that is so retro

:: 2004 18 April :: 3.13pm
:: Mood: stressed
:: Music: naughty girl- beyonce

I HOPE I GET ALL MY HOMWORK DONE!
..yes stressin mi tarea..

but i had a good weekend..friday juss chilled..saturday went to city place with amara n ta..then to circuit city n then to the gardens..it was fun [yes-amara] then they dropped me off home..wow-we're a bunch of liars lolol. and i went to carlos' to see the shining..umm yea- def. not scary but i did miss the last 20 minutes or so. then we watched a chris rock stand up thing..it was funny..i had fun there too..now im here doin fuckin homework..wish me luck!

<3

:: 2004 18 April :: 12.05pm
:: Mood: calm

procrastinating.

uhhh. altered my journal only a little. to fit "title and registration". it's supposed to be playing on it. and.... it plays on my comp. but i assume it doesnt on yours. i got so frustrated last night i just stopped trying to fix it. can you hear it? =\

today = sun, art, love

edit
had a good day. a little guilty though. sigh. not enough time to write what i want to!

2 . | <3

:: 2004 17 April :: 11.37pm

mmmm dance show day 2...went pretty good we were all sore and tired so maybe not as good as friday night but eh...me and brittney's duet actually did look good tonight neither of us fucked up and we were all on count so I felt way better about that.

After the show I was so tired I just wanted to go home, brittney nicki and jenn were going to bostons i think and hillary richelle and co. went to fridays, Jessica went home like a loser lol I had an exhausting day.

woke up at 7:20 took a shower got dressed and did my makeup for delray affiar michelle picked me up at 8:30 we drove around looking for a parking spot forever and finally found one abotu a millon miles away from teh stage. So then we walked and walked and pondered what the hell we were doing up this early. So yeah did the show and it sucked cuz we were all too sore and tired to care lol.

After that michelle and lauren came back to my house to work on lauren and my captain audition dances we have to teach the squad. It helped a lot just having some1 there to give me opinions I choreographed a lot more and michelle helped me fix my formations. And we filled in sum holes in laurens dance. lol were not really competing against each other we just want to be captain and co captain together so we have to beat every1 else. crazy dance politics its ridiculous sumtimes. I want co captain next year I don't think I can handle captain but idk they mite not even give me that. ahhh this is stressing me out so bad I just want banquet to be over so I know.

lol lauren michelle and i have to be the oddest human beings on the planet. It is so funny when we are together. Michelle losing her car keys in the lining of her warmup pants at subway...well either u take off ur pants or we hang u upside down and shake until they fall out.....lauren having the nerve to be a backseat driver when her car is totaled. lol another odd yet nice day.

talkin to jackie myers shes so cute...lol I think shes gunna try out for EE nxt year and danielle was considering it i think...that would be fun if they made it..well my children I think it is sleep time or something of the sort I shall see you soon.

~so much love~
Jess

1 . | <3

:: 2004 17 April :: 8.01pm
:: Mood: crazy
:: Music: THiS WAY: DiLATED PEOPLES FT. KANYE WEST

turn it up... a LiL louder.
felipe: hey hey hey
briana: hey!
briana: wuts up?
felipe: just listenin to some music, and waiting for jonah to come
briana: hmm.... i have his wallet.
felipe: lol
briana: eh... it was empty anyway O:-) lol
felipe: now it is
felipe: lol
briana: lol i swear it already was
felipe: lol i kno
briana: whatcha guys got planned?
felipe: goin to dinner
felipe: hes takin me out on a date
felipe: lol nah
briana: lol cute
felipe: i wont steal him from you
briana: lol thank u. that just simply washed my worries away <3
felipe: haha

just thought this was a funny conversation... s0-o i thought i'd add it, in addition to the recent entry <3

:: 2004 17 April :: 4.36pm
:: Mood: straightened out.
:: Music: YOU SHOULD HAVE KNOWN BETTER:: MONiCA

my freak girl told me now she a christian, my white girl wanna move back to michigan
internet out since wednesday late night.

