Local Bands Have All The Fun
A downsized version...

So it was my first concert. Yes, Ataris was my first real concert but this was my first concert concert.

It was at the Pompano Indoor Skatepark. The first skatepark I'd ever been to so we're just racking in the firsts! Amanda and I got there a bit before everyone else so we looked around. Sharif came in later and was quite surprised to see us, very happy. Chris came in and talked to us a bit, also surprised and happy. Ian was next and gave a surprised 'Hi!' in return to a greeting. Paul, Matt, and JT also came in but none of them saw us. Devin was about that time and he came right over and talked to us for a bit until Krystle called me. Seems she needed convincing to come. We convinced her. HEHEHE Yeah, so I was feeling oddly very friendly and talkative and finally Paul saw us and came over. (and and and and, shhh it's late) He was happy/surprised also.

A bit more ramblings with people. Krystle comes. An hour or so later the bands finally start up.

'S.K.A.' went first unexpectedly. That's Silly Kids on Acid with Ian as improv vocalist, Paul on set, Matt on trumpet, and Chris on sax. Paul ripped up the set, was really quite good of course. Ian was very funny though the crowd didn't seem to respond to him warmly. It was their first gig and all.. I thought they did very well.

A few of the other bands went and this is where the tragic event occured. Me, Amanda, and Krystle were sitting against the wall when a kid above and behind us hits the rail hard, causing a can of orange soda to tip over and spill right on my head. Boy was I thrilled. My first concert concert with these kids and I get doused in orange soda. Go me. So I run off to the bathroom. Washing off my hair, jacket, sorta trying to help my pants, and I'm thinking: 'I'm not going to let this get to me. I'm going to think positive, put my hair up, and go out there again. I've still got to see Andrew's and Sharif's bands.' So I became positive and came out with a soaking wet white jacket and wet hair along with a (in my mind less than a tank top) small shirt. I wasn't really bothered by the shirt.. until I got into the other room.

Krystle and Amanda were great, backing me all the way and sharing their jackets as best they could, but it wasn't enough... Paul was kind enough to lend me his jacket. So sweet.

Had a little fun nixing JT's things... What do you expect? ^____^

Next up was Andrew. I was really anxious to hear his new band since Adastra and Drowning Ophelia were beyond awesome. This time they were 'Jigsaw Jones and the Electric Cowboys' and once again him, Keith, Noah, and Jake replacing Nick (Jake also rocked the set) completely tore the place down. Everyone was rocking. They were so great. I got pictures. ^.^ Have you any idea how hard it is to get a picture of Keith playing?!

Sharif with 'Miles to Go' took his turn after another band and wow they were good. He had great vocals and I can't wait to get hold of his cd.

Most of the people we knew left after Sharif played but the last band, Anytime in July were very good.

You know, I'm pretty sure that if I had worn any other shirt but that less-than-a-tank-top one it would've been soaked in soda just because. I bet it would've been...

So I had a great night. Must go to more of these..

keep the offense to yourself
Forget my day, I'm writing the things in my head. I don't really care if you people get ideas from this stuff. If you do, forget them because they're probably wrong.

There hasn't been a moment of peace here since sunday. Sunday was the celebration of dad's birthday. I wrote on that already. You know what's fun? Jumping out of your chair when the door flies open. You fear that door opening. You fear the sounds downstairs. You fear the sounds coming up the stairs.

You know what else is fun? Getting yelled at every fucking night before an exam. I think it happened last year.. and maybe the year before.. I've forgotten on purpose. You'd think: "Leave me alone this week. Just don't bother me. You don't even have to talk to me." would be straightforward enough... okay, I didn't actually say that but it was the point always given for this week.

It's a freaking survey!! If it makes me happy and it's not hurting anyone then don't freaking kill me over it!

The thing I fear the most is what keeps me here. Naive attempts to dissuage an event perhaps destined to occur. Minor similar events have already taken place with me here though... so what would be the difference? Yes, I have a car. And past wishes, prayers, and hopes put pointless dreams in my head. Who can get away..?

I've come to notice that everyone has some kind of problem. Mental, behavioral, social. No one is without something wrong... well. Fine. Maybe someone is. Which makes me so mad... never had anything wrong in their life... they have a great life now... AND THEY THINK THEY UNDERSTAND?! Ahem.

