this attached to another boy again. Not while in highschool at least. Brian left for school on Monday and let me tell you, I have not been very happy these past couple of days. Wait...he left yesterday...two days ago technically speaking. He could've left around 9 or 10 on Monday but because he wanted to check with parking services he left at 1:30...way too early. He got there...and of course...it was closed. Just my luck. My moodiness began there. I cried a lot on Monday. I was teary this morning on my way to school and during my Music Theory final, I just wanted to run outside and scream. I'm so fucking mad at myself for being this way. He hung up on me telling me I had to go to bed because I have finals tomorrow. Fuck finals...I don't even care anymore. I just want to get out of here. I want to grow and move out. I can't live here anymore...it's driving me up the freakin wall. And it's only making me hate myself more and swallowing myself up in my hatred of myself. I don't deserve to be happy therefore I am miserable. The only time I'm not miserable is when I'm with him. And that bothers me greatly...because I've become exactly what I go against. What happened to my independence? What the fuck?!!?! I let some guy throw it away...and he didn't even do it...in fact if he finds out, he'll be so incredibly mad at me. God I can't do this anymore. I'm so fucking frustrated with myself. You know what? I love him. I really really love him. I know he can be a little extreme at times and do things to make people go crazy...but I don't care. I don't care. He's the first person who has actually made me feel wanted in this world. He's the only person that I can be around without being afraid of being judged. He's the only person that has seen the real me...and that scares me in a way...because I feel like I trust him too much this soon. I mean. It has been 6 and a half months....but still....I wasn't supposed to fall for him like this yet....it wasn't part of my "plan". I'm frustrated.
Whatever.
-me-
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Angel_Bob
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2006 17 January :: 10.15pm
Ignore the intro, click the cut tag. An anti-Bush text adventure!
I don't know if any of you have experienced the glory and darn good times that are contained in text adventures but you should try them out.
While you're pondering your further descent into geek-dom, read this totally awesome fake text adventure game that bashes our president! (taken from this blog which actually isn't this political most of the time every once in a while)
Read more..
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angel_bob
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2006 13 January :: 8.51am
Today is going to be a long, long day.
One without lunch.
I'll update about my classes when I'm not tired/have time/think people care.
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angel_bob
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2006 12 January :: 8.06am
Girl things
My period came last night. Four days ahead of time.
I have horrible cramps and a class at 9:25 and one at 10:50. Then I have work from 1 to 5.
Oh, and we're all out of pads. And I can't find a tampon (not like I'd use one anyway). The rule states that if you use the last one or few, you're supposed to tell someone, HANNAH!
I think I'm just going to stay home. There's no way I can go anywhere bleeding and cramping. I'll go to work at 1 maybe.
Ug.
1 three drinks behind |
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Angel_Bob
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2006 11 January :: 7.22am
I don't know what this semester's going to be like.
I have math homework due tomorrow and no math book.
I have reading to do for my Cultural Anthropology class and my Principles of Business Management class but I don't have the books for those classes either.
I'm trying really hard to get by without buying the books. My family's going through a hard time financially and I don't want to ask them for money.
I'm going to go to the bookstore today and copy my math problems out of the book then see if I can borrow/read (while standing around in her room) my friend's books for anthropology. I guess I'll see if I can borrow the business book from a girl at work.
Or I could try to get by until next week.
I definitely need the math book though.
I'm stressing out.
5 three drinks behind |
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toki
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2006 3 January :: 1.23am
Today was possibly one of the most frustrating, tiring days ever.
I just want to sleep. That is all.
I think I was being moody to Ryan on the phone. I feel bad now.
Today my mom told me how my bird died that she replaced when I was in 4th grade.
My parents set off these lice bombs to kill all the lice in the house, because everybody had it really bad. We then went to Pennslyvania for a week.
They forgot to get the bird out of the house. My mom, knowing it wouldn't survive, made all us kids wait in the car when we got home. She went upstairs and that found my bird, Daisy May, had exploded. She was "all over my room, stuck to the walls". My mom cleaned her up before I got a chance to go back in the house and went out and bought a new one.