school can suck my left nut. i can't wait until cheerleading tryouts come for park vista so i can make my final decision on where i am going. atlantic just isn't worth it anymore. but yeah, i wanna take pretam's advice... big party where even anand is wasted getting a lap dance by some fat bitch lmao.

so yeah, yesterday was friday, and i didn't think i would end up doing anything, but i did. hadn't talked to jonah... and called him. he wanted me 2 go 2 some baseball games at SHS. he called up mike & we all hung out over there. turned out to be a great, relaxing night. almost fell asleep on his shoulder... poor me, i was s0o worn out. mike is so dumb lol, i miss that short kid. yet i still won't see him next year. and jonah is goin' to trinity for baseball... crazy. but yeah... mommy picked me up around elevenish.

+licking the phones
+jackie threatening to hurt jonah over the phone.
+messin' around in the dug-out.
+mike & his phone.
+lights out. rape. i love u.

sometimes... after so long, u forget what's important in life. u forget why u love someone, who cares 4 u, what u need 2 do 2 survive, ur wants, ur hopes & dreams...

i felt like i didn't need him anymore... but then seeing him last night... made every worry in the world go away, imagine how great life could be if i could see him everyday. i forgot who cared 4 me... until after that chem test & all i needed was a hug from my REAL best friend... someone who has been there forever. ride or die, 5 years. i forgot y school was important... i just had that mood where i'd rather drop & get the G.E.D. i forgot what i wanted out of life...

now, i'm ok. <3 the hug from her & the night with him.... i love u 2 more than this world can hold love.

boricuababy

:: 2004 17 April :: 12.54pm
:: Mood: frustrated
:: Music: fuck it

ugh..im pretty stressed out right now over a couple things..it sucks..i juss gotta get over everything and not "make a big deal outta it"..i'll deal..itz juss gonna be done my way and itz gonna take time..everyone knows that..so i dont get why people are still talkin and botherin me bout it..wutever..im gonna try to not let it bother me..imma juss think of it this way--in 2-3 yrs imma be out..imma go to college away from here and i wont hafta put up wid this shit ne more..

3 . | <3

:: 2004 16 April :: 10.34pm
:: Mood: CRAZY

AHHH so much to do tonight my adrenaline high and this coffe mocha milkshake from steak n shake will surely help. Dance show was tonight I feel so good I mean yeah some of teh dances blew ass mostly because of awkward costume (ehh pimp suit anyone?) but some of them I felt awesome about. The trio with me britt and dorianna was...lol we did really good for learning it a few days ago even though brittney stopped dead on stage for like an entire 8 count.

Danielle and Christina came and gave me big hugs after it made me feel so great and happy. lol all the sexy moves were for you danielle. Janyll's mom bought me flowers and I saw some other people I knew....sterling, sum other IB guys Jessica C...dom was there I think didn't wanna talk to him.

Drove lauren home cuz she messed up her car lol shes commin over tomorrow to work on our audition dances. Oh yeah I got nominated for captain next year so I have to choreograph a dance to teach to the squad. I'm so nervous and stressed.

tomorrow morning we have an eagle ette show at the delray affair then me and lauren are working for a few hours then it's back to dance show for the second night...the grandparents are comming.

I had an hour to kill after school before I had to be at rehersal and Jimmy had an hour to kill before swim so we began to drive around aimlessly. lol aimlessly that is until he decided we were going to nick warrens house. so yeah spent an hour there watching jimmy play halo and hoping nicks dog wouldnt bite me and listening to him and his dad's extreamly amusing conversation. lol his brother Dave must have thought it was weird considering he just saw me in stat last hour and I show up at his house for no reason. aw well it was interesting. I miss hangning out with Jimmy no matter what we do it's always good times.