I feel comfortable driving now..
And I know why..

My left seems stronger at driving than my right.. the only thing it's stronger at. (This isn't related to the above though.)

hear the screams
see the blood
give the girl a rose..

I hesitate to call anything love.
Stolen. Do you see this? Do you know? I'll give props to you, Amanda. Sums things beautifully. Some things.

Why is it that no one ever says congratulations on your loss? I mean.. we congratulate winnings and good tidings and happy events. But why is losing something always bad? We could lose a cold.. or lose a bad report card.. or.. or..
Congratulations on my losses.

shades of mediocrity..
what's wrong with everyone?
there's a panic in their eyes.

Try and give a hug..
They shrink away in fear.
I'm not always violent..
Not always defensive..
Walking by they give her a hug
What does she do different?

Get the hell away from me.
I can't get close to anything.

With love.................
~*~

QOTD
You expect one after this post?
Read the post now, I guarantee it won't be there once I update my personal journal.


It's always my fault... I start it and it goes from there. What do you tell a child who grows up knowing this? The poor child..
Where have all the people gone?

Forget what you hear
Forget what you see
Forget what you read.

Back the Hell Out of My Space
Today was even more hellish than I imagined. And believe me I can come up with pretty good stuff.

Math test..... was okay. Only okay. The exam I'll fail but that's alright! Like I'd expect getting an A, A, and A.

Spanish was a waste but I got my very first christmas present! It was so pretty. Was. It broke. Gotta try and fix... it... (It was a necklace.)

Health I have an 88. Shut the freak up, you didn't deal with Fochtman. She assures me it'll be an A. 28 days looks like a good movie. We should've studied it earlier.

Lunch was spent practicing with Leah. Sometimes I just feel so stupid since I pressure myself and then can't get the stuff quickly and Leah can. That's one reason why I get edgy when people are around me watching me try and learn the music. Lerner didn't have time to pass us off at lunch.

Ierace wouldn't let Leah leave class so I was sent to face Lerner. If he fucking messes with me again like this I swear things will get broken. Heh. So he gave me more than a hard time. Went back to chem where I ignored certain people, got over other things, and got hurt again. Over all I think I'm closer to some people.. unless I'm just being used. Back to the bathroom in the bandroom to call mom and see what I should do.

Mom doesn't understand and it's not like I can explain it. She tells me to put Lerner on. On my cell. Give my cell to Lerner. So I walk out of the restroom and give it to Lerner. They converse and once again Lerner makes it look like I'm the stupid unresponsible one. It's decided that I'll have till 3:15 at which time mom has to leave so Katie can get to piano.

Of course I couldn't get off the phone without a good amount of yelling and being told it's my fault. What else is new?

Back to chem.. here is where the hurt comes in. And I have an 80. Technically 79.6. I can't do very well in that class.

After school is a dash to tell Leah then a dash to the bandroom. Have you any idea how much unnecessary stress I have right now? I tossed people out of my way with my words. I played horribly of course. But he had no choice but to sign us off.

WAS THAT SO FREAKING HARD?! Like he couldn't sign us off and save us stress and pain and all that. I was willing to pay the stupid fees.. anything. It doesn't reflect him anyway.

Yelled at on the way home. They finally leave and I turn the radio up really really really loud.

HAHAHAHA No, there was no studying. I found an even better way to spend time!

Some random person IMed me saying I was on their list.. So I made a new friend! oO;;
They claim to be a drill seargent and we had a 4 hour chat about the military and politics.
Yes I was careful.

I think I've concluded he is not what he says.. but it's difficult due to his vast military knowledge. I think HE is the 17 year old son he claims to have.

There's some other stuff but I guess I forgot it.

Oh, news has circulated about the concert friday. I am going. I don't care about what's happening on the weekend... I'll be at that concert.

I find it funny how it's impossible for either someone who does nothing all day to go buy food or for someone to get something on their way home. Hmm.. What's that grumbling sound?

You know what else is fun? No freaking consideration. Just leave me alone for this week. Besides the fact that it's that time of month. You know what? I think the parents have it timed every half year that on this week they'll start... Such stress that leads to lethargy.