I kept that bird for another year. I LOVED that bird, but I never understood why it was all of a sudden acting so mean towards me. I feel so stupid for loving a bird that wasn't even mine. I'm so fucking blind. I was back then and I am now.
I want things to stay the same soo badly that I don't even notice when it's something completly different.
And that bascially describes how I feel about everything right about now.
Edit:: The more I look at my class schedule, the more I'm dreading it. I have to take the 5:00 train. And that's not going to be fun. I don't know. It's a bad schedule. The classes I'm taking are stupid. I don't know why I thought it was a good idea. I fucking quit. I can't do it. nope.
I need to talk to someone. I'm driving myself crazy. Not just school. Everything. Where is everybody right now?
Edit 2:: I've come to the conclusion that I shouldn't be complaining. Nothing's that bad. Right? Right. Mmmkay.
Hks.flhsklghdfig;o,s;kfjshdfip,vnsddl
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Angel_Bob
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2006 1 January :: 10.20pm
Hey, kids, remember:
IT'S ABOUT THE LOVE, NOT THE LOVIN'!
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toki
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2005 31 December :: 12.47pm
More dreams last night. Woop.
I went back to VHHS to visit the theatre and there was this play going on and everybody was acting mad at me because I was in it and missed all the rehearsals. I tried to tell them that I graduated, but Melanie was there working tech. I went to the grid to talk to Phelan and Melanie, but my shoe fell off and Phelan told me that I was the servent girl in the play and I had this whole crazy monologue that I had to memorize. The play started and it was in Victorian times and I was on stage, but I didn't have time to get off. So I had to pretend I knew what I was doing. The play was something about kids dying. Then this whole scene was going on behind a closed door and I didn't get how the audience would see it. I finally snuck off stage and the scene ended. Then Matt N. ran back and yelled at me for missing my cue, which was this crazy piano thing I had to play. I was trying to practice it, but I just didn't get it.
Aaannnnndddddd.....
I forget the whole thing, but at one point these two girls wanted to to do something mean, so they moved these rocks around in a river. I walked back after they had done it and they were crying because the rocks had never been moved before then and they ruined the beauty of the river. I remember her mentioning the small streams that had run between the cracks of the rocks. And now the stream was all murky because they kicked up all the moss when they moved the rocks.And to make it worse, it was at the beginning of the river so they destroyed the flow of the entire river.
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toki
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2005 29 December :: 12.49am
I'm being a jerk and copying Jorie and writing about my dream, fool.
It's kind of a mix between Wicked and Cinderella, except I'm almost like the servent of Cinderella. Everyone else is really ugly, even Cinderella and they're all wearing '80s style poofy dresses. I'm behind the concession stand at work and the bad witch comes up to me and gives me a pretty dress, all classy and modern and white, and I put it on and she tries to convince me to try to beat Cinderella so the prince will take me, even though I've already seen Wicked and know that the bad witch is going to get the guy. In this case, she's really ugly and can't sing but I figure everything's going to work out in the end so she has to end up pretty and nice. She then gives me Cinderella's box of stuff for the ball and tells me to destroy it all so that I can be the queen, but I refuse to do it because I knew I wouldn't get it and I didn't want the witch to win. So I sat on the box and the witch kept throwing things at me to try to get me off and to let her destroy everything in the box, but I wouldnt let her. Cinderella came and she was uglier then before, but I gave her the box and went to find the guys and they were all practicing their dancing. A few of them saw me watching and invited me to join them, but I forgot the dance so I ran away.
The second one we were on vacation somewhere and in the middle of the night we snuck out and broke into an empty vacation house. We were hanging out and everybody was relaxed but I was freaking out because I was sure that we would get caught. Then I pierced my lip and my nose, but nobody I talked to noticed it and when I pointed it out, they pretended not to hear me. I then tried to pierce Ryan's lip and I make too big of a hole.
That is all.
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toki
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2005 23 December :: 6.56pm
My house smells like fish. Amanda and Gabby are teaming up against me. I've been called more names in the past half hour than in a long time. Hence the reason I avoid family gatherings at all costs. Got sick of it and I'm chil-laxing by myself in my room.
Christmas sucks. No....wait....my family sucks at christmas.
2 three drinks behind |
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