So my dad got a job managing a new American Eagle opening in the pga mall, that means 40% off of everything for jessica and i love that store. They only hire 16 year olds in boca though so I'm not gettin a job there. : (

In other news...couldn't go in and finish my chem test why is that? Mrs. Kenyon fucking lost it! she ALWAYS loses my papers. I know she thinks I took it home to cheat with too even I'm not that stupid theres no way to cover that shit up.

ok so overall really good day all the dancing I've been doing this week has kicked in the endorphins I'm slightly pleasant to be around at the moment, this will never happen again.

off to clean and do homework...this motivation cannot go to waste.

~good night to all~

1 . | <3

:: 2004 16 April :: 4.48pm

in the words of a broken heart it's just emotions taking me over.
i'm caught up in sorrow, lost in the song.

lj says it all

:: 2004 15 April :: 9.02pm

don't know why I'm updating, I'm not in the mood and I have so much to do. *sigh*

omg I love Jimmy he just helped me so much with a chemistry question I think he needs to be my teacher. when you just give me a prblm and tell me how to do it I get it...I don't need to know all the theories and reasons behind shit I never plan on looking at chemistry again in my life.

yeah well as you see my test did not go very well. Nobodys did I dont think but I really didn't know a goddamn thing. We're all going in to finish it during 5th hour tomorrow. Hopefully I can salvage a D or maybe a low C??

Dance show is tomorrow I'm so not ready. One of our costumes is so horrible I just don't even wanna talk about it. lol we are pimps.

The dress rehersal went alright I guess it seems like a lot of people are actually comming to watch I'm suprised. I am sure to fall on my ass at some point now. lol

rite now with god as my witness I vow to be good for the next two months. No more lying/drinking/drugs of any kind. Not because it's the right thing to do lol but because I wanna go to gainsville with michelle this summer.

MisScarlet219 (8:17:05 PM): im going to be good for the rest of the year
MisScarlet219 (8:17:11 PM): no more drinking and lying and shit
MisScarlet219 (8:17:17 PM): cuz i wanna go to gainsville this summer
CircaPunk93 (8:17:31 PM): thats good about the first part
CircaPunk93 (8:17:33 PM): whats in gainsville
CircaPunk93 (8:17:35 PM): drinking and lying?
MisScarlet219 (8:17:38 PM): hell yea
MisScarlet219 (8:17:42 PM): only doing it right
MisScarlet219 (8:17:46 PM): with college guys

lol wat can I say...nah I'd be careful though I really just wanna go cuz I don't want to lose touch with Hillary and Richelle and everyone when they move up there. And I do wanna see the campus since I will most likely end up going there. Evan is afraid I'm going to get raped and murdered....wouldnt be a huge loss to humanity I don't think

I still have to convince my parents tho...theyre not compleatly sold on it.

laaaaaaaaa lalalala I have much to say but I suppose I will go and do things that need to be done....damnit

no maybe I won't maybe I will lie and sit here talking to people

as long as I had the intention of doing something productive at some point in the day I feel good about myself. Now that I have filled my moral obligations for the evening...I shall return to my CHUB & co.
here's your happy thought.....smile for me

~Remember The Best Kiss You Ever Had~

1 . | <3

christini

:: 2004 15 April :: 7.22pm

sigh. yeah. things, suck. i guess. i dont feel like re-telling all my recent occurances, so, theyre on livejournal. username _asyousleep
have anice day.

alwaysfalling

:: 2004 14 April :: 10.58pm
:: Mood: restless
:: Music: rooney

yeah, right about now, i feel like driving through those mountains in california, thanks rooney.

my dad thinks i am going to bed soon. yeah right. i slept for 3 hours when i got home, i can stay up for another 3 hours. doing what? who knows, i'm not ready to go to bed. tomorrow is thursday, this week seems to be going by relatively fast.

i can't wait for summer. first i gotta find a job first and a hot boy to hang out with.