Gifts should be brought in slowly this week. They're mainly what I got from Japan so... be happy? I did the best I could. Maybe they'll be belated gifts when we come back from break like I sometimes do.

secrets, secrets, are no fun, secrets are for everyone
Saddam Hussein was captured today.
I guess everyone forgot Osama Bin Ladin. Or that's what the government wants us to think. And please don't attack me. I understand how important this capture was also, for the Iraqi people.

Kai's alive. After 20 days of no knowledge about her she's been spotted at the moment of signing offline. Impressive she actually came online on a name I'd recognize. I'll bet my being on scared her off as well.

I thoroughly do not have a will to do math. I paid attention in all but vectors which was in one class and now I can't understand vectors. Thus I fail it all. Stupid sin and cos that aren't much on the test.

Mom went off on me because I want to do an Angel (think the tree in the mall for the less fortunate kids). Is it so bad to want to get my own gift for once? You know, she gets the gifts for friends. She makes me take them to them. And it hurts. Yeah, 'nough of that. I'm getting something this time. Just gotta figure out how..

Dad's birthday is tomorrow. Celebrated today. Found out yesterday night. I have nothing for him.

I'll be failing exams also. Specifically history and chemistry.
I wonder about band... Think he'll take my grade down for not being able to keep up with his elongated measures? Watch him. Then he won't let me in Wind Symphony because I had Leah try and help me keep up with him while I look at what chime I'm hitting (something you can't do without looking, thank you). And I swear if he doesn't let me.. next year.. all hell'll break loose. The seniors have my back though, so it should be good. I'm glad I have them all on my side.

What else to blab about? Oh.
No, I will not be talking about friday or those classes. I said that in here before didn't I?

It's late once again. Don't you love not eating dinner? At least I can say there was a late dinner and a snack of cake..

Spin the Bottle
Keiko (aka Willy) died today from pneumonia. It's so sad. He was 27, older than most captives but younger than most free by about 8 years. He was in captivity having not adjusted to freedom and the people there say he passed on quickly.

Throw a rose to the waves in tribute..
Tribute..
Why does that work awkwardly?

Santa's Parade today.. It went well I guess. I had a good time. Lot's of compliments, some missed opportunities, bit of dizziness. If only the others would learn their parts... -.- And decorate their drums! Hmph. It'll be a requirement next year.

Melissa's 18th birthday today. Had fun their too but we were all soo tired.

picking up the shattered pieces
Shattered fragments of the days gone by reveal only those left most intact. I forget things easily nowadays. Emotons, feelings, and other rememberings of the day:

Spanish until we get to school
Dad took us.
Won my first bet- against Richard
$1 for me!
Help from Danny
Math at a distance
Spanish test..
Taking test..
Moving on to part 2: Album
Doing Album...
'Kristen, stop right there and you can do your presentation.'
'We're... taking a test.'
'I put myself down as the third person for a reason......'
'You can go now, come on.'
Scrambled and mumbled and shaking.
Breast Cancer with only girls
Reviewing chem all class
Lunch lady searched special for the last sandwich left
Helping a friend all lunch
She's not worthless
Good at lots of stuff
Chem test to be easy
Chem test impossible
Dazed and blanking
Some say easy
Some say hard
As always
Run home
Get ready
Face burns, stupid dry skin
Can't find anything to wear
Take time to look nice.. no one really cares though.
Pop new CD into car radio
5:20
Stupid Lerner kept basses locked in room and yells at us
Against marching.. kids outside simply a bit late
Only kids.
Out of place
Chat with Leah about injustice
Story of Lerner and someone's dad
I'd be happy.. some people scared
'Symphonic sounds like beginner.. they're better than that.'
Chimes won't play when hit
Solo during Lerner's speech
'Don't get any ideas.'
'I already got my class switched.'
Stunned as hope drains
Intense sadness.. why? Many reasons.
Lost opportunities.
Missed parts in Sleigh Ride
Dances with Leah
Overwhelmed and grief stricken
Magda being nice, knew she was
Special invitation.. I'm special..
Hard drive home
Speeding
Passing accident.. death? Interesting..
Telling story
'Pushed' mom
Leave me alone then
Kay
Blaring music
Unnerving calm
Helping


sillygrl4256
Status: 1 Month
I said- YA PATHULA! WELL, IM GONNA GO REQUEST U GUYS AND PLAY SOME GAMES SO I CAN EARN THINGS! BIBI! U GUYS BE PROUD! U MADE A GOOD INFLUENCE ON A LIL KID TODAY! - and a merry christmas to ya!


