lifesuxsodanz
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2004 22 September :: 8.52pm
forgive me...
im so sorry woohu...: (
I don't want us to drift apart too
I feel like I don't even know certain people anymore it's so sad and NO it's not michelle she always thinks i'm talking about her.lol
School is upsetting everyone has beaten it to death I won't go into the details....but it truely is disheartening to actually try and care and still not excel...I mean as of now I think I have straight Bs except for As in english and dance....that's really not so bad but I am BUSTING my ass for those mediocre grades and it can really only go down from here. Last year I got Bs just from not doing anything and when I think of all the slacking off I did....man if I tried last year I woulda ha straight As it's ridiculous. But actually giving a shit does come with the stress and the obligation to do well...these days I will stay up until 2am and study even if I know it won't help....just so I can say I tried I feel guilty if I don't.
So i run on 3-4 hours of sleep and don't eat much during the day and typically don't get home until about 6:30 and it is having some major side effects. I keep slippin gback into that altered hormonal state of conciousness where I get these depressed breakdowns and rage outbursts I can't control it. I had one of my episodes while I was driving somewhere last weekend and ended up alone in some random parking lot in the middle of the night
in a kinda bad area just trying to calm the fuck down and get home. It was scary.
I really can't even think about guys right now...there is this one guy who seems nice but shy and I don't approach him unless people force me to. I'm not into persuing anything right now I just need a nice happy thought....when you get close to people you realize they are assholes at heart it's just a general rule.
maybe I'll find someone to get "close" with at Danielle party haha. I'm loving this fuck homecomming idea hopefully it will work out.
wow this was pretty depressing good thing no one pays attention to this journal anymore.
I missed you woohu
<3
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christini
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2004 18 September :: 12.34pm
it will be a miracle if i get all a's and b's this quarter.
i hate junior year,
but i love all the fun that has come out of it. i feel like im slowly letting go of my studies and that frightens me a bit.
my parents still think im striving for national merit scholarship and all that junk, when all i want is to do the bare minimum to get my behind into UF. cause frankly, i'm sick of working hard. but then on the other side, i dont know how i'd react to seeing a c on my report card. shrug. i wish it just came more easily to me like it does to some people.
have a nice weekend.
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spinoangel
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2004 17 September :: 6.45pm
:: Music: tech romance
dude crying is like... ugh. i dont know WHY i'm freaking crying. its not right. am i lonely, am i tired, am i frustrated? idk what the hell i am. i want for someone to just hold me for like hours but im too scared to ask my parents to take me down to boca when we're going north to eat dinner and probably see a movie. sniff. i dont know.
live just gets to ya sometimes.
=*(
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boricuababy
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2004 15 September :: 11.01pm
:: Mood: sad
:: Music: angel of mine
itz crazy how things like this just happen..
well it started off as a pretty good day..normal stuff..then brice told me what happened..yesterday his cousin and one of his closest friends got into a really bad car accident..it was two guys..koby and willy..koby died in the accident..he was just 19..willy got hurt so bad that his leg had to be amputated..so many people were affected by what happened..especially the football players..koby graduated last year from ATL..i didnt know him personally but i knew of him and knew some of his friends..today before cheer practice we went to the AV room with all the football players and some basketball players so Coach Bean and some other people could talk about what happened..we went out of respect u kno??..neways..it was really sad..Coach Bean was saying all these really nice things about koby and what a great person he was..and how motivated and determined he was too..and he just broke down crying..and with me i get emotional easily when it comes to things like that..so i got all teary eyed..after some coaches and teachers spoke football players spoke about him too..wagums got up there and said really nice things so did CJ and preston..and alot of other guys too..all the guys were in tears..it was sad..it really makes you think everything over..and realize what's truly important in life..it's true what they say "live life to the fullest" and "live every day like it's ur last"..because u never know what could happen..and unfortunately it takes something this tragic to realize it all
R.I.P Koby Pierre 1985-2004
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boricuababy
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2004 14 September :: 7.39pm
:: Mood: jumpyyy
:: Music: 99 problems
wow..itz definately been a whileeeeee...
sorry..havent updated in a while..errr...i been so busyyy lately tho..cheerleading..school in general..all that good stuff..well to pick up where i left off..damage to my house due to frances consisted of shingles flying off the roof..the screen blown out and no power..our power was out for like a week..but i spent that week at my dadz which was pure hell..but hey it was better than being without light or air..oh by the way..for those of u who dont kno yet..i made a live journal too..so i'll be going back n forth..it's waves_of_hope.so check it out if u get a chance..immma still write in here tho..x0x0
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sammibaby
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2004 7 September :: 12.01pm
:: Mood: hungry
hello dear friends.
it's been a while since i've updated here.
frances is over and now we get to worry about ivan. doesnt that sound like fun boys and girls?? heh. i highly doubt it. anyhow, there wasnt much damage to our house. we lost a few shingles and screens. i lost more than half of my precious moments collection. yuh- some crying there. mommy said she'd try to replace them, but its not the same. but i guess its better than nothing.
i got to talk to my buddies. everyones good. :D. now im here at my aunts in davie. boring here- but better than home. grandpa broke his hip. :(.
well i gotta go eat.
much love to all. <3
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playmate101
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2004 3 September :: 11.56pm
i haven't updated this journal very much.... s0o just a reminder, if you wanna read or find my life interesting... i use...
L I V E J O U R N A L !
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sameen
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2004 3 September :: 3.11pm
no one can make u feel inferior without your consent
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sameen
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2004 3 September :: 3.06pm
peanut butter jelly, peanut butter jelly, peanut butter wit a baseball bat
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sameen
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2004 2 September :: 6.32pm
:: Mood: blah
:: Music: Old 80's/90's music
so damn hot but so youngg- ok that's not that 90's music lol
I think my houses is one of the few houses that the windows rn't boarded up lol. I think besides that, we're ready. My mom spent $80 just on candles- she's crazy. She loves candles and flowers- what girl doesn't, I guess? Everything in our house is falling apart neway lol, so I think my parents dont care at this point. But in all seriousness I hope everyone does stay safe and takes the right precautions.
I wonder where we will all be in two years from now ? I guess another chapter in the book of our lives. I really hope I keep in touch wit some of u ppl tho, cuz some of u totally rock. If u dont know how u r, somethin wrong witchu! Seriously, we all have so much potential. We CAN be the people who CHANGE THE FREAKIN WORLD, if we apply ourselves. Everything starts with an intention. And if ur intention is strong enough, God sees it through.
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