<3

3 . | <3

:: 2004 14 April :: 10.24pm
:: Mood: ditzy
:: Music: josie, your my source of most frustration.

kayli... that song is in my head! lol 850,000 retard points for Carrrrrrr etc. lmao
mmm chem test
mmm ap art hist test

studied all night.
break. fast. haha. back to work.
kiwi & pineapple, uhoh.

how i love morone's class with my brown friends. <3 anand & pretam.
PUNCH ME!
Anand doing my SRI for me... thank u sir.
Mason playing peekaboo... niiiice.
Neil trying to force me to fail my tests for tomorrow. thats his encouragement to get me to go to Park Vista. <3 i'm coming, soon enough.

1: u know if u blow in ur cup... it sounds like a plane is above u.
2: there's a plane in the air... above us.
{silly me, i feel... BLONDE}

i think morone makes us all feel like his dumb bitches. and to think... a pop quiz is going to help us.... HOW?! i didn't even recall the 4 questions, or the definition of duplicity (not stating what the title states) until after the quiz. and... i did read Slaughter House Five. and i still failed that test. 38pt. + 18 pt curve (supposively) = 56% niiiice. damn, homie. i hate it. i can't wait to see what that damn 10pg research paper grade was. ugh!

we need to get these Economics notes down people. let's post that plan tomorrow. lots of work, major extra credit.

MoFo1788: hey ur skipin one day wit me
MoFo1788: and sum friends
MoFo1788: ok?
MoFo1788: ok

.... really... i love how i can get my yes or no in there, in less than 2 seconds. <3 ur the best, moo. quack.

bed time. good luck. xOx

p.s. ellen, holl-er, i'll help ya with ur journal. we'll make it PuRRR-Ti.

boricuababy

:: 2004 14 April :: 4.37pm
:: Mood: ehh
:: Music: i pray-amanda perez

"life's tough but i'm tougher"..
being grounded sucks ass!!!

1 . | <3

:: 2004 13 April :: 9.22pm
:: Mood: content

just to tell u... how i feel.
if u are keeping woohu... and plan on giving me the money.. the last day i'm taking it is on friday... because i'm making the money order on saturday <3

s0o i've talked to my dad about leaving atlantic... he said i can... whenever i am ready. i'm going to try out for Park Vista Cheerleading and see how those results come out. if they're good... tah tah atlantic, if they are worse than varsity... imma have to figure out a way to stay at atlantic without being in ib. but i don't find happiness in atlantic. these last 2 weeks have been better... but... its not how i want it. i've got goals, and a plan.... i need time to manage everything... and ib isn't helping me, its just a hassle. score... i'm psyched, but knowing that danielle isn't coming with me... and i won't be in the same school as her... makes me feel so.... empty. just the thought. which makes me not even want to think about it. what's a girl to do?

im talking to my home fry jose & just got done talking to alex, so imma go now. peace homes. xoxo

5 . | <3

:: 2004 13 April :: 8.10pm
:: Mood: busy
:: Music: konstantine.. cant stop

i feel like i'm in a tornado. and all i'm running on is adrenaline right now. i feel so busy, like i always have something to do. i guess i do. all this stuff is so overwhelming, but i ... i dont know. i feel tired. but then i feel obsessive and then i need to find something else to do. i'm such a freak.

APRIL 15th ART SHOW. 5:30-7:30. come.

i think i'm going to find some more stuff to do...

random things to say
it's really hard to let go of someone.
it's really hard to see someone let go of you.
it's really hard not to fall into the same mistakes.
it's hard to sacrifice your wellbeing for someone else.
it's easy to love you.

it's to dying in another's arms
and why i had to try it.
and if this is what it takes to lie in my mistakes,
and live with what i did to you.
and all the things i put you through.
they'll never hurt you like i do.
this is to a boy who got into my head
with all the pretty things he did.
you know you keep me up in bed.
this is to a boy who got into my head
with all these fucked up things i did.
maybe you can keep me up in bed.
did you know i've missed you?
god, i miss you.