Who would've expected? I calmed an entire chat. Got them to exchange apologies. Continued peaceful chat between once warring groups. Taught a little kid something.

The night draws close. Sleep beckons but knows it is not near me.

Dancing with Shadows
A looooong day today.
Mrs. Schilit is really nice! She believes I don't feel well.. which I guess I don't.. but I get to sleep and be lazy and all that without getting yelled at by her. It helps.

Band was grand. Eagles for Excellence. Actually, he didn't know why he got the award, it was a complete surprise to him. Yay for him!
I bet you're right Lauren.

Well I walked back with the award winner and I was quite hyper after that donut! The guys don't usually see my so hyper. We moved stuff over to the auditorium and.. oh you've got to hear this.

So we're sitting on the floor cause there's no chairs and Lerner's listing what big stuff only should be taken over. So then he starts to group us to get stuff over.. and he does all the guys, then stops at the girls. He says, "You three can work on getting the mallet instruments ready to be taken down and wait for some of the guys to come back." I was like heeeeeeeell no. -.- A girl can carry just as much as the guy.. at least if they have to. I mean, getting the guys to do is naturally what we'd do. But the fact that he flat out said we weren't capable of doing it... I don't think so. Next year is definitely going to be interesting.

So all the stuff gets done and that takes a good while.. so me, Leah, and Jenn are coming back over and we pass by Paul.. standing outside the band room.. so we step inside to see what he was hiding from and it was an all out improv. SO GREAT! I love those moments. The guys just pick up any instrument, wall, or door and start making a beat. It was definitely an Indian-ish (from India people!) sound and was totally awesome. So we listened to that for a while, then got another 10 minute lecture. He wastes so much time.

Got some chem help....
Maybe I should've forced myself to learn it instead of enlisting help as an incentive... I wasted a good few hours of his time from which he got nothing.. and I upset him a lot. Oo;; 10 minutes on one problem. That's really sad Kristen. Just that mood where it won't click. GRRR
So I feel bad and it'll probably be a while till I ask for that kind of help again. Joyous.

Oh, and the molar mass of hydrogen is not even 1.

Parents pissed me off not too long after I get home. Too much fun.

I've too much homework.. it'll be a late night. But hey, I didn't do anything over the weekend so this is what I get.

Oh, I got the Bilge Dice and Let It Snow avatars recently. Great fun.



OH!! And I know you all went back to that link and clicked those 5 buttons today RIGHT????!?

Reach Out and Touch Someone
Got up at an ungodly hour but that's okay cause it was with Krystle and for the children.

Some of the kids from the Caridad were there. I love them. So sweet! And they do like us beyond like, putting up with us. We're really a good influence and presence for them and it's amazing. Nancy just like, clung to me when I spotted them. And Eliana is not as shy though she still doesn't talk much.. you can see she likes you. Even Ronald and Aldo said hi and gave us hugs! Getting guys to give you hugs.. that's often a feat in itself! And Krystle met the third brother. Too funny. What was his name?

I drove to the haircut. Mom still makes me nervous and feel incapable because she's afraid. Can't parents realize that's not what we need? Geez.

It's a long wait at the salon.. an hour per. Picked up a random magazine and read through it. It was Marie Claire. There's acutally a lot of awesome articles in it. One on the daughters of actual dictators. Another on the widows of an African country split by 2 warring divergences.. but they've banded together to rebuild and are adopting as many war orphans as possible... from either side. So there's kids from both sides of the now over civil war living together. Quite impressive. Another on Angelina Jolee (sp?) whom I didn't really know much about except she was quite good in Tomb Raider. She had one impressive goal I liked: to adopt orphans from around the world and have a big family while teaching each their own culture and background. Then the kids can teach and share with each other and there would be World Peace within that family. An example of unending possibility. Simply amazing. Fell asleep a couple times during the hair cut.. the half asleep type state.