1 . | <3

:: 2004 13 April :: 7.39pm
:: Mood: energetic
:: Music: freek a leek

HOW YA LIKE IT DADDY?
goin on 3 hours of sleep isnt fun..but im gettin used to it sadly. today was alright:
spanish- nuttin
math-NO test! but i was ready for it for once!! lol..we had a sub..so we didnt do anything..amara did my make up..n i chatted with my papa smurf..lol
chem- NO quiz! i was happy about that..and i kinda get it now..still gotta study tho..then amara left me..and yeah..some ppl are fuckers..heh.
lunch- ate..thats about it
art- boring..talked to my kaila..carlos didnt get his hair did lol..then WOW- talk about a giggle attack..lmao [kaila]
bus-talked to amy n kaila..fell asleep..lol rainy weather makes me tired..

then went home and had dinner..went to my first aerobics class..it was easy im hopin it gets harder..lol..n soon my friends comin over so i can tutor him..well he'll be here any minute..so im out.

x0x0..<3

1 . | <3

:: 2004 13 April :: 4.32pm
:: Mood: creative

*Written in the Stars*

It's like a relentless design that I can't help but fill
and we were written in the stars against all sanity and will
so let me struggle in your arms just hating love and loving hate
it's like a knife deep in my chest but it just feels so fucking great.

We're like a twisted cosmic joke 'cause heaven's hard up for laughs
forget the scene they wrote it's not my words I take 'em back
but there's no use leaving now
because I'm only comming back

I don't control this life
don't feel a thing but somehow it's right...

Why does my body set on fire when we're caught up in the night
it's like some predestined desire i'm not strong enough to fight
so fuck it all let's be ironic and make out beneath the stars
surrender to reluctant passion and split open all these scars.

We're just a twisted cosmic joke cause heavn's hard up for laughs
forget the scene they wrote, it's not my words I take 'em back
I'm really trying to give up
but something keeps us comming back

so here's to the goddamn night
it's real but there's nothing right
it's ok not to feel tonight...

<3

2 . | <3

:: 2004 13 April :: 4.17pm

ok much to tell....i will prbly forget it all

lol yesterday I was so late to school and my mom wouldnt give me a note so I just wandered around the annex most of the time. Passed like 10 aps didnt get stopped once it was nice...chilled in the dance room, met some hatian girl had a nice chat lol then we met a substitute teacher, a senior aid from the IBO and some other interesting people....what a random morning

3rd hour went to the CAS fair...me danielle and heather wanna do habitat for humanity lol dont laugh I can build a goddamn house if i want to...every1 do it with us!!

5th hour took a health test then left early to go reherse with brittney...then stats was all review

then I had still more rehersal after school (if NE1 wants tix to the dance show gimmie $10 this week)

came home was in a very take control bitching out mood. lol logan pissed me off as u see so I biched him out on his journal but he pussied out and erased it.

Evan made me so fucking mad. I always let shit go with him but I wasn't letting him get away with this one. I swear all guys are too goddamn busy thinking with their dicks to have a shred of common sense.

I felt so good though, im finally starting to feel like me again. Ive taken too much shit from people lately fuck being a pacifist and letting people walk all over you, I'm taking back control, getting my self-respect back a lil too. If that means remaining on the side of virtue more than i usually would...idk i'll buy a vibrator or sumthing idk lol.

After last night I went in my room and just started writing I havnt done that in forever it felt so fucking good. idk how bad it is but i wrote sum lyrics and a poem I miss being able to let it all out thru that. maybe ill write em in here.

~Be Yourself Always~

:: 2004 12 April :: 9.10pm
:: Mood: tireddd

GOTTA STAY AWAKE N DO MY WORK!!
its hard tryin to be good lol.

today was alright..got to leave health for a half hour to see community service stuff..we signed up for pretty much everything lol. then i went to sameen's house with amara n kaila to have a math study group..went well..i feel confident. thanks sameen! and i cant forget all those convos..you guys are great!! now i gotta go n finish art history homework..

<3

:: 2004 12 April :: 6.33am
:: Mood: light headed
:: Music: all falls down:: kanye west

zero to none.
there needs to be a song that i could listen to everytime stupid shit like this happens. cause i really could kick him in the ass right now... if i had the energy.

i can't see out of my right eye, i'm so light headed that when i LAY DOWN i'm still dizzy, my eyes are so red from crying, and my throat is scratchy from screaming for him to stay away & just go to work. i don't think i've ever felt this beautiful before.

so the day starts: 5am- take a shower, blow dry the hair, get dressed. mommy said last night that she would wake up because she wants to do my makeup... how sweet of her. only when i got her up, i had to go. so i was just gonna do it, but my dad's voice, screaming at me that i had to go (which i already was aware of) scared the me so bad that while i was doing the eyeliner thing, the black line ended up across my face, like when someone hits ur elbow when ur writing. so i tried cleaning it off & hurrying up, but... daddy just bitched & bitched. finally, he said, "find ur own fucking ride, i'm leaving." so the end was... he left, came back to bitch at me some more while i layed on my bed and felt the spit from his nasty mouth on my face... so i covered it with my blanket next to me... and he bitched at me for "missing the bus" which technically... he's the one who is always late because he has to gather his paintball shit and everything into the car every morning... which is just bull fucking honkey shit. but i don't know... his words are so abusive. after he is done screaming at me... i feel my body weaken and i feel like my left leg has been broken, my arms bruised, my face scratched, and maybe a few fingers chopped off. its like... thats what he wants to do to me, but because i am part of his family... he CAN'T. thats all that is saving me. but i don't see how he is willing to come back again & offer to take me to the bus when he just bitched about not wanting to chase it & i'm crying so badly that i don't find the idea of being alone with him in a car for 10 minutes... of any comfort. and as far as i am concerned... he plays no important part of my life... i pay for everything i need or want, i go out whenever the fuck i please & do whatever the fuck i want, i take on more than he ever has, i'm paying for fucking college, so all he has to do is work for my brother and sister. mommy can support herself too. hello! o well. this world is crazy... and i'm just glad that i spend it with my family & boyfriend, & friends.

speaking of boyfriend... haha, today is 6 months. can u believe it.... 6 months. this boy is everything to me. if i ain't got u, then everything.... means nothing. <3 "think i fell in love with the 8th world wonder"

i'm out... might as well take advantage that i have time to eat breakfast. yay.

4 . | <3

alwaysfalling

:: 2004 11 April :: 10.27pm
:: Mood: restless
:: Music: phantom planet - california

saturday and sunday

saturday ended up to be great. first, did errands with my dad since he wanted to see me drive. got home and he was like, "i'm done driving for the day," cause i asked him about taking me and bri. well bri and i definitely did not want to sit at home that night so we figured that bowling could work. Got people together and went. It was fun, all the dancing, dorkiness... good times.

Sunday: Happy Easter!
Went to church when i woke up, came home and Patrick (cousin that lives in SF) and his girlfriend Kelly were here. They ate breakfast with us and we talked about Asia. They invited me to come spend time with them when they move to Singapore this summer. I'm definitely going there, after high school graduation, Asia, here i come. Kelly, she's from Singapore, is really nice and I hope she becomes a member of our family. She said to any of you IB people interested in going to UC Berkely, that she thinks you should re-consider because their funding is going down and it's becoming not that great of a school. So after breakfast, they left and we left to go to Melbourne to my Grandma's house. I love going there, but today I just felt like the black sheep. My cousin, Megan, is mad at me still from last weekend and she gave me the silent treatment the whole time. I think that's what mostly made me feel like it though. *shrug* Her Mom was like, "she'll get over it when she needs help moving out of her dorm." heh. i'm not helping, the day before i have oral surgery. that's it, that was easter. hope yours was wonderful.

see you all tomorrow. grrr... 5 day week, with tests. i hate it.