The fireplace was lit while we were at a haircut. That'd be like the 2nd time in 5 years. I always ask if we can light the fireplace... It's gas so it's not as cool as Colorado used to be but still. Mom always said no.

I dunno.. getting lathargic again. I really end up not liking weekends.

Lord of the Rings: The King Returns comes out the 17th. I WILL see it in the theaters this time. Several times.

It's late again tonight. How do I do this?


'If I am a nobody and nobody is perfect, does that mean I am perfect?'

detachment of love?
Finally the week of feeling ungood is over. However you'll notice the time. That's right. In my mind I've been in bed for -55 minutes. Mmmm That real annoyed mood is back. Pissed off. This stuff'll be all out of order:

White Oleander is an awesome movie. One day after school I found it and my sister came up stairs and we just watched a bit... then got fixed. It was captivating and we watched it entirely without doing anything else. When it was over... it was like 2 and a half hours later. Man, everyone should see that movie.

FINALLY GOT THE NAME!!! MUAHAHAHAHA!!
The movie is Titan A. E. Found it today like I knew I would eventually. It's animated and amazingly cool. I wanted to buy that DVD. Hmmm.

Power totally ignored me in class today. I was annoyed and just about to throw paper balls at him... However when he found out he was ignoring me he was very apologetic and sincere about helping me. It was funny to say the least.

Chemistry was not a fave of mine today. No Swanson like I predicted. Sub was.. yeah he was stupid. About being a sub. Other than that he was... interesting. Did I write about last class? I didn't?! Well then!

Of course I missed it, but it being my class, being filled in, and seeing the aftermath counts just as much. So I left for the bathroom since I didn't feel well and it seems the sub found the shower. You know.. the science shower. So... he walked over to it... and pulled the handle. Yep. You read right. He pulled it. So the water trickled then ran like faucet. He couldn't stop it. Called in a janitor and they couldn't stop it until the pushed up really hard. But when they did... something like clanked and the water gushed like it was broken. Course this is splashing the floor and puddling instead of going down the drain. The janitor finally got it off. But it was still trickling when I came back.

Other things about chem today upset me I guess. That or it's manipulation and confusion. Quite possible with this strange headache type thing I've got going on


You know what's fun? Selling chocolate with the jerks on this campus. You know what's even more fun? Finding a counterfeit bill in your envelope of cash. Yeah, that's what I said. Someone is so dead. You SO do not play me like that. I know it was some black girl who gave it to me when I was in a rush of course between classes with books and whatnot.
So I was standing in line at lunch before going to Power and I listen in on convo's and one proved muy interesante. This black kid had the same counterfeit bills I had been given and was showing them off to his friends saying "I'm using them for chocolates." I memorized that jerk's face.
Right so I take Katie to get her box of chocolate and tell Power I've got a problem. Tell him about the bill. Follow him in and and talk to the head of police on campus. Yeah.
You know what? I can't wait for the next counterfeit bill I'm given. Ripped to shreds... that person had so better hope there's an AP around. Heh, fine I'm not that violent. Nor do I want to be suspended during exams. But they'll be getting it. A warning to all chcocolate sellers.

Note to self: Have Katie count money and make sure Cody didn't short change me when breaking his 20. I counted 20.. or 19.. he said I gave him 16.. The headache thing again? Or I lost it today.


7th Heaven and Degrassi both had segments on self-mutilation and cutters today. They are both very good. The 7th Heaven deals more with the 'why' of the issue and explains it very well. Degrassi showed it's prominence in teens. This is an important issue and it doesn't get the attention it needs. It's nearing anorexia and bulemia for problems with teens yet it's never talked about. I think I'll petition for it to be added to Health class. Hmmm..


I really wanted to go to the Buzz Bake Sale today.. see all the cool bands. Wasn't going to happen but I can dream.

I also want to go to the Battle of the Bands of the local bands. And see Ian, Sharif, and Josh's bands play somewhere. I really really want to see these bands. Hmm.. gotta find good connections.


Oh yeah, and 3 good timings today. I was quite happy with that.

Now I'm at -85 minutes. Night.


"You don't get to know [my] secrets." ~Guess.