<3

:: 2004 11 April :: 2.13pm

HAPPY EASTER!!
i hope everyone has a great easter...candy..food..n more food. at least thats how it works in my family lol. well we're about ready to leave to grandmas house..ttyl

<3

Find out which band you are!

:: 2004 11 April :: 11.33am
:: Mood: content
:: Music: globes and maps

they didnt play this. but thats okay.
an interesting and awesome memory. i love you girls.

what i did not like about the night:
1) the people who WOULDNT "step back". instead they stepped forward.
2) the huge girls who bad-mouthed emo music/concerts.
3) not being able to hug my christine more and enjoy the music with her.

what i loved about the night:
1) making a lasting memory with ashley before she leaves us.
2) rockin out and wanting to be on that stage someday.
3) its always nice to hear something corporate live.
4) being so happy, i wasn't able to cry.
5) the lead singer of yellowcard playing with his shirt off... damn.
6) enjoying most of the concert with a good view AND lots of space. we're so smart, ashley.

it was just great. i will always be willing to see something corporate again. a lot of time was spent WAITING for people to stop pushing so they both didnt play for that long. but it's okay. <3333 i loved it. loved it. LOVED it.

missed our wonderful katherine who was meant to be there.

the only time i got sad was around the end of konstantine when he sang "i miss you".... yeah.

According to the Which Something Corporate Song Are You? Test...

I am RUFIO.

1 . | <3

:: 2004 11 April :: 9.50am
:: Mood: loved
:: Music: EvEr-BoDy In Da CluB GeTTin'....

TIPSY.
last night was lovely too.

jess, danielle b, danielle g, brittany, shane, jb, emma, and me all went bowling but we didn't set this up until 9pm, and then 9:30 we finally left home. <3

in the car, i got a call from jonah, i didn't know what to do, i was so happy! so i... intelligently, answered the phone. i practically hurt his ear, but that released everything that was stuck inside me... all the love i couldn't give him. he accused me of not being friends with alex, but... i am, because i don't have anything against her & she's sweet. but, we got to the bowling alley, and i needed to get off the phone with him, so, i did. ha.

in the bowling alley, we got everyone together, said our "hellos" and hung out. got our shoes, and paid for our game.... which brittany jipped me $12 for... but its something that always happens. nothing new, thats why i always hated stuff like that. but it was well worth the time spent together. everyone dancing to the music... scoring zero's on every other turn, laughing at random things... <3 this is the life i love.

seTTin' uP Da GaME, G.

Fo' RiZZle

SiStErLy Love <3

Cha, DeFiNiTeLy WaNTed ShAne'S bOOtY

WoRdS CaN'T eVen BeGiN To DeSCRiBE ThiS piC. <3 on OlD TiMEs

2 CooL 4 ThE DiGi CaM.

KiDs, uSaGe oF DruGs MakE u LooK lIke ThiS eVeN if U STOP uSinG thEm.

FriEndS 4eVEr 2.1.12 (sHanE's eYes R ShuT)

EXpReSSiNG LovE 4 ThE VoDkA haha <3 ya Jess

STaTe U ReaCH AfTeR DriNkiN ThE SuBStAnCe iN tHe Cup: TiPsY lol

BriTTanY & EmmA BBFL xox

came home at 12. scared my bro to get the front door open... +shrug+ i forgot my house keys lol <3

3 . | <3

:: 2004 10 April :: 11.34pm

lol tonight was fun even tho i wish it lasted longer....

lol it was another one of Briana's bursts of spontinaity to go bowling tonight. lol yes we are losers but o well. We danced to the music and played a very shitty game and JB brought sum uhh...fun?? lol it was danielle, briana, jb, me and sum people from their neighborhood who were all pretty cool. Bri brought the digicam, she's really taking her new perspective on life seriously kudos for that.

tlkin to amanda...i miss her i should call her more often...

oh omg rite in the lane nxt to us was allen...idk if u know who he is but hes sooooo fucking hot he has to be lyk the hottest guy in the damn school...lol i told heather about it...

MisScarlet219 (11:54:53 PM): he was in the lane nxt to us when we went bowling 2nite
iluvBITP (11:55:00 PM): what kinda car?
MisScarlet219 (11:55:06 PM): no the bowling lane

...lol its ok heather

Evan says he still doesn't know what the other night meant...idk what to think of that I'm going to let him figure it out since I was the one who fucked up the trust before I really have no right to be offended if he doesn't want to be with me i guess...

ok gettin bitched at must sign off

again...happy fuckin easter lol

~Jess~

4 . | <3

:: 2004 10 April :: 7.14pm
:: Music: Darkness-Love is Only a Feeling

I lyk this song...

The first flush of youth was upon you when our eyes first met
And I knew that to you and into your life I had to get
I felt light-headed at the touch of this stranger's hand
An assault my defences systematically failed to withstand

'Cos you came at a time
When the pursuit of one true love in which to fall
Was the be all and end all

Love is only a feeling
(Drifting away)
When I'm in your arms I start believing
(It's here to stay)
But love is only a feeling
Anyway

The state of elation that this unison of hearts achieved
I had seen, I had touched, I had tasted and I truly believed

That the light of my life
Would tear a hole right through each cloud that scudded by
Just to beam on you and I...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Yeah so today was...blah we cleaned all morning, before my grandparents came over my mom woke me up early. I was so tired from spending yet another night up late talking with ppl while on a major sugar high. This made me quite irritable.

I hate my mom and I being on the same pms schedule...my grandparents got a lil caught in our crossfire throughout the day I tried to spend most of it hibernating in my room away from the people...catching up on sleep.

umm went out to dinner...chinese food why is it that in nail salons and chinese food resturants the asian people always seem to be gossiping about you. Makes me uncomfortable...maybe i'll take korean and chinese in college just for this purpose.

we went to publix after....i hate it there.....the bag boy broke the mayonase jar...sum creepy guy in the checkout line (had to be lyk 28-30) was leering at me I wanted to get out.

rented cheaper by the dozen...guess were watching it later. My mom got offended that I wouldnt go to the mall with her when we got home. I think we have had enough of each other for the day I needed some more alone time...sorry mom.

I love mom language around my grandparents...when I was came out dressed for dinner this is what she said "What are you all dressed up for?" translated that really means "why are your tits so exposed in that shirt?"...it amuses me to upset her sometimes.

lol conversations with danielle go to odd places let me just say that...we are the wicker ninjas...just take me to mexico to see my jose and it'll all be alright.

talkin to my little sister Jenn (eagle ette lil sis that is) lol idk why i'm so mean to her. I also should probably listen to her lol

Playbb13 (7:49:15 PM): jess!
Playbb13 (7:49:22 PM): didnt we have a talk about those ex-ROTC boys!

ehh...what can I say they are my vice

I'm going now happy fuckin easter everyone.

~Jess~

1 . | <3

:: 2004 10 April :: 7.26pm
:: Mood: giddy
:: Music: all falls down

BEIN FLIPPED N DROPPED
HEY ALL!

im at carlos' casa con amara..we worked on chem for about a whole hour!! go us! then we played around..listened to music n now we're juss goofin off.. carlos is up to something but wont tell us what..hmm..gotta investigate..lol well im gonna go ttyl

<3

alwaysfalling

:: 2004 10 April :: 1.36pm
:: Mood: contemplative
:: Music: ben folds - annie waits

yeah i definitely believe that a dream is a wish your heart makes.

weekend is turning out to be not so crappy. thank goodness i got better. Went to Palm Beach yesterday and beached a little and then hung out at this house with my 2nd cousins. Then went to the movies last night with Tina and saw "The Girl Next Door." I like that movie. Today I might go to the beach again and then doing something with Briana tonight. Grandma's house tomorrow.

<3

1 . | <3